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I'm At One Of The Local Bear Bars -Sigh!!

Gar1eth

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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Being the rare and acquired taste that I am, the only attention I've received (aside from the bartender taking my beer order) is one Grrr from someone who is also here from the Growlr (bear) app. Unfortunately I can't actually find him in the bar, and even if I did, we are both tops. :mad:

 

My only hope, and I'm not going to bet the farm on it is that older, bald, chubby bears get more attractive at closing time. :(:confused:o_O

 

Gman

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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Bears like to Hibernate, so give it time Gman.... (and have a few more drinks !)

 

Sigh-it didn't work. I talked to the very cute door guy (an extremely handsome burly bearish rugby-player looking guy type)for a while. It was pathetic of me to talk.

 

After I finished bothering the door guy, I peeked at another gay bar around the corner. When I came back to the original bar, a significant amount of people had left. The remaining few, those happy few, did not pay anymore attention to me than did the masses that had been there earlier.

 

To simplify things in my original post, I did leave out mentioning one guy I knew. I've talked about him before. He's the guy I met thru an app who got freaked out when I revealed information I had found out about him. We'll call him Frank. Frank got over his squeamishness about me knowing his name and his occupation.

 

I thought to begin with he was a really nice guy. The guy is enamored with my tallywacker. He loves to go down on me. But all is not perfect in paradise. He usually only feels the urge when he's stinking drunk. Plus when we 1st started meeting he had a new boyfriend whom he now refers to as his 'man'. He told me they were in an open relationship. That's not my favorite place to be-an occasional something on the side. But I was horny, and Frank is a great kisser.

 

So Frank saw me at the club. He was with someone. I don't know if it was just a friend or his 'man'. He didn't say anything to me. And I didn't try to force myself on him.

 

So to summarize, the majority of the crowd ignored me passively. Frank ignored me actively (i.e., he definitely saw me and knew me-he did a kind of head nod acknowledgement but didn't speak to me.

 

The evening wasn't a total loss. Around the corner from the club situated in front of another club, was a stand with a guy grilling hot dogs. I had a hot link with onions served on a bun with mayonnaise . It was only $5. It was delicious!!!

 

And probably just as well no one came on to me. It would have been so unexpected who knows if my old ticker could have handled it.

 

 

Gman

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jjkrkwood Grand Master

jjkrkwood

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Gman, I am again sensing negativity from you. Every sentence in post #3 screams negative and insecure (except when you mention that you have a nice "tallywacker". that didnt go unnoticed by me)

 

Anyway, what I am trying to say is that, could it be that the negative attitude you approach things with "manifests" itself in a disappointing result. ? People can sense your mood and attitude, and it usually drives the situation. Unless you are a horribly ugly, smelly, disfigured Troll (which I know you arent) there is no fucking reason that you cant meet the people

you want, in the very least, for conversation. Being there was the first step. now take it a bit farther, SMILE and look open and inviting (and wear a pretty outfit, Always)

 

If all else fails..... "Pull out that impressive tallywacker"..... :p:p:p

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Truereview Grand Master

+ Truereview

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Gman, I am again sensing negativity from you. Every sentence in post #3 screams negative and insecure (except when you mention that you have a nice "tallywacker". that didnt go unnoticed by me)

 

Anyway, what I am trying to say is that, could it be that the negative attitude you approach things with "manifests" itself in a disappointing result. ? People can sense your mood and attitude, and it usually drives the situation. Unless you are a horribly ugly, smelly, disfigured Troll (which I know you arent) there is no fucking reason that you cant meet the people

you want, in the very least, for conversation. Being there was the first step. now take it a bit farther, SMILE and look open and inviting (and wear a pretty outfit, Always)

 

If all else fails..... "Pull out that impressive tallywacker"..... :p:p:p

My dear Marge, do you think for a second Gman doesn't know what he is doing? Please, girl! Just like I can count on you to dispense tough love left and right, I fully expect Gman to post his sex or romantic adventures with a self-deprecating or pessimistic tone. The first few times I read this type of posts, I got all caught up in it until I realized that Gman gives voice to the fears of (many) other silent members in our forum. His "negative" tone serves a bigger purpose. He makes himself vulnerable to help others be heard - that's a true mensch in my book. By the way, your inevitable tough love dispensation serves an equally good purpose - you probably know why. All this to say, Gman doesn't need a sermon or tough love on the obvious. Gman just needs us to listen and be there for him when he makes himself vulnerable - regardless of how much it unnerves some of us.

 

Now, bc I have a crystal ball in my hands and I can predict the future, I'm turning my other ass cheek so you can slap me silly. Mwah! -TR

 

PS - Gman, you always manage to touch me deeply. thank you.

