I don't care if he's gay or straight

[+ SundayZip]

I've read a lot of posts here where people say things like, "I'd prefer to hire gay escorts so that they'll enjoy sex with me" or "Why would you ever hire a straight escort?! The sex will be no good" or "I don't like straight guys in gay porn because they're just acting".

 

Just because an escort self identifies as gay, doesn't mean he'll be sexually attracted to you and therefore all fired up about having sex with you in the way that you hope. I consider myself 100% gay and have absolutely no interest in having sex with Donald Trump. He's a man and I'm gay, so does that mean I'm into him sexually? Heck no! If forced, I'd have sex with Elizabeth Warren before having sex with Donald Trump and yet I still consider myself gay.

 

Some of my best experiences have been with a rentboy who identifies as straight - and I believe that he is 99.8% straight (whatever that means). But he was willing to stretch his boundaries for me and he didn't do it because he thought I was sexy. He did it because I was courteous, clean and respectful. I've also had poor experiences with escorts who identify as gay; the "gay" escort was impatient, incompetent or just dishonest. Certainly I've had awesome experiences with escorts who identify as gay, but the fact that they were "gay" seemed incidental to me. It was more their personality, outlook and a few physical characteristics that made it good for me.

 

My theory is that a man who is highly sexual (gay or straight) and is open, adventurous and willing, can provide a great experience for another man. There are plenty of "straight" men out there that are better qualified than a lot of "gay" men.

 

Do any others think this way, or is it oddball thinking here?

[bigvalboy]

I've read a lot of posts here where people say things like, "I'd prefer to hire gay escorts so that they'll enjoy sex with me" or "Why would you ever hire a straight escort?! The sex will be no good" or "I don't like straight guys in gay porn because they're just acting".

 

Just because an escort self identifies as gay, doesn't mean he'll be sexually attracted to you and therefore all fired up about having sex with you in the way that you hope. I consider myself 100% gay and have absolutely no interest in having sex with Donald Trump. He's a man and I'm gay, so does that mean I'm into him sexually? Heck no! If forced, I'd have sex with Elizabeth Warren before having sex with Donald Trump and yet I still consider myself gay.

 

Some of my best experiences have been with a rentboy who identifies as straight - and I believe that he is 99.8% straight (whatever that means). But he was willing to stretch his boundaries for me and he didn't do it because he thought I was sexy. He did it because I was courteous, clean and respectful. I've also had poor experiences with escorts who identify as gay; the "gay" escort was impatient, incompetent or just dishonest. Certainly I've had awesome experiences with escorts who identify as gay, but the fact that they were "gay" seemed incidental to me. It was more their personality, outlook and a few physical characteristics that made it good for me.

 

My theory is that a man who is highly sexual (gay or straight) and is open, adventurous and willing, can provide a great experience for another man. There are plenty of "straight" men out there that are better qualified than a lot of "gay" men.

 

Do any others think this way, or is it oddball thinking here?

 

Bingo....I believe that we are all just sexual beings, and the degree to which we are, or identify as, gay or straight, just depends how far on the pendulum we swing. Whether or not an encounter is successful, or not, depends on many factors, with someones sexual identity as being only part of that equation. lol...IMHO of course.

[+ azdr0710]

thanks for the practical and to-the-point post, Sunday.....like BVB, I also certainly agree with you.....it took me a long time to realize there is a wide spectrum of tolerance and orientation (used to think one was only very obviously gay or very obviously straight!!).....

 

certainly not oddball thinking at all....on the contrary, it's probably very much the correct way to look at this

[instudiocity]

My problem is if I hire a guy who advertises as 'straight' and 'versatile' will he really bottom for me?

 

I don't remember seeing very many 'straight' guys advertising as 'Bottoms'?

