Is it normal for escorts not to climax during the session?

[BrklynNYC]

I like seeing them climax before I do. But they seem intent on making me climax first and then say "it's not about me" and then session over. Is it acceptable to say beforehand that I wanna see them cum?

[calrichmond]

I guess I am not a nice person, but I only care about me climaxing. I am a top, so even if the escort doesn't get hard, I am not concerned. Several times I found out that the escort had other clients the day of our encounter, and the escort was required to top.

 

On the other side of the spectrum, I had one escort who came without touching himself while I was topping him. That was a turn on for me.

[down_to_business]

Some will try and save the "ammo" for the next 10 people they are going to see right after you or they have already shot their reserve from the 10 people they saw right before you (or maybe both). Have the discussion before hand if its important to you, but realize that you are at a serious disadvantage because many will claim they won't discuss such specifics because its entrapment yada yada yada. What I would do personally is this, let the escort know that it is important to you in your communication to them (once). When you see them in person, politely remind them (once) of how important that aspect is to you. If they don't deliver after that, simply never hire them again.

 

The most important thing to remember is what is important is what is important to YOU not what is important to others or what people tell you should be important to you.

[mike carey]

I would say that it is always about the client and whether they climaxed. Did the escort make you happy? For me, whether he climaxed is a second order issue, nice if it happens but nor critical. Others may differ!

[+ glennnn]

I like seeing them climax before I do. But they seem intent on making me climax first and then say "it's not about me" and then session over. Is it acceptable to say beforehand that I wanna see them cum?

 

With my two escort so far, I made sure they knew it was totally important to me (I have a need to service him kink). And explained it was his climax that triggered mine. No climax for him= no climax for me= frustration and fatigue for both of us

 

One agreed immediately and came through like a champ... or should I say a faucet. The other warned me he might not be able, but let me work on him until he did. Heaven!

 

In the first case, I did not climax, but certainly felt like I had. In the second case, I was the faucet. I agree with the advice above. I make my desire known emphatically from contact one and repeatedly remind him. It's worked so far. Good luck.

[geminibear]

I would say that it is always about the client and whether they climaxed. Did the escort make you happy? For me, whether he climaxed is a second order issue, nice if it happens but nor critical. Others may differ!

 

Part of what makes me happy as a top is having the guy climax while I am topping him. That pushes me over the top, to feel that tension in him while I'm in him. To know I did that. I guess its a control thing.

[Rudynate]

It's odd, but I don't care whether either of us orgasm. It takes me so long to get it off that I get tired of trying. It is nice if he gets it off because I enjoy swallowing his load, but it doesn't ruin it for me if he doesn't. If we've had a lively romp otherwise, orgasm isn't that important.

[Wolfer]

I want both of us to cum. Getting the other guy off is just so hot. And also like the often uncontrollable moaning in ecstacy they do when cumming. I like that an orgasm is always real with genuine pleasure for him.

[+ Gar1eth]

It's odd, but I don't care whether either of us orgasm. It takes me so long to get it off that I get tired of trying.

 

If it's not too personal, may I ask if you trained yourself to that or have you always been that way? I'm at the other end of the spectrum unfortunately. I've always been amazed at how much stimulation some escorts can take without orgasming when I would have cum long before.

 

As for the the OP's question-I like to see when the guy orgasms. I especially like it if they can orgasm while I'm topping them. But I understand it's not always possible. #1 not all guys can cum while being topped. #2. Possibly they can while being topped but I may not be a good enough top to get them to cum. #3. They may have just cum recently. #4. They may need to save it if they are going to see other clients later.

 

Gman

[+ glennnn]

Yes, making him climax= control and real connection = my satisfaction. I don't see why being a bottom or a cock sucker should be seen as being "sub". I feel empowered when he is fucking my ass or I am deep-throating him. I MAKE him cum.

[rvwnsd]

I like seeing them climax before I do. But they seem intent on making me climax first and then say "it's not about me" and then session over. Is it acceptable to say beforehand that I wanna see them cum?

To answer the question posed in the thread title, some escorts will climax and others will not. It is perfectly acceptable for you to ask for what you want, particularly if it is important to you. Then, the escort can decide whether he is willing/able to cum and let you know. One thing to keep in mind is sometimes a guy just can't climax. It happens. A favorite escort who typically has a very intense and explosive orgasm was unable to cum the last time we got together. He did not sleep well the night before and was tired. After he told me this, I was surprised he was able to get and stay hard.

