The Ex BFE

[jjkrkwood]

you're assuming that I am / I was a much older gentleman.....gentleman - yes, generally I am....(that much) older - wrong assumption.....anyway, I also think you're wrong about saying that everyone knows the score when seeing older/younger couples together.....especially in Las Vegas where there are no safe assumptions.....sometimes maybe good guesses but even a good guess is way different from an assumption......(looks & actual age aside, I maintain the mindset of a 22 year old & am enjoying that fact - it fits my own personal-choice lifestyle).

 

 

Having a young mind does not equate to a young body and face on an Older gent. We see what we want to see when we look in the mirror, but the truth can only be found thru the eyes of others. I dont care if its Vegas or Timbuktu, an older gent squiring around a young boytoy usually has one implication. I am not saying your reaction was wrong for YOU, only saying I might have handled it differently had it been ME.

[caliguy]

I believe that he may have seen this post, and has been discussing it with others. If that is correct, he hasn’t reached out to me to discuss it and probably not be interested in continuing the hiring arrangement. And if that is the case, it’s time to close this chapter in my life. If he reads this last post from me on this, I want him to know that I had a lot of fun and happy times with him, I have no ill feeling toward him, and that I wish him well. His presence in my life will be sadly missed

 

I had fun kid. Thanks

I have an idea. Why not find a more mature guy for dinner dates and keep the young ones for the bedroom fun. I don't think your situation is all that unique. Like jjkrkwood said. The situation was probably obvious. You yourself said he was pretty much the opposite of you. I think his reaction was very normal as a matter of fact as most young guys are also pretty vain.

 

I've been in a few of these situations myself. I met a friend for dinner and he had a young companion with him. After dinner he made sure to walk way ahead of us so no one knew. Another friend took a kid on a cruise with him. He found out a few of his friends were on the same cruise and made sure to stay on opposite sides of the ship until night time.

[LookingAround]

I have an idea. Why not find a more mature guy for dinner dates and keep the young ones for the bedroom fun.

 

Ridiculous. He shouldn’t or needn’t be embarrassed. Have dinner with whomever you want and to hell with what anyone thinks.

[caliguy]

Ridiculous. He shouldn’t or needn’t be embarrassed. Have dinner with whomever you want and to hell with what anyone thinks.

I agree when you get older we all kind of get that "the hell with anyone else thinks". We're talking about young very image conscience twenty somethings though.

[LookingAround]

I agree when you get older we all kind of get that "the hell with anyone else thinks". Were talking about young very image conscience twenty somethings though.

You can’t be serious.

[caliguy]

Ridiculous. He shouldn’t or needn’t be embarrassed..

Isn't that the whole point of this posting though?

[parumph]

Move on. He was terrible to you. There are many others you can see.

[jjkrkwood]

Ridiculous. He shouldn’t or needn’t be embarrassed. Have dinner with whomever you want and to hell with what anyone thinks.

 

Agreed, especially if you feel that good about yourself !

[Reluctant Daddy]

Happy hunting, RD!

 

Unfortunately, this whole episode has pretty much soured me on hiring again.

[+ Avalon]

Unfortunately, this whole episode has pretty much soured me on hiring again.

 

Never give up! There are many good escorts. But be upfront of what you want and expect. Hold nothing back, let them know.

[P Gren]

I've had prior extended sessions with him, which makes it all the more puzzling.

Was this your first public experience with him?

[+ Gar1eth]

Was this your first public experience with him?

 

From what he’s said, no it wasn’t.

 

Gman

[MscleLovr]

Unfortunately, this whole episode has pretty much soured me on hiring again.

 

I'm sorry to hear that. I think it's wrong for you to curtail the pleasure you take in life.

 

I'd encourage you to try again with another guy whose looks appeal to you. Have some fun and take him out for a good dinner afterwards (but don't invite your friends along too). Many nice young men appreciate an older man, especially one who's generous and picks up the dinner check.

 

And FWIW I've dated a lot of young men over the years. Four proved desirable long-term companions, while others were pleasant company for several dates over a few months. And there were a few disastrous one-time dates, including one spectacularly bad no-hope date which still makes me chuckle when I look back on it (especially as the young man concerned chased me for second and third dates). But if I hadn't kept dating, I wouldn't have met the lovely young man who now lives with me.

