What do you think of this as a business practice?

[Leyte2019]

Would you like to start a thread about seducing straight men?

 

Haha I'm a bit out of practice, but the str8 men i'm talking about would require little in the way of seduction. More like a beer or two, perhaps a shot of Rumplemintz for the more resistant.

[marylander1940]

Haha I'm a bit out of practice, but the str8 men i'm talking about would require little in the way of seduction. More like a beer or two, perhaps a shot of Rumplemintz for the more resistant.

 

Start a thread about it, I'll share my Navy experience. I don't want to hijack this thread.

 

Back to subject! I love this post by @KinkyNEguy !

 

As a client, I am often irritated by the many different restrictions on potential communications between myself and a potential provider. Some say do not call, text only, others say no emails, some say only emails no text. Etc Etc. All the while I grumble, "but wait...don't you want my custom?"

 

Recently I found some very expensive but poorly chosen bespoke computer equipment ( at the time in 2010 $5k per system) in my closet that I was going to put on the curb. My Husband, after making some choice comments on my judgement, persuaded me to try out eBay and sell the parts. I have never even bought anything on ebay.

 

Without going into boring details, after setting what I thought were reasonable very discounted prices based on similar items for sale, I have been bombarded with a torrent of emails which I initially started to dutifully respond. But it is never ending, some people dickering over $1.00 on a $20 component, pointing out the most insignificant variance. On the times I just acquiesced and said fine your price- they didn't even buy it then!

 

Perhaps many/most are well intentioned and just need a little information, but it is overwhelming. The irony is I can't imagine if these emails were over something so personal as companionship or sex! It has been an educational experience for me. I guess I am a bit sheltered in not having this experience before. In my company, people only email me with inquiries that are well thought out and I don't have to go back and forth so often. A call really can weed out the chafe and get to the point. The second computer is going straight to our local tech school...maybe someone there can do something with it, but I won't be taking that one apart.

 

Thanks to all who endure us

[+ Pensant]

These discussions make me cringe.

 

When i reach out to someone i almost always propose a date and time in my first message and inquire about a 2/3-hour amount in my second.

Occasionally the amount is more than I’m comfortable with and I politely decline and thank him for his time.

 

There have been a few occasions when someone asks for a counter-proposal and I get really uncomfortable with anything remotely resembling haggling. My rationale is that if either of us feels the least bit cheated - too little or too much - then the time together may have an undercurrent of resentment and be less than stellar. This is an unfortunate lose/lose. I don’t know of any way to turn this situation around.

@Keith30309 you make good points. Maybe it’s me, but if I am excited by the prospect of spending a few hours with a provider and he quotes something that I’m not comfortable with, I politely demur, which often leads to a compromise that works for both of us. I’ve never worried about, or discerned, any sense of resentment on his part in these cases. I’m fact, recently they’ve led to return engagements. Of course, I’m not a low-baller by any means. This just hasn’t been a problem for me.

[rogerG]

But I can tell you there are still penniless straight guys who will unzip or more for 100.

I can attest to that. More and more, some straight guys don't care about the mouth sucking their cock, as long as it's getting sucked well. Just don't try to kiss them.

 

Regardless of what you see in porn, a lot of women hate sucking cock, especially large cock. A lot of women complain about hating pre-cum. It can make them gag.

[Leyte2019]

I can attest to that. More and more, some straight guys don't care about the mouth sucking their cock, as long as it's getting sucked well. Just don't try to kiss them.

 

Regardless of what you see in porn, a lot of women hate sucking cock, especially large cock. A lot of women complain about hating pre-cum. It can make them gag.

 

Yes, that was the case way back when in my youth.

[+ Pensant]

I remember two girls giving me road head when I was young. They seemed to savor it.

[rogerG]

I remember two girls giving me road head when I was young. They seemed to savor it.

There is no shortage of women who love cock, and love the cock on their man. There has been talk about the world turning gay, but you probably shouldn't take a comedian's act too seriously.

[Mocha]

But I can tell you there are still penniless straight guys who will unzip or more for 100. Harder to find these days, but still available.

 

I had a 3 way last night with 2 non-penniless straight-ish guys last night lol. At the end, one of the guys said, I have a boyfriend and a girlfriend, so let’s keep this between us....

 

Then he said something about wanting to have a 3 way live in relationship. I was like bro...you should think about moving to Utah lol

 

Don't worry @latbear4blk does bargain and allegedly very few times paid more than 200 but he'll offer a ride to his place in exchange.

 

Not taking sides, but I can attest I am one of the ones he dropped more than 200 for, and there was no haggling on his behalf.

