TallMuscl37

True but, I was talking about it as a bigger picture aspect. I know it serves a purpose where gay life is nonexistent or highly risky. I see that myself when I have to spend time in a small town regularly. However: Grindr and company aren’t necessarily the godsend that it APPEARS to be because, they aren’t covering all bases of gay life. And a big part of gay life is being able to sell what you have. I mean, it’s no secret. Big cities like San Francisco and New York are both cities with tons of free and paid sex. I can at least say Adam4Adam did the right thing by allowing providers to promote. However, I think there’s an issue with using an app versus a website that doesn’t allow services. And I still stand by the fact that they hijacked a lot of work from gay sex workers, but have done nothing to reimburse us. They pay us back in the form of banning and restrictions. That’s why I won’t pay them a penny to get “Extra”. So many guys would hit me up on the goodwill app, talking about they’re on business at a hotel and want to get fucked. That used to be a good portion of my bookings: hotel outcalls. I didn’t even have to host. Now, I only occasionally get them anymore.

This is a good point. I think this helped me understand why most times, I won’t accept invites if I’m feeling mentally or physically: depleted. If I do, it would have to be within a convenient manner. Like this week, client contacted for an outcall last minute, at night…but I had an outcall booking the next day in early afternoon. I wasn’t about to overwork myself trying to do both, because I know what each booking would entail: A fun buddy of mine wanted to meet up the same day AFTER I got my vaccinations: that wasn’t happening either. Which I’m glad I didn’t because it was going to be a sleepover. I was low energy last night, and felt like comatose until the afternoon. In both cases I was like, it’s not going to be as good as last time so; I’m not even going to accept the invite.

Well that’s the thing: I try to keep my expenses within a doable range, within expectation of what I can physically do. And yah SoCal is expensive not only to live, but travel around. A road trip around/out of California is different than a road trip in the “heartland”. I can generally get to the next major city for $50-$100 in 4-5 hours. It can take that long just to get out of Los Angeles/San Francisco. At the same time, the heartland isn’t necessarily the most open minded place to be. And business here tends to dry up or be filled with flaky inquiries who are a pain in the ass to schedule (repeated last minute requests to host, ghosts, and guys who have failed to complete a booking on multiple contacts 🤦🏾‍♂️ ). For example: near St. Louis recently there was a big commotion about a sex book in a public library that featured a pretty recognizable porn actor lol. It goes to show the level of conservatism and intolerance for sexuality, that tends to exist in these parts:

Damn, I just noticed it is this weekend 😯 I’ve never been but, I’ve seen the Google pics of various porn stars with their dick out and proud 😂 I’ll say too: not really related to the topic at hand but, the other caveat to those events is keeping your “group and/or “fling” together and also just general overload. Which I find can be work. I don’t mind going into a bar or club on my own, but big outdoor events: like as been said, you never know who’s on what drug: and the endless possibilities of quests can sometimes leave you not getting laid at all, or getting laid but not getting paid. And sometimes: hot bodies and advances from others, can blind out the necessity for money lol. So one could end up fucking 3 guys for free. But it could also make for some pretty intense edging, if needing to be on standby for a possible call to come 😆

