JB_Studio38

Perfect way to describe: emotional vampires 🧛🏼‍♂️

oh gawd. Reminds me of a guy I mess around with who’s only 22 years old and was talking about his plans to get Botox because he’s aging 🙄 (and to anyone who thinks 36 is “old” majority of the guys who hit me up nowadays are younger than me. I think I’m getting more 20s guys, than I was actually getting in my 20s lol). I’m like dude, just use some vitamin E and cocoa butter. No need to start looking like a mannequin so soon in life lol. Ok, let me explain more to this: me wanting “more” is not necessarily entitlement. I actually sat down and thought about WHY I need to put my prices up. It’s not simply because “I feel like it” or that “I been doing this for too long, it’s time”. For me, as mentioned: my costs are gone up, and so has my effort in both myself and my presentation. For example; a hotel room with just a bed and TV isn’t enough for me anymore. I find it very uncomfortable, and makes it hard to enjoy being on the road and seeing clients. Most all hotels I host at nowadays, are suites with a separate bedroom and living space. Or at the very least, a couch. That tends to come at an extra cost. And many hotels aren’t upgrading top level members like they’re supposed to, I’m finding. The other thing is…the increased client flaking and guys who don’t read ads and claim having a website/deposit is “too complicated/difficult”: this also pushes me in a direction to have to raise my rates. Because I’m working with fewer people who are willing to screen and respect the need to establish boundaries. The days of just taking clients Willy nilly and winging it, are diminishing for me. Even when I try not to take deposits: as I did earlier today, half still don’t show up. I had someone book a session claiming to be coming to reserve a hotel and do a two hour session. Then I realized I didn’t bring up the deposit part. Time comes around, complete no show. Then there’s some people who want to give a hard time about deposits and don’t want to pay em. However, it’s anyone’s guess whether they actually show up when the time comes. And I have no real clout that they actually will, until they show up. And by that point, I’ve likely spent money on travel, accommodations, and already far from home. By that time, it’s too late. Some clients expect us to take on FAR TOO MUCH risk for $200-$300. I have to travel to a city, book a hotel, and pay for hotel: all with no deposit from anyone? No. Similar to how shoplifters/and those mass burglaries cause stores to have to pass it on to consumer prices, having a bunch of NC/NS can have the same effect. Feedback is one thing, but I’m not sure what you’re getting at. If it’s in relation to rate choice, I can clarify that: In the past year, the 3 clients who noted my rate went up: one was from adam4adam and he took some time to finally agree to booking to begin with (unfortunately, a site known for lower rates), another defrauded me out of the session, after paying with a credit card. And another was a client who had relocated, and said my prices went up: 3 YEARS after he last booked me 🤦🏾‍♂️ So not all client feedback is necessarily good feedback. Well, you’d be getting ripped off because: I doubt that 21 year old is going to give the same level of service as the 36 year old lol. Hell, I’m giving a better presentation in the biz now, than I was at 21 years old lol. Though I do feel there was more clients back then and it was MUCH easier: Craig’s, backpage, A4A used to allow rates, M4RN, rentboy, even RentMen was just a seedling 🌱 back in 2008 when I was 21 😂 and there was less providers than now, and no lousy hookup apps. 2023 in the escort industry a jungle 😵‍💫 Exactly. Maybe in some circumstances like, daddy/son role. But…there’s plenty, maybe even MORE tall, older, beefy bottoms out there that hate the idea of being forced into some “daddy/father” role, and rather want to be fucked. As I’ve gotten older, I am finding my quality of (ones who actually show up) client has improved. And, some are even younger. Recently had one who was only 27 or 29. I was 🤩 on cloud 9. Exactly! In fact, I will even say I’ve “dreamed” of the day I could be a 35-45 y/o escort when I was younger. They often seemed to be able to set firmer boundaries, get flown around, and get more longer sessions/overnights. Unfortunately, the damn hookup app culture and economy/Covid has dampened that dream a bit. I did get a taste of it when I first turned 30 back in 2017-2018. I’m hoping after the next election (politics often play a part too) things will level out. Too much “Demo/Repo” animosity going out right now. Maybe they should just elect an Eagle 🦅 Otherwise yes, I did continue to put my rates up. Unfortunately, I can’t only charge $200 anymore for everything and anything like things used to back in 2012. It’s nothing about being greedy or pompous, it’s just things are different. However, I will still stick with a tier level of service. I don’t imply anyone’s money is not valuable. $150 or $200 is fine for some meets. But the more involved sessions require a bit more. And also: I know this may not mean much in the big scheme of things considering people probably use credit cards, etc. for such purchases but: I have sat and listened to clients/gay men tell me all about spending $30,000 on upgrades for their home, or $12,000 for a leisure trip, and $70,000 on a vehicle: I find it despicable those same people will turn their nose up about $300 or a $50 increase. I find (the self absorbed) guys love to do that in general. They’ll talk all about how much they have and how much they spend on this and that, but treat their sex partner of low value. I’m just very against that. That’s why if someone tells me my rates are too high, I want to put them up. If someone says I should be charging more, I keep it the way it is, as that means it’s no reason to be gaslit since I could technically be asking more.

