LivingnLA Posted April 24, 2018 Share Posted April 24, 2018 teach me guys, but is seeking arrangements actually about seeking an arrangement, i mean it has a section where you can put how much allowance you can give and how much allowance your seeking. Yet every previous offer has been just guys wanting to take me out on just dates/hanging out and being my boyfriend... which defeats the purpose really as i would still have to escort... lol. I don't know maybe I'm doing something wrong:oops: Like if you even talk about an arrangement in the first date does the allowance come at the end of each month, what happens if the guy sneakily leaves you before the end of the month. I dunno things are just so vague no one gives me a direct answer when I did go on these "dates" back in the day, they always just got mad at talking about the allowance but they were not shy about talking about wanting free sex on the first date :rolleyes::eek:. I like rentmen and those other escorts sites because its clear what each party wants and theirs no back and forth [uSER=12155]@Dominiking[/uSER], I think it all depends. Nearly every guy I've spoken to so far--about ten--have been pretty clear during our chats on SA about what they're looking for and what they offer. One guy I may meet in a couple weeks, is from out of town, fits one of my specific kinks almost exactly (which was very easy to search for on SA), and basically, I'm paying for some time with him. The guy I'm meeting tonight, is a fairly well known instagram fitness person and the scenario we'll be exploring will cover multiple sessions, which we'll agree to tonight. I hope. The third guy, seems also more transactional. In my incredibly limited experience, the guys who want monthly allowances--at least around here--are pricey and some-what unrealistic, but given the vast sums of money in this region, I'm not surprised that some top-tier "arm candy" gets a multi-grand monthly allowance to "hang around" like just another friend, albeit one much younger, fitter, and hotter than most. MikeBiDude and + Keith30309 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ Keith30309 Posted April 24, 2018 Share Posted April 24, 2018 teach me guys, but is seeking arrangements actually about seeking an arrangement, i mean it has a section where you can put how much allowance you can give and how much allowance your seeking. Yet every previous offer has been just guys wanting to take me out on just dates/hanging out and being my boyfriend... which defeats the purpose really as i would still have to escort... lol. I don't know maybe I'm doing something wrong:oops: Like if you even talk about an arrangement in the first date does the allowance come at the end of each month, what happens if the guy sneakily leaves you before the end of the month. I dunno things are just so vague no one gives me a direct answer when I did go on these "dates" back in the day, they always just got mad at talking about the allowance but they were not shy about talking about wanting free sex on the first date :rolleyes::eek:. I like rentmen and those other escorts sites because its clear what each party wants and theirs no back and forth I think everyone has a different way of looking at this. I try to think more about the long game. I want to establish an arrangement with someone with whom I share some chemistry and have a real, sincere connection... one which organically includes physical intimacy. These are my friends and I like to give my friends gifts. There are a handful for guys (about 5) who I consider intimate friends and we share certain benefits with each other. It’s not a “leave the envelope on the dresser after 2 hours and walk away”sort of thing for me. I used to take one guy’s sister to the grocery store. But I’ve had some really, really good times with them and, I think, they with me. These arrangements are difficult to establish and means taking some risk but it’s worth it to me, in part, exactly because it’s NOT quite so transactional and predictably routine as an escort encounter. What makes it especially difficult is that many of these guys are looking for an arrangement because they are in dire need of financial help immediately. Conversely, some have little need for financial assistance but desire some guidance and intimacy from an older man. I’ve met guys from all points along the spectrum. It takes patience, trust and sometimes a leap of faith and I’ve made mistakes but they’re outweighed by the positive experiences I’ve had. I’m seeing a handful of guys I met via SA regularly now and consider every one a good friend. I hope one man’s perspective on this is helpful. LivingnLA, MikeBiDude, AlexMass2004 and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeBiDude Posted May 29, 2018 Share Posted May 29, 2018 *Seeking Arrangements Warning!* Just kidding, got your attention. The heads up is that there are always tons of fresh faces on Seeking this time of year as students return home or travel for their summer breaks. Be sure and check the “Newest Members” tab on the SA home page frequently...here in SoCal there are new faces/profiles daily. Enjoy the prospecting. To a lesser degree I’m seeing the same on Grindr. pubic_assistance, + nycman, LivingnLA and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingnLA Posted May 30, 2018 Share Posted May 30, 2018 *Seeking Arrangements Warning!* Just kidding, got your attention. The heads up is that there are always tons of fresh faces on Seeking this time of year as students return home or travel for their summer breaks. Be sure and check the “Newest Members” tab on the SA home page frequently...here in SoCal there are new faces/profiles daily. Enjoy the prospecting. To a lesser degree I’m seeing the same on Grindr. Very true, my dance card is currently full, so I doubt I'll avail myself of any of those fresh faces. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted May 30, 2018 Share Posted May 30, 2018 there are always tons of fresh faces on Seeking this time of year Indeed. I think I got over 200 messages last week alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kko123 Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 Could we review some of the successful boys or is that less appropriate in this case? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ freecahill1965 Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 Could we review some of the successful boys or is that less appropriate in this case? It would be interesting. I wonder if any of them just want to provide escorts services or do they really want relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ Keith30309 Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 Could we review some of the successful boys or is that less appropriate in this case? Great question.... I think that reviewing someone's companionship who isn't overtly "advertising" for such would be a pretty big invasion of privacy. That said, a small percentage of the SA guys I've met are escorting in everything except name. (This excludes those who also have active profiles on RentMen as "Porn stars".) I have casually asked two of them if they would be interested in meeting other guys who may have similar interests as me (thinking about a couple of Forum members) and both said no. End of discussion. I think it's a big leap to go from the relative safety of Seekingarrangement and screening that occurs to the wild wild west of escorting and the many unknowns that entails. MikeBiDude, + freecahill1965, + José Soplanucas and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ José Soplanucas Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 You find a very diverse array of arrangements, from guys just looking for sex, sometimes escorts, to guys looking for a daddy to get married. I got two "long" lasting relationships. One was a boy who was actually into older guys, and was open to have a committed relationship if the things flew in that direction. The other one is a boy who just like sex and fun and making a few dollars (very few) in the process. MikeBiDude, + Keith30309 and + goosh69 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ goosh69 Posted June 13, 2018 Share Posted June 13, 2018 If they want people to hear about them online, they’ll post an ad on an escort site. pubic_assistance 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kko123 Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 It would be interesting. I wonder if any of them just want to provide escorts services or do they really want relationships. Yes the small handful I've met are knowingly advertising 'escort lite' prepared to engage the full spectrum of BFE activities and earn their mutually agreed upon rewards at the end of the date. Little talk of or interest in full-on relationships beyond regularly scheduled rendezvous of wine, chat, and sex. One guy I met recently was a pedantic chatter over glasses of wine until I insisted we put his mouth to better use! Such succulent lips. Imagine my pleasure to discover he had not one, but two gorgeous pink puckers to enjoy! When slipping him his gift at the end, I asked if I could offer a review of his tight sugar talents he seemed mystified by what that could mean but I assured him it'd just mean more daddies at his candy store to which he seemed bemused and pleased. But perhaps it's best to assume that such reviews for the young gents be kept discreet and private, though the SA site does insist one use an alias rather than proper name. We could argue that there would be little compromise to the integrity of the guys on there, especially when plenty seem to be offering and engaging in a similar manner to "official" escorts... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ José Soplanucas Posted June 14, 2018 Share Posted June 14, 2018 If anyone just dropped in this thread and is considering SA, you should go to my blog and type "seeking arrangement" in the search box. You will have a few tips there. + freecahill1965, MikeBiDude, + glutes and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 It would be interesting. I wonder if any of them just want to provide escorts services or do they really want relationships. After a year on S.A. I can break it down into three major groups. Guys who are escorting or trying out the Pay4play scene. Guys who are truly looking to be cared for by an older man. Guys who saw the ad and joined with NO clue about how it all works. jcmiami1, MikeBiDude, + freecahill1965 and 5 others 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ freecahill1965 Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 After a year on S.A. I can break it down into three major groups. Guys who are escorting or trying out the Pay4play scene. Guys who are truly looking to be cared for by an older man. Guys who saw the ad and joined with NO clue about how it all works. Is there any characteristics of their SA profile that helps to differentiate each grouping? marylander1940 and kko123 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeBiDude Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 After a year on S.A. I can break it down into three major groups. Guys who are escorting or trying out the Pay4play scene. Guys who are truly looking to be cared for by an older man. Guys who saw the ad and joined with NO clue about how it all works. Well summarized! pubic_assistance 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marylander1940 Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 Brilliant @pubic_assistance and you still have the coolest SN on here! After a year on S.A. I can break it down into three major groups. Guys who are escorting or trying out the Pay4play scene. What's the difference between an escort (category above) and a sugar daddy/kept man relationship (category below)? Aren't escort$ more honest? Are kept men/boys simply looking for a free place, food, college tuition, etc.? Guys who are truly looking to be cared for by an older man. Guys who saw the ad and joined with NO clue about how it all works. I'm sure this is the majority. pubic_assistance and + glutes 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ goosh69 Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 (edited) Brilliant @pubic_assistance and you still have the coolest SN on here! What's the difference between an escort (category above) and a sugar daddy/kept man relationship (category below)? Aren't escort$ more honest? Are kept men/boys simply looking for a free place, food, college tuition, etc.? I'm sure this is the majority. You MUST know the difference between a kept man and an escort . One will accept quasi- or full monogamy in exchange for long term monetary security, the other is purely transactional. And in some cases, having money is a turn on or at least desirable for the sugar baby, no more or less than looks or race or height or any of the other superficial things gay men seek. Edited June 16, 2018 by goosh69 marylander1940, pubic_assistance and Bertster 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 Is there any characteristics of their SA profile that helps to differentiate each grouping? Like colors in the rainbow...there are a lot of different stories and strategies. My only method of rooting through - is conversation. Pay4play strategists are getting right to the point what do you want? / how much are you paying? Young men looking for an actual relationship will engage in long conversation to know about you and share information about themselves. The clueless boys will tell you they are broke And can you send money to their dorm room in Kansas. + goosh69 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ freecahill1965 Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 Like colors in the rainbow...there are a lot of different stories and strategies. My only method of rooting through - is conversation. Pay4play strategists are getting right to the point what do you want? / how much are you paying? Young men looking for an actual relationship will engage in long conversation to know about you and share information about themselves. The clueless boys will tell you they are broke And can you send money to their dorm room in Kansas. I do have an account. I do get messages but I have yet to answer one. Since I am just looking for very short term "companionship" is it rude just to get to the point. How does one go about making that point without being rude? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 I do have an account. I do get messages but I have yet to answer one. Since I am just looking for very short term "companionship" is it rude just to get to the point. How does one go about making that point without being rude? ASK what they are looking for first. Yes. Rude to ask them to escort if they are not there to escort. + goosh69 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ freecahill1965 Posted June 16, 2018 Share Posted June 16, 2018 ASK what they are looking for first. Yes. Rude to ask them to escort if they are not there to escort. If they are Pay4play, do they usually just get to the point? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted June 17, 2018 Share Posted June 17, 2018 (edited) If they are Pay4play, do they usually just get to the point? Well...again...you are talking about a broad spectrum of people here....isn't any standard that we can talk about using the word "usually". Edited June 17, 2018 by pubic_assistance + freecahill1965 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ Keith30309 Posted June 17, 2018 Share Posted June 17, 2018 PSA to those who use SA: it seems obvious but it may be helpful to remind the guys you have contact with to beware of scams. I spent yesterday afternoon with a new guy having some fun but the noteworthy thing was what he told me about being scammed. 1) He was contacted by a potential Sugar Daddy (SD) and talked into buying two iphone X's... around $2200... and then be reimbursed when they met. He gave the guy his Verizon account number to make payment and held the phones. A few days later he saw a payment appear on his Verizon account online and dutifully shipped the 2 phones to the guy. A couple of weeks later he received a letter from Verizon that the payment had been reversed (I assume it was a bad check) and he's now been placed for collections. 2) He was contacted by another SD and convinced to buy, over the course of 3 months, iTunes cards and the SD was to pay his credit card bill. He was told that the guy, who was in Africa (!!!) could sell the iTunes numbers at a profit and he would share it with the SB. He bought small increments of cards, giving the numbers to the SD, and his credit card bill was actually paid in full the first month. He bought larger quantities and the credit card bill payments stopped. Ultimately he said he was taken for $11k and has been placed for collections. These seem like incredibly stupid scams to have fallen for (especially more than once) but he, and some of the guys I meet, are naive, don't understand how credit works and eager to please a potential SD (in this guy's case it's compounded by the fact that English is his second language and he's in the US on a student visa). A friendly reminder may make a big difference in someone's life. + PapaTony, MikeBiDude and + glutes 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ glutes Posted June 17, 2018 Share Posted June 17, 2018 When I was on SA last year, two young men who I contacted flat out asked me in the beginning, "You aren't going to ask me for my checking account number, are you?" marylander1940 and MikeBiDude 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marylander1940 Posted June 17, 2018 Share Posted June 17, 2018 You MUST know the difference between a kept man and an escort . One will accept quasi- or full monogamy in exchange for long term monetary security, the other is purely transactional. And in some cases, having money is a turn on or at least desirable for the sugar baby, no more or less than looks or race or height or any of the other superficial things gay men seek. You should post this definition in the Urban Dictionary... Some on here, don't see it so clearly. Did you miss the reverse mortgage for escorts' thread? + goosh69 and + g56whiz 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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