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jjkrkwood Grand Master

jjkrkwood

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My dear Marge, do you think for a second Gman doesn't know what he is doing? Please, girl! Just like I can count on you to dispense tough love left and right, I fully expect Gman to post his sex or romantic adventures with a self-deprecating or pessimistic tone. The first few times I read this type of posts, I got all caught up in it until I realized that Gman gives voice to the fears of (many) other silent members in our forum. His "negative" tone serves a bigger purpose. He makes himself vulnerable to help others be heard - that's a true mensch in my book. By the way, your inevitable tough love dispensation serves an equally good purpose - you probably know why. All this to say, Gman doesn't need a sermon or tough love on the obvious. Gman just needs us to listen and be there for him when he makes himself vulnerable - regardless of how much it unnerves some of us.

 

Now, bc I have a crystal ball in my hands and I can predict the future, I'm turning my other ass cheek so you can slap me silly. Mwah! -TR

 

PS - Gman, you always manage to touch me deeply. thank you.

 

 

Trudy, True All dat, but its a fine-line from being vulnerable and self-deprecating, to just becoming depressing and Debbie Downer.... Some schtick just gets Old. (like my "serial posting" as one member here referred to it) We've heard the same ole stuff from Gman over and over, so my suggestion was to simply "flip the switch" and try something different. It was in no way intended to demean or belittle him. It was all constructive in intent. We all feel adequate in some ways, and all fear the unknown in the social pool, but come on girl....with a negative attitude and expectation you are bound to Fail ! I can only forgive you IF you allow me to "rub your crystal balls" ;)

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nycman Grand Master

+ nycman

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The guy is enamored with my tallywacker.

He loves to go down on me.

But all is not perfect in paradise.

He usually only feels the urge when he's stinking drunk.

 

Jack Daniels to the rescue.....

 

Seriously....that's why God made shots!

 

He told me they were in an open relationship.

That's not my favorite place to be-an occasional something on the side.

 

"But you are, Blanche! You are....!"

 

But I was horny, and Frank is a great kisser.

 

You DIRTY little home wrecking SLUT!

 

Welcome to the club!

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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Gman, I am again sensing negativity from you. Every sentence in post #3 screams negative and insecure (except when you mention that you have a nice "tallywacker". that didnt go unnoticed by me)

 

Anyway, what I am trying to say is that, could it be that the negative attitude you approach things with "manifests" itself in a disappointing result. ? People can sense your mood and attitude, and it usually drives the situation. Unless you are a horribly ugly, smelly, disfigured Troll (which I know you arent) there is no fucking reason that you cant meet the people

you want, in the very least, for conversation. Being there was the first step. now take it a bit farther, SMILE and look open and inviting (and wear a pretty outfit, Always)

 

If all else fails..... "Pull out that impressive tallywacker"..... :p:p:p

 

You are both right... And wrong, JJK. While I am depressed, it's not like I go to a bar and stand or sit all hunched over holding my hand in front of my face ( Palm facing away from me) screaming, "I'm miserable-don't talk to me!!!" Or sitting there with a hoodie draped over my head.

 

I don't know the bars, if any, you go to. But most of the ones I've ever been to-and I'm talking about back in college too almost everyone is there with someone. Sure some singles do well like beautiful women and studly guys. Basically everyone I saw at the bar last night-and this is not an enormous place-it's occupancy is only 90-came in with someone else-or went almost immediately to talk to someone on entering. These places are like being back in high school or college. We move in packs. There was one guy I observed for about 30 minutes who I thought was cute who didn't seem to be saying a word to anyone. I almost went over and talked with him. But he left before I got a chance.

 

My dear Marge, do you think for a second Gman doesn't know what he is doing? Please, girl! Just like I can count on you to dispense tough love left and right, I fully expect Gman to post his sex or romantic adventures with a self-deprecating or pessimistic tone.

 

You write as if you knew me-in all my dark despair.

 

The first few times I read this type of posts, I got all caught up in it until I realized that Gman gives voice to the fears of (many) other silent members in our forum. His "negative" tone serves a bigger purpose. He makes himself vulnerable to help others be heard - that's a true mensch in my book.

PS - Gman, you always manage to touch me deeply. thank you.

 

I think you give me too much credit, sir. I don't think that my goals are that lofty. I'm only telling the truth as I see it. I'm made brave by the anonymity of the Forum although I've met a few of you. Although come to think of it aside from Daddy and several escorts, I think the few Forumites I knew are now no longer active.

 

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the appellation 'mensch'. But I don't think I'm worthy at all.

 

Gman

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jjkrkwood Grand Master

jjkrkwood

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Gman, I dont go to bars... I'm a 65 year old man and dont feel its appropriate for ME to peddle my wares at a bar, usually most frequented by yungins that think i am OLD. But that's just my feeling for ME.... So please dont say I am contradictory in my advice I give to you. I was just trying to help (in my own JJ way)

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corndog Community Regular

corndog

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In my experience, "bar cruising" has become a lost art. I don't think that many people meet and hookup in bars anymore. Grindr and the rest of the hookup apps have replaced the cruisy bars that used to be a staple in the gay subculture. It's sad, but I'm afraid it's true.

