Am I too timid -or- should I learn to stop worrying and love the blue balls

[Guest Starbuck]

To the OP, I think that WmClarke and Chris Eisenhower, the first men to respond on this thread, gave you a clear assessment of your experience and the right idea on how to move forward. Choose carefully. Communicate clearly. Show respect and expect it in return.

[Rudynate]

Again (and again and again) we are reminded of what it sounded like when Bill Clinton told us, "It depends what the definition of 'is' is."

 

Amen.

[Juan Vancouver]

Thank-you Juan; You have jut proudly proclaimed the essence of the website.

 

Thank you for chiming in, Daddy. It really means a lot.

 

I know there are many clients who embrace this way of looking at escorting and are excited to have a personal human connection with a complete human being. As with everything else, it is a small faction that is the loudest and makes it look as if their opinion is the only one, the right one, the only one that can ever be correct for all.

 

For some, what I write is bullshit, lies in advertising, hypocritical loopholes, shame-ridden euphemisms, you name it. For some others, however, this makes sense, feels good and makes them want to meet with escorts who feel this way. I come here in the hope I will be able to connect with the latter.

 

Big hugs to everyone! Whatever your view on the subject may be, I wish you you will find your perfect match.

[MiamiLooker]

Escorting, however you see it is illegal in most states.

 

Good to know…I’m pretty sure most forum readers aren’t aware of this.

[Guy Fawkes]

Sorry Juan, I'm going to disagree with you; Escorting is legal in most jurisdictions. There are other offenses that are often incorrectly associated with escorting that are illegal. I don't recommend that anybody break the law.

 

Escorting, however you see it is illegal in most states.

Good to know…I’m pretty sure most forum readers aren’t aware of this.

[adriano46]

Back to the original OP, when meeting someone who is a stunner (as most hires are vis a vis the client) it happens that one gets shy and reserved. When the escort is also a well-known porn star (and stardom is often relative), it can also be a bit nerve-wracking. Some porn actors have turned out to be absolute gems in the sack (Michael Vincenzo, Antton Harri, Valentin Petrov, and many -- too many -- Hungarians of a past time). But I learned that I should be the one to initiate, especially if the conversation seems to be getting the upper hand. Often I over-compensate offering refreshments before we begin; learned to save those for the after-glow, just having water readily available. I learned too, while helping a guy off with the coat, to gently touch (he is not a piece of meat) his shoulder or arm, and not be shy about gently touching him while chatting.

 

I hopefully have never treated an escort/hire as some sort of product. I enjoy the friendly interaction, which is one reason I usually hire for 2 hours, to avoid a sort of commercial feel to it all. I also study assiduously the reviews here to avoid situations of hiring a guy who is less than up to performing fully to my expectations.

[gregkidman]

I am late to this thread but I agree with adriano46. Just a little friendly interaction in the beginning, and the rest should fall into place. One move that I have is when we start chatting at the start, I start removing my shirt. If he removes his shirt, then keep removing your bits of clothing and he will do the same! Pretty soon, Bob's your uncle and you two are having fun!

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

I am late to this thread but I agree with adriano46. Just a little friendly interaction in the beginning, and the rest should fall into place. One move that I have is when we start chatting at the start, I start removing my shirt. If he removes his shirt, then keep removing your bits of clothing and he will do the same! Pretty soon, Bob's your uncle and you two are having fun!

 

Even better—work on taking his shirt off instead of your own.

[mike carey]

Even better—work on taking his shirt off instead of your own.

 

Well said, Chris! Focussing on your partner rather than yourself is always the way to go.

[+ Chris Eisenhower]

Well... it's great that either approach gets the ball rolling, so to speak. But there's clinical and there's sexy.

 

Go for sexy.

[ZhenXBear]

As a new member, I'm reading the various threads and just absorbing everything. While I am very very new to this arena, I must say that whether I am with an hired companion or dearest lover, both will always receive the utmost respect, kindness, openness and decency I can give.

 

I could never rationalize stripping away another person's humanity and basic human dignity, simply because there's been an exchange of currency. While I might have specific desires I want fulfilled, I do not feel entitled to them, especially at the expense of another person's emotional well being.

