JB_Studio38

My website is connected to my Ads. Once they see that, the website is just an extension of what I offer. I don’t want to be 100% explicit about my services, because it’s a website. One has to get in touch with me and let me walk them thru. My business card is the same way. I don’t list rates, my face or descriptive service. It’s that way by design. I’m not trying to be explicit, rather: informative. These are my rates and levels: but it’s not going to necessarily be in your face descriptions.

Did I ask a question though? No: I just stated a comment. As I’ve said before: you don’t have to like what I post. In case you’re wondering, or if there’s any doubt in your mind: I’m not posting to appease to your tastes or say what you want to hear. There’s plenty other threads here to read. Why you feel a need to keep coming around to what I say, and trying to gaslight me into believing I have no reason to expect, ask or suggest better from people: is very narrow minded on your part. See your way out, please. Block me if you need to. I’m done talking with you.

Have you actually read my website? The stuff you’re talking about tier level service is offered there…

First of all: I wouldn’t be hitting anyone up on Grindr asking to pay me. That’s not even my style. I was posting a profile of someone who hit me up, first. I can’t continue arguing and explaining how hookup apps affect the industry indirectly, but I do understand the potential effects it has on business. I feel it’s most noticeable in smaller markets. In bigger cities, there’s usually enough diversity of men to offset that, but it’s not so much the case in certain markets. And in those areas, sometimes hookup apps is the only way to connect with men looking for sex. So, in those cases, it’s not out of the question to just post up and BE AVAILABLE to the POSSIBILITY of meeting a POTENTIAL client from that Avenue. I’ve done it before, many times. And I don’t hit them up, I wait for them to hit me up. That’s all I’m saying. No deep philosophical dissertation or debate needed. Just stating simple fact and observations.

I understand there are guys out there who may charge $250-$300 for a rub and tug. I’m not one of them. In fact my website on my signature lists 3 different sessions clients are able to choose from. I am able to decipher the difference between a rip off service and getting ones money worth. Someone may say I’m expensive, but when I’m spending minimum $300 for gas, hotel, etc etc on a trip (and let’s face it, that’s just doing the minimum, I know many client’s hotels cost that much per night) if I only get 1 client at my base session of $175-$200: that’s barely EVEN breaking even. And if were to charge say: $100: that would assume I would get at least 3 clients to show up to equal $300. I can tell you right now, as I’ve said to the above poster: I’ve offered clients sessions like this and they still don’t show up. So, lowering the price just because someone else thinks I should, is not a solution. And you can’t necessarily say to me: if someone thinks it’s too expensive it is. In case there’s any doubt: I get plenty of clients booking at my prices. It just varies based on location, website and individual preferences. Hell, one of my clients told me about a guy he hired for $60. But he still pays me $300. So…what’s the compromise here? There is non. I’ve said it previously: answering questions isn’t an issue. It’s how someone chooses to ask them. It can be done without putting someone down or devaluing their service.

I understand that. I’ll be the first to admit: I engage in non hired sex from time to time. For me, I need that to balance the dichotomy between the 2. I’ve said that before. In fact, just did it yesterday. But, it wasn’t as candid as just coming over to somebody with nothing more than sex as the purpose. It’s somebody who’s also open to chat, watch TV, spend the night, cuddle, etc. I’m not putting everybody under an umbrella saying that if they don’t pay, they’re cheap. I’m talking specially about general hooking up. There are guys out there looking for free sex: but their parameters are alongside something you’d seek an escort for. Like in the example I posted: he goes from saying he likes hung men, to he’s not going to give dollars. That’s CHEAP. He’s not saying, “I like guys who enjoy watching tv and are interested in a boyfriend”. He went straight to describing a person’s endowment, and then adding in his profile that he’s not going to pay for it. That’s a cheapskate. PERIOD. Nothing you can say to change that. I didn’t ask him for money, he volunteered on his profile not to pay money. He could have said all that and left that out, and I would have said: “he knows what he wants”.

