Simon Suraci

I think this is true more generally of massage scene porn. Porn naturally demands a certain set of criteria, which may be very different from a real, private, in-person massage experience, even if that experience is erotic in nature.

This topic has been mentioned as an aside in various threads elsewhere, but I want to start a new topic specific to this subject. If it’s already covered in a dedicated thread, I haven’t found it yet searching the site. Please link if you know of a previous thread. Clients: How many of you ask for proof of STI testing and/or proof of PrEP regimen, such as a photo of a provider’s prescription, or a PDF of recent test results? Do you ask for proof in person? How important is this “proof” to you? Will you see providers without having this information on hand? Providers: How frequently do clients ask for some sort of “proof” of your medication, or STI testing? How do you respond to such requests? Relatively few of my clients ask. I decline clients with these questions for a few reasons: 1) Unwilling to share personal information listed on my tests and meds. I could strike out the info, but then it could be anyone's test or anyone's vial of pills. Without personally identifying information, I see no way to address the client’s concern. I could just as easily forge a document or take a pic of someone else’s pills and pass them off as my own. There’s no guarantee I am being perfectly honest, and no way to verify. This is why I put “proof” in quotes. 2) Another thing to manage and update and spend time on. A photo of my prescription won’t prove that I took my pills consistently for the past week, and I’m not about to shoot daily videos recording every time I take a pill with a piece of paper noting the date. That’s crazy. 3) A great deal of people contacting me on RentMen are flaky as it is without any extra special screening requests. Going through the additional effort to 'prove' something when the likelihood that they will cancel, not show up, ghost, etc anyway is as high as anyone else. Seems like asking for a lot. I don't have patience for it tbh. 4) Anyone who wants to have sex with me - protected or otherwise - should have realistic expectations of the risks and be willing to take me at my word. People who can't do either of those I really don't want to work with anyway... 5) I’m assuming the type of person who is requiring “proof” of testing and PrEP use is also a person who is NOT doing either of those things, for any number of reasons, which I completely understand. This client is placing the burden on me to be responsible for their own health. I can’t do that. I can’t guarantee anything. I can’t get tested after every client. Incubation periods alone make it impossible to detect sexually transmitted infections in real time. If I say I’m taking PrEP, the client has to believe me. At some point, the client has to take me at my word. I don’t see the point of spending extra time documenting my health practices because it offers no real “proof” to the client. It’s just another thing I have to manage and spend time on for those few clients who ask and insist. I get it. Some providers lie about their status or health practices. There’s nothing I personally can do to police them, and I see nothing more I can do than what I already do which is take my meds and get tested regularly (for me, monthly).

@nycman thanks for your feedback. I get your point and agree with it. Not everyone can do well at both. I think I’m generally better and more comfortable with most people in person, but I’ve never tried making content for online distribution. That might be worth exploring in the future. As far as advertising, if I’m good with in person meets AND digital, I would need to be careful about how, where and when I advertise. Maybe add a blurb clarifying I am on RentMen to offer in person meets and merely post the OF link somewhere without even mentioning it. Some people might be into both, or want to engage digitally before engaging in person. It’s nice to have the option.

I currently do not. Nor do any other media outlets feature video content of me. That could change in the future. Who knows?! Where would you want to hear about it, if I did upload some kind of pay per view or subscription video content? What do you think would be the most appropriate way to share it? Should I post to OF and never link anything to it or advertise it in any way? Include as a sidebar in my other service ads, but not be the focus of the ad? Curious what others would like to see. Considering previous comments, it seems no matter where I tried to promote myself someone would be annoyed at any mention of OF. FYI I’m using OF as a catch-all umbrella term that would include OF, JFF, and other similar sites, not just OnlyFans.

I agree. Anyone advertising on RentMen should be willing and able to meet in person. That’s the point. Just because someone does OF on the side doesn’t mean they can’t or won’t do in person meets. But I get it, some of them use RentMen as a misplaced advertising platform to plug their exclusively online presence. Clients browse RentMen to hire in person services for the most part. If clients wanted to view OF models on screen, they would go straight to OF. Kind of a waste of everyone’s time if it’s only a glorified ad/link for OF.

