JB_Studio38

I’m glad you acknowledged that, but YES. I have implied this to be a factor many times. However, I feel the main issue is the money. It’s funny how guys I meet for “free” seem to usually have no qualms about arrival times or particular dates when they want to hookup. But the clients treat the appointment like a job interview: if I don’t get there when and where THEY say, all bets are off. But what they fail to acknowledge is, I don’t work FOR them. They aren’t my Boss. Just because they are paying does not equate to me being inferior and they being “superior”. It’s actually the opposite: if they come to my office, they have to be willing to do things on my timing, the way I wish to do it. They can’t just run up in UPS and start demanding to get a package 📦 delivered by a certain time, there’s procedures and extra prices to get it. But it doesn’t surprise me that many potential clients, especially in frugal minded and racist cities (yes, even gays looking for minority escorts, can be racist) have no concept of this. They make me feel we need to be desperate for their business by being a cheap, unreliable, nerve grating, high maintenance, impatience, inconsiderate piece of **it 🤦🏾‍♂️

And as much as I strive to let certain things not be of big deal: what annoys me the most is when I come back from tour; and these losers almost lurk and wait and come out the woodwork. Then I try get things done, or plan to pay this or that, and end up being unable to, because they think it’s funny to be a wind up. Well it’s not. I’m reading elsewhere online, of others dealing with almost the exact same:

This all sounds good: but the problem is when guys try to do a same day appointment. Then they want to try and get a time much sooner or later than what they have verified that the escort can offer. Just like today, the client was trying to bum rush me for a time, but he wasn’t even scheduled. He should have confirmed that request last night, not just trying to hurry me into meeting in the middle of the afternoon. He has not bothered to be of least concern as to what my plans were, it was just him being selfish and ignorant and trying to force me to meet him on his time. That’s why a lot of times things don’t go as easy as that. And then other times they don’t respond, start playing all kind of games and the appointment can never get organized.

Going back to the rest of your post, yes: both these guys have low baller tendencies in common. That’s part of why I’ve began to raise my rates because: i offer meets for a reasonable price and then they still find a reason to want to pay less or not at all. One client I would meet occasionally wanted to argue with me over $50 difference in price. Wanted to pay $200 instead of $250. I let him pay $200 back in December as a REGULAR client price, but yet he hasn’t seen me since December. And asking for regular price in September 🤦🏾‍♂️ Ended up doing the same thing the other idiot did, texting me to cancel in the morning. I went over to his place, picked up my cancellation fee, and won’t be wasting my time on him again. Another unreliable Adam client. And yes, lot of the lower Midwest inquiries come with a trashy low budget personality and never keep their word. Then they want to be impatient after they waited months and years to return a message. So aggravating. That’s why I kinda had to give my input when you mentioned not traveling so often. I HAVE TO. I have no choice. If I sat around and dealt with these imbeciles everyday, I’d be bankrupt.

I hear you out, but this is the kind of stuff I refer to. This is a guy who’s hired me 3 times previously. But over the whole course of knowing him, he’s been the exact same person I’ve outlined in my headline. Every, single, word: So I sent him a request for me cancellation fee which “starts” at $50: I been trying to be nice with him, to an extent…and not burn his bridge, but this time: I’m done. I refuse to be played with over and over. And he had the chance to just book me last night. Why the fuck he didn’t, and changed his mind then? 🤷🏾‍♂️ And then he goes from wanting today, to tomorrow, oh no: “another day”. Next week, the week after. Bitch, I don’t have time for that shit. It’s no reason to be unable to make up your mind when we’ve already met and he knows how I operate

He doesn’t have any reports. But he’s going to have one now. I’m finding a lot of providers in the Midwest, don’t know about these warning apps. So I have to start spreading the word. I don’t care if a client knows or doesn’t like it. They need to start knowing: if you do a provider shitty, and you a HABIT and HISTORY of not just unreliability: but INTENTIONALLY stringing providers along and being a headache: you will be reported. I’m tired of the bullshit.