Sounds easy, but not practical. Some clients simply can’t host and won’t get a hotel. I’m not mad at them. Instead, I am willing to host: I have just about every major hotel chain app and loyalty on my phone. I actually do enjoy browsing hotels, reading reviews and looking at pictures of the room lol. I much prefer even to book the hotel myself and have a choice…but that’s all part of “administrative” task that I should get extra for. Enjoy though I enjoy doing it, doesn’t necessarily mean I can keep it at the same price indefinitely. I can be the escort AND the travel agent, for a slightly extra 💵 😆 I appreciate your expertise! However, I can’t particularly say your way of working is going to be practical for me or everyone. Right off the bat for one: 6 clients is far too much than I would care to do in a day. I’d be physically and mentally exhausted. But that’s just me. 3 to 4 is my absolute max, and that only happens like once or twice a year. 1 to 2 is usually my preference. And if I have two in the same day, I’m likely taking the next day off. Now when it comes to traveling: I could write a novel on that. I agree with some things you mentioned, but strategy doesn’t always guarantee success when a curve ball is thrown in. I experienced that recently going to Washington DC couple weeks ago. I arrived somewhat short notice, and even though I had accommodations squared away for the first 3 days, after that I was on my own. And I wasn’t fully prepared that I wasn’t going to get the number calls I imagined. The only serious inquiries I got, were from returning guys I’ve met before (one on the forum, thankyou 😉 But I was dismayed that I didn’t secure any new clients on my first trip to Washington DC since 2019. One guy I thought I was going to meet: but he wouldn’t confirm or verify as requested, and I was supposed to go to some hotel in downtown D.C. He basically wouldn’t send a deposit nor wouldn’t let me call up to verify he was in the room. Not doing it. Then, I was blowing way more money than I bargained for (inflation is even more apparent in already expensive cities like DC: $20 cover, $15 drinks, $25 sandwiches, $4 gas that runs out in a day because there’s 50 million red lights all over the city every 10 feet, parking insane 🤦🏾‍♂️ : they charge like everybody is working for the government, not everybody can afford it lol), and then ended up with an unexpected medical emergency where I couldn’t meet anyone for a day. so that kinda washed out the: “A. Cities I've had success in before. Lots of repeats and contacts, etc. B. Cities I have researched and have reason to believe I will be successful. C. Cities I want to see for fun on my own dime, but make myself available for work.” Because all that was D.C., until it wasn’t. And it’s not the first time DC has tanked for me. It’s an off and on city. Which can often times make it hard to choose a home base. Do I want to move to a seemingly busy home base with lots of competition but variable dry spells, or a smaller city with little or no competition: but where advertising platforms might not be able to reach enough clients? Now on the flip side regarding not traveling, or advertising nearby cities and staying in one location: I have to disagree. Sorry lol. Not everyone is fortunate to be in a consistent area. I for one would be bankrupt if I stayed in my home market and never toured. Sometimes, you just can’t reach who you need to reach staying in the same market, advertising to death. In fact: I often times find when I go out of town for a couple weeks/months, I return to an extra set of new clients. Almost like, a new meat on the block type of interest. Even though I may have advertised there for months and got nothing. I also keep nearby travel cities up because, I notice in some cities: All the guys post up in the same big city and nobody is standing out. I have actually skipped those big areas and posted in nearby cities and picked up clients that I may not have reached where everybody else is advertised. I’ve also worked Seattle last year: that was also a city that threw a few curve balls, and it was around that time which made me revert back to my deposit protocol, even though I had loosened it some. Because too many of these guys are liars and bullshitters. I had booked an entire 2 bedroom home Airbnb for two days, for me and a relative. The first day was going to be for hanging out, the second for clients which I had the whole place to myself. However, I was flexible. Well, I had 2 no shows. And the 2nd day I reserved for clients: NOBODY SHOWED UP. It essentially detracted from the whole thing. I was $400 deep. Then, the next day to add insult to injury, a 3rd client who I allowed to book me without a deposit cancelled last minute, and then 2 additional clients also fell thru. All within 3 days. Fortunately I was able to bounce back over the next couple days, but the loss of earnings wasn’t something I was able to just brush off and “fill with other clients”. You’re coming from a point of view of low impact, but cancelled/no show bookings don’t affect everyone equally. Not all of us have the ability to book multiple clients a day, and also not everyone’s price or looks attracts the same number of clients. Not that it’s a low number, but a different number. I also prefer to work with clients who are moreso willing to screen. I used to just let any and everybody come thru the door, but then it would be those types who would later play games, give the run around, not be reliable. And ultimately be a headache and waste time. It’s like people say: “You make it so difficult by asking for a deposit 😭 “ Well, the last 500,000 years I didn’t ask for a deposit: people lied, and didn’t show up. And I can’t be bothered with the stress of unreliable clients when I’m going the extra mile. So, this is where I’m at now 🤷🏾‍♂️ I think ultimately though, once I switch back to a full time incall location, things may be a bit different. But I had that before. And people still failed to show at times. I wasn’t asking deposits. I was charging as low as $150-200, and people were still being dicks and assholes. I used to have Google voice, and every so often I reference a number and see it pop up from years ago: if they’re asshole now, they were probably an asshole back in 2012 too lol. I came across one message, the guy canceled on me just because I said it would be an extra $60 for half hour. Then had the audacity to tell me: “let it go” when I tried to explain why it would be that amount. Funnily enough: we met 6 YEARS LATER, and had a great time. But then we never got around to #2 because he started being an asshole again 🤦🏾‍♂️ So I mean your suggestions are reasonable: but it doesn’t necessarily take into account all the variables. I think if it works in your favor, great. But not everybody can adopt all the same strategies. And for me: unfortunately not much you said really gives me a reason to not start considering adding extra for incalls 🤷🏾‍♂️