Well that’s the thing: I’m not trying to do less work for more because, I do enjoy it for the most part. But to me it’s just this idea that some seemed shocked about a price change. And I get it, everything has gone up and it can be annoying. I don’t think it has anything to do with any of the shit they claim it is except: “a politician wanted higher wages so now, we’re going to increase prices of everything in reaponse”. But I feel some are taking the anger out on us like: well now I’m going to pay YOU less because of it. Like dude, I’m 36 now. Were you making the same at 36 as you were at 21? For fucks sake, recognize the value of the service. My services hasn’t gone done in quality. At all. At all.

Well let’s not forget, sometimes clients flake on their own deposits. And in this case, I just did a very nominal deposit. Which I don’t normally do but I was trying to make it easy for the person. So, throw that no same day appointment idea for deposits out the 🪟 I especially do it for same day appointments, because I have to be ready at short notice quicker than anticipated.

That’s basically what it is for me. Just an extra $50-$100 Not a lot but makes a difference. I even had one client say my rate “doubled” last year. I had to correct him on that, since when did $50-$100 equate to double? Somehow, getting less and doing fewer bookings is supposed to make more. Hmm, how does that work? On top of that, I can’t increase my volume if I wanted to, in my home area where this guy is. There’s so many last minute requested AND cancelled sessions in the area I’m in, it’s almost become a product of the environment to strive for a higher booking per client. Like I say, most days when I’m not traveling: I’m only averaging booking 1 or 2 serious clients a week.

Well, here’s the thing: my price for the most recent particular person never went “up”. He was initially doing x amount anyway, but was expecting my “regulars” discount despite not having seen me in 8 months. Like, no. A regular discount has to be like, you’re seeing me every time I’m in town. This same person is usually unavailable every 2-3 times we try to arrange a visit. So therefore, a regular promo doesn’t apply. On top of that, there’s also options to do longer sessions. If someone can’t ever do any longer session and always wants to keep it at $200 or less…what does that say about the interaction? And then to make things more irritating, this same guy says “he’ll get back to me yesterday,” only to cancel this morning. Basically a passive aggressive way of telling me he doesn’t want to continue paying the price we been doing, but wants the cake and baby batter too 😆 Like at this point: he’s on the way to blocked and blacklisted. That’s just unacceptable a/h behavior.