It is a thrift store. People are looking for free sex. I see it all the time. The ads are all about not wanting to pay. It’s a gay flea market. What’s offensive about that? Lol. Now, if people were actually looking to date and find romance…no sex expected, I could see how that would be offensive. But majority on there are not: they are looking for quick, cheap, easy flings. Without any money involved. Not because they are trying to save money like Dollar Tree or GoodWill, but because they are cheap. Mind you: I’m not trying to say every guy on the apps is that mindset. But majority are. I’m actually trying to understand your point. You just mentioned a situation about guys hooking up for free multiple times a week. What does that have to do with me? If that’s what you want to do…go ahead and do it. I’m not necessarily comparing Grindr guy to Grindr guy. I’m moreso saying in a bigger scheme of things: Grindr is doing a better job attracting freebie hookups, than RentMen is attracting paying customers. It’s just a fact. I know this because I work in the big markets and the small markets. I’ll sit at a hotel and have nothing all day long waiting for RM clients, but will get on Grindr and my messages are filled to the brim (granted with majority flakes and freebies). I’m just making a statement. I’m not in any way condoning or suggesting hookup apps are better source for escorting or clients. I’m just saying what the traffic is like.

I get that…but again I’m talking in general, not just one person. When I look at the bigger picture, I believe hookup apps still play a partial role in the level of biz. I get what you’re saying, but I’m just going based on facts and what I see. I could easily say: “I’ll never go on those apps”. But it’s better to be in the know, than to not know at all. And I know for a fact, a lot of potential, past and current clients have used or are using those apps. I would be lying if I said, “no client has ever mentioned Grindr to me before”. They have. They aren’t ignorant. I’m not saying it’s dooms day, but I am saying: it has an EFFECT to a DEGREE on the level of business. I should be very busy with lots of calls in Kansas City. Heck, I went out to the store yesterday and got 2 compliments on my beard, and it wasn’t from gay men. I know it’s not necessarily something “wrong” with me, but instead: a bigger force that I can’t always compete against. Not to mention, the already increasing “competition” on the rent websites. It’s only so many times I can sit and blame myself, and take other people’s advice: before realizing and understanding sometimes the issue is bigger than me. I can go on Grindr and get dozens of hookup offers, and they’ll wait to book me in advance: long as it’s free. I can find them in big cities and small towns. My “complaints” (as some people like to lower them to) on the forum are not about a lack of sex. It’s the system. I feel like there was a sweet spot in the number of booking I was getting during the heights of Covid, and now it’s fizzled out. I have heard other sex workers say the same, that they were busier during Covid than they are now.

The “gripe” that I have isn’t with the advice given: it’s the presentation. I’ve said this before. Ask yourself: are you really invested in helping, or do you just want to nitpick and see me shut up? That’s the thing. You aren’t coming to me in a helpful or constructive manner, you’re using demeaning, belittling, and condescending tone to get me to submit and scare me off from sharing the truth. That’s the problem, and that’s why we don’t see eye to eye. You also keep using general language and answers that is incorrect. Such as: “that’s why I don’t get any clients, or claiming I reject everyone’s advice”. You rarely come to me with respect and understanding, you come at me throwing flares: and that’s why I will never agree to your assessments. You come with a bitchy, sarcastic tone in every reply…and I can’t respect you for that. I know I’m spending way more time than any escort would arguing with you, but part of my duty to create a better hiring space, is talking to people like you: who can’t aren’t cognitive to the behavior and treatment of sex workers that doesn’t better the industry. Do you ever just agree with anything I post? You always have to come trying to prove me wrong or correct me. Everything you saying I do, you are doing exactly that. You literally make an argument out of everything I post.

This is a great strategy. I always feel a day or 2 isn’t too far in advance but, it also gives enough time to “catch them while they’re still horny”.