When I mention those apps: that’s not a direct competition against me. That’s more of bigger factor with the sex work industry as a whole. RentMen is Grindrs competitor. Not me. And really it’s not even competition, it’s just one platform has capitalized off the disenfranchisement, of the failure to fully Decrim sex work. So while Grindr basically mirrors Uber and Lyfts layout of location based EARNING MONEY: they have essentially pimped out every user of the platform by: earning money themselves, yet enticing users to pay for a premium membership, while prostituting them out for free, essentially. Most people fail to see the stupidity of it all but: most are complacent with that concept, so it continues. And I’m complicit as well for using the app too, but: I’m not giving it up to 4-5 guys a day. I probably meet someone from it once every 1-2 months, and I try to establish more than just a hookup, since I don’t have the opportunity to do a lot of socializing in the common way (school/work/living in a building with lots of singles) But at the end of the day: I know what I have to offer. And I know when I host I’m putting in the effort and accommodations that will make it worth the extra I may ask. It’s not just simply a greed tactic. I know I lose money hosting, and I know my hosting effort is above and beyond. So, I may feel justified to add it to the price as needed.

Very good, realistic assessment. I seen this at an event I was working couple years ago. Though not directly in our group, lot of the attendees were strung out, and at one point: the resort manager came and damn near kicked half the pool off the property because they were being too showy with their liquid “paraphernalia”. I just so happened to be standing just on the outskirts of it, but I knew I wasn’t about to do what they were doing. Especially after I had to console a guy earlier who was shaking and hysterical after his friends said he got plowed on G and didn’t remember it (though I never found out the validity of that story). Lot of these circuit parties are pretty much a typical weekend in a gay bar district: same shit, just on steroids. I’ve seen the same shit, in different cities, 1,000 times. Though the only saving Grace is, the experiences are different, the possibilities endless. So it keeps it entertaining for me. As for the original question: by all means if an escort wants to attend such an event, attend. But let escorting/finding clients be a secondary function. That’s pretty much the concept of how I travel nowadays. I rarely places just for the prospect of doing bookings, unless it just happens to be along the way to my main destination (partly why it’s been so hard to get me to a particular city that a particular person wants me to go to. Not that I don’t want to go, but I just haven’t found a main purpose to go yet). That way, you’ll have reasonable expectations regardless. And usually, in the process I’ve picked up a client or 2 unintentionally. Like when I went to Iowa pride earlier in the summer, I didn’t have any clients that weekend. But I did have a friend of a friend who happened to be interested, and he booked me for his husband 🥵

Well, I’m not really trying to compare myself around the competition, in this particular situation. Using competition as a fear tactic (not that you’re doing that, but it’s easy to fall into the trap) is not something I’m interested in. Just in the past couple days: I’ve had to turn down 2 outcall clients, who failed to screen or send deposit. Even though I didn’t intentionally want to miss their business or pleasure: the times of night they were contacting me, along with unexplained/unexpected LONG delays in responding prior to their sudden urge in the middle of the night, were not something I was open to waive policies for. I wasn’t going to let the fear of them contacting competition, sugarcoat a situation that seemed sketchy and weird. But closer to topic at hand, overall I don’t think it should be a big deal breaker. For years, it was very common that outcalls were usually $50-$100 more in many ads. If someone can justify needing extra for an outcall, someone can justify needing extra for an incall. It just doesn’t need to be as cut and dry, or same expectation as that forever. And that’s also why I’m not making it a mandatory separate incall rate because: sometimes hosting may be more convenient for me than an outcall depending on the day or location.

Umm, actually no it’s not about hosting being too expensive or even avoiding traveling to a particular city. I’m referring regardless to the city or cost of the hotel. It’s more of the fact of getting a spot to host at all. Whether that’s $50 or $150, it still comes out of what I’m getting paid. I also don’t stay on any friend’s sofa…I’m 6’2. Most sofas aren’t big enough for me to sleep on. If anything, we’re going to sleep in the bed together☝ However, what I have decided to do: is since I’ve already adjusted by rates by $50-$100 this year: and my deposit to host is already more than it is for Outcalls, I mentioned that the deposit paid to host may not be included in certain “nearby” travel cities listed on my ad. For example, when I advertise in Kansas City, it costs me more time and funds to host. Also some people see my ad posted up in cities in other areas nearby. But then they expect me to drive there AND host. In their minds, I’m just already there or planning to be there by default. No. I am by special appointment only. If I were to do all that: travel, host and drive back: that’s not even leaving me with any profit unless they book my higher priced session. So, I just have to start adding the cost of the hotel in my rate, because it’s no guarantee I will have more than 1 client show up during the time I am available. However, I do have a city I can host from home…however like @BuffaloKyle mentioned: it’s not a place that’s available to have people in/out all the time. Fortunently, I’ve found just in the past week when I’ve pushed this concept: clients have been willing to either get the room for the booking, or decide to host themselves.