[Tonyko]

I have a bud BTW who I laugh at because he prefers hiring str8 men (meaning they not only have sex with women they're married or have GF's or LIVE w women and LIVE a str8 lifestyle, like most of the guys who come in from Jersey to dance at Adonis :-) And I laugh because he constantly frets over his looks before every appointment, he'll darken his eyebrows and cover his crowsfeet and try to dress sexy etc and I say IT DOESN'T MAAAAAAATER LOL. He's NOT ATTRACTED TO YOUUUUUU. He may be very sexual, and responsive to the touch, and giving and great at what he does, but just like YOU don't want to have sex with a Playboy Centerfold any more than you want to with Betty White because you're NOT attracted to women, it's the SAME with him. In reverse lol. A Str8 escort is not going to walk in and think wow hot guy. So just be clean and smell nice and have good breath and THAT he will appreciate. That's all you need:-)

[marylander1940]

I have a bud BTW who I laugh at because he prefers hiring str8 men (meaning they not only have sex with women they're married or have GF's or LIVE w women and LIVE a str8 lifestyle, like most of the guys who come in from Jersey to dance at Adonis :-) And I laugh because he constantly frets over his looks before every appointment, he'll darken his eyebrows and cover his crowsfeet and try to dress sexy etc and I say IT DOESN'T MAAAAAAATER LOL. He's NOT ATTRACTED TO YOUUUUUU. He may be very sexual, and responsive to the touch, and giving and great at what he does, but just like YOU don't want to have sex with a Playboy Centerfold any more than you want to with Betty White because you're NOT attracted to women, it's the SAME with him. In reverse lol. A Str8 escort is not going to walk in and think wow hot guy. So just be clean and smell nice and have good breath and THAT he will appreciate. That's all you need:-)

 

The escort appreciates very much your friends b/j skills but he wants

 

$

[+ Gar1eth]

I realize a gay escort will not be into me- but in my case the pendulum has swung. The idea of any sex scared me when I was younger but at least I knew I was into males because males aroused me. The only time I remember being even partially aroused at the thought of a female was when I woke up from a dream once when I was about 17. I was hoping that meant I was developing an attraction to the fairer sex but no such luck. So the reason I, in general , never wanted to hire a straight escort was because I attribute to them the same feelings I would have about being with a woman. And very occasionally, maybe even a gay escort might enjoy being with me.

 

Gman

[Bryanforservice]

Labels like gay, straight, and bi, while convenient, rarely give enough nuance about something as complex as sexuality much less sexual attraction. I agree they do make things easier when it comes to understanding a persons (client or escorts) interests. However, the question in the context of a client/escort relationship is will both parties *enjoy* the experience. I would hope that the escorts who doing this are doing it because they enjoy it on some level - certainly it seems the most successful among us are in this camp. What exactly they enjoy may vary among escorts and among each client engagement: the exchange of money, the sex itself, the power, the release, the affection for the client, the admiration/affection from the client, or in many cases the actual attraction to the client. That, is what I would suggest is most important - that both parties enjoy the experience regardless of labels.

 

That being said, I think it can be a consideration for many that hire to "support" our community and for those that choose to hire escorts who identify as gay to keep it in the "family" I respect and appreciate your commitment to do so!

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

I agree with SundayZip's perspective. Although I've never hired a straight escort, I would not be opposed to doing so. (I have hired escorts that are bi.) I suspect that the reason I've not hired straight escorts are twofold - - limited escort options where I am and I check the reviews before hiring someone new. (I do not recall reading any good reviews where the escort was identified as straight.)

[+ deej]

I don't remember seeing very many 'straight' guys advertising as 'Bottoms'?

 

One of the best bottoms I've ever had claimed to be straight. Had a girlfriend he lived with. He just happened to love having a big dick shoved up his ass from time to time. Apparently the GF had a collection of strap-ons and liked to use them, but sometimes he wanted the real thing.

 

He was the only guy I knew who claimed straight but had memberships to all the local bathhouses so he could sometimes get that itch scratched. (And I was always happy to help scratch that itch.)

 

There is no generality (including this one) that explains all of human sexuality. The smart ones (and the rare ones) are the ones that admit it to themselves and remain open on all hailing frequencies.

[+ Gar1eth]

There is no generality (including this one) that explains all of human sexuality. The smart ones (and the rare ones) are the ones that admit it to themselves and remain open on all hailing frequencies.

 

Deej-you let yourself off a big ledge with the parenthetical 'including this one'. I mean without it- you make it sound like it might be my close-mindedness that keeps me from responding to women. And if I were more 'open' I'd have no trouble being attracted to them. And I assure you that's not the case. Or that I'm pretty much 90% or more a top and for medical reasons don't bottom- but according to your generality-maybe if I were more open to possibilities (aside from the medical reasons) should want to bottom.

