Hiring in 2026 - is it too much trouble?

[DunwoodyGuy]

On 2/26/2026 at 9:16 PM, Rudynate said:

Mostly A4A.

Here's your answer then: STOP USING A4A.

[Mark_fl]

9 hours ago, JB_Studio38 said:

People like that are why I require deposits. $50 for outcall and $100 for me to host. 

Can you explain the difference? I would  have expected more to travel since you have expenses to cover if he isn't real or sends you on a wild goose chase.

[Rudynate]

15 hours ago, DunwoodyGuy said:

Here's your answer then: STOP USING A4A.

Why, I never would have thought of that.  Thanks so much.

[JB_Studio38]

17 hours ago, DunwoodyGuy said:

Here's your answer then: STOP USING A4A.

Although it’s not the best site, I still meet clients from there from time to time (the ones who contact me 1st, I don’t contact them first) It’s not as tedious to find them as it used to be, it’s just now it is quieter and not as many people reaching out…but in a way it’s good because it’s less Timewasters than places like the hookup apps are.

ADAM 4 ADAM is very city dependent. Some cities are okay for it, others suck. I used to find it okay in San Francisco, but as the hookup “apps” (adam4adam also has an app) have come on the scene, its popularity has dropped.

Some of the smaller cities, aren’t broken down into enough neighborhoods. But it’s about the same as RentMen.

But at $30 a month, it’s stayed affordable. I would like clients to use it more, because it can be useful if you are willing to filter. It used to attract a lot of shady types, but many of those have now moved on to the other apps lol.

 

16 hours ago, Mark_fl said:

Can you explain the difference? I would  have expected more to travel since you have expenses to cover if he isn't real or sends you on a wild goose chase.

In my case, hosting requires me to rent a suite most of the time. That’s added expenses. Also, I have to drive usually outside of where I stay, to get to that hotel in the first place. So hosting is usually more expenses for me, versus $10-$50 gas going to the next town/state over.

Edited 19 hours ago by JB_Studio38

[DunwoodyGuy]

6 hours ago, JB_Studio38 said:

I would like clients to use it more, because it can be useful if you are willing to filter.

Okay, I will! What's your name there?

[BeHappy]

I have been thinking of rejoining A4A again!  Hopefully, it’s improved as you say!  
Thank you for providing your view points!

Edited 13 hours ago by BeHappy

[marylander1940]

On 2/26/2026 at 12:32 PM, Rudynate said:

Has anyone else encountered this?  The process of hiring a provider just becomes more and more complicated.  More and more, I'm encountering guys who insist on cashless, anonymized transactions - e.g.  gift cards or crypto.  They want advance payment in full prior to the appointment.  If you go to their place, there are detailed instructions about that - call on your phone, don't knock or use the doorbell, etc. etc.  There are more and more conditions and stipulations.  The whole thing has become a complicated, joyless business process. 

I've encountered in the last years some pushiness when it comes to precise ETA and "where are you?". etc. 

I understand in this era of "burner phones" that some providers might consider asking for a deposit from new clients but paying upfront is big NO and a nonstarter. 

I understand the need for some instructions like: "text me when you leave", "text me when you get off the metro/subway" and "text me when you're downstairs". That to me seems to be common sense, easy to follow rules. We should be grateful that technology allows us all this way of communicating and be troubled by them. 

You can always hope someone is hosting at a town house and just knock on his door if all of this truly bothers you. 

Let's do not forget about the loser in the front desk getting paid minimum wage and finally reaching power over others 😂 being mean to folks walking into the lobby. 

As someone who has lived in other countries, I have always found frustrating why calling an apartment from downstairs sometimes could be tricky and in need of instructions as it is in the USA. In some countries you click on the apartment number and a specific phone like device will ring in that apartment for whoever is there to ask who you are and allow you into the building.

[marylander1940]

On 2/26/2026 at 9:16 PM, Rudynate said:

Mostly A4A.

The new Craigslist/BP!

[JB_Studio38]

4 hours ago, DunwoodyGuy said:

Okay, I will! What's your name there?

JarrodBrandonXXX

 

3 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

I've encountered in the last years some pushiness when it comes to precise ETA and "where are you?". etc. 

I understand in this era of "burner phones" that some providers might consider asking for a deposit from new clients but paying upfront is big NO and a nonstarter. 

I understand the need for some instructions like: "text me when you leave", "text me when you get off the metro/subway" and "text me when you're downstairs". That to me seems to be common sense, easy to follow rules. We should be grateful that technology allows us all this way of communicating and be troubled by them. 

You can always hope someone is hosting at a town house and just knock on his door if all of this truly bothers you. 

Let's do not forget about the loser in the front desk getting paid minimum wage and finally reaching power over others 😂 being mean to folks walking into the lobby. 

As someone who has lived in other countries, I have always found frustrating why calling an apartment from downstairs sometimes could be tricky and in need of instructions as it is in the USA. In some countries you click on the apartment number and a specific phone like device will ring in that apartment for whoever is there to ask who you are and allow you into the building.

I know the OP lives in San Francisco, so that in itself can make things a bit more complex. A dense city with labyrinth like buildings, sometimes 3 layers of security (gate to park, key to enter, key for hotel probably too). I definitely find those things can be annoying, but it’s also why I try to pick simple places to host.

Since I have always driven into San Francisco, that’s been important. If I have to do a million things before I can get up to my room, that’s just doing too much…and I’m sure a client would be flustered also

[marylander1940]

3 hours ago, JB_Studio38 said:

JarrodBrandonXXX

 

I know the OP lives in San Francisco, so that in itself can make things a bit more complex. A dense city with labyrinth like buildings, sometimes 3 layers of security (gate to park, key to enter, key for hotel probably too). I definitely find those things can be annoying, but it’s also why I try to pick simple places to host.

Since I have always driven into San Francisco, that’s been important. If I have to do a million things before I can get up to my room, that’s just doing too much…and I’m sure a client would be flustered also

Gate to park?

Most hotels required a key card to go up in the elevator, a few in some areas of San Francisco at night might require key card to get into the hotel's lobby at night.

I hope you're not suggesting motels south of Market in the area that hasn't been gentrified yet. I saw someone there once and I'm glad I didn't get bedbugs. 

Many "luxury rentals" have a system where the guest gives you a passcode for the door to open. No big deal is a matter of paying simple attention. Obviously I need to know before heading over to which apartment / room number I'm going and the password to enter. Do I have to dial #701 and call or just #701? do I need to look up his name in the directory? etc. Just common-sense details upfront.

I do agree with the OP about the pushiness for an ETA and the constant need to reply by text to their demands right away.... but I don't think these new technologies have made our lives more difficult, they have enabled folks to give a code for someone to coming and pick up the dog for a walk among other things. 

[JB_Studio38]

11 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

The new Craigslist/BP!

 

…I posted this the other day, in reference to the post about the doctor and the “thug”.

I think the deeper context of this should be posted, otherwise it sounds too cliché. But I don’t think it’s a good way to describe Adam 4 Adam. Not everybody on Adam is a dog. I met a client couple months ago from Adam, who gave me 2 hour’s worth of “time” and paid for me a separate hotel room where he was staying, on top of it. Like I said…just takes a bit of weeding and filtering 

Edited 16 minutes ago by JB_Studio38