I’m definitely leaning towards that. But since I can imagine it might be a bit of resistance to adding extra for the hotel, I decided to just bump my price a little more towards what I want it to be. And I still find even incall/outcall difference in rate doesn’t make as much sense than having tier level service. Outcalls aren’t always “easier” than incalls or Vice versa. Some days I already have a hotel set up, and prefer to host IF a call comes thru. It’s just I can’t necessarily “rely” on the idea that by booking a hotel, I’ll make back on what I spent on it. Because a lot of times, I’m not. It’s been my rate, minus what I spent on the room. But if I can up my rate to a point where it offsets it, it might not be an issue. Fortunately, many hotel chains offer decent deals/rewards for regular bookings. So I occasionally end up with free or reduced nights.

Not to mention: I’m seeing many examples of guys who may not be escorts, but they are marrying or partnering up with older, somewhat less attractive White (and occasionally even other races who happen to be well off) men. So you’re definitely right on that. Lot of these guys out here be getting partnered for security…

As someone who travels and goes on “tour” often, I’ve usually always just kept my in/out the same. Some people may be familiar with having the outcall rate more than the incall rate (which I don’t find personally makes sense for me, since outcalls are technically easier for me…No clean up or hotel overheads). I’ve recently consulted with a different community, and it seems it’s pretty standard to add on an extra cost for hosting in hotels. However, it seems it hasn’t become too common here unless it’s specifically asked for. My reasoning for it: it used to be getting a room had the potential of being able to fit in 2 or more clients. Now, I’m finding in many cities, it’s more common to only have 1 client per hotel “booking” day (given you don’t get 24 hours, just the standard check in 3, checkout noon) which often causes me to be unable to see a noon to 3 p.m. client unless I reserve an extra day. I find if I’m “lucky” and can just happen to get schedules to line up, I’ll see more than 1 client. And of course the main thing, is the cost of hotels. After I pay for a room, I don’t end up with my actual price. Especially with special events like games, concerts, holidays: hotels jack their rates up, and if I need to host away from home: that’s coming right out of my earning. I also feel some clients book in-calls even if they can host, because they feel safer than having someone come to their place first. Of course I would be sure to bring it up, and lay it out ahead of time with the client. The decision would be between having a designated higher incall donation, or just manually have an amount added. Something like $50-$100 extra. Or if the person wishes to get the room themselves, by all means. By doing this, I would also want to cut out a lot of the “speculative” and “assumptive” things that go on. For example, some clients may see me posting in a city, and think I’m just going there by default with hotel ready and waiting. I have to remind them, it’s “by appointment only” anywhere I go. Even if I’m already planning to pass/go there. One guy didn’t want to pay deposit, but expected me to stop in his city AND get a hotel to host. Absolutely not. If I do that and the person fails to show up, I’m out the price of hotel, and my fee with no guarantee another client will fill the space for the 1 day I could book the room for. I ended up booking a different client in a nearby city who did confirm the session. I think it may also help with the “don’t get a hotel room just for me” phrases I get sometimes. Well then, would it be better when I have 2-3 clients lined up that day? Not going to happen. Most people lately often have too busy of a schedule, to meet all in the same day when I’m hosting.