 

However, being familiar with Latin Culture, “bargaining” is not as looked down upon than it is here in the states. Different cultural norms shouldn’t be classed as “haggling”.

 

[+ azdr0710]

well, look's like it's time for my semi-annual posting of this classic.....

 

[Mocha]

The Op was very polite in telling the escort that his rate was too high and thanks anyways. The escort could have walked away but he was the one to make a "counter offer" first by asking how much the provider could do. The client then told the escort his budget and the escort agreed to the rate and if the client could meet soon which the client could. I don't see how could the escort essentially cancel 30 minutes before the appointment, at that point he should have gone through the meeting and just reschedule and or answer the 2nd client after he was finished. Ultimately these situations are always tricky and I cannot tell another escort how to ruin their own business, escorts can accept or deny appointments as well as clients I just wish the escort went about canceling after taking another offer in a better way.

 

That’s all true, but I’ve heard from time to time before on sites like Adam: “Thanks, but I’m going to stick to my regular guy who does my massage for $60, AND he fucks me afterwards”. Or any variation of that, generally along those lines. Im tempted to follow up, “that’s fine, my regular client who pays me $300 will be happy to see me”.

 

So sometimes, clients get to feel the sting of rejection from the other end too. Shoe on the other foot, so to speak. It’s a dick move on both sides (using someone else’s prices or payment in a passive aggressive manner in an attempt to express their anger for being unable to get someone to submit to their requests), but it’s not assumed that everyone advertising or looking is morally literate.

[+ MakeMeCowboy]

Who else thinks the OP really did want to haggle? I don’t believe the “I don’t want to haggle” line as you immediately negotiated and then are upset when he dumped you at your low ball price. Just sayin’

 

From a client point of view, the OP was definitely opening price negotiations. As for the provider... we don't really know why he cancelled and making assumptions are traps for those who need to feel like they've made sense of chaos.

 

We all need to accept that bad behavior exists on both sides of the client/provider coin and learn to treat it like water off of a duck's back.

[marylander1940]

 

 

Not taking sides, but I can attest I am one of the ones he dropped more than 200 for, and there was no haggling on his behalf.

 

However, being familiar with Latin Culture, “bargaining” is not as looked down upon than it is here in the states. Different cultural norms shouldn’t be classed as “haggling”.

 

 

you got lucky.... He brags about not paying as much as others.

 

Btw Latin culture of bargaining? I never heard such a thing.

[Walker1]

I wonder if the escort was trying to squeeze the client. Maybe he thought 30 min before the appointment , just when the client was aroused and waiting would be a good time to squeeze and egt the full amount.

 

I usually don't negotiate, but never have I paid 100 bucks on top . So just odd story, I think escort probably expected the OP to come back and say ok I will pay you full price and that is it and he would have accepted. Perhaps he was expecting OP to think with his little dick.

[jawjateck]

Back in the day, I proposed a meeting, location and duration, then received a quote. If I was really into the guy, I accepted and had a great time, almost every time. Now, the majority of discussions involve a negotiation and with it, I have experienced a corresponding decline in performance by companions and satisfaction by me.

 

Yes, I long for the good old days.

[Aaron_Bauder]

My rationale is that if either of us feels the least bit cheated - too little or too much - then the time together may have an undercurrent of resentment and be less than stellar. This is an unfortunate lose/lose. I don’t know of any way to turn this situation around.

 

Assumptions are almost always a dead end, especially ones based on fear. The way to turn it around is to stop assuming all escorts will feel cheated and resentful by negotiations.

 

As usual, vet the reviews. If an escort has 30+ good reviews, really think *none* of those five star encounters involved some price variation? Unlikely. A good escort will provide good service, negotiation or not. Someone who cares enough about their reputation to seek reviews is not going to cheat you out of a good experience over a few Lincolns.

 

Many providers won't negotiate, period, so don't bother to. Many others have some wiggle room, so wiggle. Obviously, no client should want a guy who's going shave $100+ off his rate out of desperation. But if client is 80% there, are most non-desperate, solidly-reviewed escorts *really* going to settle for 0%? Then be resentful and petulant over the cost a few Starbucks trips? Please.

 

Fortune favors the bold folks. Stop letting fear and false assumptions dictate.

Edited September 25, 2019 by Aaron_Bauder

[MiamiLooker]

...stop assuming all escorts will feel cheated and resentful by negotiations.

+1

[rogerG]

Obviously, no client should want a guy who's going shave $100+ off his rate out of desperation.