 

To me, male companions who provide this type of service, and do it exceptionally well, are nothing short of a gift. For a brief period of time, I am given the opportunity to share someone's life and hopefully impart some of mine, leaving with a lasting memory and a positive exchange of energy, that can be approximated with someone else, yet never replicated, since every one of us is unique.

 

Reducing the event to body mechanics and cash, seems bleak to me; even the proponents of such objectified, sterile interactions will not entirely be able to refute that they desire true human contact beyond the interactions they could receive from a warm cadaver.

[marylander1940]

Be more direct. Eventually move in for a kiss. Or take their hand and lead him to the bedroom. Or both.

 

Four hours and no sex? Please post a review of each. You got ripped off.

 

Exactly.... here's the other alternative!

 

you ain't 14, man up and fuck/get fucked.

 

http://www.hookingupandstayinghooked.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/blue-balls.jpg

 

http://www.92citifm.ca/files/blue-balls-637x476.png

[Amoco]

Keith..Did I miss something? After you saw each of the two escorts who you wanted to have sex with but didn't, what did you say to them when you rehired them for a second romp? Was there any discussion of your desires? I have no idea what was going on the first time that you saw them, but if I was an escort rehired after a session in which I was just hanging out with a client without having sex, I would probably assume that that's what he wanted.

[sincitymix]

As a new member, I'm reading the various threads and just absorbing everything. While I am very very new to this arena, I must say that whether I am with an hired companion or dearest lover, both will always receive the utmost respect, kindness, openness and decency I can give.

 

I could never rationalize stripping away another person's humanity and basic human dignity, simply because there's been an exchange of currency. While I might have specific desires I want fulfilled, I do not feel entitled to them, especially at the expense of another person's emotional well being.

 

To me, male companions who provide this type of service, and do it exceptionally well, are nothing short of a gift. For a brief period of time, I am given the opportunity to share someone's life and hopefully impart some of mine, leaving with a lasting memory and a positive exchange of energy, that can be approximated with someone else, yet never replicated, since every one of us is unique.

 

Reducing the event to body mechanics and cash, seems bleak to me; even the proponents of such objectified, sterile interactions will not entirely be able to refute that they desire true human contact beyond the interactions they could receive from a warm cadaver.

 

But.. but.. what if I want the escort to treat ME like a piece of meat?

[+ Keith30309]

The first escort was my first real hiring experience - I chose him, in part, because he was mid-30's, heavily reviewed and I had no idea what to expect but assumed he was a pro. With the first visit with him the conversation was nonstop jumping from topic to topic - pleasant, intelligent and engaging, albiet from across the room. After 2 hours he was sort of like "Well, I need to run an errand" and walked me to the door. I know it sounds foolish but I honestly didn't realize it wasn't the norm. I assumed a second 2 hour visit would be more interesting but it was the same except cut short about 20 minutes because he was delayed buzzing me in to the front gate and he had to leave for another obligation. I will say that after that I was pretty sure I couldn't handle a third $450 chat . To your question of what I said - nothing about my expectations, likes, dislikes, etc - simply that I was new and curious. I realize now that I should have done this, especially when I scheduled our second visit, and not been so timid.

 

The second escort was young and new and I'm not sure either he or I quite knew what to expect. RB shows his account as deleted - I assume he is exploring other opportunities.

 

I don't harbor any ill-will and consider these to be learning experiences, albiet expensive ones. Since then I've had several positive, intimate, mutually-enjoyable encounters in Atlanta and traveling and have become more comfortable in having that initial expectations discussion.

Thanks to everyone in offering your thoughts and suggestions - I greatly appreciate them.

[+ purplekow]

 

I don't harbor any ill-will and consider these to be learning experiences, albiet expensive ones. Since then I've had several positive, intimate, mutually-enjoyable encounters in Atlanta and traveling and have become more comfortable in having that initial expectations discussion.

Thanks to everyone in offering your thoughts and suggestions - I greatly appreciate them.

Keith, glad you finally figured out how to get the key in the ignition and the transmission out of park. Hope you are cruising the highways and biways,