https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/43130/ I tried Roman today. He got back to me finally after I texted him two days ago. Easy to get to, directions were straightforward, parking was easy. He uses coconut oil, same as me. We had a good conversation for the first half or so of the 90 min session. He’s Russian and his accent is moderately heavy. His twin brother, Alex, is also a masseur living in LA, where they both lived together for years. They have worked on clients together before but he said it’s kind of weird so they don’t usually work together. Roman plans to move back to CA in about a year, so I encourage others to see him before he eventually goes. Roman mentioned Dallas was a great place to offer massage services because of the relative lack of competition compared with NYC and LA. I took no offense to the comment because I know my skill level and I stay busy. I agree, there’s really only a handful of truly exceptional guys in Dallas which surprises me when I consider the greater DFW metro area is such a sizable local market. Since I do quite a bit of market research, I know from my efforts who’s offering what and that my value is actually quite high, yet I charge comparable rates. The only thing I lack compared to some of the others is a muscular gym perfect body…which is fine because plenty of clients prefer my guy-next-door / rugby build, and far more clients really enjoy my work regardless of their personal body type preferences. Anyways, back to Roman…. Great massage. Good pressure, thorough and balanced. Nothing stellar or noteworthy in the deep tissue department. No surprise there because nobody around meets my exacting deep tissue standards. No matter. Still, I recommend Roman. Not any better than my other Dallas recommendations, but right up there. He’s a great looking guy, but he delivers. This is no rub and tug. Roman knows I am a massage therapist, so unfortunately that may have colored my experience compared to that of his average client. I think that made him nervous. He asked for technical feedback after the session and I offered positive comments. It seems Roman was on his best behavior with me, using a towel to drape and did not do anything extra with me beyond a good massage. Which I am perfectly happy with, by the way. It’s always pleasant to discover an option for more is “on the table”, so to speak, even if you decide not to take the option. In this case, no options. He remained clothed the whole time and it was neither sensual nor erotic. YMMV. Others please chime in on this last point. Overall, I had a great experience and recommend Roman.

I’ve seen Mateo once for therapeutic massage. He’s pretty good. Nothing stellar, but a good experience overall. Very friendly and accommodating.

I feel COM is a community based on many shared interests. Because hiring in the M4M space is particularly niche, those interests tend to be overlapping and specific. Even among gay men who have sex with men, many shared interests tend to emerge. We tend to focus on our differences and bicker about those, even with rage and personal attacks at times (which makes me sad) - especially with regard to religion, politics, and identity e.g. race and gender. Nobody is forcing members to read or engage with the topics they don’t like. If something doesn’t interest you or you disagree with comments, it’s perfectly fine to scroll and move on. To scroll, or to troll, that is the question! Despite some very deep divisions along the big no-no topics for thanksgiving dinners, we really are more more similar to one another than we are different, due to our shared niche interests and shared experiences. We may not live in the same places, but I feel connected to a wider community here because it’s a bunch of people who more or less get where I’m coming from and care about things I care about and want to talk about things I want to talk about. Maybe not sports or what you ate for breakfast (in my case), but many of the other categories I very much enjoy reading. In places like Reddit you have to search for very specific niche topics, and even then the audience tends to be broader and less engaged, and some of your niche interests don’t always overlap like they do here. You might read some conversation input from a member and never hear from them again. Here, active members tend to be more engaged and for the longer term. The overlap between all of us is much greater than a place like Reddit, and therefore much smaller and more specific. With fewer total people, it’s easier to connect with people. I think of it as more like a cocktail party in terms of scale compared to a stadium sporting event. Lurkers exist here, as you will find anywhere. No getting around that. Same with problematic people. They exist 🤷‍♂️

I am also on Friendboypro. Same story as MintBoys. The design is inherently less interactive and less engaging for many of the same reasons. The one advantage FriendBoy has is that I can flag my availability like I can on RentMasseur, MasseurFinder, and RentMen. So when I toggle availability, I do so across all four platforms. At least on FriendBoy you know I’m logging in and actively doing something because you can see my availability status. The other big advantage to FriendBoy over RentMen is that it allows me to post my rate as a “Score”. I clarify in my profile that my “Score” ranges from 140-300 depending on services requested. Since I offer massage and escort services I don’t want clients assuming it’s an overpriced massage, or conversely that I only offer escort services based on my “score”.

