The Nominees for My First Hire: Montreal or NY

[+ glutes]

Yannickfrench

[NowOrNever]

My first time was terrible. Perhaps the second or third time will be the charm.

 

One of my friends owns a house by the lake, and a small group of us decided to spend the night there one last time before the weather gets too cold. The host decided to ask his favorite escort along for an overnight date, and suggested the rest of us do the same. As it turned out, the host's date had other friends in the business, and I was introduced to a young man who was really attractive, sincere, and nice. Or so I thought.

 

With all the men being friends and most of the escorts knowing each other as well, I thought it was be a good, relaxed, non-pressured way to engage my first hire. I outlined my wishes: I wanted to have an all-night "boyfriend experience," including dinner and chatting with the group, and then going off by ourselves, perhaps for a walk by the lake, and getting to know each other better. At bed time, we would spend the night together in one of the guest bedrooms. I told him what I was into, what I liked to do, and he gave me an enthusiastic and positive confirmation.

 

Unfortunately, come date night, a few of the "boys" (including my companion) overindulged in alcohol, and ended up disappearing into the master bedroom to have an escort-only orgy among themselves. They locked the door from the inside, although the rest of us could obviously hear what was going on. They were in there for more than two hours.

 

When they eventually emerged, I made it clear that I expected my date to be just that: MY DATE. Closing himself off in the bedroom and having sex with other guys was not my idea of a "boyfriend experience."

 

He apologized and blamed it on the alcohol, but promised to make it up to me later.

 

The problem was, LATER it happened again, only this time with my date, a few different escorts, and one of the drunken older men who had offered him some quick cash for oral sex.

 

I told my escort again that he was not keeping his word and not providing me with the boyfriend experience he had promised. He replied that ANY escort would do the same thing under the circumstances. Any escort would take the opportunity to make additional money with another client if it were offered. Then the kicker: I supposedly just did not understand the rules of the game because it was my first time. If I were more experienced, I would understand and not be complaining so much.

 

I told him that any plans we had had together were now cancelled. He was free to do whatever he wanted, and with whom. I would wait to become more experienced with someone more willing to keep up his end of the bargain. He countered that even if I cancelled, I still had to pay him for the overnight date anyway, because he had shown up and I was responsible for compensating him for his time.

 

I refused, he got pissed, and the situation got ugly. He ended up leaving in a huff, which made some of his escort friends uneasy and put a damper on the entire evening.

 

It was, overall, a terrible experience. I would rather never hire again than deal with shit like this. It's only my unquenchable horniness that will drive me back into the arms of another escort, LOL.

[Jbdesc]

My first time was terrible. Perhaps the second or third time will be the charm.

 

One of my friends owns a house by the lake, and a small group of us decided to spend the night there one last time before the weather gets too cold. The host decided to ask his favorite escort along for an overnight date, and suggested the rest of us do the same. As it turned out, the host's date had other friends in the business, and I was introduced to a young man who was really attractive, sincere, and nice. Or so I thought.

 

With all the men being friends and most of the escorts knowing each other as well, I thought it was be a good, relaxed, non-pressured way to engage my first hire. I outlined my wishes: I wanted to have an all-night "boyfriend experience," including dinner and chatting with the group, and then going off by ourselves, perhaps for a walk by the lake, and getting to know each other better. At bed time, we would spend the night together in one of the guest bedrooms. I told him what I was into, what I liked to do, and he gave me an enthusiastic and positive confirmation.

 

Unfortunately, come date night, a few of the "boys" (including my companion) overindulged in alcohol, and ended up disappearing into the master bedroom to have an escort-only orgy among themselves. They locked the door from the inside, although the rest of us could obviously hear what was going on. They were in there for more than two hours.

 

When they eventually emerged, I made it clear that I expected my date to be just that: MY DATE. Closing himself off in the bedroom and having sex with other guys was not my idea of a "boyfriend experience."

 

He apologized and blamed it on the alcohol, but promised to make it up to me later.

 

The problem was, LATER it happened again, only this time with my date, a few different escorts, and one of the drunken older men who had offered him some quick cash for oral sex.