It sounds good theoretically, but what you mention is simply speculative. Just because someone looks good, doesn’t guarantee a fortune in the pay for gay industry. I know this for a fact: I am on Adam4Adam and I may only get 1 client in a week or month out of a KILLING of replies. Many are interested until I bring up the money. Which is usually why within the first message or 2, I already have an auto reply set up that includes my rates. Which is the other point: just because someone thinks they can get paid, doesn’t guarantee they’ll get paid what they want. If you ask the average non-sex worker guy how much they’ll charge to do what we do: you’ll hear a crazy number like $500 just to suck their dick, and anything with sex would be like $1,000, $10,000, $100,000, $1,000,000 etc. But WE KNOW: the average “range” for an hour or 2 is generally in the $50 to $500 range. And yes, there’s people out there who think $50 is a good price to pay for sex. Not making fun of anyone but, I’ve heard offers of all sorts over the years 🤷🏾‍♂️ I think the real question is: why aren’t there more people willing to pay? Because at this point: I feel there’s already enough providers in most major cities. I know it doesn’t seem like it, and there “could” theoretically be more, but there doesn’t need to be more because; we haven’t even come into full decriminalization or de-stigmatization. If you have too many providers, the potential for profit will decline if there’s not enough buyers to do it. It’ll be like when I went to a strip club in Dallas once: there was like 25 dancers and 3 customers. There’s also been stories here and there, of people offering a guy paid sex, getting tattled on: and then being arrested (though I think it’s usually been the under 18 ones). There’s also been situations I’ve heard where someone reacted violently towards a guy, after offering a straight guy payment for sex. Obviously these are extreme examples but: it’s worth keeping in mind to be mindful, and DON’T solicit someone blindly, just as an escort (especially gay escort) shouldn’t solicit clients blindly either. I personally wouldn’t think into much. Even as a fantasy. Simply because: someone could say, “why aren’t more gay men into women? They would make BEAUTIFUL babies” lol. Well I would find that kinda offensive tbh. Even though it’s meant to be a compliment. I am what I am. And as others have mentioned, it’s not something everyone should or could do. Most people are of the concept: you only have sex with someone you’re attracted to. And then you have others (including other gays) who believe money should only be earned by working 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., and that sex is a God given right to give/get for free 👎🏾

In my experience: I’m finding the #1 thing that breeds a timewaster, is people not reading the ads. I know this for a fact because, I recently had to emphasize it in my profile. If someone reaches out and asks what my rate is, I know they haven’t read the ad. If they seem shocked or resistant to sending a deposit, then I know they haven’t read the ad. Then when it’s an issue, it’s almost a default: time waster. I’ve been able to make my interactions just a little bit easier, by just making sure they have read the ad, which also directs to my website. Once I get that part out the way, then we’re on the right track. But just clicking on an ad and texting blindly, without reading anything: almost defeats the purpose of writing anything at all.

Well whaddaya know: I decided to check my number, and have a couple or so reports myself 😂 Interestingly enough, I know exactly who 1 of them was: from a “couple” who sent pictures of “themselves” (And I doubt it was even real, looked like some roided up Instagram couple) who texted me from 6:57 a.m. on a Sunday, all the way til 5:30 p.m. that day. And hadn’t sent an address or confirmation at any point during that time, just a barrage of questions. And claims “he got mad because I asked if partys”. Lol No, the reason I got “very angry” 🙃 is because: #1: texted me at 7 in the morning #2: spent 9 hours exchanging texts #3: stopped texting entirely after giving me a time “they were thinking” (with no address included). I then responded with a time I could meet, and didn’t get a single reply for the rest of the night 🤔 So I can agree to an extent that, the platform can be abused. And I don’t even think the person was who they claimed to be. I had already confirmed before, there was someone who contacted me and sent me pictures of a gay couple, claiming he wanted an appointment. “They” ended up flaking out. Turns out, it was some completely different guy married to a woman, looking nothing like the photos of the “Gay couple” he sent (I have other ways than Mr. Number to verify). So, the reviews are one thing: but there’s also fake people posting fake reviews and just trying to put a dent in someone’s reputation. However, reviews on RM are likely more accurate than that site. My only gripe with Mr. Number is, although you can “write your own report” you can’t directly respond to a report. And their editing of a report is just screwy, and will simply add another report.