 

I'm not saying that some people aren't more flexible than others. I just wonder if that's more the exception than the rule.

 

Gman

[+ SundayZip]

okay, now that I've had chance rail against posters who categorically dismiss rentboys who self-identify as straight, it's time for me to come clean... full disclosure.

 

When selecting an escort from on-line ads, I'll probably hire the guy who identifies as gay before I hire the guy who says he's straight. There's a higher probability that the "gay" escort will give me a full service experience -- when that's what I'm looking for. But I also hire guys from other venues; Montreal strip clubs, Rio rentboy saunas, other places. It is in those venues where I might feel chemistry with a "straight" guy and then hire him for offsite visits. I hired a straight dancer from a Montreal strip club multiple times over a period of 11 months and he turned out to be a really nice BF experience (although he was probably not 100% straight). I had a similar experience in Barcelona. I hired a “straight” guy from a rentboy sauna for a couple off-site visits and he definitely turned out to be full service. Damn! He was good.

 

I very much welcome “straight” guys into the community of men who hire men and I whole heartily support men who hire them (me included) and do not automatically assume that straight guys will provide a second class experience.

 

<step down from soapbox here>

[wklucas]

kinda cute...but kinda strange....." Im not homophobic" -

 

 

http://rentmen.com/BodybuilderFOYOU

[Rudynate]

If the straight guy found it that repellant, he wouldn't be doing it. I'm the first to admit that I don't understand it, but there are escorts, who identify as straight, who will do anything - top, bottom, deep kissing, oral, etc. I even encountered, on a message board once, a straight guy who liked to be fisted by men. He said it feels a lot better to be fisted by a man than to be fisted by a woman - go figure.

 

 

If they say they're straight, I believe they're straight. I don't know how a straight man can bring himself to get so deeply involved in sex with another man, but I'm sure glad they can.

 

There are straight men who enjoy gay men. For some reason, straight guys tend to enjoy being around me. I'm a magnet for a certain sort of straight guy. The relationships turn out to be sort of bromances - no sex, but the friendship has a kind of romantic edge to it. I really enjoy these slightly ambiguous relationships that I develop with straight guys.

[marylander1940]

kinda cute...but kinda strange....." Im not homophobic" -

 

 

http://rentmen.com/BodybuilderFOYOU

 

That deserves a thread!

[Guest]

I've had bad experiences with escorts who identify as straight, so I avoid hiring them. They're usually lousy kissers, and kissing is very important for me. I may not be God's gift to gay mankind, but I don't want to hire an escort who's thinking "Ew, yuck!" as we're having sex. I'm a pretty horny guy, but I'd be thinking "Ew, yuck!" if I were to have sex with a woman, even a pretty one.

[+ Gar1eth]

I do realize at least intellectually if not emotionally/or in my gut that lots of men and women must be more flexible than I am. I mean as I said in my last post I have never really been aroused by a woman--not even in my teenage years when my hormones were surging (although I do have to wonder how much my fear of sex might have contributed to that). But if others weren't more flexible than I am, then all of y'all who have been married probably would never have become fathers (or mothers if there are any lesbian members of the Forum).

 

But the discussion on how flexible we are in our sexual attractions always reminds me of this scene from the Brit-Com Coupling. I loved that show. I wanted to post this scene in my original post above, but I didn't have a program that would let me screen capture. Then lo and behold I received an email yesterday out of the blue for a screen capture software. This was my 1st attempt at a screen capture, so it may not be the best. But here it is.

 

To set the scene. This is from Season 1 Episode 2 "Size Matters". Jane, a main character is on what she thinks is a date with one time character Howard. But Howard is trying to get Jane to realize why they aren't on a date. I think as in the Roberta Flack song "Killing Me Softly With His Song," Howard is "telling my whole life with his words."

 

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/idu1wu6417i2riu/Coupling Season 1 Episode 2 - Size Matters - YouTube.wmv?dl=0

 

Gman

[big-n-tall]

I don't care what the escort or whom ever I encounter identifies as. If I'm attracted to the person... I'm attracted. If I'm having fun with that person and that person seems to be having fun in return, that's fine with me. Honestly, my best experience (escort-wise) has been with a bi guy. On the flip side, my worse experience has been with a bi guy.