Look at this conversation. Nothing in this conversation where he says “rest of the day” implies I needed to immediately drop everything and come right that moment. If you wanted to meet by a particular time he could have made that clear. so then why it turns into: and then I even pick up the phone and called: and informed him I’m already nearby, and reiterate that I had TOLD HIM earlier, that I was leaving in 15 minutes and it would be an additional 50 minutes at least to arrive. He claims I didn’t tell him when I was leaving, and hung up on me 🤦🏾‍♂️ At that point, I was already minutes away. I even went as far as pulling up by his house, so he can’t see my license plate: and blowing the horn for a minute, just to embarrass him. But I know he would likely try to pull a bitch move and call the cops. Karma will catch up to him in a year or less, so even though I could have threw a brick thru his window: I’m not going to get myself in trouble over trash 🚮

They don’t keep their appointments, they cancel like 3 times in one conversation, super high maintenance, seems to more often come from the bottoms but can be of any position. These MoFos don’t even be paying me enough to deal with their bullshit. Just today, I’ve already had 2 idiot clients cancel on me. One is a regular who has a habit of doing it, and I’m not giving him anymore chances. Another cancelled on my records back in 2021, and does it again today while I’m in route. He was already disrespectful earlier, rushing me to meet, out the blue. But yet: he wasn’t in a hurry to follow back up since 2021. Now it’s urgent? This is why I don’t meet people without a deposit anymore. I’m going to post his name address and screenname to the blacklist for not only wasting my time, but sending me his address and cancelling, being rude, then hanging up as I was already en route: This is especially bad in the Midwest. anybody thinking of coming to Kansas City, St. Louis, Ohio…basically anywhere that i70 runs: including Denver. Just don’t. All these guys do is wind you up and waste your time. They rush you to meet, but then when it comes down to it, they can’t even keep their word. And that damn Adam4Adam, I’m done with it, bunch of liars and flakes. I don’t see how @Simon Suraci can manage 6 clients a day, any day. It’s hard to even get 2 in a row to not be a liar or bullshitter. In St. Louis last week, I had to not go to 2 different appointments because they were weird, wouldn’t answer questions, waited HOURS between messages and then want to call me at 10, 11, 1:45 in the fucking morning: to come see them. After not responding for hours. And now it’s urgent. Right. It’s so many low ballers, impatient, uncooperative, just pain in the ass people who contact. I’m about to just go to doing a mandatory no text no call without consultation fee. I’m just fed up with the crap.

True but, I was talking about it as a bigger picture aspect. I know it serves a purpose where gay life is nonexistent or highly risky. I see that myself when I have to spend time in a small town regularly. However: Grindr and company aren’t necessarily the godsend that it APPEARS to be because, they aren’t covering all bases of gay life. And a big part of gay life is being able to sell what you have. I mean, it’s no secret. Big cities like San Francisco and New York are both cities with tons of free and paid sex. I can at least say Adam4Adam did the right thing by allowing providers to promote. However, I think there’s an issue with using an app versus a website that doesn’t allow services. And I still stand by the fact that they hijacked a lot of work from gay sex workers, but have done nothing to reimburse us. They pay us back in the form of banning and restrictions. That’s why I won’t pay them a penny to get “Extra”. So many guys would hit me up on the goodwill app, talking about they’re on business at a hotel and want to get fucked. That used to be a good portion of my bookings: hotel outcalls. I didn’t even have to host. Now, I only occasionally get them anymore.

This is a good point. I think this helped me understand why most times, I won’t accept invites if I’m feeling mentally or physically: depleted. If I do, it would have to be within a convenient manner. Like this week, client contacted for an outcall last minute, at night…but I had an outcall booking the next day in early afternoon. I wasn’t about to overwork myself trying to do both, because I know what each booking would entail: A fun buddy of mine wanted to meet up the same day AFTER I got my vaccinations: that wasn’t happening either. Which I’m glad I didn’t because it was going to be a sleepover. I was low energy last night, and felt like comatose until the afternoon. In both cases I was like, it’s not going to be as good as last time so; I’m not even going to accept the invite.