I know this should be directed at the specific people who say that, however I can’t help but bring it up because I’ve already heard it (or shall I said, read it in text messages) now like 3 times over the past year. I’m sure I don’t have to explain why prices may be a little more than before. But some of these guys saying this, haven’t seen me in a year or more. The most recent: guy is a semi-regular but we’ve not met since December. 8 months, a whole new year and age older later, we’re having a discussion about prices up. For me: I haven’t gone up just because everything else has. In my case, it’s been a combination of increased prices and fewer bookings. Some of these guys are expecting full service sessions at $150-200 an hour. However, I need at least $250-$400 to be able to offset the cost I spend on hotels, commute, etc. So at times I have to request 90 minutes or two hour minimum. On top of that: I’ve known the industry since 2008. At that time, $220 was fairly easy to get. I was also (my own critique opinion) not as put together and attractive as I am now. But here we are 15 years later, and some seem to think rates should remain the same or go lower? I’m spending more on everything, yet don’t have the dependable salary I would imagine many clients have. And this started before Covid and inflation. For me, my expenses have been up ever since the “rental market” started to get hot in 2016 in many cities. I remember around that time, I did a hour session: having drove from one city to another (100 miles) and booked the room to host. I was only left with like $120 after the room. And that was my only booking that weekend if I remember. That’s when I realized: 1 rate isn’t going to be doable in all situations. And even a $50-100 difference isn’t necessarily a major move. But it still has an effect. I mean, my haircuts are costing me $10-15 more. My vitamins, protein shakes, and “men’s health” products are a little more right now than before too. Do clients expect us to just eat the cost of these things, with no sort of awareness that we might also need to adjust our prices? Do clients want a malnourished, soft dick guy with bad hair and nails to service them, because we can’t afford our essentials? Then it’s like: somehow we’re supposedly to magically be able to pop out loads…while servicing 2-3 clients (hypothetically) a day to offset the lower rate. Fortunately there are those out there that this doesn’t apply to, and most new clients I see are accepting of the newer prices I have. And this isn’t to poke at other clients or imply they are cheap, however I think there needs to be an understanding that sex work is expensive. I’m not some loaf of bread or gallon of milk that people buy everyday. I have so many companies taking money out of my pockets every month, I’m not out here just rolling in cash. If things were conducive to do so, I would be asking for $500 to 1,000 minimum for meets, until I was certain lowering it could reach a higher volume. Last thing I want to do when I’m in a region with fewer clients and more advertisers, is LOWER my sessions. Seems it would equate to less bookings for less made 🤷🏾‍♂️ I don’t think it’s right to make it seem like an escort is being greedy, when we’re not immune to the price hikes either. Also I remind clients: our rates, or at least mine; are not permanently inscribed in stone 🪨 we have the right to adjust our prices occasionally as we see fit. Especially if it’s been a lengthy amount of time (more than 6 months) since previously met or booked. Like I’ve related to hotels and airlines (I don’t fly, but gas changes just as often): their prices change almost everyday, and I’m subject to those same fluctuations directly out of my pocket. I change my price/rate structure every so often because I get bored repeating the same thing. What incentive is there to know you can’t change your price after a few self improvements or seasonal adjustment 🤔