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Gar1eth Grand Master

+ Gar1eth

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In my experience, "bar cruising" has become a lost art. I don't think that many people meet and hookup in bars anymore. Grindr and the rest of the hookup apps have replaced the cruisy bars that used to be a staple in the gay subculture. It's sad, but I'm afraid it's true.

 

Well and then we have the hook-up apps. 99.9 % of the guys I've hooked up with I've had to be the pursuer. And my success rate is dismal. I won't say that no one ever approaches me 1st. I will say that very few do. And of those few, about 85% of them are not guys I'm attracted to-and @jjkrkwood would most likely say, "Obviously you aren't going to like them if they want you because that doesn't fit into your depressive scenario." But I swear that's not true. This isn't a Groucho complex of me not wanting those who find me attractive. That 85% is made up of guys that are my size or more. And while you don't have to be a star (baby), to be in my show, I'm not really attracted to guys my size or larger. But they don't have to be incredibly smaller, even 20 pounds lighter I'm sometimes attracted too. The next 10% invariably live 500- to 5000 miles away (I'm apparently in great demand in Latin America). The last 5% I'm not attracted to for miscellaneous reasons. Oh and when I talk about receiving texts, let me assure you we are not talking horses. I was probably lucky to get 3 or 4 shout outs over the last three weeks.

 

Hey, speak of the devil. While I'm writing this, I just received a notice from someone named "Chubs" on Growlr. Hold on a minute while I see what he wants....ok it's a guy from about 15 miles away in a neighboring city. He's 22, 6'2" and 317 #. He seems like a nice enough fellow. But he's not my type.

 

Gman

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rvwnsd Grand Master

rvwnsd

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Gman, I find your self-deprecating language to be quite endearing. My guess (and you confirmed it) is you are conveying your thoughts, emotions, and fears to us here on the Forum and presenting differently when you are out and about. That's what is great about this forum! It is a safe pace to do that.

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jjkrkwood Grand Master

jjkrkwood

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Well and then we have the hook-up apps. 99.9 % of the guys I've hooked up with I've had to be the pursuer. And my success rate is dismal. I won't say that no one ever approaches me 1st. I will say that very few do. And of those few, about 85% of them are not guys I'm attracted to-and @jjkrkwood would most likely say, "Obviously you aren't going to like them if they want you because that doesn't fit into your depressive scenario." But I swear that's not true. This isn't a Groucho complex of me not wanting those who find me attractive. That 85% is made up of guys that are my size or more. And while you don't have to be a star (baby), to be in my show, I'm not really attracted to guys my size or larger. But they don't have to be incredibly smaller, even 20 pounds lighter I'm sometimes attracted too. The next 10% invariably live 500- to 5000 miles away (I'm apparently in great demand in Latin America). The last 5% I'm not attracted to for miscellaneous reasons. Oh and when I talk about receiving texts, let me assure you we are not talking horses. I was probably lucky to get 3 or 4 shout outs over the last three weeks.

 

Hey, speak of the devil. While I'm writing this, I just received a notice from someone named "Chubs" on Growlr. Hold on a minute while I see what he wants....ok it's a guy from about 15 miles away in a neighboring city. He's 22, 6'2" and 317 #. He seems like a nice enough fellow. But he's not my type.

 

Gman

 

 

Lol Gman, I knew that was the outcome even WITHOUT my crystal ball.... I think that if you sit around and wait for your exact type to contact you, it will be a very looooong wait. ?

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Truereview Grand Master

+ Truereview

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The gypsy-cum-punk look doesn't suit you, wawa-boy. Try: Auburn-haired society matron on a pilgrimage to MVY.

close-up-chihuahua-wearing-diamond-collar-20376123.jpg

Martha, puhleez. I know how to bring flare to the occasion

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/01/08/article-2535767-1A7D477000000578-264_634x816.jpg

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José Soplanucas Grand Master

+ José Soplanucas

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Trudy, True All dat, but its a fine-line from being vulnerable and self-deprecating, to just becoming depressing and Debbie Downer.... Some schtick just gets Old. (like my "serial posting" as one member here referred to it) We've heard the same ole stuff from Gman over and over, so my suggestion was to simply "flip the switch" and try something different. It was in no way intended to demean or belittle him. It was all constructive in intent. We all feel adequate in some ways, and all fear the unknown in the social pool, but come on girl....with a negative attitude and expectation you are bound to Fail ! I can only forgive you IF you allow me to "rub your crystal balls" ;)

Marge, Trudy, Kessy, almost everyone here has a girlish nickname. I want my own, girls!

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Truereview Grand Master

+ Truereview

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Marge, Trudy, Kessy, almost everyone here has a girlish nickname. I want my own, girls!

Thy name shall be Prudence henceforth. Pruddy if you behave.

Now, stop sucking on that mate & sit on your cushion like a lady!

http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/a6/06/e7/a606e71793257b99b716909263a21b0b.jpg

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