Well that’s the thing: I try to keep my expenses within a doable range, within expectation of what I can physically do. And yah SoCal is expensive not only to live, but travel around. A road trip around/out of California is different than a road trip in the “heartland”. I can generally get to the next major city for $50-$100 in 4-5 hours. It can take that long just to get out of Los Angeles/San Francisco. At the same time, the heartland isn’t necessarily the most open minded place to be. And business here tends to dry up or be filled with flaky inquiries who are a pain in the ass to schedule (repeated last minute requests to host, ghosts, and guys who have failed to complete a booking on multiple contacts 🤦🏾‍♂️ ). For example: near St. Louis recently there was a big commotion about a sex book in a public library that featured a pretty recognizable porn actor lol. It goes to show the level of conservatism and intolerance for sexuality, that tends to exist in these parts:

Damn, I just noticed it is this weekend 😯 I’ve never been but, I’ve seen the Google pics of various porn stars with their dick out and proud 😂 I’ll say too: not really related to the topic at hand but, the other caveat to those events is keeping your “group and/or “fling” together and also just general overload. Which I find can be work. I don’t mind going into a bar or club on my own, but big outdoor events: like as been said, you never know who’s on what drug: and the endless possibilities of quests can sometimes leave you not getting laid at all, or getting laid but not getting paid. And sometimes: hot bodies and advances from others, can blind out the necessity for money lol. So one could end up fucking 3 guys for free. But it could also make for some pretty intense edging, if needing to be on standby for a possible call to come 😆