I’m on MintBoys. A client hired me from there yesterday, for companionship escort services. We hung out (in swimsuits) in the pool at his apartment complex with a mixed crowd of straight people. We had a great conversation and checked out guys together. Had a great time, he loved it. Others have hired me on there before, but very few leads. The ad is free unless you pay for a premium ad placement at the top. I would try premium, but MintBoys ONLY ACCEPTS BITCOIN as payment for premium placement. They don’t accept fiat currency. No credit cards, nothing. Unless you’re willing to manage bitcoin holdings (I’m not), report your crypto holdings to the IRS (I’m not), and you’re ok with the extreme volatility of bitcoin (I’m not), then you are out of luck. This practically forces people to only put free ads on there. Or be the type of person that uses crypto currencies. I love real money, thank you. Free ads, by and large, means a lower caliber provider base. If it costs you nothing, you don’t take it very seriously and don’t put much effort into managing or updating it, which leads to many of the guys on there being the more unprofessional types. I confess I don’t spend much time managing mine. Some of my clients commented that they would never hire off MB because it looks like a bunch of “thugs”. I take this to be coded racist language. While it’s true there are many more black and brown people advertising, they vary in their presentation, profile content, and professionalism. The majority (of any race, white included) tend to present themselves in a way I consider less professional… ….Selfies, flashing a middle finger, blowing smoke into the camera, low quality photos, extremely manipulated or filtered photos, poor writing in the ad, drug references, scowling expressions, stuff like that. Overall they don’t look as good as the providers advertising on RentMen or RentMasseur IMO. MB has no engagement built in. That’s why ads are old or outdated. Post it and forget it. As a provider, you don’t know metrics of how many views you get, you can’t see who viewed you, there’s no messaging system, no review system, no travel dates system, no other content providers can post like a blog or anything else longer than a short description and a phone number. Compared to RM, it’s like the yellow pages before we had the internet. Yes, I am that old! I’ve also used a Thomas guide more than a few times in my early driving career. I digress… Before you dismiss MB completely, remember some providers on there are real and active and current. MB is one more way for me to introduce myself. RentMasseur generates many more leads, but if over a year I got even one client spending several hundreds of dollars for one session (and I did just yesterday), it still makes sense for me to advertise there. They’re not all bad.

You can get tested for each type (1 or 2) of herpes simplex virus (HSV), but doctors do not routinely test for it with regular prep labs like they do for chlamydia, gonorrhea, HIV, syphilis, and to a lesser extent each type of hepatitis and other STIs. A very large percentage of the population has herpes. Estimates vary, but here is a range. I can only reasonably believe the rates are much higher among men who have sex with men. And even higher for men who have sex with men for work: In the U.S., 48% of the population have HSV-1, whereas 12% have HSV-2. There is no cure once you have either type of herpes, so it’s highly likely anyone here is regularly coming into contact with people who have herpes, although only some will exhibit an active outbreak at any given time. I agree nobody should be allowing touch with an active outbreak, and no it’s impossible to NOT notice you have an active outbreak. And yes almost everyone here will eventually get genital herpes at some point in their life. It’s unfortunately very common and normal especially in MSM communities. Herpes is a part of our world. Avoid coming into contact with, or spreading active outbreaks. Manage symptoms. That’s all you can do. You can manage symptoms with antiretrovirals. If you notice your masseur has sores, avoid contact.

It would do us all well to stick to the original topic of how/if race affects rates. The question of why race may play into it is a much bigger question about systemic bias I don’t think we will ever have the time or space to get to the bottom of here. People have different desires at different times in their lives. Do what you want. Hire who you want. At the same time, I recommend clients be open to trying people and experiences different from what they normally would gravitate toward. Life is richer and fuller that way, IMHO.

Anyone feel free to PM me directly with questions or comments, or reach me on any of my several ad platforms or website. Or private message other members who have seen me to get their insights. My contributions here will necessarily be biased. I’m posting this message for everyone to know where to reach me and then staying out of this thread. I’d rather clients comment on me candidly here. I’ll do my best to not take things personally or try to influence conversations about me here. It’s important to share info freely and not feel like you’re being monitored. Even though it’s kind of difficult for me to ignore…I will try to. My contributions in the forums are often long winded, yes, but also quite thoughtful. At least that’s what other members I respect say about me. I’m moving to San Diego, CA in August 2023. You may find me traveling to other cities here and there in the future, but my home base will be San Diego for the foreseeable future. The past two years I’ve spent in Dallas, TX. Many clients in the DFW area can speak to the quality of my work, or those who have traveled to Dallas and seen me there. My specialty is deep tissue massage. Clients enjoy the balance I offer between quality therapy and sensual / erotic elements. Have fun, keep calm, and get a massage!