Not all $100 shaves are out of desperation, so please, by all means watch those assumptions. Fortune does favor bolder folks, but it also favors the open minded. I often have no interest in penetration or sustained erections. Sometimes I just want to play with a naked man for an hour. Touching, smelling, licking, bathing, conversing, without doing or demanding anything that requires much exertion. I'm happy to make my budget and simple desires clear. If I convince a high-priced guy that I'm serious about simple, I'm thrilled when he's willing to cut $100 from his fee. The situations where this has happened have always been memorable. Some are happy repeats. One guy called me and told he loved the way I played with his cock, and he offered a better discount because he was horny and wanted to get off with fun. He was staying in my neighborhood. I jumped at the chance. That time I saved $200.

[MrMattBig]

Not all $100 shaves are out of desperation, so please, by all means watch those assumptions. Fortune does favor bolder folks, but it also favors the open minded. I often have no interest in penetration or sustained erections. Sometimes I just want to play with a naked man for an hour. Touching, smelling, licking, bathing, conversing, without doing or demanding anything that requires much exertion. I'm happy to make my budget and simple desires clear. If I convince a high-priced guy that I'm serious about simple, I'm thrilled when he's willing to cut $100 from his fee. The situations where this has happened have always been memorable. Some are happy repeats. One guy called me and told he loved the way I played with his cock, and he offered a better discount because he was horny and wanted to get off with fun. He was staying in my neighborhood. I jumped at the chance. That time I saved $200.

If I may, I don't think Aaron was making that assumption, I believe he was saying when an escort cuts 100+ because of desperation.

Not speaking for him of course, but just how I interpreted what he said. And it does happen because of desperation, even with well known escorts. A previous girlfriend of mine wanted to hire a guy while I was out of town on tour. She contacted an escort who has been discussed here before with positive praise around midnight, and he continued to lower his rate till he was quoting her less than half, and clearly coming off like he was just desperate for the business instead of being horny.

It turned her off so much she just used a toy and went to bed.

[rogerG]

because of desperation

Unless someone says, "I'm desperate," all most of us are left with is assumption. It's not always clearly knowable why or what makes an escort lower his rate when dealing with a particular customer. Sometimes the signals seem very clear by behavior, but other times not. One well known guy once told me, "I'm behind on rent." I knew he didn't have a drug habit, and I also remembered my behind on rent days. Stuff happens. I got a lower rate, had a great time, and he paid his rent. The negotiation worked.

 

No matter what Aaron Bauder's intent, I thought it was important to speak to other assumptions, which can be false. That's all.

[cmennow]

Me - can you please tell me your rates?

Him - $XXX

Me - That is beyond my budget. Thanks anyway.

Him - what are you looking to pay?

Me - My budget is $YYY, but I am not trying to haggle.

I have had similar conversations up to this point and decided to decline if they want to come down to my level but have a cockiness about it. It means to me that they will give you a half ass experience because they feel they are compromising. I have accepted if the vibe is right (whatever my instincts tell me) and have been satisfied.

[Mocha]

Back in the day, I proposed a meeting, location and duration, then received a quote. If I was really into the guy, I accepted and had a great time, almost every time. Now, the majority of discussions involve a negotiation and with it, I have experienced a corresponding decline in performance by companions and satisfaction by me.

 

Yes, I long for the good old days.

 

That’s why in Palm Springs, I had showed you how I go about doing rates now. Since then, I’ve found much less needing to negotiate. It’s like a car wash:

 

You have basic, the works, and then premium. I just wish RentMen and all others would allow more creativity in our rate structures. But I’m not going to wait for them to do it, at some point in life one just has to mann their own ship.

[Mocha]

Not all $100 shaves are out of desperation, so please, by all means watch those assumptions. Fortune does favor bolder folks, but it also favors the open minded. I often have no interest in penetration or sustained erections. Sometimes I just want to play with a naked man for an hour. Touching, smelling, licking, bathing, conversing, without doing or demanding anything that requires much exertion. I'm happy to make my budget and simple desires clear. If I convince a high-priced guy that I'm serious about simple, I'm thrilled when he's willing to cut $100 from his fee. The situations where this has happened have always been memorable. Some are happy repeats. One guy called me and told he loved the way I played with his cock, and he offered a better discount because he was horny and wanted to get off with fun. He was staying in my neighborhood. I jumped at the chance. That time I saved $200.

 

I’m not sure I see what the argument here is about. Everything you’re saying, is basically just saying what @Aaron_Bauder said, but with “exceptions”. Your example is with someone you previously met, who was content with the lesser offer for different reasons than the point Aaron was making.

 

In my opinion, shaving off $100 is not just about the interaction, but clients can also use it to low ball us. “Well my regular so and so charges XXX”.