Sounds easy, but not practical. Some clients simply can’t host and won’t get a hotel. I’m not mad at them. Instead, I am willing to host: I have just about every major hotel chain app and loyalty on my phone. I actually do enjoy browsing hotels, reading reviews and looking at pictures of the room lol. I much prefer even to book the hotel myself and have a choice…but that’s all part of “administrative” task that I should get extra for. Enjoy though I enjoy doing it, doesn’t necessarily mean I can keep it at the same price indefinitely. I can be the escort AND the travel agent, for a slightly extra 💵 😆 I appreciate your expertise! However, I can’t particularly say your way of working is going to be practical for me or everyone. Right off the bat for one: 6 clients is far too much than I would care to do in a day. I’d be physically and mentally exhausted. But that’s just me. 3 to 4 is my absolute max, and that only happens like once or twice a year. 1 to 2 is usually my preference. And if I have two in the same day, I’m likely taking the next day off. Now when it comes to traveling: I could write a novel on that. I agree with some things you mentioned, but strategy doesn’t always guarantee success when a curve ball is thrown in. I experienced that recently going to Washington DC couple weeks ago. I arrived somewhat short notice, and even though I had accommodations squared away for the first 3 days, after that I was on my own. And I wasn’t fully prepared that I wasn’t going to get the number calls I imagined. The only serious inquiries I got, were from returning guys I’ve met before (one on the forum, thankyou 😉 But I was dismayed that I didn’t secure any new clients on my first trip to Washington DC since 2019. One guy I thought I was going to meet: but he wouldn’t confirm or verify as requested, and I was supposed to go to some hotel in downtown D.C. He basically wouldn’t send a deposit nor wouldn’t let me call up to verify he was in the room. Not doing it. Then, I was blowing way more money than I bargained for (inflation is even more apparent in already expensive cities like DC: $20 cover, $15 drinks, $25 sandwiches, $4 gas that runs out in a day because there’s 50 million red lights all over the city every 10 feet, parking insane 🤦🏾‍♂️ : they charge like everybody is working for the government, not everybody can afford it lol), and then ended up with an unexpected medical emergency where I couldn’t meet anyone for a day. so that kinda washed out the: “A. Cities I've had success in before. Lots of repeats and contacts, etc. B. Cities I have researched and have reason to believe I will be successful. C. Cities I want to see for fun on my own dime, but make myself available for work.” Because all that was D.C., until it wasn’t. And it’s not the first time DC has tanked for me. It’s an off and on city. Which can often times make it hard to choose a home base. Do I want to move to a seemingly busy home base with lots of competition but variable dry spells, or a smaller city with little or no competition: but where advertising platforms might not be able to reach enough clients? Now on the flip side regarding not traveling, or advertising nearby cities and staying in one location: I have to disagree. Sorry lol. Not everyone is fortunate to be in a consistent area. I for one would be bankrupt if I stayed in my home market and never toured. Sometimes, you just can’t reach who you need to reach staying in the same market, advertising to death. In fact: I often times find when I go out of town for a couple weeks/months, I return to an extra set of new clients. Almost like, a new meat on the block type of interest. Even though I may have advertised there for months and got nothing. I also keep nearby travel cities up because, I notice in some cities: All the guys post up in the same big city and nobody is standing out. I have actually skipped those big areas and posted in nearby cities and picked up clients that I may not have reached where everybody else is advertised. I’ve also worked Seattle last year: that was also a city that threw a few curve balls, and it was around that time which made me revert back to my deposit protocol, even though I had loosened it some. Because too many of these guys are liars and bullshitters. I had booked an entire 2 bedroom home Airbnb for two days, for me and a relative. The first day was going to be for hanging out, the second for clients which I had the whole place to myself. However, I was flexible. Well, I had 2 no shows. And the 2nd day I reserved for clients: NOBODY SHOWED UP. It essentially detracted from the whole thing. I was $400 deep. Then, the next day to add insult to injury, a 3rd client who I allowed to book me without a deposit cancelled last minute, and then 2 additional clients also fell thru. All within 3 days. Fortunately I was able to bounce back over the next couple days, but the loss of earnings wasn’t something I was able to just brush off and “fill with other clients”. You’re coming from a point of view of low impact, but cancelled/no show bookings don’t affect everyone equally. Not all of us have the ability to book multiple clients a day, and also not everyone’s price or looks attracts the same number of clients. Not that it’s a low number, but a different number. I also prefer to work with clients who are moreso willing to screen. I used to just let any and everybody come thru the door, but then it would be those types who would later play games, give the run around, not be reliable. And ultimately be a headache and waste time. It’s like people say: “You make it so difficult by asking for a deposit 😭 “ Well, the last 500,000 years I didn’t ask for a deposit: people lied, and didn’t show up. And I can’t be bothered with the stress of unreliable clients when I’m going the extra mile. So, this is where I’m at now 🤷🏾‍♂️ I think ultimately though, once I switch back to a full time incall location, things may be a bit different. But I had that before. And people still failed to show at times. I wasn’t asking deposits. I was charging as low as $150-200, and people were still being dicks and assholes. I used to have Google voice, and every so often I reference a number and see it pop up from years ago: if they’re asshole now, they were probably an asshole back in 2012 too lol. I came across one message, the guy canceled on me just because I said it would be an extra $60 for half hour. Then had the audacity to tell me: “let it go” when I tried to explain why it would be that amount. Funnily enough: we met 6 YEARS LATER, and had a great time. But then we never got around to #2 because he started being an asshole again 🤦🏾‍♂️ So I mean your suggestions are reasonable: but it doesn’t necessarily take into account all the variables. I think if it works in your favor, great. But not everybody can adopt all the same strategies. And for me: unfortunately not much you said really gives me a reason to not start considering adding extra for incalls 🤷🏾‍♂️

When I mention those apps: that’s not a direct competition against me. That’s more of bigger factor with the sex work industry as a whole. RentMen is Grindrs competitor. Not me. And really it’s not even competition, it’s just one platform has capitalized off the disenfranchisement, of the failure to fully Decrim sex work. So while Grindr basically mirrors Uber and Lyfts layout of location based EARNING MONEY: they have essentially pimped out every user of the platform by: earning money themselves, yet enticing users to pay for a premium membership, while prostituting them out for free, essentially. Most people fail to see the stupidity of it all but: most are complacent with that concept, so it continues. And I’m complicit as well for using the app too, but: I’m not giving it up to 4-5 guys a day. I probably meet someone from it once every 1-2 months, and I try to establish more than just a hookup, since I don’t have the opportunity to do a lot of socializing in the common way (school/work/living in a building with lots of singles) But at the end of the day: I know what I have to offer. And I know when I host I’m putting in the effort and accommodations that will make it worth the extra I may ask. It’s not just simply a greed tactic. I know I lose money hosting, and I know my hosting effort is above and beyond. So, I may feel justified to add it to the price as needed.

