Do you give a shit if the person you're hiring is a drug user?

[marylander1940]

yes, I do because my phone will help his "undoing" and failure as a person, possibly causing his death...

[rvwnsd]

It's the sort of thing that people with time on their hands worry about.

Just like those who get all riled up about the v-word.

[tanman4u]

I'm glad Mocha exempted weed, dick pills, and alcohol as I'm into them all (hell just look at my Avatar), and I'll add poppers too but that's it for me. I wish A4A would let someone say Yes to weed rather than just lumping it into the "drugs" category. My profile says "Often" to the question but in the text I mention 420 but I probably miss out on some potential hookups because of it. I try not to smoke as much anymore due to the smell and the risk of a hotel hitting me with a $250 smoking cleanup fee, but I love my edibles.

 

When I'm hiring I, of course, would prefer that the guy I'm paying not be cracked out beyond being able to perform but I would certainly have no problem blazing one or several with him. As a client since I'm not cracked out I don't think my being buzzed should matter at all to the guy I'm hiring.

 

Now all that said, I actually hired Mocha for a few hours a few years ago and I never reviewed him. We ended up, through some miscommunication meeting up several hours later that I had intended and I had consumed several more glasses of wine and smoked quite a bit so to be honest I don't really remember much of it. Certainly not his fault at all. At some point if our paths ever cross in the same city again I definitely plan on giving him a go again, and this time I'll probably cut down on the wine.....certainly not the weed.

[Despardo]

I'm glad Mocha exempted weed, dick pills, and alcohol as I'm into them all (hell just look at my Avatar), and I'll add poppers too but that's it for me. I wish A4A would let someone say Yes to weed rather than just lumping it into the "drugs" category. My profile says "Often" to the question but in the text I mention 420 but I probably miss out on some potential hookups because of it. I try not to smoke as much anymore due to the smell and the risk of a hotel hitting me with a $250 smoking cleanup fee, but I love my edibles.

 

When I'm hiring I, of course, would prefer that the guy I'm paying not be cracked out beyond being able to perform but I would certainly have no problem blazing one or several with him. As a client since I'm not cracked out I don't think my being buzzed should matter at all to the guy I'm hiring.

 

Now all that said, I actually hired Mocha for a few hours a few years ago and I never reviewed him. We ended up, through some miscommunication meeting up several hours later that I had intended and I had consumed several more glasses of wine and smoked quite a bit so to be honest I don't really remember much of it. Certainly not his fault at all. At some point if our paths ever cross in the same city again I definitely plan on giving him a go again, and this time I'll probably cut down on the wine.....certainly not the weed.

Edibles are so convenient! I live in Washington, so there is a huge selection of clever and highly portable products available over the counter. Also, vaporizers eliminate the smoke problem in hotels.

[+ Keith30309]

I think that when a guy shows up to work he should be ready to do his job. If, every Saturday night, I drink until I pass out but on Monday morning I'm at 100% then it's none of the business of the guy who pays me.

 

I know a guy who is far more mellow and likely a better lover after smoking a joint. I've also chased a meth-smoking twink around an apartment for 3 1/2 hours. {Not in the good way.}

All that said, I do become very uneasy on incalls with someone I don't know who hints at 'partying'... I'm likely to pass on him for purely safety reasons.

[Rudynate]

I think that when a guy shows up to work he should be ready to do his job. If, every Saturday night, I drink until I pass out but on Monday morning I'm at 100% then it's none of the business of the guy who pays me.

 

I know a guy who is far more mellow and likely a better lover after smoking a joint. I've also chased a meth-smoking twink around an apartment for 3 1/2 hours.

All that said, I do become very uneasy on incalls with someone I don't know who hints at 'partying'... I'm likely to pass on him for purely safety reasons.

 

In the hiring/hookup scene, "partying" is code for hard drugs . . . meth, cocaine, MDMA, etc.. If you read "partying" in a guy's profile and you don't want anything to do with hard drugs, pass him by.

[AdamSmith]

The messy reality of life, though.

 

An escort I wanted to like a lot proved to be too addicted to blow & booze.

 

OTOH a few who were clearly (and openly, honestly) addicted to heroin or other opioid were some of the best (& best performing -- go figure) escorts I have ever hired.

 

It depends on the people involved: him, and you.

 

Choose accordingly.

[Rudynate]

The messy reality of life, though.

 

An escort I wanted to like a lot proved to be too addicted to blow & booze.

 

OTOH a few who were clearly (and openly, honestly) addicted to heroin or other opioid were some of the best (& best performing -- go figure) escorts I have ever hired.

 

It depends on the people involved: him, and you.

 

Choose accordingly.

 

Right. Someone who mentioned PnP in his profile wouldn't be an automatic "no" for me.

[+ harey]

I know this is ask an escort....but I figure it would be what makes a good encounter with one. It's kinda late and maybe I need to go to Bed, but for the past few weeks I just can't get my mind off of something. One person mentioned this in another thread:

 

I'm kind of at a point where I'm so fed up with drug use in the gay community as it is. It's become so common that whenever a group of gays get together, there's some hardcore drug use going on. And for someone who has witnessed lives lost, I can't stand it around me. It just makes me not want to be a part of an entire subculture.

 

@Mocha Good for you, getting out of a bad situation.

 

Do I give a shit if the person I'm hiring is a drug user? My short answer would be "no", because an escort's personal choices are none of my business. If he acts sane during a meeting, then it might not be an issue - or I might not even know. However, if an escort is creating problems for any reason then I wouldn't call again. Erratic or untrustworthy behavior isn't usually a one-time occurrence, whether it's caused by drugs, a hard life, or general craziness.