I think we gotta bring that tattoo thread back around lol. But yeah overall, you’re right. I have seen “vintage” porn where there isn’t as many tattoos on the guys, as more recent titles. It’s definitely seen a lot more in the newer titles versus even the earlier 2000s. I feel a similar way to music and cars. I try to err on the side of ”not super common”. Not that super common/mainstream is a bad thing (in fact societies resistance to going outside of the box can make it that much harder). But, not doing so reflects a bit of originality. One thing that gets me with tattoos is, some can almost “go out of style”. I’ve heard references to “90s tattoos” and such. Like wait, if it’s permanent does it really matter tho? Lol. I suppose that’s what touch ups/re-designs are for. But going back to the topic: yes…I still say there’s just not enough information to make any assumptions. Even though it may very well occurred, it may not always be the “cause”. I remember years ago, some fucking bottom feeding, piece of shit and trash “client”, tried to make up a story about his roommate having his drawers ransacked and cash missing. He started questioning me…and I’m like: if I did take the amount of money he was talking about, I would have left already 🤦🏾‍♂️ I don’t even know if the story was true. But what I do know is I didn’t take anything, and I still don’t know til this day, why he would make some shit up like that, and try to frame me. Think it was his way of getting out of paying me the balance. But when he came at me threatening me, I didn’t hesitate to call 911 on him. The fact he was a client didn’t make it right. Because if I had to beat him up, I woulda gone ape 🦍 shit, and I know I would have been framed as the battery suspect 😆 I’ve learned to stay on the right side, and let the police work “with” you, not against. And later on, I found out the name of the guy and his place of work who owned the house he tried to pull that crap : and mailed him a nice big envelope, with a copy of the police report. People be thinking escorts have no common sense or we can’t do anything. I be like…I’ll be the last one ☝️you try some bogus shit with. Anyhow I have to step away from this thread. These type of topics can be very triggering lol. Fortunately, those past lessons have made it to where I more likely avoid such situations. I had to send a long text to a client the other month, about why he had no place to feel “weird” that I wanted him to come to my hotel first…versus to his air bnb with 2 other guys who “might” want to hire me. Like bruh, you may be a fine gentleman, but I’ve seen it all and done it all. I don’t always know why my intuition may not like certain situations, but if it seems messy, I’m going to avoid it. And sure enough, those 2 other guys never wanted to hire me. If anything they probably would have messed up the whole appointment.

One thing I have to quickly note on my end: there’s always two sides to every story. Without any real evidence on our end or presence of the matter: I was merely speaking in general. That’s not invalidating or discrediting the story: however I have seen situations where someone appeared to be the suspect but in reality wasn’t. There’s still not enough info in this post to confirm this person was the actual suspect. And the ”first responders” would likely go about it the same. Hopefully: whatever happened is resolved timely and the OP can find a way to recoup the loss. In a situation like that, blame and regret are just secondary.

Thing is: the theft has nothing to do with how they met or what was going on. There’s not even anything mentioned in the post, that gives reference of anything beyond the theft. This isn’t a case of “he didn’t pay me for sex”. This is a case of; this person stole a vehicle and committed grand theft. This person stole a vehicle, took 2 laptops and a wallet. I would be 100% going to the proper channels and printing up a photo (doesn’t need to say “RentMen”, after all no need to give more info than necessary and giving it to the police) and make it very easy for them. Then I’d be taking the same police report, and sending it to the advertising platform to let them know what time it is. In fact, I would be me or having someone in my crew reach out to him personally and tell him: return the shit: or I’m coming with someone to pick it up FOR me. Period ☝🏾 Sorry that happened. But having been a victim of a robbery twice myself: and neither time related to escorting, I can definitely sympathize. However, in each case I can always see where I faulted and how it could have been avoided. In your case, I can’t quite tell based on the info you gave: but “going to another place” and 4 a.m. all sound like red flags. Not of you, but just of the situation. I never leave things within reach of unknown persons. I have a strategic way of putting things to where my sight is going to be on it at all times. I also avoid making any “detours” at any point. I had that happen in San Diego earlier this month. I was at one place, with 3 guys but then at some point the venue was going to switch to the other guy’s place. Instant red flag for me. I was like, “why are we switching?” It wasn’t nothing sinister (other guy was tired) but…past experiences have shown that deviating from the course of the original place, and dealing with unknowns can result in unintended circumstances. But regardless, don’t just let it slide. Even if you don’t get instant return of property, better than going unreported.

Great point about basic/gold ad. Even though I’ve kept a basic ad on one of the sites for the last couple months, I decided to switch back to Gold. Even though I was still getting booked even with basic, I was finding I wasn’t being displayed properly in some travel locations in RMass…and in some locations I had to keep bumping myself to platinum on RM just to get on the first page. So that was kinda disconcerting. I mainly do platinum boost to jump start a tour, but I’m not fully convinced it is reliable to use all the time. Except in the more busy markets where there is 2-3 pages of Gold ads. I just wish RentMen had the same level of “hits/inquiries” as the other site. Especially since it is more expense. Unless guys just say the other site to make it sound “safer” when they contact. I often have people contacting me saying they “seen me on RM.” I usually ask, which one?? Lol. This seems more true in some areas than others.