 

Well, I’m not trying to compete with someone’s regular so and so on a race to the best price. I don’t have to encounter that much on the Rent sites, but adam4adam is notorious for that. And everytime I tell them no. There’s no reason to do all that I do for an appointment, oftentimes requiring booking accommodations, and barely getting a profit...which could be gone by the end of the day if nobody else shows up, which in some cities, is the regular.

[Aaron_Bauder]

Not all $100 shaves are out of desperation, so please, by all means watch those assumptions. Fortune does favor bolder folks, but it also favors the open minded. I often have no interest in penetration or sustained erections. Sometimes I just want to play with a naked man for an hour. Touching, smelling, licking, bathing, conversing, without doing or demanding anything that requires much exertion. I'm happy to make my budget and simple desires clear. If I convince a high-priced guy that I'm serious about simple, I'm thrilled when he's willing to cut $100 from his fee. The situations where this has happened have always been memorable. Some are happy repeats. One guy called me and told he loved the way I played with his cock, and he offered a better discount because he was horny and wanted to get off with fun. He was staying in my neighborhood. I jumped at the chance. That time I saved $200.

 

Your example is not "out of desperation" and not applicable to my statement. I didn't say, "No client wants an escort who will shave $100+ to provide a simpler service."

 

I typically ask clients what they're into and whether they want full escorting or something else. If my escort rate seems exorbitant for the "something else," I do offer a massage-type rate instead. Not out of desperation, or even just fairness alone: many of these clients are now more reliable regulars, meaning I end up with more donations overall.

 

Goes back to the original question of smart/good business practice. I know some escorts think being flexible on rates is a dead end slippery slope, but it works for me. Again, sometimes I'm not in the mood, and no I don't ever sell myself too short or sacrifice my dignity, but why settle for 0% instead of 70%?

 

I have a favorite local healthfoods grocer that noticed I was visiting less and less after a competing big box chain opened up nearby. Owners offered me their pretty significant employee discount. Wasn't until budgeting months later I realized I was spending more there with the discount than I ever had before. Clever!

[+ José Soplanucas]

Your example is not "out of desperation" and not applicable to my statement. I didn't say, "No client wants an escort who will shave $100+ to provide a simpler service."

 

I typically ask clients what they're into and whether they want full escorting or something else. If my escort rate seems exorbitant for the "something else," I do offer a massage-type rate instead. Not out of desperation, or even just fairness alone: many of these clients are now more reliable regulars, meaning I end up with more donations overall.

 

Goes back to the original question of smart/good business practice. I know some escorts think being flexible on rates is a dead end slippery slope, but it works for me. Again, sometimes I'm not in the mood, and no I don't ever sell myself too short or sacrifice my dignity, but why settle for 0% instead of 70%?

 

I have a favorite local healthfoods grocer that noticed I was visiting less and less after a competing big box chain opened up nearby. Owners offered me their pretty significant employee discount. Wasn't until budgeting months later I realized I was spending more there with the discount than I ever had before. Clever!

 

Yes.

 

Clearly the operative word in the statement questioned by @rogerG is "out of desperation". The amount of money is irrelevant, in my opinion. At the very beginning of this thread, I had already pointed out that the red flag to me was not negotiating, but the apparent desperation.

 

Desperation is a clue, it means that negotiating may not be part of the escort's business model. If negotiating is his standard practice, you can expect to receive standard service. If it is not, you do not know what to expect.

 

That is why, when I am counter-offered any discount, of any amount, I never accept when I smell any traces of desperation.

[Mocha]

 

That is why, when I am counter-offered any discount, of any amount, I never accept when I smell any traces of desperation.

 

In that case, next time someone tries to ask me for a discount, of any amount...I might as well decline and assume they are too desperate for some dick to see them ??

 

I learn from the best! ?

 

But on a serious note, I didn’t like how one of my (non escort) friends made a statement of how one of my clients was “sad” for hiring someone while he wearing an ankle bracelet. As if, somehow paying for some dick is desperate, and desperate is “bad” (and let’s be real CLIENTS, the vast majority of NON CLIENTS in this world assume you ALL are desperate because you’re paying for “stuff” to begin with, so let’s not play the desperation card). I told him I don’t give a fuck, he had my money laid out...whatever he’s dealing with isn’t my business or concern. I went there for 2 things: sex and money. But not both together since that’s considered the P word.

 

That’s the problem with people’s ideas surrounding sex work. People assume people are desperate. So the fuck what? Clients are desperate, escorts are desperate. We’re all desperate to a degree. The only reason it’s being judged, is based on whether or not someone displays it. And even then, who cares?

 

When a client texts me asking to meet in 10 minutes, that’s not desperate. But when I email/text a client 3-4 times in a row trying to get some information I need to attend the appointment, I come off as desperate? Hold up..

Edited September 25, 2019 by Mocha