Mister or Mrs. number, or not: it’s still important to have screening methods. Even if that app wasn’t around, I’d still be having my own way of verifying. In my experience, majority of the ones reported: have indeed been a case of, “I should have read the reviews”. I think there just needs to be a let go of expecting full anonymity and no accountability. I have learned women escorts often ask for ID, employment info, references from other providers, and not to mention deposits. I feel the gay hiring scene is stuck in operating on “trust the client, fuck the escort”. And now people want to talk about how we shouldn’t even have a platform to improve safety or avoid red flags? Perhaps remove the personal standpoint and focus moreso on the bigger picture: far too many flakes out there. And simply not hiring a first choice is just scratching the surface. There’s some out there who have nothing much better to do in their spare time, than to troll RM ads . So, it’s only wise to have something to say: “hey this was my experience: proceed with discernment ”

Perfect way to describe: emotional vampires 🧛🏼‍♂️

oh gawd. Reminds me of a guy I mess around with who’s only 22 years old and was talking about his plans to get Botox because he’s aging 🙄 (and to anyone who thinks 36 is “old” majority of the guys who hit me up nowadays are younger than me. I think I’m getting more 20s guys, than I was actually getting in my 20s lol). I’m like dude, just use some vitamin E and cocoa butter. No need to start looking like a mannequin so soon in life lol. Ok, let me explain more to this: me wanting “more” is not necessarily entitlement. I actually sat down and thought about WHY I need to put my prices up. It’s not simply because “I feel like it” or that “I been doing this for too long, it’s time”. For me, as mentioned: my costs are gone up, and so has my effort in both myself and my presentation. For example; a hotel room with just a bed and TV isn’t enough for me anymore. I find it very uncomfortable, and makes it hard to enjoy being on the road and seeing clients. Most all hotels I host at nowadays, are suites with a separate bedroom and living space. Or at the very least, a couch. That tends to come at an extra cost. And many hotels aren’t upgrading top level members like they’re supposed to, I’m finding. The other thing is…the increased client flaking and guys who don’t read ads and claim having a website/deposit is “too complicated/difficult”: this also pushes me in a direction to have to raise my rates. Because I’m working with fewer people who are willing to screen and respect the need to establish boundaries. The days of just taking clients Willy nilly and winging it, are diminishing for me. Even when I try not to take deposits: as I did earlier today, half still don’t show up. I had someone book a session claiming to be coming to reserve a hotel and do a two hour session. Then I realized I didn’t bring up the deposit part. Time comes around, complete no show. Then there’s some people who want to give a hard time about deposits and don’t want to pay em. However, it’s anyone’s guess whether they actually show up when the time comes. And I have no real clout that they actually will, until they show up. And by that point, I’ve likely spent money on travel, accommodations, and already far from home. By that time, it’s too late. Some clients expect us to take on FAR TOO MUCH risk for $200-$300. I have to travel to a city, book a hotel, and pay for hotel: all with no deposit from anyone? No. Similar to how shoplifters/and those mass burglaries cause stores to have to pass it on to consumer prices, having a bunch of NC/NS can have the same effect. Feedback is one thing, but I’m not sure what you’re getting at. If it’s in relation to rate choice, I can clarify that: In the past year, the 3 clients who noted my rate went up: one was from adam4adam and he took some time to finally agree to booking to begin with (unfortunately, a site known for lower rates), another defrauded me out of the session, after paying with a credit card. And another was a client who had relocated, and said my prices went up: 3 YEARS after he last booked me 🤦🏾‍♂️ So not all client feedback is necessarily good feedback. Well, you’d be getting ripped off because: I doubt that 21 year old is going to give the same level of service as the 36 year old lol. Hell, I’m giving a better presentation in the biz now, than I was at 21 years old lol. Though I do feel there was more clients back then and it was MUCH easier: Craig’s, backpage, A4A used to allow rates, M4RN, rentboy, even RentMen was just a seedling 🌱 back in 2008 when I was 21 😂 and there was less providers than now, and no lousy hookup apps. 2023 in the escort industry a jungle 😵‍💫 Exactly. Maybe in some circumstances like, daddy/son role. But…there’s plenty, maybe even MORE tall, older, beefy bottoms out there that hate the idea of being forced into some “daddy/father” role, and rather want to be fucked. As I’ve gotten older, I am finding my quality of (ones who actually show up) client has improved. And, some are even younger. Recently had one who was only 27 or 29. I was 🤩 on cloud 9. Exactly! In fact, I will even say I’ve “dreamed” of the day I could be a 35-45 y/o escort when I was younger. They often seemed to be able to set firmer boundaries, get flown around, and get more longer sessions/overnights. Unfortunately, the damn hookup app culture and economy/Covid has dampened that dream a bit. I did get a taste of it when I first turned 30 back in 2017-2018. I’m hoping after the next election (politics often play a part too) things will level out. Too much “Demo/Repo” animosity going out right now. Maybe they should just elect an Eagle 🦅 Otherwise yes, I did continue to put my rates up. Unfortunately, I can’t only charge $200 anymore for everything and anything like things used to back in 2012. It’s nothing about being greedy or pompous, it’s just things are different. However, I will still stick with a tier level of service. I don’t imply anyone’s money is not valuable. $150 or $200 is fine for some meets. But the more involved sessions require a bit more. And also: I know this may not mean much in the big scheme of things considering people probably use credit cards, etc. for such purchases but: I have sat and listened to clients/gay men tell me all about spending $30,000 on upgrades for their home, or $12,000 for a leisure trip, and $70,000 on a vehicle: I find it despicable those same people will turn their nose up about $300 or a $50 increase. I find (the self absorbed) guys love to do that in general. They’ll talk all about how much they have and how much they spend on this and that, but treat their sex partner of low value. I’m just very against that. That’s why if someone tells me my rates are too high, I want to put them up. If someone says I should be charging more, I keep it the way it is, as that means it’s no reason to be gaslit since I could technically be asking more.