Yah I agree with that. Even though I’ll say: I think now that you mentioned it, I feel “safer” as a provider than even working in most of those professions. Stuck with some crazy at 35,000 feet…reminds me of that movie turbulence lol. At least we have the option to screen out or block those types before actually meeting them. That’s why the entitled ones who think they should be able to walk into our offices with minimal screening, should keep walking. It’s not meant to be a personal attack, only if they interpret it as such.

Right, that goes back to the thread someone posted about which is better between massage and S corting. And I was like, there is no which is better but…I do know what tends to be more “approachable” in some areas. Even Adam4Adam, they nixed the escort category and defaulted to masseur. Not great, but I guess better than no category. Somehow massage just happens to override escorting in many areas. I remember that being so as far back as the Craigslist days. I think what they really asking is, how much is it to…🍆 e.g. etcetera. But it’s like…it’s 2023. Can we just move on already? First thing needs to be done, is modify the S&F bill that T&P signed 📝 back in 2016. Considering all the mayhem that’s been exposed. Fortunently, I just had a booking request yesterday who seemed to have read and gotten the memo. I think going forward, I’m just going to stick with email and number listed off site. Most weeks I can handle the flurry of inquiries, but I just turned 36 less than a week ago and my patience for arguing with people who expect providers to do minimal screening: is low 🚮

Right, similar to Miami/Wilton Manors in Florida. I won’t mention his name (politics) but RDS is making Florida look extremely conservative when in reality, there’s tons of liberal fluid people. If anything, Florida is one of the most liberal states in the country as a whole. But you have people living and moving there who see all that, and throw the 📖 at them. Even Miami and Fort Lauderdale area can be super conservative in pockets 🫤 New Orleans is an example of an enclave in a middle of conservatism I experienced that myself. Considering Alberta borders Montana which is a very conservative and repressed state…it’s not exactly surprising. Hmm, idk about that. I stayed in that area and seemed to be convenient for most. However, I did week nights. I think the issue would come if someone tried to go during the most busiest and rowdy nights of the year. I never been to decadence or Mardi Gras, however I can imagine local clients not wanting to go down there during those days. Basically. On top of that: small towns are full of churches. My relatives live in rural area and I see it all the time. It’s all about church, work, and family values. So much so, that it rubs off on the gay community. No matter how much some tout equality and such.

Good assessment on competition and how it shouldn’t be feared but…it’s just in my experience especially in the biggest cities, with the biggest dicks and lots of chocolate 😆 : it just doesn’t pop as quickly as cities with less competition. Places I’ve spent time in like Miami, Houston, Chicago, Los Angeles…it seems like the money takes too long for me. I be desiring clients within the first day or 2 of arrival. I remember one year I was in L.A., and wasn’t getting anything. Went to Bakersfield and had a booking within a couple days of advertising. Though I will say: sometimes visiting and living in a city can bring 2 different levels of opportunity. If OP isn’t really reliant on bookings, and can post around for weeks and months and get noticed by a wide audience, it may be easier than someone just visiting for a couple days or a week and not easily noticed among the pages of ads.