[Mikegaite]

To further undermine the traditional barriers of this forum in which escorts can't post anything opinionated without getting ripped to shreds, I'll answer this question from the escort's perspective. It would be great if every session ended with an orgasm that was the natural product of a buildup of pure pleasure and such climax just naturally occurred around the 57-minute mark. That can happen, but generally things are more scripted. If you ask me, "How do you want to cum?" I won't think "in your mouth or on your chest," I will think "with my next client."

 

I'll cum if you ask, but otherwise will, at least in part, strategically try to hold off cumming. Even when I'm planning to cum, I still have to manipulate it so as not to cum too quickly. And with the most amazing sex in the world where I completely let myself go, I will still feel guilty after orgasming bc it makes the next session that much harder ( softer, actually). My rule is that I cum if the other person expresses interest in my doing so, if the session is longer than two hours, or if the person topping me dislikes cheese or likes to snowmobile (it's an inside joke). Or I'll cum if the orgasm occurs naturally as a result of the other person pushing me over the edge, which may not happen with all ten clients that day, but might very well happen with client number ten since I will have been edging with clients eight and nine. All other things being equal, I'll book the order of clients as glenn calrichmond geminibear rudynate wolfer mike Carey manmed, so that I can alternate between clients who definitely want me to cum with clients who don't care as much about it. And I'll take Gman last bc I know even if I've just seen the seven aforementioned clients, Gman can always fuck me to a wonderful orgasm . Seriously though, I will consider client preference when scheduling so as not to disappoint people. And If my partner gets a turn in the lineup, I definitely won't cum with him bc it's bad for my business.

 

I'm certainly willing to cum and greatly enjoy it, but after I cum, I'm a bit less energized and feel like I'm trying to get the other person to cum rather than engaging in actions based on my genuine arousal. So I would much rather the client cum before I do or ideally at the same time. Usually the bottom is the one who comes first, and that's me about half the time, but in any case I prefer both people coming in the same five-minute time window.

 

I will also admit that for certain clients where there is a stronger physical attraction to a client on my part, or a clients is higher paying, I'm more inclined to try harder to let myself go and fully enjoy the experience to full orgasm. I'll never admit to giving less than 100 percent of myself, but sometimes I will give 120 percent.

 

In short, I'll be strategic but not so much that it ruins the enjoyment of the experience for me. Occasionally I will wear myself out and have inorgasmia, but I know I have a certain number of times i want to cum each day, and an even greater number of times i can cum each day. If a client wants me to save up a big load, I'll steer him to another escort who works fewer hours or who has massive cumshots every time, bc I can't save up big load without focusing too much or trying not to orgasm to the point sex becomes unenjoyable. If I truly feeling like cumming, I don't want to avoid cumming just for the sake of saving it up for someone else.

 

I wouldn't be surprised if the country's very best escorts come amply every time as the result of 100 percent pure passion. But I also know a successful escort who keeps the lights dim, makes the fake orgasm sounds, spits into his hand and pretends his spit is cum, and thus fakes his orgasms so he can save himself for his next client. Most escorts will fall somewhere in between those ends of the spectrum.

 

And that's my honest answer. The sexual experience is partly left-brained and partly right-brained, part theater and part genuine lust. As an escort, I have a love-hate relationship with cumming, and I'm not the only one.

[mike carey]

Great post, Mike.

 

It appears I may have given away a little more about myself than I had thought! OK, so maybe I did give away what I thought!

[Wolfer]

But I also know a successful escort who keeps the lights dim

Ooh, that wouldn't go with me, 'cause I want light and enough of it to clearly see the gorgeous man I'm with. Interesting post, Mike, thanks! I'm keeping an eye on your travel schedule for when you'll be in London or another part of Europe.

[+ SundayZip]

I'd love to see my escort shoot a full quarter cup of creamy white, delicious cum all over the room (or maybe all over my face) and have his head thrown back, yelling my name in uncontrollable ecstasy while he's doing it. But if that doesn't happen, I'm okay with him just being real with me and I know that sex with a real person is unpredictable and can be quirky and variable. Although I like it when we both cum at some point during the date, it doesn't have to be in any order or predefined way. And if we both don't cum, I'm still happy if only one of us cums. I suppose I'm way too easy.

[+ glennnn]

To further undermine the traditional barriers of this forum in which escorts can't post anything opinionated without getting ripped to shreds, I'll answer this question from the escort's perspective. It would be great if every session ended with an orgasm that was the natural product of a buildup of pure pleasure and such climax just naturally occurred around the 57-minute mark. That can happen, but generally things are more scripted. If you ask me, "How do you want to cum?" I won't think "in your mouth or on your chest," I will think "with my next client."

