Jamie21

Definitely agree with Jarrod. I never understand it. I’ll get a text asking if I’m available for a massage on x date /time. I reply quickly with details of my availability and then.....nothing. No response not even a message saying “I changed my mind”. Why do that??
I’m professional, I have a website, I take my work seriously, I prepare for clients, I make myself available, I cancel personal appointments all to accommodate a client’s request....then as happened today my client who booked yesterday messaged an hour before the time to cancel.
 
I understand things happen, but an hour before the time? I believe in a lot of these situations the client has just changed their mind or got cold feet. It’s very disappointing.
 
Other times I’ve had a client book a couple of weeks in advance. Lots of messages went back and forth to make the booking. Including details of what he wanted. I messaged him the day before to confirm (as I always do) and he replies by saying “oh sorry I forgot mate, I’ve got something else booked now”. So I guess had I not checked he’d have just not turned up and I’d be waiting with everything ready. Why book it if you then aren’t so interested that you even note it in your diary?
 
Even worse, I had a request for a 4 hands with a masseuse and me. The client had specific requests which I was able to meet by contacting one of the masseuses I work with. She made arrangements for the date, so did I. It took a lot of time to schedule it and find the right masseuse. Then, the day before the client cancelled because of “issues at home”. Fortunately he did agree to pay to cover the costs my masseuse incurred (she was travelling a long way for the session) which was decent of him. But the worse thing is all the time wasted.
 
I think there’s an attitude that sex workers time is unimportant and we can be treated with disregard. If something better comes up they choose to either cancel at short notice or just not turn up. I definitely value my clients who book and do turn up, they get great service. I’ve learned the signs that indicate whether someone is unlikely to turn up. If they book and don’t show up I’ll never book them again. If they cancel last minute without genuine reason they’ll also never get a booking again.

As a client, I like to book in advance so I can block out my schedule since things tend to come up for me randomly at times. Without scheduling while I know I'm free, there's always a chance something immediate might arise. I have never once flaked nor cancelled on a guy. I even trekked out to an appointment when I wasn't feeling great because I hadn't been able to get ahold of him to cancel the day before.
 
My time is super important to me so I understand what it's like when someone wastes it. Ergo, I tried to never waste someone else's.

Yes indeed words matter. He’d send messages using words like “love” and “we are brothers”. I couldn’t respond in the same terms. Very difficult indeed to let him down without hurting his feelings.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

If my client is horny it makes me horny.

Bring it on!!

Bring it on!!

Bring it on!!

All of this advice is great, especially about the high levels of professionalism required to do it properly. I’ve been doing sensual massage for 5 years now and am always learning new things about the work.
 
However the single most important tip I would give is to treat each client as if he is the most beautiful and sexy guy in the world for the time that he is with you. Give him your total focus, pay attention to how he reacts to your touch (everyone has different areas of their body that get them going - often unusual areas, so explore them) and treat him like he’s your hottest date regardless of any attraction you may or may not have. I learned that not every client is who I’d go for if it was a dating situation but there’s always something you can find that is attractive about him. Some of the most erotic and sexy massages have been with guys I’d not normally be attracted to.
 
You also need to decide what your limits are and stick to them. Only once did I have a client pressurise me into doing something I wasn’t happy doing and I decided after that to be really strict on what’s included and what isn’t. I do include fucking (as top) if the client wants it but I don’t charge extra for it because I say to them that it has to feel right for both of us. That way I’m not under pressure to perform if it’s the 4th client of the day for example. If they want me to bottom I do charge extra. I think it’s important to be clear in your offering what’s included (subject to any legal restrictions on what’s possible in your jurisdiction). And whilst the erotic and sexual parts of the massage are important don’t forget that you must give a great proper massage. Learn good effleurage strokes, learn head massage, have a speciality (head massage is good). Important to be a great masseur as well as able to bring a guy to climax.
 
Doing naked sensual massage is a fantastic job, meeting new people and helping them explore their sexuality. I’m glad I’ve been able to open up new experiences for my clients.

I’m based in London
See my website sensualtouchco.com
You’ll be most welcome if you ever visit London.

I’m based in London
See my website sensualtouchco.com
You’ll be most welcome if you ever visit London.

Thanks! I will definitely reach out when I am able to get to the UK again.

All of this advice is great, especially about the high levels of professionalism required to do it properly. I’ve been doing sensual massage for 5 years now and am always learning new things about the work.
 
However the single most important tip I would give is to treat each client as if he is the most beautiful and sexy guy in the world for the time that he is with you. Give him your total focus, pay attention to how he reacts to your touch (everyone has different areas of their body that get them going - often unusual areas, so explore them) and treat him like he’s your hottest date regardless of any attraction you may or may not have. I learned that not every client is who I’d go for if it was a dating situation but there’s always something you can find that is attractive about him. Some of the most erotic and sexy massages have been with guys I’d not normally be attracted to.
 
You also need to decide what your limits are and stick to them. Only once did I have a client pressurise me into doing something I wasn’t happy doing and I decided after that to be really strict on what’s included and what isn’t. I do include fucking (as top) if the client wants it but I don’t charge extra for it because I say to them that it has to feel right for both of us. That way I’m not under pressure to perform if it’s the 4th client of the day for example. If they want me to bottom I do charge extra. I think it’s important to be clear in your offering what’s included (subject to any legal restrictions on what’s possible in your jurisdiction). And whilst the erotic and sexual parts of the massage are important don’t forget that you must give a great proper massage. Learn good effleurage strokes, learn head massage, have a speciality (head massage is good). Important to be a great masseur as well as able to bring a guy to climax.
 
Doing naked sensual massage is a fantastic job, meeting new people and helping them explore their sexuality. I’m glad I’ve been able to open up new experiences for my clients.