At this point, I’m just over the constant stupidity. Many of these guys prove they haven’t done a damn thing to read my ad, all they’re doing is being lazy, clicking number after only viewing pictures: and not wanting to do a single bit of effort. Then, these guys have the fucking AUDACITY to complain about someone having a booking strategy, when they aren’t even the least bit honest themselves. For example: Yet I’m supposed to give him an easy meet up, despite 3 other people saying the same thing: All these guys do is just lie. That’s why I’ve just updated my Ad to inform people I’m removing my number, only posting on my website. That way I can prove who’s reading and who’s not. The rest can just bang their heads into a wall all day trying to figure out how to reach me. I’m done with the bullshit…

Though this may work for some, I would advise against someone new going this route. I had a client similar to how you describe as well, which was good in theory but: the issue comes if they want to “take stuff back”. Also in a case like that, that isn’t necessarily escorting or sex work. That’s just sugar daddy arrangement. Anybody can do that. Without a marriage, that basically could be anyone. Now over time, if someone happens to be able to come across someone like that and maybe they are on their way out of the biz: perhaps. Like you say, “short lived” was probably for a reason.

Well, though you’ll get differing perspectives and success stories: It’s worth noting that the biz right now is in a different place than what I might have been “several years” ago. Being fresh and new isn’t necessarily a ticket to instant success. Even with the optimism, still have to be realistic about the situation. And moreso: Los Angeles (and even the industry as a whole in many cities) is an extremely competitive market to navigate: there’s lots of guys just like you with the same ambition. Problem is: there’s too many escorts and not enough decent websites like there used to be. Not to mention, the economy is all over the place, with lots of time wasters: time-waster noun [ C ] US /ˈtaɪm ˌweɪ.stɚ/ UK /ˈtaɪm ˌweɪ.stər/ Add to word list someone who causes another person to waste time doing something that does not achieve any good result: The ad was answered by a lot of time-wasters who didn't even seriouslywant the job. However, it shouldn’t be a reason to not explore the industry if you desire. I would just caution to keep your perspectives reasonable. Figure a rate you’re comfortable with, ensure clients are willing to screen/give basic info, don’t accept last minute appointments (the ones who are like, wanting to meet “now” because they’re also willing to flake), and be prepared for it to take some time to make everything work.

I don’t think that can be answered based simply on which is “better”. Some masseurs would loathe escort work, some escorts would not want to do massage work. Granted, sites like RMass have given the opportunity to skew those lines a bit, but regardless it’s not the same. What I will say is, in some…MANY parts of the country: Mass is easier to gain bookings than escorting. Because we’re still stuck in the 1800s, some men feel differently about massages versus companionship. In my area, most all my requests are for that. Only difference: the expectations of price for massage can be lower than that of providing. I know some people offer, and some clients even go to: guys who charge $80 for a rub and tug. But it’s not sustainable for everyone unless they have the volume and/or extra income. And even if they did: that don’t mean it’s going to work for everybody. Just because one guy asks $80, doesn’t mean you slag off the next guy who asks $300. There used to be a defined line between Craigslist and Rentboy. Now, it’s just a thin line between rentmass and rentmen.

Exactly. Even if it’s “nothing serious”, one can still end up with something nasty from cum or “etc” getting in the wound. Even a little bit.

I been having people message, with seemingly no indication that they put any effort into reading my ad or anything before contacting. Just a bunch of vague messages. I’m trying to plan a trip ASAP so I can change the scenery from my current area. But it’s like, people are contacting not even giving the most basic details. It’s nice when a person sends a pic and a paragraph. But sometimes even that falls short because, they’re expecting something to happen on limited deadline. Like, all that info included only to learn they have to fly out the next day or something to where nothing can be coordinated in advance. What are people thinking? Am I expected to just be: Him: Hi Me: Sup Him: Available? Me: Yes Him: When Me: Now And then somehow, we just magically meet up? If they want 1 word, I’ll give them one ☝word