[TXDav]

I was eating at a casual restaurant that I enjoyed many times before, but on one occasion the experience was horrible for many different reasons. When my food finally arrived at the table, the manager was also there with an apology saying they realize there were issues and would like to make it up to me next time with this gift card. I have since returned, and enjoyed many more meals there. Like many here have said, everyone has a bad night. But true professionals recognize that, and will try and rectify the situation. Your provider should have been able to discern the experience he delivered was subpar, and he didn't deliver on expectations. He could have stopped it, if he was having an off night. He has not reached out to apologize, explain, or make up for it. This says everything you need to know. He clearly has issues that are his own, and not yours. Don't overthink it. It's on him, not you. I'm glad you decided to move on. Give it some time and hire someone new when you are ready.

Edited December 5, 2017 by TXDav

[P Gren]

From what he’s said, no it wasn’t.

 

Gman

He said he had other 'extended sessions' with him, but he never said if any of them were public. To me, in re-reading posts, it's unclear if this was the first public session. And I can see how that could have a different dynamic - introducing him to friends for example rather than one on one in private.

[hougalwizard]

Having a young mind does not equate to a young body and face on an Older gent. We see what we want to see when we look in the mirror, but the truth can only be found thru the eyes of others. I dont care if its Vegas or Timbuktu, an older gent squiring around a young boytoy usually has one implication. I am not saying your reaction was wrong for YOU, only saying I might have handled it differently had it been ME.

Perhaps one way to dispel the obvious (and true) assumption is to provide the young man with Personal Assistant accoutrements a la Hollywood. It could be part of the fantasy until the escort wants to pretend to be a young heir apparent himself.

[former lurker]

I recently had an extended session with a semi regular that was a bit bizarre, to say the least. It started off fine, but over the course of the session, it didn’t seem to go well. He initially agreed to go to dinner with friends of mine, but when the time came, he begged off saying that they would know something was up (“I mean look at you, and look at me”). He bolted after every meal, leaving me at the restaurant and wondering if he was coming back. When we went out, he seemed to walk ahead or behind me, like he didn’t want to be seen with me. When playtime came, he wasn’t able to “clean up” (though subsequent posts and reviews, he didn’t seem to have any issues with this for his other sessions). I usually enjoy my time with him, but this time left me reeling. Should I discuss this with him, or should I just walk away and say it’s over?

 

I've read your posts here. You seem high maintenance. Maybe it's you, and not them.

[sexymonk]

you're assuming that I am / I was a much older gentleman.....gentleman - yes, generally I am....(that much) older - wrong assumption.....anyway, I also think you're wrong about saying that everyone knows the score when seeing older/younger couples together.....especially in Las Vegas where there are no safe assumptions.....sometimes maybe good guesses but even a good guess is way different from an assumption......(looks & actual age aside, I maintain the mindset of a 22 year old & am enjoying that fact - it fits my own personal-choice lifestyle).

I think whether we accept or not, the age difference matters and not many boys are comfortable to be in public with older guys. Even not many gold digger girls hang with daddies in public. It is good to respect the comfort zone of boys and not push it!

[sexymonk]

Having a young mind does not equate to a young body and face on an Older gent. We see what we want to see when we look in the mirror, but the truth can only be found thru the eyes of others. I dont care if its Vegas or Timbuktu, an older gent squiring around a young boytoy usually has one implication. I am not saying your reaction was wrong for YOU, only saying I might have handled it differently had it been ME.

Agreed! Even in normal walk of life It is rare to see young guys hanging with very old guys. People generally hang within +/- 10-12 years. It is very common human tendency except maybe with ladyboys!

[KennF]

I've read your posts here. You seem high maintenance. Maybe it's you, and not them.

I think whether we accept or not, the age difference matters and not many boys are comfortable to be in public with older guys. Even not many gold digger girls hang with daddies in public. It is good to respect the comfort zone of boys and not push it!

 

Whether a client is high maintenance or not is irrelevant. The profession is all about companionship. The escort's job is to be there for the client and provide for the experience.

