Escorting full time into your 30's/40's and beyond

[Guest WestCoast]

I know that many escorts continue working through their thirties and often well into their forties and I wonder what circumstances have kept them in this profession so long? I am an escort in my very early twenties and while I love the money and more so the wonderful experiences I've had, and the amazing people I've met - this won't be my life's work - at some point in the next few years I will move on.

 

I feel a little guilty for even thinking this but I don't respect "old timers". I know there is a market for these guys (there has to be), but I wonder how it feels to be 40+ and a hooker? - that must be a crippling realization to deal with when it hits them. Did these these guys ever dream of doing anything else with their lives or did they really want prostitution to be their life's work?

 

Just something I wanted to get off my chest as I see more and more older guys move into my market - what are they thinking!!?

[+ bigjoey]

I hire several of these "old" men and the reason "they still work it" is as varried as the reasons some men start doing this:

1)The pay is very good to a hard working escort who takes this seriously. One man in his 40's who has been doing this for over a decade told me that when he retires, he never wants to have to work again; he has done very well financially and does not need to keep doing escort work but in these times, having an extra cushion helps.

 

2)Some men enjoy doing what they do and feel for their clients needs. One man I see understands that he is the only person that some of his older clients have as human contact. For example, he sees one man (who was well known and successful in his day) who now lives in a nursing home (he has Parkinson's); in his mid/late 80's, he has no friends left who visit and no family and not even a pet like a dog, he is totally alone but the escort gives him attention and affection (the nursing staff is very indifferent to him). This particular escort sees a few clients like this and understands how important he is in the lives of these men. This escort travels and these men do not live in his home town but he sees them when he is in their city.

 

3)Some escorts like the attention and affection they get back from their clients (I know actors who feel the same way when they get the applause at the end of a performance). Some escorts do not have many friends or family that are close and their clients can become their friends or family and fill a need in their life. A good escort builds up a core of "regulars" and it is those clients who can become part of the escort's emotional support group. Some escorts enjoy making other people happy and that is a turn on for them.

 

4) Once you have been in a field for over a decade, it becomes a way of life, and you just keep doing it. In the non-escort world, how many people continue in a career or field out of habit? Some escorts enjoy being an escort and can not imagine doing anything else. And yes, some escorts can "burn out" just as a worker in any field can have "job burn out" but as long as a person has job satisfaction, why not continue at the job.?

 

5)You apparently do not feel good about being a "hooker" but others do not feel it is any different than being an insurance agent or bookkeeper. Is it any more "crippling" to wake up at 45 or 55 and discover yourself unhappy in a mindless job? You are putting on a value judgement that does not belong there. Does the 45 or 55 year old insurance agent or bookkeeper ever dream of doing something else? Did the 45 or 55 year old insurance agent or bookkeeper ever start out to have a dead end job as their life's work?

 

6)You are defining the escort by his work (like defining a man who is an insurance agent or bookkeeper by his work) and forgetting that many escorts have a full and productive life outside of their work.

 

And yes, there is a market out there for the more mature and experienced escort. I prefer them to the escort who is in his early 20's who does not know what he is doing and not take the "job" seriously. Some of the "older" escorts have great people skills, social skills and sexual skills that only come from years of experience. As for looks, an "older" man can be very "hot"; one escort I see in his mid-40's has gotten picked up at my gym by young early 20-somethings still in college as he is drop dead handsome and a walking wet dream. Besides, it is not "your" market; you need to earn your place in the marketplace.

[Luv2play]

BJ, your post is very thoughtful and insightful and reflects my thoughts pretty well on the subject of older escorts. The OP's use of the word "hooker"conjurs up many stereotypes, the worst of which is the drugged out street hooker of either sex plying their trade for their next fix. Given the limited life expectancy associated with this type of activity, it is no wonder people harbour negative thoughts of such people.

 

You on the other hand, have given examples of men who fulfill a need in people's lives, people who for one reason or another find themselves isolated and still needing human companionship. As long as there is this need and people willing to meet it, the career prospects for older escorts appear bright. As the baby boomers age, I can only see this market expanding.

 

I too tend to avoid younger escorts and now prefer those in their 30's and 40's. Even those in their 50's, if they have kept their looks, are appealing to me. Of course I am not getting any younger and all things are relative. What seemed "old" to me twenty years ago no longer does.

 

The OP needs to look himself in the mirror and ask whether his expectations are realistic. He is in his early 20's and has embarked on a career of escorting. He says he expects to "move on" before he gets too old. But what will he move on to? Does he have a college degree or other qualification to expect a professional income equal to what he is making now? How will he explain his 10 or 15 year absence from the traditional workplace. Who will give him a job reference when he is 30 or 35?