 

I told my escort again that he was not keeping his word and not providing me with the boyfriend experience he had promised. He replied that ANY escort would do the same thing under the circumstances. Any escort would take the opportunity to make additional money with another client if it were offered. Then the kicker: I supposedly just did not understand the rules of the game because it was my first time. If I were more experienced, I would understand and not be complaining so much.

 

I told him that any plans we had had together were now cancelled. He was free to do whatever he wanted, and with whom. I would wait to become more experienced with someone more willing to keep up his end of the bargain. He countered that even if I cancelled, I still had to pay him for the overnight date anyway, because he had shown up and I was responsible for compensating him for his time.

 

I refused, he got pissed, and the situation got ugly. He ended up leaving in a huff, which made some of his escort friends uneasy and put a damper on the entire evening.

 

It was, overall, a terrible experience. I would rather never hire again than deal with shit like this. It's only my unquenchable horniness that will drive me back into the arms of another escort, LOL.

 

Nooooo! I'm sorry to hear your first experience was not a positive one. I'm yet to have a bad experience, ive had one that was lackluster, but still I wouldn't call it bad by any means. I suppose from what I'm told everyone will have one at some point in time though.

 

It sounds like you may have put yourself into a very complex situation for your first time. Not only a group of friends, but a group of escorts as well. It just sounds like there are too many pieces of a puzzle to manage - which takes away from the enjoyment and experience.

 

Not to sound like an ass but if I had hired someone and they ran off to do something like that, best damn believe I'd let them know through the door that it gets unlocked so the night can go on, or they all get their assets out - without compensation. To boot they were guests where you were staying, it was not their own place to jeopardize. Disrespect - that is one thing that irks me like no other. I've never stiffed anyone but if the person you've hired is clearly going off and doing his own thing then he is not doing what he was hired to do. Not to joke about the situation but you didn't ask for the cheating boyfriend experience.

 

My personal recommendation, should you decide to try it again - would be these. Note you actually did most of these already from the sounds of it, so good on you.

 

• Let them know your expectations upfront.
  
• Hire someone who is well reviewed for your first time*
  
• Make it an incall again so you're in your own comfort zone, so to speak.
  
• Don't try to do a group environment, it may sound fun but being new at the whole thing it introduces a complex dynamic - navigate the one on one first.
  
• Have fun!
  

 

*I am still considering it your first time because the events you had to endure doesn't sound like a first time anything to me. I'm sure some of the more season veterans could expand on that list above.

 

If you're with someone that is positively reviewed their attention will be on you. I've had a couple experiences where I felt like we were the only two people on earth. These experiences are the ones you will carry with you. If you have any questions, let me know. Next time you go to Montréal, NYC or Boston let me know, I'd be more than happy to point you in some decent directions. Depending on my travel schedule we may even be able to hit a couple strip clubs (I'm a recent strip club junkie).

 

Cheers!

[+ azdr0710]

sorry to hear all that....

 

gotta say the context of a bunch of older guys, a bunch of escorts, a vacation setting, alcohol, what-have-you was a recipe for disaster in trying to attain a "BFE" with your intended......I know you did try to tell him what you wanted.....not surprisingly, he was "enthu$ia$tic"

 

take some time off and hire a dude next time without so many other people involved!!

[jimboivyo]

sorry to hear all that....

 

gotta say the context of a bunch of older guys, a bunch of escorts, a vacation setting, alcohol, what-have-you was a recipe for disaster in trying to attain a "BFE" with your intended......I know you did try to tell him what you wanted.....not surprisingly, he was "enthusiastic"

 

take some time off and hire a dude next time without so many other people involved!!

 

 

agreed with all of this. with so many irons in the fire, how could things go right?

[+ WhamIAm]

Not to pile on, but I agree you had two fatal flaws -

1. Meeting up in a group setting.

2. Scheduling an overnight on your first time together.

 

I kinda did the first once -- had access to a large house in Vieques for a week, invited a guy whom I'd been with more than a couple of times down, then decided it would be a shame to waste the rest of the rooms. So, I invited another escort I'd spent time with (who was awesomely centered, a former EOY, and a big presence on these boards until he retired) to bring along a client of his). Told both gently that my intent was not a group situation sexually, just to allow all of us to enjoy the island. Both were respectful of my wishes (tho they told me beforehand they "met up for a cup of coffee to get to know each other a bit before the trip." My guess is there was more than coffee involved, which I found amusing. More power to them.)