 

I don't think there is really any quantifying element, in terms of the sex, about someone's sexual identity (when it comes to man on man intercourse). I think it's more an issue of chemistry between the two. But what do I know. :-) I can only speak on my experiences. Everyone is different and approaches things, at least somewhat differently.

[Nvr2Thick]

As much as I enjoy an affectionate gay topman, I've found that I truly love being with an oversexed, overly proud sexual alpha straight man. Every now and then I find a guy who gets off on his own attributes; he's honestly attractive, gifted and skilled, and he gets off on the attraction. He may not be attracted to me, but neither are some of the a-list gay tops I hire. In this case the man is so proud of his attributes that having a gay guy hung up on his big dick and virility gets him excited. We both have a common interest, his big fat dick and what it can do -- and that makes for a hot, hot scene.

[Guest countryboywny]

He just happened to love having a big dick shoved up his ass from time to time.

 

Bragging or fact, Deej? LOL

[Rudynate]

I don't care what the escort or whom ever I encounter identifies as. If I'm attracted to the person... I'm attracted. If I'm having fun with that person and that person seems to be having fun in return, that's fine with me. Honestly, my best experience (escort-wise) has been with a bi guy. On the flip side, my worse experience has been with a bi guy.

 

I don't think there is really any quantifying element, in terms of the sex, about someone's sexual identity (when it comes to man on man intercourse). I think it's more an issue of chemistry between the two. But what do I know. :-) I can only speak on my experiences. Everyone is different and approaches things, at least somewhat differently.

 

I've done some reading recently on straight men who have sex with other men. I read in a couple of different articles that said that the primary difference between a gay man and a straight man who has sex with other men is that the straight guy is into the act, while the gay guy is into the other guy. If that's true, it would mean that the straight guy can have some incredibly erotic experiences with other men, but he would be less likely to experience the connection and the intimacy and that whole wonderful panoply of emotion that gay men can experience with each other, even when they were complete strangers up until the time that they had sex.

[+ Keith30309]

Perhaps resurrecting a horse that was long ago beaten to death, but it's a topic that I've wrestled with a couple of times. I have to agree with TGuy - for me there is a big emotional component to what I look for in an experience insofar as I really enjoy the elements of intimacy I find with some. I find it really hard to envision being with a straight guy who would enjoy the same intimacy with me... perhaps the sex would be awesome, but that's not all I'm looking for.

 

BTW - this is what made me search for threads on this topic:

http://www.rentboy.com/Listing.aspx?lid=950023&scid=158215134&sp=1&pos=1&locid=1442&iid=511909&type=escort

If he were gay he'd be my first stop in Miami.

[+ Gar1eth]

Perhaps resurrecting a horse that was long ago beaten to death, but it's a topic that I've wrestled with a couple of times. I have to agree with TGuy - for me there is a big emotional component to what I look for in an experience insofar as I really enjoy the elements of intimacy I find with some. I find it really hard to envision being with a straight guy who would enjoy the same intimacy with me... perhaps the sex would be awesome, but that's not all I'm looking for.

 

BTW - this is what made me search for threads on this topic:

http://www.rentboy.com/Listing.aspx?lid=950023&scid=158215134&sp=1&pos=1&locid=1442&iid=511909&type=escort

If he were gay he'd be my first stop in Miami.

 

It's a good thing his 'straightness' is keeping you from meeting. Because from what I can tell by googling his pictures if you were to go to Miami, the person answering the ad would probably not be the guy in the pictures. This guy is a French model. And I really doubt he is escorting. But maybe you would have been lucky, and it would have been him.

 

Gman

[+ Keith30309]

<facepalms>

 

I just finished reading all the reviews for Miami guys and it seems like there's allot of mediocre/bad reports and overt rip-off's there. Is there something about Miami that's problematic?

[MiamiLooker]

BTW - this is what made me search for threads on this topic:

http://www.rentboy.com/Listing.aspx?lid=950023&scid=158215134&sp=1&pos=1&locid=1442&iid=511909&type=escort

If he were gay he'd be my first stop in Miami.

 

"If he were gay..."

What about rephrasing it to "if he were real"? The guy that shows up won't be the guy in the ad...