Where is YOUR secret hiding place?

[samhexum]

A Florida man is now the butt of police's jokes.

 

Pattreon Stokes is charged with stuffing over $1,000 into his rectum in a sorry attempt to hide the cash from cops, according to the Marion County Sheriff's Office.

 

The 26-year-old was pulled over by authorities for speeding early Saturday morning. The deputy who pulled Stokes over smelled marijuana coming from inside the car and a search was carried out. Cops found 197 grams of methamphetamine, rock cocaine and 4 grams of heroin.

 

A small scale, a small amount of marijuana and a large amount of money were also found. Stokes also had a 7-month-old child in the car at the time.

 

However, when deputies later showed up to collect the money Stokes had on him, they discovered the cash was gone. Stokes allegedly claimed it had already been collected.

 

That's when deputies noticed a couple of $20 bills spilling out from his — how do we put this delicately? — buttocks.

 

The Marion County Sheriff's Office then briefly explained what happened next in an amusing Facebook post.

 

"After a necessary but undesirable process for everyone involved, MCSO Detention Deputies located $1,090.00 in U.S. currency hidden in Stokes' rectum. How many rolls of pennies do you think there were? Judging from Stokes' mug shot, he looks pretty "bummed" about the whole situation…" the Facebook post read.

 

 

The page also joked about the cashiers in Marion County, saying they'd understand if they chose to use gloves on the job from now on.

 

Stokes was charged with smuggling contraband into a detention facility, trafficking methamphetamine, trafficking heroin, possession of cocaine with the intent to sell, manufacture or deliver, possession of marijuana and possession of drug equipment.

 

"CRACK MONEY": MAN STUFFS OVER $1,000 IN RECTUM IN ATTEMPT TO HIDE IT FROM DEPUTIES

 

To quote everyone’s mom, “Don’t put that in your mouth, you don’t know where it’s been!!”

 

In the early morning hours of Saturday, August 26, 2017, Deputy Calvin Batts conducted a traffic stop on a white Buick in the area of East Highway 40 and Baseline Road for speeding. Upon making contact with the driver, Pattreon Stokes (DOB: 07/08/1991), Deputy Batts smelled the odor of marijuana coming from inside the vehicle. Deputies searched the vehicle and found approximately 197 grams of Methamphetamine, Rock Cocaine and 4 grams of Heroin. A scale was also located inside the vehicle. Stokes also had a small amount of marijuana and a large amount of currency on his person. The defendant was arrested and taken to the Marion County Jail.

 

When they arrived at the jail, the money Stokes had on his person appeared to be missing. Stokes said that deputies had already collected it, but this was certainly not true. Detention deputies then noticed something quite unusual… they observed $20.00 bills falling from Stokes’ buttocks area. After a necessary but undesirable process for everyone involved, MCSO Detention Deputies located $1,090.00 in U.S. currency hidden in Stokes’ rectum. Judging from Stokes’ mug shot, he looks pretty “bummed” about the whole situation…

 

For all of our wonderful cashiers in Marion County, we apologize for giving you this terrible mental image today. If you choose to use gloves during your daily duties, we will understand.

 

Also worthy of mention: Stokes had a 7 month old child in the front passenger seat of his vehicle while he was trafficking drugs. Stokes was arrested and charged with Smuggling Contraband into a Detention Facility, Trafficking Methamphetamine, Trafficking Heroin, Possession of Cocaine with the Intent to Sell, Manufacture or Deliver, Possession of Marijuana and Possession of Drug Equipment.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

Having worked in banking for over three decades, there are many times when handling money requires gloves. Early in my career, a customer came in with a wad of cash to buy a certificate of deposit. The customer claims she had forgotten it in her earthen vault for over ten years. It was so fuzzy, no one on staff would touch it and we made the customer count it out for us.

 

I am guessing that the banks in Houston will need to use hazmat suits to count their vaults after waters recede from Harvey. We had vaults under water for a couple of weeks from Katrina and it was a mess.

[+ purplekow]

There was a time when I had about $100,000 in cash in my home. I took a roll of gift wrapping paper and put the money inside of the roll and then took the roll and put it in a box of Christmas items which included several other rolls of wrapping paper. That box was in the attic. It was a great hiding spot but at this point in time, I do not need to have a spot to hide that much cash so all I use is a large jar to hide my change.

[OneFinger]

My "secret" hiding place looks like a beer can. But, it actually has a twist off top but the inside holds over $1,000 in small bills. It's my emergency money and I keep it in the refrigerator with my other beer cans. I make sure it's in small denominations because in an emergency a store may not be able to make change for large bills. Don't want to pay $20 for a loaf of bread.

 

http://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/7KAAAOSwr~lYm859/s-l1600.jpg

 

http://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/KQgAAOSwCU1Ym85~/s-l1600.jpg

[sincitymix]

i put money between the pages of a particularly old book

[bigvalboy]

When I was renovating, I kept extra cash down in the bulk dog food. Now that life is back to normal, and more concerned about fire than theft, I opted for a more traditional approach.

[gallahadesquire]

When I was renovating, I kept extra cash down in the bulk dog food. Now that life is back to normal, and more concerned about fire than theft, I opted for a more traditional approach.

 

Do you have a dog? If not, it's kind of a giveaway.

[jjkrkwood]

Who am I hiding it from, I live Alone ? I am too old to remember where I hide things, so now its out in the open. In the event I'm burgled, let the culprit get something for his efforts.

[bigvalboy]

Do you have a dog? If not, it's kind of a giveaway.

 

At the time I had a dog, and in my gut, I didn't trust the contractors. My gut turned out to be right.

[gallahadesquire]

At the time I had a dog, and in my gut, I didn't trust the contractors. My gut turned out to be right.

 

I was a bit of a hoarder, and wound up in the hospital for three and a half months. During that time, my sister had my house "cleaned". Among the missing items was a 1970, blue linen dial rolex.

 

She denies any responsibility for its disappearance.

[+ Charlie]

If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret any longer, would it?

[MiamiLooker]

A couple of years ago, after awakening from a colonoscopy, the nurse told me I’d asked while I was sedated if they’d found my watch. I’d joked about it a few days earlier but never dreamed that I’d actually say it. And no, the watch wasn’t found.

[+ sync]

Pattreon Stokes is charged with stuffing over $1,000 into his rectum in a sorry attempt to hide the cash from cops, according to the Marion County Sheriff's Office.

 

Ewwww! Another level of "dirty money."

[bigvalboy]

. Among the missing items was a 1970, blue linen dial rolex.

 

Now that would seriously piss me off...Sorry that it came up missing. I've always liked the classic vintage look.

[gallahadesquire]

First attempt didn't work. Not the greatest photo, but you get the idea. There's horizontal texture to the dial. The "engine turned" bezel perfectly fits this. The band was an oyster band; the jubilee band was a replacement. (If you google blue linen rolex it'll show up.)

 

There was a history, too. There was a store in Massachusetts called the Building 19, that bought up all sorts of random stuff. There had been a fire in a Philadelphia jewelry store that caused smoke damage to the goods, which were otherwise intact.

 

The Building 19 bought the stock as part of the insurance settlement. The list price (1974) was $350, and I bought it for 50% off. I had it from 1974 to 2010.

 

 

It was my precioussssss and I miss it.

 

ADDENDUM: Several dealers told me they had never seen a dial like that before. Apparently, it wasn't very common. I saw it and fell in love with it.