Well that’s the thing: I’m not trying to do less work for more because, I do enjoy it for the most part. But to me it’s just this idea that some seemed shocked about a price change. And I get it, everything has gone up and it can be annoying. I don’t think it has anything to do with any of the shit they claim it is except: “a politician wanted higher wages so now, we’re going to increase prices of everything in reaponse”. But I feel some are taking the anger out on us like: well now I’m going to pay YOU less because of it. Like dude, I’m 36 now. Were you making the same at 36 as you were at 21? For fucks sake, recognize the value of the service. My services hasn’t gone done in quality. At all. At all.

Well let’s not forget, sometimes clients flake on their own deposits. And in this case, I just did a very nominal deposit. Which I don’t normally do but I was trying to make it easy for the person. So, throw that no same day appointment idea for deposits out the 🪟 I especially do it for same day appointments, because I have to be ready at short notice quicker than anticipated.

That’s basically what it is for me. Just an extra $50-$100 Not a lot but makes a difference. I even had one client say my rate “doubled” last year. I had to correct him on that, since when did $50-$100 equate to double? Somehow, getting less and doing fewer bookings is supposed to make more. Hmm, how does that work? On top of that, I can’t increase my volume if I wanted to, in my home area where this guy is. There’s so many last minute requested AND cancelled sessions in the area I’m in, it’s almost become a product of the environment to strive for a higher booking per client. Like I say, most days when I’m not traveling: I’m only averaging booking 1 or 2 serious clients a week.

Well, here’s the thing: my price for the most recent particular person never went “up”. He was initially doing x amount anyway, but was expecting my “regulars” discount despite not having seen me in 8 months. Like, no. A regular discount has to be like, you’re seeing me every time I’m in town. This same person is usually unavailable every 2-3 times we try to arrange a visit. So therefore, a regular promo doesn’t apply. On top of that, there’s also options to do longer sessions. If someone can’t ever do any longer session and always wants to keep it at $200 or less…what does that say about the interaction? And then to make things more irritating, this same guy says “he’ll get back to me yesterday,” only to cancel this morning. Basically a passive aggressive way of telling me he doesn’t want to continue paying the price we been doing, but wants the cake and baby batter too 😆 Like at this point: he’s on the way to blocked and blacklisted. That’s just unacceptable a/h behavior.