I was mainly posting that in the context of what you asked me in the prior post. In my case, I wasn’t “offended” by it. But I “might” tell them that, just to let them know: they’re not winning any points with me, by making disparaging/snide remarks towards aspects of the profession. Regardless if it’s indirectly towards me, or amateurs doing it the wrong way. Even if I’m not advertising on the platform or doing the same that those other guys might be doing: why bring it up? If someone can’t post about getting “paid”, then they shouldn’t be able to post about “not” paying someone. It’s right up there with the “no fats, Blacks, or fems” slogan. Okay so non of those suit your preference? Fine. But they don’t need to ostracize an entire segment of people based on something they don’t like. Saying it’s “sad” and not giving “You” dollars is nothing short of belittling and bullying. And if Grindr is so bad and full of opportunists, then maybe they don’t need to be there. Get off the phone, get out the house and meet guys in real life if it’s that much a bother. People on the forum love to tout “It’s part Of the business, you just gotta deal with it”. Well then, hunting for free sex on gay apps is also “Part of the business” that someone may ask for money or looking for a paid interaction. (matter of fact, probably moreso in the men looking for women realm as there’s plenty of women who won’t sleep with a guy who doesn’t pay a bill or take them to dinner, etc). And as for the RentMen client looking for a freebie: don’t even get me started. I could post so many text/Rentmen messages, this thread will run out of room and the forum will run out of bandwidth. “Some” Rentmen/Adam4Adam “potential” clients have been trying to get free interactions for ages. Hell, I just went thru and re-did access to my private gallery and there were like 1,500 members wanting access to my private gallery. Some who never reached out to book an appointment. I have plenty of pictures already. The problem is, we can’t even say in our ads: “do not contact me unless you’re able to pay”. We have to be bubbly and positive. Yet majority of hookup ads I read, the person is jaded or saying something to imply they are fed up. Where’s the “stop complaining” brigade when you need them? Lol.

The problem with that, many of those types don’t always follow thru. Especially if talking meeting in less than an hour to 30 minutes, and coming to that person’s place. Some get tripped up, over booking in advance. It’s not always a case of needing to “plan” being horny. It just comes down to basic common sense that someone who just realized your existence, is probably going to need to get into position to connect. Now if someone wants to just dive in haphazardly, don’t be surprised if expectations aren’t met. Not by me, just in general. Because some people tend to lump all escorts on a site just because they met 2 guys who screwed them over. One thing that amazes me: as much as I talk about “freebie hookup apps”, I find most all of my meets on there go accordingly. Sure you have the flakes, but most people who get to the number exchange point: usually don’t have a problem waiting a couple/few hours or planning the next day. But nobody is being put off: it’s just basic coordinating schedules. Anybody on hookup apps who’s expecting to meet asap without trying to figure anything out, is a red flag. I just don’t be so quick to meeting someone, without first figuring out what they are even into.

First of all, I don’t need YOU to tell me there’s an issue with my business model. And I just told you: me not getting enough business has mainly been limited to my HOME MARKET, that’s why I travel. You obviously don’t comprehend or listen too well, and that’s the reason why I bother you so much. And if I didn’t, you wouldn’t be talking so much shit every time I post something. If you think you can be a better escort than me, then why not put up your own ad, and see if you can make more money? If it bothers you that much. And if you criticize my needing a deposit, then leave me your number so you can be the first person I call when I need to host an appointment…and you can send me cash or money to pay for the incall location that I book when I host, or the travel expenses I spend to drive to different locations. If you can’t do all of the above, stop talking to me. Because you not even saying anything relevant. You keep saying business model, business model: but you don’t even HAVE a business model at all to offer. So STFU. If I take suggestions from people, it’s going to be within the realms of what’s possible. There’s a difference between suggestions and changing how someone does biz. It takes a non-judgmental person, to decipher the difference. You just want me to do whatever is thrown at me, without any understanding of individual circumstances. Don’t tell me to do something, and don’t give the blueprint or tools to make it happen.