This happens to me too. A client texted me today to schedule a shorter, lower cost session right in the middle of a big block of availability where I could otherwise schedule two longer, higher value sessions. I honored the shorter session because he booked first. I give priority to those who book ahead, or whoever books first. I keep my word after I book them. In this case I had to turn down two higher session value clients because the resulting two blocks of time were each too short to fulfill either of the higher fee session requests. Then….the low value client no shows. No cancellation message, nothing, just ghosts. So now I’m out of the lower value fee AND the two higher value fees. Frustrating. Sometimes this happens, especially with new clients, and I accept that. I don’t let it bother me anymore. If I had canceled on the low value client to accommodate the two higher value clients, the two higher value clients may have canceled or no-showed as well. You never know with new clients what they are going to do. You can’t win, and there’s no way to game the system. Some clients are real jerks sometimes and there’s no escaping that. I honor my first booked, first priority policy because it’s the only objective, low stress way to handle these matters. It also rewards and encourages clients booking ahead, which I prefer anyway. This is the reason a lot of providers behave the way they do. I’m not saying it’s right, but our schedules are constantly changing. It feels like we’re reacting to a dozen things out of our control and trying to make the best of all the moving parts each hour of the day as it changes. And we’re trying to make good money and use our time most effectively. The occasional unusual circumstance outside of my control pops up requiring me to cancel or reschedule on a client, but I never cancel because I got a “better offer”. Unusual circumstances are things like my whole building fire alarm is sounding.

Or…just ask! Lol At least this gives you a reasonable starting point so you’re not expecting your provider to give you free services, or to underprice their services. Massages have value. Full service has value. It’s most equitable to pay time and rate for both.

Masseur’s 1-hr massage rate + masseur’s 1-hr full service rate Example: 60 min massage: $150 0-60 min full service: $300 Total: $450 A general rule of thumb: 3x the masseur’s 60 min massage rate. To do everything in one hour, split up however which way, figure 2x the masseur’s 60 min massage rate. Every provider will vary, of course.

The answer is relative to who is asking. I would recommend any of a half dozen or so masseurs depending on your personal priorities and needs. There is no one-masseur-fits all. Nobody is objectively better in every possible category than all the others, and everyone’s criteria is a little bit different. My personal top priorities are high quality deep tissue skills and professionalism. Everything else factors in to a varying lesser degrees. I haven’t been able to try all the choices over the past couple years, but I’ve seen quite a few, primarily for market research purposes. I would try more on my list, but I’m running short on time before my move to CA. I’d like to try Roman, for instance, based on thread comments. If I can this week, I will. I would normally avoid a guy who looks like Roman because more often than not the massage is lackluster in favor of “the view”, which is nice but tbh I don’t care. Even from a superficial carnal perspective muscle gods aren’t my thing, so it’s not that exciting to me anyway. Still, I appreciate a good looking fit man the same as the next guy. Massage quality is way more important to me. If he’s as good as others say, I’d really like to try him. Same thinking about Roman applies to Tristan. He’s a personal trainer and a muscle god too. I would normally pass assuming I’m paying mostly for the view, but from the intel here I decided to try him a while back and I’m happy to say I highly recommend Tristan. Excellent massage, one of the best around. Still not quite up to my standards (nobody in Dallas is), but he’s among the best available. He doesn’t do much in the way of extras, and that may be a downside for many of the clients reading here, maybe even be a dealbreaker for some. He offers HE for a $50 upcharge and he’s up front about it before the session which I appreciate. I saw him for therapeutic only because I don’t need any extras or HE or MT or any of that. At $150 for 90 mins therapeutic only, there’s no better value in town. Amazing. He’s among my top recommendations. Others I highly recommend for various reasons, alongside Tristan: JD, Dann, Jayden (leaving soon) Kade on MasseurFinder. Late 20s. Strictly therapeutic, outcall. No HE, MT, or other extras, don’t ask. Stays completely clothed the whole time. He’s strictly professional and quite guarded about client advances, borderline paranoid about it. No problem for me because I only want a therapeutic massage. If you see him, please show respect for his boundaries and you’ll be fine. Excellent skills, very reasonable rates. Cute. Works part time at a call center or retail, can’t remember which one he does currently. Fernando in Bedford, TX. Only advertises on MintBoys, not your traditional go-to places like MasseurFinder or RentMasseur. Offers Lomi Lomi and traditional massage, both sessions very good. Therapeutic, a lot more technical. 20s, Italian accent. Offers HE. It’s not the focus. Remains fully clothed until the end. YMMV. Book in advance. The following two you can find on RentMasseur. I work with them for 4-hand and other sessions. Each are more sensual/erotic. I can’t rate them overall as highly as the others because my personal needs are more therapeutic, but if an erotic and/or sensual spectrum experience is more important to you than traditional therapy, I recommend them. Glenn is more skilled with traditional massage but goes pretty sensual as well. Langston it’s more of an erotic focus. Btw, they each offer full service sessions at different rates: Glenn (Mustachioedman) Langston Here below is my regular guy in Dallas. I chose him because he is the only one who almost meets my very demanding deep tissue needs. He is certified, excellent at his craft, a joy to be around, and a great guy. I consider him a personal friend. Excellent therapeutic deep tissue work. Sweet, funny, bearish type, around my age. Tons of personality and spirit. He’s chatty, so be warned that may not be the best for everyone. I’m sure you can have a quieter session with him if you want to. Usually I prefer to zen out quietly during a massage, but he and I click and we enjoy talking the whole time. Chris (Oak Lawn) Therapeutic only, incall only. Maybe HE if you’re not pushy or grabby or aggressive about it. Stays clothed the whole time. I skip the HE even though I’m sure he would do that for me, I just don’t want/need that. I’m there for full body therapeutic deep tissue, and he consistently delivers.