Very good, realistic assessment. I seen this at an event I was working couple years ago. Though not directly in our group, lot of the attendees were strung out, and at one point: the resort manager came and damn near kicked half the pool off the property because they were being too showy with their liquid “paraphernalia”. I just so happened to be standing just on the outskirts of it, but I knew I wasn’t about to do what they were doing. Especially after I had to console a guy earlier who was shaking and hysterical after his friends said he got plowed on G and didn’t remember it (though I never found out the validity of that story). Lot of these circuit parties are pretty much a typical weekend in a gay bar district: same shit, just on steroids. I’ve seen the same shit, in different cities, 1,000 times. Though the only saving Grace is, the experiences are different, the possibilities endless. So it keeps it entertaining for me. As for the original question: by all means if an escort wants to attend such an event, attend. But let escorting/finding clients be a secondary function. That’s pretty much the concept of how I travel nowadays. I rarely places just for the prospect of doing bookings, unless it just happens to be along the way to my main destination (partly why it’s been so hard to get me to a particular city that a particular person wants me to go to. Not that I don’t want to go, but I just haven’t found a main purpose to go yet). That way, you’ll have reasonable expectations regardless. And usually, in the process I’ve picked up a client or 2 unintentionally. Like when I went to Iowa pride earlier in the summer, I didn’t have any clients that weekend. But I did have a friend of a friend who happened to be interested, and he booked me for his husband 🥵

Well, I’m not really trying to compare myself around the competition, in this particular situation. Using competition as a fear tactic (not that you’re doing that, but it’s easy to fall into the trap) is not something I’m interested in. Just in the past couple days: I’ve had to turn down 2 outcall clients, who failed to screen or send deposit. Even though I didn’t intentionally want to miss their business or pleasure: the times of night they were contacting me, along with unexplained/unexpected LONG delays in responding prior to their sudden urge in the middle of the night, were not something I was open to waive policies for. I wasn’t going to let the fear of them contacting competition, sugarcoat a situation that seemed sketchy and weird. But closer to topic at hand, overall I don’t think it should be a big deal breaker. For years, it was very common that outcalls were usually $50-$100 more in many ads. If someone can justify needing extra for an outcall, someone can justify needing extra for an incall. It just doesn’t need to be as cut and dry, or same expectation as that forever. And that’s also why I’m not making it a mandatory separate incall rate because: sometimes hosting may be more convenient for me than an outcall depending on the day or location.

Umm, actually no it’s not about hosting being too expensive or even avoiding traveling to a particular city. I’m referring regardless to the city or cost of the hotel. It’s more of the fact of getting a spot to host at all. Whether that’s $50 or $150, it still comes out of what I’m getting paid. I also don’t stay on any friend’s sofa…I’m 6’2. Most sofas aren’t big enough for me to sleep on. If anything, we’re going to sleep in the bed together☝ However, what I have decided to do: is since I’ve already adjusted by rates by $50-$100 this year: and my deposit to host is already more than it is for Outcalls, I mentioned that the deposit paid to host may not be included in certain “nearby” travel cities listed on my ad. For example, when I advertise in Kansas City, it costs me more time and funds to host. Also some people see my ad posted up in cities in other areas nearby. But then they expect me to drive there AND host. In their minds, I’m just already there or planning to be there by default. No. I am by special appointment only. If I were to do all that: travel, host and drive back: that’s not even leaving me with any profit unless they book my higher priced session. So, I just have to start adding the cost of the hotel in my rate, because it’s no guarantee I will have more than 1 client show up during the time I am available. However, I do have a city I can host from home…however like @BuffaloKyle mentioned: it’s not a place that’s available to have people in/out all the time. Fortunently, I’ve found just in the past week when I’ve pushed this concept: clients have been willing to either get the room for the booking, or decide to host themselves.

