Anyone NYers want a Fag Hag? Photo of hag available

[+ FreshFluff]

I knew that would get your attention. No, you're not a "fag," and I'm not a hag. (Below is a photo showing my body and the bottom of my face in case you wanted to check. It's about about a year old, and I'm slimmer now.) I'd be interested in meeting someone in this city for drinks and to hang out occasionally.

 

I'll admit it up front: I'm lonely. I've gotten along better with them overall than with straight men or women. I'm in NY only for only about half of each month during the spring, since I work elsewhere also. I've tried to make female friends, but no luck, and haven't met any men I'm interested in. I've had few gay friends in the past,

I predict this post will receive some negative responses, but some people here do, after all, have female friends. So I thought I'd get it a try.

 

Happy v-day, everyone.

 

Edit: PK suggested that I add my age and interests. I'm in my 30s and an academic by trade. I like to read, especially about 20th century history. Other than that, I like all the normal things: Eating out, music, etc. I'm a light drinker (but not a teetotaler) since the taste doesn't agree with me.

[josephga]

To bad you don't live in Atlanta. id hang out with you

[+ FreshFluff]

Thanks, Joseph! I'd be happy to hang out with you too.

[+ purplekow]

If this is legitimate, I see no reason for you get grief. We are all a little bit lonely sometimes and a new friend can be just the ticket to kick starting a strong social life.

To my mind, you look quite young and my guess is that you would like a friend about your own age and with similar interests. Adding that information here might elicit some stronger replies.

Good luck with this venture.

[+ FreshFluff]

Thanks for the sympathy, PK. I appreciate it. I'm absolutely sincere.

 

I'm not that young; I'm in my 30s. I've been dating mostly older men, and I'm also comfortable with older friends. Whether the person is an escort or client is not important.

[+ azdr0710]

you've been posting for a good while here and your posts have been helpful and literate...so I presume some NYers may chat you up......the more militant members around here may get negative, I suppose....

 

have you also considered groups that interest you within meetup.com?...volunteering?....I'm sure you know all this.....

[doitb4ugo]

I wish you luck....you have been a very positive poster here....If I could find a female friend to talk to as a gay man (closeted) I would feel very fortunate.

[maxwellissmart]

Thanks for the sympathy, PK. I appreciate it. I'm absolutely sincere.

 

I'm not that young; I'm in my 30s. I've been dating mostly older men, and I'm also comfortable with older friends. Whether the person is an escort or client is not important.

 

Ooooh. I like me some older men. And where else are you based, Freshly Fluffed?

[+ FreshFluff]

Thanks, Az and Doit. Azdr, I have tried various types of events, but it's just tough for me to make friends. It's even harder since I go back and forth during part of the year.

 

As far as partners go, it's especially tough since I can only be attracted to a particular type. People are always wondering why I'm not partnered, and that's probably why. Another reason is that I never learned the tricks to making men feel good (compliments etc.) that other women have.

[+ FreshFluff]

Ooooh. I like me some older men. And where else are you based, Freshly Fluffed?

 

Yep, I understand! I'm in the midwest. Because I've already given out a lot of info, I'm trying to avoid identifying myself. :o I'm nowhere near DC though.

[maxwellissmart]

Yep, I understand! I'm in the midwest. Because I've already given out a lot of info, I'm trying to avoid identifying myself. :o I'm nowhere near DC though.

 

The MIDWEST???

 

Well, it's obvious you're Madeleine Stowe. I loved "Last Of The Mohicans," by the way.

[+ FreshFluff]

Nah, I'm Judy Garland.

 

Now that I think of it, someone once told me I looked like Stowe. Then again, I get told I look like just about everyone.

[RexAll]

Ok- just some suggestions- church- and if you think you get along better with us- possibly a gay or all inclusive church- tried taking any enrichment or hobby classes? Several years ago I made some great friends by taking a community acting class- and none of them were gay.

 

 

Another reason is that I never learned the tricks to making men feel good (compliments etc.) that other women have.

 

Why make it a trick? How hard is it to listen to us- most men love to talk about themselves- both straight and gay-- and ask some questions about our hobbies- background- where we grew up- things we do in our spare time- hopes, wishes, dreams. And if he's any kind of decent guy- he ought to be interested in those kind of things from you. Unless of course he is just sitting there astounded by his good fortune in having a date with you ( I can tell you are really pretty from your picture- if I were straight you'd be waaaay out of my league, and I'd just be sitting there staring in adoration).

 

Rex

[+ FreshFluff]

Rexall, first of all, thanks for the compliment. My situation is somewhat similar to Gareth's: The pool of men I'm attracted to is pretty small. The good part is that my ideal is different from most women's, but there still aren't many of them. I've met a few of them, including one who's incredible. While they like me a lot at first, I end up pushing them away. (The reason? In short, it's the opposite of the usual "too clingy.")

 

I've tried drawing from a larger pool, but it's hard to get excited about these guys, and they always know it.