 

If the escort is embarrassed, or has personal issues about being seen with someone who doesn't fit the escort's vision, then too bad for the escort. It is their job to make that client feel important and special, or, to not accept the client at all.

 

If they are uncomfortable with an unanticipated situation, then it is their responsibility to respectfully end the encounter and, possibly, accommodate the client for services not rendered.

[LookingAround]

Whether a client is high maintenance or not is irrelevant. The profession is all about companionship. The escort's job is to be there for the client and provide for the experience.

 

If the escort is embarrassed, or has personal issues about being seen with someone who doesn't fit the escort's vision, then too bad for the escort. It is their job to make that client feel important and special, or, to not accept the client at all.

 

If they are uncomfortable with an unanticipated situation, then it is their responsibility to respectfully end the encounter and, possibly, accommodate the client for services not rendered.

Can I find that job description published somewhere other than your post?

[P Gren]

you're assuming that I am / I was a much older gentleman.....gentleman - yes, generally I am....(that much) older - wrong assumption.....anyway, I also think you're wrong about saying that everyone knows the score when seeing older/younger couples together.....especially in Las Vegas where there are no safe assumptions.....sometimes maybe good guesses but even a good guess is way different from an assumption......(looks & actual age aside, I maintain the mindset of a 22 year old & am enjoying that fact - it fits my own personal-choice lifestyle).

Its easy and obvious telling the difference from two guys hanging out (let's say, one of them is a guy you would hire with another one that you wouldn't) both in town for a conference/convention and two guys that are 'together' on a BFE. Young mindset? No young guys ever say that ... only old guys say that

[KennF]

LOL

 

Don't we all wish we had written job descriptions?

[+ Gar1eth]

Agreed! Even in normal walk of life It is rare to see young guys hanging with very old guys. People generally hang within +/- 10-12 years. It is very common human tendency except maybe with ladyboys!

 

Whether a client is high maintenance or not is irrelevant. The profession is all about companionship. The escort's job is to be there for the client and provide for the experience.

 

If the escort is embarrassed, or has personal issues about being seen with someone who doesn't fit the escort's vision, then too bad for the escort. It is their job to make that client feel important and special, or, to not accept the client at all.

 

If they are uncomfortable with an unanticipated situation, then it is their responsibility to respectfully end the encounter and, possibly, accommodate the client for services not rendered.

 

I have to agree with you here, @KennF. As often happens in these discussions, the pendulum seems to slowly (or sometimes not so slowly) swing to the side of the escort-i.e. the client must have done something wrong. This is especially prominent when someone has ‘picked on’ another member’s favorite.

 

I’m sorry-people of different ages associate with each other all the time. I have a Facebook friend, the father of three. He’s currently in NYC with the two oldest-a girl and a boy at least one of the children is probably 21 and the other is close to it. If he goes out without his husband, and is alone with his son is everybody going to think the young incredibly handsome son is an escort (although to be truthful the Dad is really handsome too). Years ago I took one of my nieces-probably 20 years old at the time out for lunch when I was visiting the city she went to college in. I’m a fat bald guy and a subordinate of mine saw a picture of my niece once and asked whether she was a model. So did I have to be her sugar daddy just because we were having lunch together? Sure we-esp in our gay community at large and esp in this one -might wonder at seeing an attractive lad with an older gent, but it could be a father/son, actual Uncle/nephew, grandfather/grandson, or a boss/employee as just some examples.

 

Gman

[P Gren]

Whether a client is high maintenance or not is irrelevant. The profession is all about companionship. The escort's job is to be there for the client and provide for the experience.

 

If the escort is embarrassed, or has personal issues about being seen with someone who doesn't fit the escort's vision, then too bad for the escort. It is their job to make that client feel important and special, or, to not accept the client at all.

 

If they are uncomfortable with an unanticipated situation, then it is their responsibility to respectfully end the encounter and, possibly, accommodate the client for services not rendered.

There's unanticipated - the taxi was late - and there is unanticipated - spending hours with a group of the client's friends as 'what exactly?' What are the options? Honesty: "I'm here because he's paid for my time for a BFE. What do you do for a living?" Faking a story: what story? what has the client already said? "We met in the laundry room and he helped fold my underwear." Leaving discretely with no charge and a learning experience may have been the best option.