Hmm…yeah, but I mean I have seen such crazy scenarios myself. But like I mentioned, I have to gauge how much crazy I want to actually get involved in. Sometimes my gut isn’t always right, but most times: what seems weird does turn out to be weird. Not to mention more than 1 red flag/dealbreaker , IS a red flag in of itself. In this case: no deposit, daughter at home, and looking for now…and two hours at that. It all makes me go 🤨 Oh…and “personal line” shows up in the “background” check. There’s no real confidence to go to something like that, other than “I’ll meet all sorts of people”. I don’t particularly worry about stings but: I’ve seen shows where it’s some crazy booking request: one show, the “undercover client” wants to dress up like a clown and have 2 women service him. Then, the police busts in and arrest the women. So it’s like yeah, anything that deviates from client behavior I’m used to…is going to be scrutinized. It coulda all been good and gravy or, without an apartment number I could turn up and get ghosted…at best. Non of which is pleasant considering to get downtown takes me an hour. I just rather be safe, than to be blaming myself later.

Everything what @Jamie21 said, but also any weird stuff. Like today: I had a guy tell me his daughter was in the place and to be very discreet if I come over. And before that he asked if I could come now, and wanted 2 hours. Everything just started sounding sketchy, and in my area: 90% of the booking requests here are sketchy anyway: so I sent him a deposit request just to rule out anything weird. Didn’t receive it so, likely bullet dodged. And people wonder why I ask for deposits. If they been in the game as long as I have: they’d ask for it too. I’m open to different scenarios but, it’s better when there’s no surprises or things omitted. Because then I have to start asking extra questions and making sure I’m not stepping into some shit. At the end of the day, long as it’s not a risky situation I’m good.

That’s a tough one…I have to really pick and choose what smiling pics I put up. I don’t think it says anything in particular about the person, just moreso the look they want to give. For some people, smiling can come off looking cheesy in pictures. I mean, even some celebrities smile/don’t smile often in most all their pictures. Or it’s just the overall serious sexy look, versus the playful sexy look. For example:

Agreed. I will say the only thing keeping me hanging onto emails is: the days I’m not on tour and don’t want to be on call 24/7, and being able to receive reviews since it’s required that an email exchange be had to receive one. Other than that, I don’t care for email stuff anymore. Matter of fact: an even bigger P.P. Is when someone emails and is asking to meet today at a certain time at a certain hotel (or my place), in their first reply. One better hope I’m not involved in something like: chores and hobbies at that moment. Because it’s guaranteed not to be seen until after the time has passed that they’re available 🫤 Timely for: text or email? Like was mentioned, timely varies…But standard business practice across the board for email is 24 hours. Text is a bit different, not a whole lot of etiquette has been done on it. But if I were to write the rules, 2 hours to return an initial text could be considered timely. Subsequent texts in an active conversation, not more than 30 minutes apart.

Yes, we are. But only to an extent. The issue is more complex and insidious than it seems on the surface. Hookup apps can and do affect business. Especially in rural areas. In my area, and even in medium market/Low-Middle Class cities: Hookup apps are king for gay meets. Meanwhile, RentMasseur and RentMen are pretty much dead in those same areas. Then they come to us, expecting me to play around like the app guys do: text 1 word sentences, trade pics, flake and etc etc. It doesn’t have to be a direct competition, but when it’s the most commonplace way to connect, it’s bound to have some affect. Granted, most guys who hire are aware of those apps and the time wasted/flakes/or even actual legit hot guys who simply aren’t available short notice, like many request us to do. So, they realize it’s better to book a professional, versus killing hours browsing thrift store apps.

I agree 100%. However, when it comes down to it: when someone says something about another, they need to be prepared to be corrected if it’s not an actual reflection. They can feel how they choose, but don’t come personal and talking smack because last thing I need: is someone misinformed with no hands in the business, to tell me in front of hundreds of viewers, that my business model is causing me to not have many bookings. And then doesn’t even say what portion of the business model it is, into this thread where it wasn’t even relevant to begin with. The answer is pretty much the same: lot of these non-clients men out here have become cheap and frugal. And the amount of professional and non professional guys seem present in every town. There seems to be an increase in freebie hunters. And freebies is the topic of this thread, so it’s not too off topic. Anyone don’t believe me, this is what I see in almost every other profile when someone hits me up on the “Goodwill” app. If I feel like it, I’ll write back: your profile is offensive, I’m not interested… In fact, I am moving towards deleting it just for the mere fact that I don’t even like seeing people with stuff like that in their profile. If someone has to actively hate on sex workers in their profile, that’s just off-putting