I’m definitely leaning towards that. But since I can imagine it might be a bit of resistance to adding extra for the hotel, I decided to just bump my price a little more towards what I want it to be. And I still find even incall/outcall difference in rate doesn’t make as much sense than having tier level service. Outcalls aren’t always “easier” than incalls or Vice versa. Some days I already have a hotel set up, and prefer to host IF a call comes thru. It’s just I can’t necessarily “rely” on the idea that by booking a hotel, I’ll make back on what I spent on it. Because a lot of times, I’m not. It’s been my rate, minus what I spent on the room. But if I can up my rate to a point where it offsets it, it might not be an issue. Fortunately, many hotel chains offer decent deals/rewards for regular bookings. So I occasionally end up with free or reduced nights.

Not to mention: I’m seeing many examples of guys who may not be escorts, but they are marrying or partnering up with older, somewhat less attractive White (and occasionally even other races who happen to be well off) men. So you’re definitely right on that. Lot of these guys out here be getting partnered for security…

As someone who travels and goes on “tour” often, I’ve usually always just kept my in/out the same. Some people may be familiar with having the outcall rate more than the incall rate (which I don’t find personally makes sense for me, since outcalls are technically easier for me…No clean up or hotel overheads). I’ve recently consulted with a different community, and it seems it’s pretty standard to add on an extra cost for hosting in hotels. However, it seems it hasn’t become too common here unless it’s specifically asked for. My reasoning for it: it used to be getting a room had the potential of being able to fit in 2 or more clients. Now, I’m finding in many cities, it’s more common to only have 1 client per hotel “booking” day (given you don’t get 24 hours, just the standard check in 3, checkout noon) which often causes me to be unable to see a noon to 3 p.m. client unless I reserve an extra day. I find if I’m “lucky” and can just happen to get schedules to line up, I’ll see more than 1 client. And of course the main thing, is the cost of hotels. After I pay for a room, I don’t end up with my actual price. Especially with special events like games, concerts, holidays: hotels jack their rates up, and if I need to host away from home: that’s coming right out of my earning. I also feel some clients book in-calls even if they can host, because they feel safer than having someone come to their place first. Of course I would be sure to bring it up, and lay it out ahead of time with the client. The decision would be between having a designated higher incall donation, or just manually have an amount added. Something like $50-$100 extra. Or if the person wishes to get the room themselves, by all means. By doing this, I would also want to cut out a lot of the “speculative” and “assumptive” things that go on. For example, some clients may see me posting in a city, and think I’m just going there by default with hotel ready and waiting. I have to remind them, it’s “by appointment only” anywhere I go. Even if I’m already planning to pass/go there. One guy didn’t want to pay deposit, but expected me to stop in his city AND get a hotel to host. Absolutely not. If I do that and the person fails to show up, I’m out the price of hotel, and my fee with no guarantee another client will fill the space for the 1 day I could book the room for. I ended up booking a different client in a nearby city who did confirm the session. I think it may also help with the “don’t get a hotel room just for me” phrases I get sometimes. Well then, would it be better when I have 2-3 clients lined up that day? Not going to happen. Most people lately often have too busy of a schedule, to meet all in the same day when I’m hosting.