I was actually just there couple months ago for about 4-5 days. First time I actually worked the city, since I last visited in 2010 for a day. I was surprised, I had a great time. The first 2 days I had friends present, the other 3 days I was on my own. I stayed in the quarter and parked, even walked to/from different venues. I think the scariest part of the city were the roads (drivers and giant craters covered with nothing but a cone) and a palmetto bug that flew towards us on the balcony on bourbon St. Crime has gone up in many major cities. Kansas City has issues , St. Louis has issues, Denver has issues. I was showing some friends around in Kansas City couple weeks ago, sirens were going off everywhere, people fighting in the street. Many of the big cities are having issues. That’s part of why I almost want to just stop working big markets all together, and stick with smaller (not small, but smaller) It’s just the traffic can be much lower. I think if you just watch your surroundings, don’t get too inebriated, have a 2nd wallet when going “out” (I never go partying with my full wallet, I have spares that usually have nothing but an ID and just enough cash/credit for the night). I also don’t buy in-calls are any safer than outcalls. Hence why I ask for confirmation and screen in the first place because: most people with ill will, are more likely to come to you, versus you being able to track where they live (the Boston Craigslist killer is an example). Just have to get an idea about them ahead of time and anyone acting dodgy, keep it moving.

I think what it is: lot of providers want to be listed under the major city. Problem is, RentMen map feature is very precise, moreso than RentMasseur. The city of Los Angeles probably only covers a small square, before you end up listed under something different, like Huntington Park. Idk why, again one of the mysteries of the 2 sites. For example; in St. Louis: that is a very small area to pick from. If one moves the ad to just a few miles (like literally, one side of a city park even) to the next neighborhood, it’ll show up under a different city. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with specifying what neighborhood one is in. But seems to fare better listing under the main city.

Easier said than done. In my experience: most, except for the few extra kind clients: are not going to book a room for a provider. Why? I don’t know. But like I said elsewhere, if I was actively seeking action, I’d be willing to do BOTH. Host and travel. Both people should be willing to do both. That way if one option doesn’t work for the other, the odds (going back to that gambling thread) are in both favor. Doesn’t mean you have to necessarily be hosting/ready to travel 24/7 or in that moment, but better to be able so you’re not reliant or pressuring the other person to. That’s why I decided to ask for deposits. My hosting situation varies based on location, but for the most part it’s the same: I have to book accommodations majority of time. Which I don’t mind, booking a hotel gives me the opportunity to create my own ambience and have privacy, in addition to the possibility of hosting another booking or encounter. Assuming hotel rates are in the $60-$100 range, it shouldn’t pose an issue. My last hotel room was under 75 and it was clean, comfy, and bug free in a central suburban neighborhood. However in some cities, $150+ a night for even basic accommodations make it challenging, in which case I’ll either prefer Outcalls or will do longer sessions only. In most smaller or medium sized markets: in-calls may be most of what any can get. Many are likely married. Hard to make much if one doesn’t host, because majority also can’t host. Though I get your concerns, I think if you’re in a position to host from home, count your blessings and let it work in your favor. Gay men have to let go being dubious about having other (gay or etc.) men in their home. You’re better off in the comfort of your own, than to go to some mystery place that you have no idea about. There’s been times I’ve left the comfort of my host to visit a client, and wasn’t thrilled it because the environment or ambience was subpar. Usually doesn’t happen all the time, as many client’s place are much better than a hotel, but it’s something may come across when doing Outcalls. Back when I had a full time incall: I pretty much hosted all the time and only did Outcalls to hotels. However, people would sometimes flake or no show…which compelled me to let it go. And now, hosting is different.

My motto for anything that doesn’t have an exact cause: please go see a doctor. I had to encourage a friend in San Diego earlier this year to do the same. In fact, I was telling him: go to the nearest hospital and apply for financial assistance if you don’t have the means…this is no joke. I had a nagging cough for a few weeks (went to a doctor within 3 days, tested negative for strep and Covid), but ended up going to the emergency room one night because it got just that bad. Waiting for it to “wear off” wasn’t happening. I have asthma so, it’s not something I’d wanna delay. I can’t necessarily say the case for this person, but regardless: it could be MRSA and worth having immediate attention. If it were a cut/injury: I’d be taking time off or wrapping it with a bandage.