 

I've had acquaintances in the past who used meth while appearing to maintain a fairly normal live, but they were never close friends. Whatever kept them on drugs also kept me from getting close. The same would be true for the one or two paid companions that I consider (or eventually may consider) to be friends. I might still hire them occasionally if they used hard drugs on their own time, but there wouldn't be a very strong connection. My guard would always be up, even more so than usual, and any kind of emotional closeness would be impossible.

 

I seldom see an escort more than once or twice. When I decide to invest more time, it's always for reasons beyond the physical.

[+ Keith30309]

@Mocha Good for you, getting out of a bad situation.

 

Do I give a shit if the person I'm hiring is a drug user? My short answer would be "no", because an escort's personal choices are none of my business. If he acts sane during a meeting, then it might not be an issue - or I might not even know. However, if an escort is creating problems for any reason then I wouldn't call again. Erratic or untrustworthy behavior isn't usually a one-time occurrence, whether it's caused by drugs, a hard life, or general craziness.

 

I've had acquaintances in the past who used meth while appearing to maintain a fairly normal live, but they were never close friends. Whatever kept them on drugs also kept me from getting close. The same would be true for the one or two paid companions that I consider (or eventually may consider) to be friends. I might still hire them occasionally if they used hard drugs on their own time, but there wouldn't be a very strong connection. My guard would always be up, even more so than usual, and any kind of emotional closeness would be impossible.

 

I seldom see an escort more than once or twice. When I decide to invest more time, it's always for reasons beyond the physical.

 

+1

I'm not sure if I've been lucky, but I've met about 50 different guys and only met 3 who were noticeably high on meth or something similar to the point that it ruined the encounter. I hired them because there was something beyond the physical that attracted me and the drug completely negated it. Had they not partaken before our session things may have gone dramatically better. I wish I knew how to predict this... one of the 3 overtly stated in his profile that he rigorously avoided any contact with PnP. That said, if they are of a sound mind when I meet them then it's none of my business what they did the preceding day. Unfortunately addiction doesn't work this way.

[Juan Vancouver]

• Even habitual steroid or marijuana users develop a persistent "charm" I associate with addictive behavior; they develop a skill for attaching themselves to friends and associates who can provide them with money to support their habits.
  

That is interesting, I have never heard that, and I live in Vancouver, where a huge percentage of the population smoke pot on a regular basis.

 

But maybe that is why Vancouverites at large are so charming. I never thought it was because they were looking for my money, though.

[+ Eric Hassan]

This is an interesting history lesson.

 

http://www.drugpolicy.org/blog/how-did-marijuana-become-illegal-first-place

[Becket]

Drug use affects a large part of this community. I've met escorts who were too stoned to take care of business. I myself have gone to encounters loaded once or twice. Dangerous as hell, I know. Fortunately I was with someone who was more interested in my well being than anything else. But I ought to know better. I'll not be commenting much more on the drug use of others. I need to get my own house in order.

[MasterMaxRR]

Hi Mocha!

 

I've responded to another of your posts, but without having the time to wait for a response on that to gauge your acceptance of my advice, I feel the need to express my opinion on drug use as it pertains to escorting regardless of the fact that we may not see eye to eye on other subjects. It is absolutely a valid and vital question, and every escort and client needs to find where they stand on this issue so they can communicate their positions clearly and avoid a lot of the drama that goes with this prevalent use of drugs in the gay community.

 

Personally, if a client wants to smoke a doobie, have a few drinks or even a couple hits of whatever so they can get into the session, then I'm all for that. In moderation, drugs and alcohol can be a great way for clients to get past some of the inhibitions that come with this line of work. Having said that, if anyone is off their face or clearly showing addled judgement, reasoning ability, or lack of emotional stability, then it's a deal breaker for me. It can be hard to tell which is which, but if you're not sure how to tell or don't have a lot of experience with hanging around recreational drug users, then it would be my recommendation to have a strict policy of NO drugs. I've had my own addictions with drugs and alcohol many, many years ago, so I have the experience to deal with these types of situations so it allows me to be a little lenient on this matter. If you can't spot a tweaking meth-head a mile away, don't allow meth in your sessions. If you're a pothead then it will be easier to relate to a client that needs a couple puffs of dank to get over their own insecurities or just find their groove so they can enjoy what you as an escort has to offer.

 

I suppose if a client NEEDS the drug to perform or be comfortable with what they're doing, then it's probably wise to pass on those clients unless you feel adequate to the task of pointing that out to them. On the other hand if they just want to do a little something, but are perfectly willing to set it aside to respect your boundaries in this issue, then they're probably not the ones you need to be worried about.

 

My best advice to anyone asking the same question as you did, is if you don't know how to respond to a P4P request, then chances are you need to respond in a way that gets you out of the situation altogether.

 

Love and Light,

Master Max

[MasterMaxRR]

Sorry, I forgot to add that while I have a relaxed policy on CLIENTS that use drugs recreationally, I take a dim view of escorts who do drugs just so they can do their job. I feel that to show up as an escort myself, stoned or tweaked out when it affects my ability to be the best I can be to someone who is paying me to present myself professionally and clear-headed, it's just a line that I will never cross. It's one of the few things that I simply cannot excuse in other escorts, but I'll allow that this might be a hypocritical or biased viewpoint for me to have. Hate me or love me, it's just the way I feel, and I'm very certain I'm not the only one who feels this way. 'Nuff said.

 

Love and Light,

Master Max