It sounds good theoretically, but what you mention is simply speculative. Just because someone looks good, doesn’t guarantee a fortune in the pay for gay industry. I know this for a fact: I am on Adam4Adam and I may only get 1 client in a week or month out of a KILLING of replies. Many are interested until I bring up the money. Which is usually why within the first message or 2, I already have an auto reply set up that includes my rates. Which is the other point: just because someone thinks they can get paid, doesn’t guarantee they’ll get paid what they want. If you ask the average non-sex worker guy how much they’ll charge to do what we do: you’ll hear a crazy number like $500 just to suck their dick, and anything with sex would be like $1,000, $10,000, $100,000, $1,000,000 etc. But WE KNOW: the average “range” for an hour or 2 is generally in the $50 to $500 range. And yes, there’s people out there who think $50 is a good price to pay for sex. Not making fun of anyone but, I’ve heard offers of all sorts over the years 🤷🏾‍♂️ I think the real question is: why aren’t there more people willing to pay? Because at this point: I feel there’s already enough providers in most major cities. I know it doesn’t seem like it, and there “could” theoretically be more, but there doesn’t need to be more because; we haven’t even come into full decriminalization or de-stigmatization. If you have too many providers, the potential for profit will decline if there’s not enough buyers to do it. It’ll be like when I went to a strip club in Dallas once: there was like 25 dancers and 3 customers. There’s also been stories here and there, of people offering a guy paid sex, getting tattled on: and then being arrested (though I think it’s usually been the under 18 ones). There’s also been situations I’ve heard where someone reacted violently towards a guy, after offering a straight guy payment for sex. Obviously these are extreme examples but: it’s worth keeping in mind to be mindful, and DON’T solicit someone blindly, just as an escort (especially gay escort) shouldn’t solicit clients blindly either. I personally wouldn’t think into much. Even as a fantasy. Simply because: someone could say, “why aren’t more gay men into women? They would make BEAUTIFUL babies” lol. Well I would find that kinda offensive tbh. Even though it’s meant to be a compliment. I am what I am. And as others have mentioned, it’s not something everyone should or could do. Most people are of the concept: you only have sex with someone you’re attracted to. And then you have others (including other gays) who believe money should only be earned by working 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., and that sex is a God given right to give/get for free 👎🏾

In my experience: I’m finding the #1 thing that breeds a timewaster, is people not reading the ads. I know this for a fact because, I recently had to emphasize it in my profile. If someone reaches out and asks what my rate is, I know they haven’t read the ad. If they seem shocked or resistant to sending a deposit, then I know they haven’t read the ad. Then when it’s an issue, it’s almost a default: time waster. I’ve been able to make my interactions just a little bit easier, by just making sure they have read the ad, which also directs to my website. Once I get that part out the way, then we’re on the right track. But just clicking on an ad and texting blindly, without reading anything: almost defeats the purpose of writing anything at all.

Well whaddaya know: I decided to check my number, and have a couple or so reports myself 😂 Interestingly enough, I know exactly who 1 of them was: from a “couple” who sent pictures of “themselves” (And I doubt it was even real, looked like some roided up Instagram couple) who texted me from 6:57 a.m. on a Sunday, all the way til 5:30 p.m. that day. And hadn’t sent an address or confirmation at any point during that time, just a barrage of questions. And claims “he got mad because I asked if partys”. Lol No, the reason I got “very angry” 🙃 is because: #1: texted me at 7 in the morning #2: spent 9 hours exchanging texts #3: stopped texting entirely after giving me a time “they were thinking” (with no address included). I then responded with a time I could meet, and didn’t get a single reply for the rest of the night 🤔 So I can agree to an extent that, the platform can be abused. And I don’t even think the person was who they claimed to be. I had already confirmed before, there was someone who contacted me and sent me pictures of a gay couple, claiming he wanted an appointment. “They” ended up flaking out. Turns out, it was some completely different guy married to a woman, looking nothing like the photos of the “Gay couple” he sent (I have other ways than Mr. Number to verify). So, the reviews are one thing: but there’s also fake people posting fake reviews and just trying to put a dent in someone’s reputation. However, reviews on RM are likely more accurate than that site. My only gripe with Mr. Number is, although you can “write your own report” you can’t directly respond to a report. And their editing of a report is just screwy, and will simply add another report.

Mister or Mrs. number, or not: it’s still important to have screening methods. Even if that app wasn’t around, I’d still be having my own way of verifying. In my experience, majority of the ones reported: have indeed been a case of, “I should have read the reviews”. I think there just needs to be a let go of expecting full anonymity and no accountability. I have learned women escorts often ask for ID, employment info, references from other providers, and not to mention deposits. I feel the gay hiring scene is stuck in operating on “trust the client, fuck the escort”. And now people want to talk about how we shouldn’t even have a platform to improve safety or avoid red flags? Perhaps remove the personal standpoint and focus moreso on the bigger picture: far too many flakes out there. And simply not hiring a first choice is just scratching the surface. There’s some out there who have nothing much better to do in their spare time, than to troll RM ads . So, it’s only wise to have something to say: “hey this was my experience: proceed with discernment ”