 

You're right about listening: I'm still working on that. I sometimes reflexively interrupt, no matter how interested I am.

 

As far as why "tricks" are needed: Getting a guy is all about making him feel good about himself* and making him feel he can please you. I spent a lot of time complimenting the stuff that truly attracted me: "Oh, I love that you're incredibly brilliant." They always deflect that, because they're used to hearing it. Instead, it's best to compliment people on their lesser known qualities, and you have to hit just the right note--sincere and believable. It's incredibly hard to do. Ever seen those plain women who somehow marry incredibly powerful men who could have anyone? It's usually because they have this skill down.

 

Regarding meeting friends, I've tried secular religious events, but honestly, they're kind of boring and I've never met anyone good there. I may try a meetup--thanks for reminding me of that.

[orbital sander]

Rexall, first of all, thanks for the compliment. My situation is somewhat similar to Gareth's: The pool of men I'm attracted to is pretty small. The good part is that my ideal is different from most women's, but there still aren't many of them. I've met a few of them, including one who's incredible. While they like me a lot at first, I end up pushing them away. (The reason? In short, it's the opposite of the usual "too clingy.")

 

I've tried drawing from a larger pool, but it's hard to get excited about these guys, and they always know it.

 

You're right about listening: I'm still working on that. I sometimes reflexively interrupt, no matter how interested I am.

 

As far as why "tricks" are needed: Getting a guy is all about making him feel good about himself* and making him feel he can please you. I spent a lot of time complimenting the stuff that truly attracted me: "Oh, I love that you're incredibly brilliant." They always deflect that, because they're used to hearing it. Instead, it's best to compliment people on their lesser known qualities, and you have to hit just the right note--sincere and believable. It's incredibly hard to do. Ever seen those plain women who somehow marry incredibly powerful men who could have anyone? It's usually because they have this skill down.

 

Regarding meeting friends, I've tried secular religious events, but honestly, they're kind of boring and I've never met anyone good there. I may try a meetup--thanks for reminding me of that.

 

Keep trying, it is a numbers game. If you are a decent person, someone eventually will click with you.

 

Have a nice weekend, and take care!

[Irtwo]

FreshFluff, thanks for posting in here. I hsd no idea you were a woman from previous posts (and I imagine you night be the only one). It's interesting to get a female's view on some of the topcs.

[orbital sander]

FreshFluff, thanks for posting in here. I hsd no idea you were a woman from previous posts (and I imagine you night be the only one). It's interesting to get a female's view on some of the topcs.

 

Don't be so sure, there have been others (actual) women here before, and I would bet that one or two here might be "cloaked"...

[nate_sf]

If you were visiting San Francisco I'd happily hang out with you. I've enjoyed your posts here too. Wrong side of the country, damn!

[raulgmanzo]

I can tel you for sure there are at least a few other women lurkers and posters.

Though seemingly a small minority.

 

FreshFluff, thanks for posting in here. I hsd no idea you were a woman from previous posts (and I imagine you night be the only one). It's interesting to get a female's view on some of the topcs.

[+ FreshFluff]

Nate, in fact, I am in the SF area sometimes, but not really in SF itself. Ever get to the burbs?

 

Raul, interesting about the other women lurking here. I'm curious: Are these women who are interested in hiring?

[+ FreshFluff]

Well, I finally went out to a lounge in the meatpacking district last night. I ended up being invited to the table of some European guys who are here for fashion week. I really tried to get into the guy who was talking to me, but I just couldn't. As someone said earlier, the heart wants what it wants.

[bigvalboy]

Well, I finally went out to a lounge in the meatpacking district last night. I ended up being invited to the table of some European guys who are here for fashion week. I really tried to get into the guy who was talking to me, but I just couldn't. As someone said earlier, the heart wants what it wants.

 

Don't be discouraged, keep trying. As they say in Real Estate...it's a numbers game. Eventually you will strike 'Gold', but you have to keep trying....good luck!!

[raulgmanzo]

...Raul, interesting about the other women lurking here. I'm curious: Are these women who are interested in hiring?

 

In at least two cases YES.

And in at least those cases they are apparently real women.

[+ FreshFluff]

Don't be discouraged, keep trying. As they say in Real Estate...it's a numbers game. Eventually you will strike 'Gold', but you have to keep trying....good luck!!

 

Thanks, Val. I have a relative in that biz too. There's also another guy (let's call him Relatively Wealthy), but he's a bit too "alternative" for me. For example, he has a diamond earring in one of his photos, and his hair is somewhat long. I really prefer a clean cut look.

 

And....I'm going to try for an apology package to Mr. Ideal, whom I was stupid enough to offend. I'm creating that package now, and I'll let you know how that goes when it happens.

[Lookin]

Well, I finally went out to a lounge in the meatpacking district last night. I ended up being invited to the table of some European guys who are here for fashion week.

You weren't at the prince's table, were you?

 

Monaco prince bloodied after brawl in NYC bar