 

Flip side, the guy I was with had a relapse on an alcohol problem during the trip. Nights were, well, him passing out drunk. I didn't send him packing given our longer term relationship and that I was worried about him. He did figure out he had a problem and went into rehab pretty much as soon as we got back, has been sober for a year since the trip. So, in one way I'm glad I didn't toss him. I think expressing my hurt, anger and concern contributed to him making that leap.

 

Short moral of that fable -- even with guys you know, things can go to shit. Try to shake it off and move on.

 

IMHO, second point is more important from my perspective -- NEVER do an overnight the first session. You've got no idea how compatible you are with the escort or how attentive he is to your needs. A bad match can lead to a night that is torturous, lonely, unsatisfying or all of the above. I like to establish regular relationships, but won't do an overnight or invite a guy to my home until we've spent a couple of sessions together.

 

My two cents, take it or leave it. Just try again with someone well-reviewed for an hour or two on the first meet. You can always set up for an hour and suggest that if you're both having fun you go for extra innings.

 

Again, don't let this deter you from finding someone attentive to your needs. It's just a fact of life that there are a number of thorns among the roses.

 

Happy hunting -- Wham

[mike carey]

I agree that having an overnight as a first meeting is a risk, but I haven't regretted one. So far.

[Jbdesc]

Not to pile on, but I agree you had two fatal flaws -

1. Meeting up in a group setting.

2. Scheduling an overnight on your first time together.

 

I kinda did the first once -- had access to a large house in Vieques for a week, invited a guy whom I'd been with more than a couple of times down, then decided it would be a shame to waste the rest of the rooms. So, I invited another escort I'd spent time with (who was awesomely centered, a former EOY, and a big presence on these boards until he retired) to bring along a client of his). Told both gently that my intent was not a group situation sexually, just to allow all of us to enjoy the island. Both were respectful of my wishes (tho they told me beforehand they "met up for a cup of coffee to get to know each other a bit before the trip." My guess is there was more than coffee involved, which I found amusing. More power to them.)

 

Flip side, the guy I was with had a relapse on an alcohol problem during the trip. Nights were, well, him passing out drunk. I didn't send him packing given our longer term relationship and that I was worried about him. He did figure out he had a problem and went into rehab pretty much as soon as we got back, has been sober for a year since the trip. So, in one way I'm glad I didn't toss him. I think expressing my hurt, anger and concern contributed to him making that leap.

 

Short moral of that fable -- even with guys you know, things can go to shit. Try to shake it off and move on.

 

IMHO, second point is more important from my perspective -- NEVER do an overnight the first session. You've got no idea how compatible you are with the escort or how attentive he is to your needs. A bad match can lead to a night that is torturous, lonely, unsatisfying or all of the above. I like to establish regular relationships, but won't do an overnight or invite a guy to my home until we've spent a couple of sessions together.

 

My two cents, take it or leave it. Just try again with someone well-reviewed for an hour or two on the first meet. You can always set up for an hour and suggest that if you're both having fun you go for extra innings.

 

Again, don't let this deter you from finding someone attentive to your needs. It's just a fact of life that there are a number of thorns among the roses.

 

Happy hunting -- Wham

Ooooo I love Vieques, and Culebra..

[Rudynate]

You couldn't make a better choice than Eric. This is experience talking.

[Decatur Guy]

Dude, I hate that happened to you. I've been hiring off and on for a decade now, and you tried one thing I've never done: the group party. And you tried something I've only done once: the overnight.

 

Seriously, that is fraught with all kinds of issues you learned about the hard way. Trust me, that's not how it usually goes down. Next time, do a two-hour session:

 

First 20 minutes for talking, etc. Then you ease into the session and still leave yourself more than an hour for the real fun stuff. Do a one-on-one.

[NowOrNever]

I wish y'all had been there with me when I decided to make my first hire an overnight group-setting experience! I was thinking with my little head rather than the one on my shoulders, I suppose. You guys could have set me straight before I messed up.

 

In my defense, I had met the escort beforehand and spoken to him for more than 30 minutes. We seemed like a good match. And he had been recommended to me by someone I knew, so that helped persuade me. I just had no idea that he would turn out to be unprofessional (IMHO), or worse, that one of my own friends would decide to have sex with him during my overnight date.

