End of life request

[+ TylerandAce]

I got an update today from him. He says doctors have put him on a morphine drip and his brother has moved in to take over day-to-day care. So, it looks like this won't be happening after all and we are too late. Wish we had been available immediately, but he lives about five hours driving time from us. It's a shame.

[+ Truereview]

Sobering. Sigh. May we all spend our last days surrounded by love, light, and the satisfaction of a well-lived life.

[liubit]

Sad, very sad indeed.

[MikeyGMin]

That's too bad. I have more experience with morphine drips than I wish. In all three cases they were after hospice had been called in and were meant to hasten the process. Pain control was important of course, and the official reason, but we all understood what was going on.

[+ TylerandAce]

I don't really know the guy except from his e-mails (that have become more difficult to understand over these few days) but it has somewhat cast a pall on the house now. Sad for sure.

[geminibear]

I got an update today from him. He says doctors have put him on a morphine drip and his brother has moved in to take over day-to-day care. So, it looks like this won't be happening after all and we are too late. Wish we had been available immediately, but he lives about five hours driving time from us. It's a shame.

That is sad news. Thanks guys for being open minded and making an attempt to bring some joy to someone else who wanted it.

 

Rub some dirt on it and hug it out.

[mike carey]

Well, you reached out and said you'd do it so massive props to you. It is indeed sad that it couldn't come to pass. Have you asked whether his brother was aware of his plan to meet you?

[Kuriousity]

Things go as they are supposed to go. I am a religious person, and do believe in the existence of God....and I believe that you were supposed to not meet up because you were meant to have this end of Life discussion.

[bigvalboy]

Well the morphine drip means things are winding down. It's too bad you didn't live closer. It would be nice to have dropped in to see him, and to chat for a few minutes. It might have made his day.

 

But God bless you guys for putting yourself out there. Your efforts will not go unrewarded. Confronting death on any level is a difficult proposition. Most people don't fully understand the process. Thanks for the thread and putting this conversation in the open.

[mike carey]

because you were meant to have this end of Life discussion.

And we were meant to be involved in it.

[Kuriousity]

And we were meant to be involved in it.

 

Precisely.

[+ Funguy]

Any thought of doing a deed and popping in just to say hello (if he is conscious)?

[bigvalboy]

Wish we had been available immediately, but he lives about five hours driving time from us. It's a shame.

 

Any thought of doing a deed and popping in just to say hello (if he is conscious)?

 

5 hours is a bit of a haul...Would have been nice if he were closer.

[+ TylerandAce]

Any thought of doing a deed and popping in just to say hello (if he is conscious)?

The last line of his message said something to the effect that we shouldn't contact in any way because his brother is taking over communicating for him and he wouldn't understand. That made me even sadder knowing he was dying with such massive secrets.

[+ Funguy]

Now, that's understandable and way, way too bad!

Good luck to you two guys for your efforts. You've racked up a few points!

[+ TylerandAce]

Ha....Well, thanks. Crowns in heaven, as my mother would say?!?! Lol.

Not sure this qualifies but we won't turn down points.

[wisconsinguy]

It warms my heart that you guys were thinking about meeting up with this gentleman. For whatever reasons he wanted to meet, I'm sure you would have given it your all. I have been an RN for almost 43 years. I still practice, some weeks fulltime. My practice revolved around critical care most of that time, except for the last 17 years. During these last years, it has been taking care of babies and infants in the home. Almost all of them medically fragile, and usually on ventilators. Taking care of dying patients and their families is part of what I do. I have learned so many valuable life lessons from these patients, their friends and family. I am a list person, and there were a few things that came to mind when reading this mans circumstances, and the thoughts of the many that responded.

1) When all the therapies have been exhausted, or a patient decides that, "enough is enough" discontinues therapy, they usually still want to be part of life. The emotions are wide and varied as you can imagine.

2) They are concerned about their comfort. Having people around that can assure them that they will be watchful of that adds degrees of comfort alone.

3) We need to mindful of our feelings about death and dying. It can be frightful, and many times we are at a loss for words...all of which are normal.

4) The mere presence of a caring person cannot be overstated.

Before I ramble more, thanks to you guys again for trying to help.

[+ TylerandAce]

Thanks for that Wisconsinguy. It takes a special person to dedicate their life to easing people through this hardest of transitions. It must be powerful to be part of it. I couldn't imagine the emotional fortitude it would take to face it every day. Thank God there are folks like you. Thanks for the words of encouragement.

[LADoug1]

Remember too that you gave him the satisfaction that he was accepted by you and that you were eager to meet with him. You both were a wish come true.

[craigville beach]

The last line of his message said something to the effect that we shouldn't contact in any way because his brother is taking over communicating for him and he wouldn't understand. That made me even sadder knowing he was dying with such massive secrets.

 

 

No! there is no secret. He shared it with both of you because he wanted/needed to. You should never doubt him or yourself. What you did was what he wanted. You may feel that you didn't complete his request, but in a way you did. You responded to his request and were prepared to grant his request. You are both deserving of everyones respect.

[Becket]

There is certainly a lot of back and forth on this site regarding escorts. I know I've done my share. But this post reminds me that escorts provide a necessary service--more than that--offer a generous gift of their time and talents to those who would otherwise go without. I have been lucky to know a few of the guys as my friends, and their friendship means more to me as time, and my gorgeous looks (haha) pass. I think it's so cool someone wanted to experience a bit of magic with whatever time he had left. Anyway, thumbs up to the boys. (I remember the joy I felt the first time I found this site or the rentboy sites and thinking, 'good gracious, I may just get laid again.')

[+ TylerandAce]

ha...well, it's not something we take lightly. We know that ever encounter was preceded by lots of life decisions that brought them to us. We try hard to accept people as they are, listen to their needs, and be something they've always wanted, even if it's just for a short time. We both know what it's like to have been uncomfortable in our own skins, so when you find your place, along with acceptance, the experience can be very profound for all involved.

[down_to_business]

I believe that even though it didn't happen, that he got to fantasize and think about that there was a real possibility that it would and that allowed him to forget about the bad things even if only for a few moments. That had to make a difference.

 

I know if I had to go, I can't think of a much better way than sandwiched between Tyler and Ace.

[+ TylerandAce]

We hope you are right and would like to think the idea of it did make a difference for him. Thank you very much

[mike carey]

We hope you are right and would like to think the idea of it did make a difference for him. Thank you very much

I'm sure he is right. I started out with a few random hookups, never really satisfying, and I'm nervous about any encounter. Hiring was a big step, one for which I wish I had had the advantage of reading this forum before I launched into it. Planning a hire, contacting an escort, arranging a meet are all empowering. Hell, even chatting with escorts in here is because there is a subtext that doesn't exist when talking to other clients. It means I want to meet an escort (not necessarily every one I chat with), and I am doing something I want to do. Whether it is simple intimacy, or a mindblowing pounding that will result, even the planning is fulfilling a need. I was on tenterhooks before a meeting last month, nervous as hell, but the anticipation was part of it all. I considered, but [maybe] nerves prevented me from any spur of the moment hires in DC. I'm still learning, but you two gave this man something to think about, to plan and to hope for. That is no small matter.