I know this should be directed at the specific people who say that, however I can’t help but bring it up because I’ve already heard it (or shall I said, read it in text messages) now like 3 times over the past year. I’m sure I don’t have to explain why prices may be a little more than before. But some of these guys saying this, haven’t seen me in a year or more. The most recent: guy is a semi-regular but we’ve not met since December. 8 months, a whole new year and age older later, we’re having a discussion about prices up. For me: I haven’t gone up just because everything else has. In my case, it’s been a combination of increased prices and fewer bookings. Some of these guys are expecting full service sessions at $150-200 an hour. However, I need at least $250-$400 to be able to offset the cost I spend on hotels, commute, etc. So at times I have to request 90 minutes or two hour minimum. On top of that: I’ve known the industry since 2008. At that time, $220 was fairly easy to get. I was also (my own critique opinion) not as put together and attractive as I am now. But here we are 15 years later, and some seem to think rates should remain the same or go lower? I’m spending more on everything, yet don’t have the dependable salary I would imagine many clients have. And this started before Covid and inflation. For me, my expenses have been up ever since the “rental market” started to get hot in 2016 in many cities. I remember around that time, I did a hour session: having drove from one city to another (100 miles) and booked the room to host. I was only left with like $120 after the room. And that was my only booking that weekend if I remember. That’s when I realized: 1 rate isn’t going to be doable in all situations. And even a $50-100 difference isn’t necessarily a major move. But it still has an effect. I mean, my haircuts are costing me $10-15 more. My vitamins, protein shakes, and “men’s health” products are a little more right now than before too. Do clients expect us to just eat the cost of these things, with no sort of awareness that we might also need to adjust our prices? Do clients want a malnourished, soft dick guy with bad hair and nails to service them, because we can’t afford our essentials? Then it’s like: somehow we’re supposedly to magically be able to pop out loads…while servicing 2-3 clients (hypothetically) a day to offset the lower rate. Fortunately there are those out there that this doesn’t apply to, and most new clients I see are accepting of the newer prices I have. And this isn’t to poke at other clients or imply they are cheap, however I think there needs to be an understanding that sex work is expensive. I’m not some loaf of bread or gallon of milk that people buy everyday. I have so many companies taking money out of my pockets every month, I’m not out here just rolling in cash. If things were conducive to do so, I would be asking for $500 to 1,000 minimum for meets, until I was certain lowering it could reach a higher volume. Last thing I want to do when I’m in a region with fewer clients and more advertisers, is LOWER my sessions. Seems it would equate to less bookings for less made 🤷🏾‍♂️ I don’t think it’s right to make it seem like an escort is being greedy, when we’re not immune to the price hikes either. Also I remind clients: our rates, or at least mine; are not permanently inscribed in stone 🪨 we have the right to adjust our prices occasionally as we see fit. Especially if it’s been a lengthy amount of time (more than 6 months) since previously met or booked. Like I’ve related to hotels and airlines (I don’t fly, but gas changes just as often): their prices change almost everyday, and I’m subject to those same fluctuations directly out of my pocket. I change my price/rate structure every so often because I get bored repeating the same thing. What incentive is there to know you can’t change your price after a few self improvements or seasonal adjustment 🤔

I think we gotta bring that tattoo thread back around lol. But yeah overall, you’re right. I have seen “vintage” porn where there isn’t as many tattoos on the guys, as more recent titles. It’s definitely seen a lot more in the newer titles versus even the earlier 2000s. I feel a similar way to music and cars. I try to err on the side of ”not super common”. Not that super common/mainstream is a bad thing (in fact societies resistance to going outside of the box can make it that much harder). But, not doing so reflects a bit of originality. One thing that gets me with tattoos is, some can almost “go out of style”. I’ve heard references to “90s tattoos” and such. Like wait, if it’s permanent does it really matter tho? Lol. I suppose that’s what touch ups/re-designs are for. But going back to the topic: yes…I still say there’s just not enough information to make any assumptions. Even though it may very well occurred, it may not always be the “cause”. I remember years ago, some fucking bottom feeding, piece of shit and trash “client”, tried to make up a story about his roommate having his drawers ransacked and cash missing. He started questioning me…and I’m like: if I did take the amount of money he was talking about, I would have left already 🤦🏾‍♂️ I don’t even know if the story was true. But what I do know is I didn’t take anything, and I still don’t know til this day, why he would make some shit up like that, and try to frame me. Think it was his way of getting out of paying me the balance. But when he came at me threatening me, I didn’t hesitate to call 911 on him. The fact he was a client didn’t make it right. Because if I had to beat him up, I woulda gone ape 🦍 shit, and I know I would have been framed as the battery suspect 😆 I’ve learned to stay on the right side, and let the police work “with” you, not against. And later on, I found out the name of the guy and his place of work who owned the house he tried to pull that crap : and mailed him a nice big envelope, with a copy of the police report. People be thinking escorts have no common sense or we can’t do anything. I be like…I’ll be the last one ☝️you try some bogus shit with. Anyhow I have to step away from this thread. These type of topics can be very triggering lol. Fortunately, those past lessons have made it to where I more likely avoid such situations. I had to send a long text to a client the other month, about why he had no place to feel “weird” that I wanted him to come to my hotel first…versus to his air bnb with 2 other guys who “might” want to hire me. Like bruh, you may be a fine gentleman, but I’ve seen it all and done it all. I don’t always know why my intuition may not like certain situations, but if it seems messy, I’m going to avoid it. And sure enough, those 2 other guys never wanted to hire me. If anything they probably would have messed up the whole appointment.