 

I assume most male escorts leave the profession by mid life or earlier. Some make a good transition but others flounder, particularly those who get into drugs or alcohol. We have concrete examples here in this forum of escorts who have ended badly and sometimes well before their middle years. I know several personally who are in difficult straits or worse, dead.

 

Life is always about making choices and some choose wisely and others less so. We all live with the consequences of our choices, for better or worse. It take time and the perspective of age to appreciate fully these consequences. The OP is in no position to do so, IMO.

[Greathands]

West Coast ... your post clearly indicates that you consider yourself to be a hooker. That speaks volumes about you and your attitude about what you do. I would not expect you to make this your life's work.

 

On the contrary, there are many quality ESCORTS on here who will have successful careers for as long as they would like.

[best hotel]

...i love an older daddy escort....and i am sure there are alot more like me....i wish more of the retired guys would come out of retirement...surely we can make it worth it for them

[Guest Spanky]

Successful escorts in their 30s and 40s (and yes beyond) have built up a true expertise in providing comfort, companionship, and sexual fulfillment to men who, in many cases, may have no other avenue to find it. Lots of good examples of this in the prior excellent responses. And we're castigating them why? Because they are in their 40s? Please. Personally, I'll take the 40 something guy that knows what he is doing, can read my non-verbal signals like a fruit bat in a pitch black cave, and can truly focus on making me happy versus the 20 something numbnut that thinks he can whack me off for a couple hundred bucks and then snicker with contempt at "that old fag" on his way out the door. I'm sorry, but THAT guy doesn't get my money, he get a swift kick in the ass with a cold steel-tipped boot.

 

Plus, older guys are just hot. I've got visuals of four late 30s/40s escorts that could smoke the hell out of just about any 25 year old guy out there.

[JT Brooklyn]

Money Honey! It's a GOOD PAYING JOB and those that do it WELL find it easier to do it LONGER.

 

Being your own BOSS isn't a bad perk either! Some "Mature Clients" can only relate to other Mature Guys..Hence the "Older Working Guy Market" does well.

 

BUT the "Mature Working Guy Bar" has been set by.."Derek Steel" This Guy just gets better & Better! Many Young'un have fallen by the wayside! LOL

[NYTomcat]

Nothing personal but when im hiring for the perfect experience. I want the Guy who has been around and knows how to deliver it. I dont really want a Guy under 30 and in fact at least a couple I have hired are older than me. Then again I Never hire hookers. I hire escorts there Is a difference.

[+ Oliver]

I hire several of these "old" men ...You apparently do not feel good about being a "hooker" ... there is a market out there for the more mature and experienced escort. I prefer them to the escort who is in his early 20's who does not know what he is doing and not take the "job" seriously. (Most) of the "older" escorts have great people skills, social skills and sexual skills that only come from years of experience ... Besides, it is not "your" market; you need to earn your place in the marketplace.

 

I also prefer to be with the "mature" escort for the reasons that most have stated. In fact my best experiences have been with men who have not entered this line of work until their thirties or even forties. They come into it with a wealth of knowledge and experience which makes them interesting people aside from being totally hot. And they are doing so because they like it and love sex.

[+ Charlie]

WestCoast, I think you may be too young to understand why I would prefer to hire someone older than you.

[Juan Vancouver]

Hey WestCoast,

 

Even if I strongly disagree with some of BigJoey's possible reasons, I wholeheartedly agree with a few of them:

 

Because it is an incredibly flexible source of income that allows a talented man to decide his own life as he pleases to live it.

 

Because there is a huge and growing market for experienced escort/coaches. People more and more understand that a good escort cannot only be enjoyed, but learnt from. In this kind of market, experience makes you more and more valuable.

 

Because there is a way to do this work in a healthy way. The same way a nurse or a therapist could potentially keep doing the same work for as long as they want without burning out, without wanting to quit, just enjoying their work.

 

And also, (May God forbid!) because there are some people who love their jobs, find it incredibly fulfilling, understand the deep and important contribution that they are making doing this job, and because it is a fun job.

 

I only recently entered the 30's market, so perhaps I am not the best to answer, but I am in no rush to "quit".

 

Often people talk about "retiring" from escorting as if it is some pressing matter. Both escort and people who know escorts love asking "And do you know what are you going to do afterwards?". They often (escorts included) talk about quitting as if escorting were a nasty, pointless, annoying even if slightly fun habit like smoking. The consensus is that one should leave it when it is not too late and that only reflects the poor opinion that they have of it.

 

In my case I have a degree and many other profitable qualifications. I have done extremely well financially before escorting and I still make money from those activities. I could make a shitload from those activities if I put my mind to it, and yet I am choosing to keep escorting.

 

Why?

 

Because I like it.