https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/37629/ Justin’s above thread is expired, so I’m starting a new one. I saw Justin earlier this year. If any others have feedback, please share, positive or otherwise. My experience was a profound flop. Justin is a nice guy, nothing against him personally at all. He’s pleasant. He just doesn’t provide a worthwhile massage experience. Everything about the experience felt to me like he doesn’t take his massage work very seriously. I do not recommend. A few highlights: Easy to schedule. So-so massage. Not skilled. Very little pressure, low quality. Not bad or painful or anything, just not worth a standard range massage fee IMHO. Music had ads. Who doesn’t love a good half dozen plugs for the Home Depot while they’re trying to relax? Massage space was an afterthought. He massages in his office in a business park in Medical District area where he works as a meteorologist. It has green screens and everything. Not a great environment. Pics are sorely outdated, and bad quality to begin with. I wasn’t primarily interested in his looks as an important part of my session, and he’s not bad looking in any way, but I do feel it’s only fair to note he’s a little different looking in person. Rather mechanical ending. Meh. He offered a little mutual touch at the end which didn’t interest me, otherwise clothed the whole time. Mutual nude and/or mutual touch is nice at times and I know others rather enjoy it, so there you go. Really this part of the experience is the least important to me.

It’s true. I say screw it. I’m busy enough without having to flag myself as available, and even when I do all the right things I still can’t boost my rating more than a couple spaces upward. I still do flag sometimes to help boost my rating, but I only do it when I’m actually available.

He canceled on me 5-10 mins into the appointment, same thing, family emergency. He didn’t charge me. So-so massage, not worth it based on the time I actually had with him, which was already a big disappointment. Frankly relieved I didn’t stay the whole time and have to pay for that. Attractive guy. Maybe escorting suits him better.

Posted this in the other thread on Jayden. Recently had a wonderful experience with Jayden, highly recommend. Must. Book. Ahead! And it’s totally worth it. Be patient. Heads up he is moving this summer. He plans to live out of state and spend part of the year in Mexico. Good for him. See him while he’s still in north Dallas while you still can! Not my top guy in Dallas because I have very high standards for massage quality, but he’s up way up there. He gives a great balance of quality therapy, looks, friendliness, and level of interaction. Goes the whole time, clear directions. Sexy voice (and body omg!). Looks just like his photos but friendlier in person. Great smile. 35 yo this year. You will love him.

Wholeheartedly agree, Dann and Tristan too. Recently had a wonderful experience with Jayden, highly recommend. Must. Book. Ahead! And it’s totally worth it. Be patient. Heads up he is moving this summer. He plans to live out of state and spend part of the year in Mexico. Good for him. See him while he’s still in north Dallas while you still can! Not my top guy in Dallas because I have very high standards for massage quality, but he’s up way up there. He gives a great balance of quality therapy, looks, friendliness, and level of interaction. Goes the whole time, clear directions. Sexy voice (and body omg!). Looks just like his photos but friendlier in person. Great smile. 35 yo this year. You will love him.