I do…in the nude photo industry it’s called fluffing. A bit of touching to help rise to the occasion

And that’s your prerogative if you chose not to. I’ve had several clients still see me off here. What is you and @pubic_assistance solution? If all you can do is disagree with my posts, and call my discussions complaints, then you’re not interested in making a difference. You simply don’t want to hear about improving hiring for others. Just say that. If you don’t like it, go somewhere else. There’s hundreds of threads here on the forum. You don’t have to come here and be condescending, and tell me something without any solution backing it. If you and @pubic_assistance think you’re the experts and can do it better, by all means go place a RentMen or similar Ad up and see if you can. Or at the very least, offer something more constructive to say and stay in your lane as a person hiring.

And I email companies a lot too…usually I get a couple replies in a day, if that. The difference is: I’m asking questions about a product or payment online. That’s NOT trying to arrange an in-person appointment. I don’t know of any business where you email the company, asking “Hey are you available today, staying at the Sheraton”. Or “U free today around 2 p.m. ?“ Like no. No. just…no. Email is not online ordering, it’s not quite set up that way on the RentMen sites. If it was, maybe then you’d have a point. No, escorts are running a CLIENT service. I am not a call center with 200 employees. There’s a reason why I left that industry… Don’t get me started on deposits. I already discussed that on another thread, but I’ll post an example again from other providers (Granted women, but men need to get on the ball with deposits as well…It’s 2023, not 2003 when online escorting was a new thing and people could be more reliable) And even my own example of a client who sent me a deposit and had a great time, but got ripped off by another guy who DIDN’T charge deposit (and I know the guy who he’s referring to: I worked with him one time, and he scammed another client, we could have been shot or thrown out the hotel, because he lied to the client and he stormed out the room) later… then after… Sorry that’s the case. Whoever cancels a Saturday evening plans with you…Would be one man’s loss and another’s gain 😜 I understand that could be a way to lessen the chances of plans falling thru, but ultimately it would depend on the provider. If they okay with last minute great, but those who need notice should be given that rightfully. There’s no harm in booking a last minute booking. I used to do them all the time and still can be open to from time to time. The issue is generally: if someone wants to make something happen, with another’s body in a sexual situation: they have to be willing to have the common sense necessary to understand: that person MIGHT not be expecting me, and things MIGHT be better if I try to get when they can be available, not solely when I’m horny. In one of those exchanges I posted, it didn’t even sound like the person wanted the booking in the first place: which I understand what @Simon Suraci and @Rudynate are saying: low probability people are hard to convince BUT: I’m still going to let them know regardless. I don’t think I should be labeled as trying to change someone based on that. I’m not trying to change anyone, I’m just communicating my desires. Period. I recall earlier this year, one guy kept texting me last minute, at night: I told him twice, darn I just closed taking appointments for the night. The 3rd time he got it right and it was a great time. Maybe I should continue playing that game for now on. I’ll always be booked, and booked, and booked again, whenever someone tries to meet on short notice. Then maybe they’ll say, “let me try to book ahead next time” I agree 100%, but again: it’s just me communicating to them what I require. They shouldn’t get offended. Most times, when I look for a guy to be intimate…who hasn’t hit me up first initiating it: They aren’t available. Clients, fuck buddies, etc. The main times I can find someone available “now” in regular situations: are the substance user types. Or occasionally the small town guy who doesn’t have lots of prospects to work with. So I know people know better. And I guarantee, I guaran-fucking-tee…The ones who do that ALWAYS…NEVER show up. They get called into work within 20 minutes of messaging me. It never fails. That’s why I stopped working that way.