 

I have noticed that my ability to make money through escorting grows and grows with time. I have noticed that more profitable and more challenging sessions become the rule and I don't feel like quitting just yet. My other professions await, people call me now and then asking me if I have stopped traveling and I am ready to go back "to work", but I am not. Not yet.

 

 

While this is not what you asked, I would like to address something. You seem like a young guy, intelligent and full of life. It is also quite evident by the way you wrote your post that there is a lot of angst, a lot of anger, shame, and a vague sense of disempowerment. (Please forgive me if I am presumptuous in making these assumptions, and feel absolutely free to say that I am full of shit. I have no fear to be set right.) If these emotions are in any way related to or originated by escorting, I would sincerely recommend to quit immediately. No amount of money is worth your peace of mind.

 

If you, however, like escorting and you just feel conflicted because of other people's perception of it, then do whatever you can to come to good terms with it and put your mind to make it a fulfilling job. It is possible.

 

Lastly... I am often asked whether I feel threatened by the 19 year old perfect blue/blond wrestling champion 10incher escorting twins. They often ask me how I can compete with them to find clients. Of course, the only answer is "I don't".

 

Yes, they are exquisite. Yes, they are the perfect embodiment of sex and desire for some. I cannot compete against blond/blue monstrously hung twins, but I shouldn't try to, just as they shouldn't try to compete against me. People who lust about me often don't lust about them and vice versa. (There are a few slutty people like myself who lust for both, but that's not the rule. {Did I just owned to lusting after myself in an open forum? [Have I no shame, whatsoever!!??]})

 

Sorry, I have to go deal with something urgently.

 

Power to you!

[Diverdan]

Hey Juan,

Thanks for your excellent insight and commentary on this issue. I have only had the pleasure of your company a few times, and would like it to be more, primarily for the reasons you so cogently point out. Over time the twinks/twins/extra, extra large/ blond-blue eyed/muscles or what ever combination thereof in some escorts are less and less satisfying to me unless there are other attributes that accompany those features. Maybe it is my age, maybe my maturity (and those are not necessarily the same), maybe it is being spoiled by the likes of Juan, David, Andrew and others, it really doesn't make any difference. There are times, places and stages for the many variations of escorts available. Yes, it can be very HOT to have a young, blond, hung, passionate guy to play with, but it is equally HOT to have other variations in age, physique, equipment, etc. I don't see this as competition. We would not want to eat hot dogs, steak or anything else every time we eat! Variety is the spice of life and over time we end up enjoying some things and some people more than others. So, what ever your role/job/station in life might be, enjoy it to the fullest, have some balance and if it is not satisfying find something and others that will make it so.

[orbital sander]

I have no problem with someone being older, I just want them to be HONEST and not try to tell me they are 40 when they are really pushing 60. If they lie about that, then what else will they lie about? I have found many guys sexy who are older than me, and they turned out to be more fun than most younger guys...but not always

[Steven_Draker]

Even if I strongly disagree with some of BigJoey's possible reasons

 

Juan, very interesting post. Would you for the sake of the discussion clarify with which points you strongly disagree.

 

Cheers, Steven ~

[Guest WestCoast]

Just to clarify: I love escorting.. I have absolutely no shame (right now) - there is nothing I would rather be doing. I became successful very early on and things have only grown from there. I've had several amazing clients that I no longer see as clients because they have become my close friends (I would have never met them otherwise) - I've definitely been blessed. I don't consider myself a "hooker" in a street walker/drug user sense but that's what we all are.. you can mask it however you want but we are prostitutes - which I think is something fun (although I do take it very seriously) to do while I'm young but if I was still doing this in five years I think I would feel differently for some reason (I may be wrong). Being a prostitute isn't exactly something you can tell your family about (although that's just an example).

 

Also, I'm not threatened by these older guys - I know we cater to totally different markets.

 

Juan - I think it's great that you have a degree and other qualifications so that if you some day you want to move on you have that option.

[JT Brooklyn]

Juan.."Watch It The Bait is Out"! LOL

[Epigonos]

It is also a fact that many "older" escorts had successful and interesting careers PRIOR to entering escorting. "Many" are highly educated. Additionally many of these "older" escorts have invested wisely and don't really need to escort out of financial necessity. For all of these reasons I NOT only find these guys more interesting sexually but definitely more interesrtng intellectually.

 

One great thing about the clients, who post, on this site is that we are attracted to MANNY different types of escorts. Thank god we are not all attracted to the same guys. If we were I would have a hell of a time getting together with guys I find attractive and interesting. VIVE LE DIFFERENCE

[Okliehomo]

What are they thinking???

 

Well, for the most part, I think it's "nice work, if you can get it." And good for them. And us.