 

I'll cum if you ask, but otherwise will, at least in part, strategically try to hold off cumming. Even when I'm planning to cum, I still have to manipulate it so as not to cum too quickly. And with the most amazing sex in the world where I completely let myself go, I will still feel guilty after orgasming bc it makes the next session that much harder ( softer, actually). My rule is that I cum if the other person expresses interest in my doing so, if the session is longer than two hours, or if the person topping me dislikes cheese or likes to snowmobile (it's an inside joke). Or I'll cum if the orgasm occurs naturally as a result of the other person pushing me over the edge, which may not happen with all ten clients that day, but might very well happen with client number ten since I will have been edging with clients eight and nine. All other things being equal, I'll book the order of clients as glenn calrichmond geminibear rudynate wolfer mike Carey manmed, so that I can alternate between clients who definitely want me to cum with clients who don't care as much about it. And I'll take Gman last bc I know even if I've just seen the seven aforementioned clients, Gman can always fuck me to a wonderful orgasm . Seriously though, I will consider client preference when scheduling so as not to disappoint people. And If my partner gets a turn in the lineup, I definitely won't cum with him bc it's bad for my business.

 

I'm certainly willing to cum and greatly enjoy it, but after I cum, I'm a bit less energized and feel like I'm trying to get the other person to cum rather than engaging in actions based on my genuine arousal. So I would much rather the client cum before I do or ideally at the same time. Usually the bottom is the one who comes first, and that's me about half the time, but in any case I prefer both people coming in the same five-minute time window.

 

I will also admit that for certain clients where there is a stronger physical attraction to a client on my part, or a clients is higher paying, I'm more inclined to try harder to let myself go and fully enjoy the experience to full orgasm. I'll never admit to giving less than 100 percent of myself, but sometimes I will give 120 percent.

 

In short, I'll be strategic but not so much that it ruins the enjoyment of the experience for me. Occasionally I will wear myself out and have inorgasmia, but I know I have a certain number of times i want to cum each day, and an even greater number of times i can cum each day. If a client wants me to save up a big load, I'll steer him to another escort who works fewer hours or who has massive cumshots every time, bc I can't save up big load without focusing too much or trying not to orgasm to the point sex becomes unenjoyable. If I truly feeling like cumming, I don't want to avoid cumming just for the sake of saving it up for someone else.

 

I wouldn't be surprised if the country's very best escorts come amply every time as the result of 100 percent pure passion. But I also know a successful escort who keeps the lights dim, makes the fake orgasm sounds, spits into his hand and pretends his spit is cum, and thus fakes his orgasms so he can save himself for his next client. Most escorts will fall somewhere in between those ends of the spectrum.

 

And that's my honest answer. The sexual experience is partly left-brained and partly right-brained, part theater and part genuine lust. As an escort, I have a love-hate relationship with cumming, and I'm not the only one.

 

Well said and perfectly acceptable. Honestly is appreciated.

[+ Keith30309]

To further undermine the traditional barriers of this forum in which escorts can't post anything opinionated without getting ripped to shreds, I'll answer this question from the escort's perspective.

 

I really appreciate your post for a couple of reasons - first, it's honest and sincere and you can't ask for anything more than that. Second, the thoughts behind the words demonstrate you are keenly interested in the satisfaction of your clients, that you try to know their preferences and learn their behaviors, and that adjust your approach to meet their needs. From a client's perspective I can't ask for much more than that; the rest of the equation is dependent on the chemistry that either exists or doesn't.

 

[All that said, I'd love to play your body like Yo-Yo Ma furiously moving over a cello, making you thrash about, fingers tearing at sheets with body slinging sweat and screams of ecstasy generating calls to 911 from neighbors before spackling the walls with baby batter. ]

[jawjateck]

I rarely care about this issue. Heck, I don't shoot half the time, and some companions have trouble with that. They are accustomed to following a script and feel they have failed. I try to explain, but companions can be just as insecure as clients.

[geminibear]

When it comes down to it, believe it or not, escorts are human beings just like clients and whether they cum or don't cum during a session is just as applicable to them as it is to any other human being.

 

It's nice, it's preferred, it's enjoyable, but is it always going to happen? Probably not.

 

I take away the quality time I spend with a quality guy as a successful session.