That’s all true. That’s why I was saying in another thread, I would be less offended if a regular/repeat client asked for a discount and stated why (long as it’s not something like, my other guy only charges XXX or “this is tiny town, they don’t charge that much here”). Versus just flat out implying I’m too much. I occasionally ask my barber for his previous price, partly because the shop’s rate went up twice and it takes me an hour to get there. But if I need a haircut before my next appointment, he’s always open to, and I just pay it back in a tip on the next round. And you incessantly keep talking about the same shit that I’ve already corrected you on previously. Stop repeating the same misinterpretations you have, and maybe you can consider that it’s nothing to do with a business model. I never said anything about not getting enough clients or complaining about the ones I get. The ones I DO mention, aren’t even clients because they haven’t paid anything to be one, first of all. And not getting enough clients, I’ve already posted and shown messages about certain people’s mentality in certain areas. However, I wasn’t referring to the $700+fine dining client who seen me couple weeks ago, or the 4 clients I had before that, just in a couple days, one of who actually is an exec at a production company. So explain to me: how is that a bad business model, educate me? Better yet: educate yourself… I just showed you someone who went from saying he could be open to paying me for a massage, to now saying he doesn’t want to give me any money. It has nothing to do with a business model, it has more to do with increased frugality, guys wanting it for free, not “wanting to pay for sex”, etc. And it’s not an issue that’s unique to me. I’m on a different sex work forum where the providers are much more open and honest with others than around here. They have the same discussions… And then, the deposit discussion (if that’s the business model you’re criticizing me on). Again, these are other people saying this, not me… There you go. I’m done discussing, you just want to suck me…. ….into an argument and I’m not about to go that route with you 😝

At this point, considering what’s going on with the former “guy who has resorts in different cities”, I think there needs to be some sort of urgent revision to the whole Sesta Fosta thing. Like it should be announced: Even though, I did happen to drive by the ones near Miami Beach one year. Definitely stunning: Matter of fact, since this whole thing: I went ahead and just put my donations up to where I feel it needs to be. I feel some people expect me to do the same I was in 2010. When there was more clients and I could get away with lower prices. Now due to fewer websites, more guys popping up, and hookup apps: A lower rate may sound good to many, but unless I’m getting 1-3 LOCAL clients daily who are actually SERIOUS, Then maybe I could. Now If I was living there, maybe then someone could call me expensive. But I’m not there yet so, it makes no sense.

I get what you’re saying but, that’s not how I implied it. When I made the statement, I made sure to include that I did enjoy our company, but moreso the distance to meet would play a factor in meeting again. Granted: I have heard of people having boyfriends as far as South America or overseas. I know someone is probably spending $3,000 each time to see the other, which is fine if the person has the means and there’s something built up. I honestly don’t even know why I’m discussing this. I guess the topic about escorts doing freebies can cover a wide array of situations. I even feel cheap and petty talking about this, yuck lol. Why am I making a big deal out of gas money lol. But I know it’s not that. It’s not about the money, it’s not about the gas. It’s moreso I feel I reached the point that: How can so many wonderful clients out there be so generous towards us, yet these other guys get offended when bringing up something like gas money? In addition: somebody said something about dating/relationship…half these guys don’t even be close to that in mind. Lot of guys on these apps aren’t (especially when…RACE ALERT: it comes to guys who are into Black/ethnic men.) I’ve been down that road a MILLION times. They’ll play like my most erotic, attentive boyfriend for a day or 2: and then pull the “I’m not looking for a relationship” card. Meanwhile, I could have lost $1,000 thinking this guy was serious about me (true story, a client was going to hire me for a second night, but I left to go home to my “boyfriend” who eventually ended up telling me he just wants to be friends, shame) That’s why I feel lot of these app guys should be paying for sex, even if they say they don’t. If it was as legal as an Uber, I can imagine most would because, many aren’t looking for dating or friends. They just want a fuck toy. And being a fuck toy is okay, but similar to how they don’t like guys who drop the escort bomb, many of them don’t reveal they not looking for a relationship either until after they get what they want. And if there’s no opportunity for a relationship to happen, then I’m just doing to them, what I do to clients…but for nothing. Or at my expense, if I’m driving across town/multiple jurisdictions to reach them.