 

And the ones I know have worked their asses off and other parts that go way beyond the physical to build a business, a clientele... see the difference? A hooker has "johns" while an escort has "clients"... hence the word. Now, I know this all depends upon how you hold your mouth.... so much does, in life, really.

 

I have been at this a relatively long time now. I was 42 when I started and now I am almost 52. Ten years. So, all those hot guys that I met (most of whom were all 29 when I met them.... ???) have to be at least 39 by now.... and I know for a fact that 29 in escort years usually means 32-36 (notable exceptions).... so, do the math on that?

 

For, instance... my Marco... pretty sure he was 32 when I met him 8 years ago.... and he is still fucking perfect, as of last Monday night. Better and sexier than he was at 32. (Being a man does have it's perks....) and frankly, I think, as men age, they get more masculine (well, not me)..... but seriously, I like men, not boys or twinks... so, these 40 year olds still have a claim in this market......

 

I guess, my real point is that all the true greats are smart enough to have been making other plans because they are all too aware that there is a relatively small window of opportunity in this, their chosen life... but the truth is, that window for some of us clients allows them to extend their working lives into their 30's and 40's.... easily. No worries.

 

Maybe, that's because as we age, they still look so young?.... Maybe, they are our mirror and no matter what, they will never be as old as we are?? Always younger.....

 

I, for one, still appreciate the view... looking up... there it is..... yum.

 

Okie

[Diverdan]

HEY OKIE... right on... I have much the same experience and appreciate the wide variation in age, looks, experience that is available. I have had some incredible experiences with guys in their 20s, 30s, 40s and yes, even one who was over 50. A lot depends on one's outlook on life, how they take care of themselves and what interests they have. I hope all the posters here age well and continue to enjoy all that life has to offer.

Dan

[jackhammer91406]

With all due respect to the original poster...

 

Since you are not using your escort name and do not have a link to any of your ads, I don't know you and we are not likely to ever meet, but I have some advice for you...

 

You mention you have no respect for the older escorts and wonder how they must feel to be stuck in such a demeaning profession ( I am paraphrasing but that was certainly what you meant.) That thinking presupposes that you have no respect for yourself since you are in the same profession. Age doesn't make the profession more acceptable to society, in case you haven't noticed.

It is that kind of thinking that persuades me that I would rather spend some time with a MAN who has some seasoning and some life experience under his belt ...excuse the expression. What makes a MAN sexy is not just what's in his shorts but what's in his head and heart as well. I have hired some young men who have wisdom uncommon to their peer group and they have been great fun. I think there are many clients who draw from all ages for their entertainment. The reason you would not appeal to me has NOTHING to do with your age. it has EVERYTHING to do with your attitude.

 

The other escorts who responded to you have used their professional names and so have some skin in the game as far as this topic of yours is concerned.. I did not notice that you had the same courage.

 

Enjoy the time you have in this profession and perhaps try to learn something about life and yourself in the process.

[Guest Ace]

I wasn't going to post a reply to this thread after my initial reading, but my gut was so irritated by the blatant lack of respect of the "old timers" (as westcoast so nicely put it) & the possible THOUGHT that someone could POSSIBLY want to spend time with someone with a 3 (or dare I say 4 or even 5!!!) as the first digit in their age...

Seeing as how I guess I an now an "old timer" or veteran of not only the escort scene, but this board as well, I thought I would add to what Juan has so PERFECTLY posted.

I continue to escort because I LOVE what I do & I'm good AT it......I've been told MANY times (and have learned in my 5 year career) that the basics of escorting SUCCESSFULLY go way past the sex...

I'm just back from a KILLER weekend in Palm Springs & about to head out to Seattle & Portland, so I guess it's not just twinks running things.....(AGAIN to quote Juan: "We cater to two VERY different markets).

I have ALWAYS been a firm believer that we "working boys & MEN" should stick together (networking, referrals, etc)....There's plenty to go around.

To put it in musical terms....Lady GaGa & Paul McCartney BOTH make music......for two VERY different markets, yet I'm SURE there is a degree of "professional courtesy" amongst the two.

[jimboivyo]

Your market? That's pretty ballsy of you to say considering the way you see yourself in this 'hooking' business. Kid, it isn't YOUR market and if you had experienced one iota of success in doing it, you wouldn't have even thought to post this nonsense. I'm not going to waste my time going point to point like some already have, but you've certainly got a lot to learn. Youth truly is wasted on the young.

[+ David-SF]

Big hug

 

Jimboivyo my thoughts exactly [video=youtube;O2Zwvyhms8c]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2Zwvyhms8c

[+ purplekow]

David if you are a pizza, you are one with extra sausage and meatballs Hmmmm sausage.

[instudiocity]

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