 

That's just me.

 

Gem~

[+ Gar1eth]

...AndI'll take Gman last bc I know even if I've just seen the seven aforementioned clients, Gman can always fuck me to a wonderful orgasm .

 

 

Gman

[loverboy95]

This is why you should always communicate those kinds of things to the escort before the session if it is that important.

[+ WhamIAm]

One of the sexiest things in the world for me is to watch my partner climax. Sometimes I have difficulty doing so, so for me my partner's climax is frequently the ultimate payoff. I communicate that to the guys I hire. But, as said above, the guys are human beings, not trained seals. Sometimes it just doesn't happen. That's slightly disappointing, but ok. I've never met anyone who can come on command (am I hanging with the wrong crowd ? ;-))

 

That can come into play when I'm thinking about a rehire, but if the guy seems to give it his best efforts, I'm game to go again. The guys who kill me are the ones who know that it turns me on and gets me off, but once we're together don't really try/make clear through behavior or words that they have no interest in doing so despite our prior communication. My (least) favorite -- the guy who I'd talked abut it with prior, seemed amenable, but abruptly stopped the session 15-20 minutes early and told me I should hit the showers because he wasn't going to come since he had scheduled a headliner dance gig at the Adonis immediately after our 2 hours together. (My other least favorite -- the guy who fakes an orgasm while inside me and immediately hides the condom.) If you're gonna manage your performance to that degree based on your schedule, perhaps you're overscheduling.

[+ Gar1eth]

I'm not into cuming together. If I'm concentrating on me, I can't enjoy seeing the other guy's as much.

 

Gman

[Juan Vancouver]

Is it acceptable to say beforehand that I wanna see them cum?

 

Of course you can say whatever you want to say. Don't hold back. Especially be clear if him having an orgasm will make you believe the session was successful.

 

Legalities aside, (in most parts of the world buying a sex act or a bodily fluid is illegal) I personally do not promise or negotiate any physical outcome. Especially an orgasm. I love having fun and enjoying a pleasurable time together, and if this leads to one or more orgasms, then that's great. For me, however, pleasure happens all throughout the process. Ejaculate is a very poor gauge of whether or not I had fun.

 

If you MUST see someone cum or you won't be able to tick the box, then be very clear in the booking process. If you told me "you have to cum or else" I would politely decline the session because I take a lot of pride in offering an organic, human, genuine, fully present experience, not a mechanical, automated, pre-planned one. I will not force myself to do anything to please someone. That is not my job.

 

Some people crave the service I provide, some others need to tick the boxes in the sexual shopping list. There is no right or wrong, but you must make sure that you meet with escorts who understand what you expect and agree with it, otherwise you will always feel shortchanged and unfairly will think they underperformed.

 

This is not to say I don't cum. I love cumming and I do it as often as I can, but I don't cum on command and don't come all the time.

 

A lot of clients say that the most important thing for them is to give their escort pleasure, and for that reason they must come to prove they were successful at that. I find this logic sadly self-defeating. Pleasure is given all throughout the session and there's thousand opportunities to do this. The problem with this logic is that if you need a quart of cum to prove he had a good time it is necessarily because you were not paying attention to your partner's cues. Had you paid attention, you would know you have been giving him pleasure. Furthermore, if in order to prove you are giving him pleasure you are cornering him to prove this to you by cumming, then I assure you there is absolutely nothing sexy, fun or pleasurable about it.

 

Try to remember how many otherwise amazing sessions of yours ended with twenty really uncomfortable minutes of a desperate escort furiously jerking off trying to make himself orgasm. The interaction is lost, the connection is gone, mutual pleasure doesn't matter. He is gone to a secret place where only he and his fantasies live to try to get himself to that place.

 

When after twenty minutes of furious jerking he actually came... was it enjoyable for you? Did it look as if you gave him this orgasm? Do you think that was a pleasurable experience for him?

 

Demanding your partner to cum is akin to forcing him to bottom. Sure, an experienced man might be able to do it to fulfill you, but I assure you that if it didn't happen organically, it didn't feel good.

 

Pay attention to your partner. Listen to his sounds and his body. You might be shocked by how much pleasure you are giving him without knowing. I assure you that if you pay attention to that, his orgasm will not be a must have or else... and if there is no pressure, there is pleasure,. which means sometimes you might actually reach that point organically.

 

Sex and intimacy is about being present, being real, being organic, together.

[Rudynate]

For me, however, pleasure happens all throughout the process.

 

Amen.