 

Some of the other guys (clients and escorts) felt that I should have stayed quiet and not broken off with my escort over his "infidelity," because it put a damper on the rest of the night, but most people understood my reaction and decision to call things off after he had had sex with other people during our time together.

 

Forget about the escort, who was a flake. I am MORE annoyed at my friend, Steve, who ran off with my date that night to have sex with him. Steve KNEW it was my first time hiring, he KNEW I was already very nervous about the entire situation, and he HAD HIS OWN ESCORT RIGHT THERE AT THE HOUSE, so why go after mine? At first Steve claimed he was not responsible because he was drunk, but later confessed to another guest that he had simply wanted to have sex with my date because he was too hot to resist. (And yes, Steve was one of the attendees who felt I should have just kept my mouth shut and not broken things off with my date. He said the night ended up badly because I overreacted.)

 

Anyway, I will try to hire again. I'm not going to let one bad experience prevent me from having fun for the rest of my life. I know from reading these forums that there are many great escorts out there, and many clients end up having wonderful experiences with them. I just have to choose better next time, and keep the escort strictly to myself!

 

I'm in Montreal right now, so I'm leaning towards hiring Gabriel Clark, who is gorgeous and well regarded by the members here.

 

Thanks for the support and encouragement, everyone!!!

[DonaldTramp]

Sounds like you should dump Steve as your friend.

[NowOrNever]

Sounds like you should dump Steve as your friend.

 

We hang out with many of the same people, so technically I will continue to see him in group settings, but that's all. Having sex with the escort I had chosen for my first hire is like having sex with your sister's date on prom night: not conducive to a continuing, positive relationship.

[tennisjock]

Wow so sorry to hear about yr first experience. To add my two cents..find better friends. Don't do group settings at least meet a guy for a hour or two session at least twice before you overnight and be very clear on what yr expectations are. There are a lot of wonderful guys out there.. on your wish list of whom to be with. Start end and finish with Gabriel Clark..see some of his movies in action on man surfer.com. Omg that guy loves loves sex

[tennisjock]

We hang out with many of the same people, so technically I will continue to see him in group settings, but that's all. Having sex with the escort I had chosen for my first hire is like having sex with your sister's date on prom night: not conducive to a continuing, positive relationship.

Steve is a skank... he knew it was yr first time etc and he should have been more sensitive to your needs or at least wait to hook up with yr guy until after the weekend and on his own sep time.

[+ WhamIAm]

I'm in Montreal right now, so I'm leaning towards hiring Gabriel Clark, who is gorgeous and well regarded by the members here.

 

Do. This. Now.

 

He's awesome. All else will quickly be forgotten.

[NowOrNever]

Wow so sorry to hear about yr first experience. To add my two cents..find better friends. Don't do group settings at least meet a guy for a hour or two session at least twice before you overnight and be very clear on what yr expectations are. There are a lot of wonderful guys out there.. on your wish list of whom to be with. Start end and finish with Gabriel Clark..see some of his movies in action on man surfer.com. Omg that guy loves loves sex

 

Thank God I do have better friends. Steve will just continue to be a member of the group I hang out with rather than a friend, if that makes sense. It's not that I'm one to hold a grudge, but I just don't care to invest personal time or energy into someone lacking integrity and sensitivity.

 

Gabriel Clark sure does appear to love sex in his films, but I realize that is part of his screen persona. I'm more intrigued by the stellar comments he has received from members of these forums. It looks like he loves sex in real life with clients too. He's definitely at the top of my list. Since I never ended up having sex with the other escort, I will consider Gabriel my first real escort experience.

[NowOrNever]

Steve is a skank... he knew it was yr first time etc and he should have been more sensitive to your needs or at least wait to hook up with yr guy until after the weekend and on his own sep time.

 

I agree. Of course I don't own exclusive rights to an escort's time, but I had hired this one for the night, and Steve knew it. He also had his own escort in the house, a young man he had been seeing regularly, so deciding to play with my date was unnecessary and selfish for multiple reasons.

[NowOrNever]

Do. This. Now.

 

He's awesome. All else will quickly be forgotten.

 

Well, this is intriguing. You sound extremely certain of your prediction!!!