socurious

Here's a reminder that even with the hundreds of men in NYC, there is still room to serve a niche.  This person could not find anyone he would like to hire in NYC.
Maybe @socurious should focus on what he can bring to the table as a mature 40 year old man.  You know, approach the Daddy angle.  There's plenty of young guys who want to play with Daddy's, although it may involve some kissing and penetration, not just body worship.
 
 

I didn’t realize he’s 40 - a little late to be entering this game statistically, but not impossible.  just improbable.
 Given he won’t kiss, won’t travel, doesn’t like to do his own marketing research & seems to be picky about the people he engages with - this career choice does not look promising.  
 

Having familiarity with Dallas myself: it’s definitely not as competitive as NYC…but has over the years grown to be nearly as competitive as San Diego. I started there back when there were only 10 escorts in Dallas. Now there’s like, 70? With a mix of traveling and locals.
Also, keep in mind that buying sex work in Texas is now considered (in a loosely defined way) a felony. I know that’s not fun to talk about, but it’s always good to be aware of what’s being passed in legislation and how that could affect potential client’s behavior and your bottom line. 
 
No surprise to me because Texas and Dallas can be very conservative, and known for being Bible 📖 thumping state. Some of the largest mega churches in the nation, are located in Texas. Nothing wrong with the Bible or churches, it’s just that when it becomes a weapon to disenfranchise people, that’s the problem. One can argue that’s good for business, catching the sinners on their days off: but do you really want to deal with that? 
 

Meh, bleh. How do you know that? 
 
Of course they may not complain directly to you or anyone else about their clients, but you never know what they talk about behind closed doors. They probably don’t even post on here, because they don’t want to give that impression…as they shouldn’t if they aren’t in a position to share and discuss such things without fear of criticism.
 
But you can’t make a blanket statement to imply certain providers never contend with clients, hotel costs or cancellations. You can’t be pejorative towards those who might not like, but want to change or improve certain things in the business. Sure YOU may not HEAR these people talk about such things, but are you with them 24/7, watching what they do to handle the situations that all providers face? Because I’ve been in the gay scene for awhile…I know what goes on behind closed doors. Anyone can make you to think, what they want you to think. 
 
And even if you don’t hear it from them, I’ve spoken to clients who have a different story to tell. So don’t assume there’s “perfect” guys out there who have it all together. You’re just getting a glimpse.
There’s not a single guy out there in the gay community that I know: who isn’t dealing with a personal challenge of sorts, but on the outside and in conversations: portrays like they have it all together. Everybody has problems. Which is okay. But don’t make it like the guys who may be in better shape financially or getting more clients, are somehow immune to the issues at hand and never complain. They probably just never complain to you. 
 
I only say that because it’s a lot of dudes out there putting on this fake facade, and then look down on those who may be going thru something. That doesn’t intimidate me. People need to be more real, especially gay people: and uplift each other, not put one another down.

You've been asking about specific places to visit and I have a feeling this trend will go on. 
No city is good for everyone because of many different reasons and cities that work for you may not work for others. Besides some trips to the same city are better than others and having a city that's good for you doesn't guarantee you'll always have a successful trip there either. 
I would suggest you run an ad in San Diego to do some "canvassing", see how many guys are interested in hiring you, and if you think the trip is worth go there. 
You can also run the ad hoping to get an "anchor client", someone who is willing to pay for your trip and hire you for a long period of time during your trip and if you think it's good idea you can stay on your own after. 
Btw how come you don't have a link to your ad as signature in all your posts? 

NOTHING compares to NYC....
You can also see how many pages of escorts are in each city to see how competitive it is.

I can’t speak to NYC but many other members here can. My understanding is that it’s the largest market in the United Sates. Dallas/ Ft Worth is a large metroplex area. It’s on track to exceed Chicago within the next 15 or so years. 
Dallas constantly has many traveling providers because it’s 1) a major city and 2) an air transportation hub. Southwest and American are based there, and several major airlines have routes there. 
There’s plenty of room for competition in Dallas, but if you try there, see what you can do to differentiate yourself from everyone else. That’s good advice anywhere, but it’s easy to get lost in the crowd in Dallas. Anywhere is going to be less of a crowd than NYC, so maybe that doesn’t matter for your purposes.
You might try a trip to Dallas just to see how the locals respond to you. Try a week and see how it goes. There’s no lack of demand, just varying tastes and schedules. You might even bump into several traveling clients, since it’s such a hub and travelers have more urgency to book in a given timeframe than locals.

I agree with most of the above. Every provider is different. You can charge whatever you want and it doesn’t have to match what the average is in a given area. It just has to make business sense for you. An escort’s advertised rate for one hour does mean something, but it’s more nuanced than that.
I have different rates for massage than I do for escort service, for example, and I even do some breakout pricing for clients who want a blend of both in a single session. My escort rate is $300/hr which covers all the basics and even some niche interest activities. I discount my rate for longer hires, which is a lot of my business. You might find rates similar to mine in almost all major US cities. Higher in NYC/LA/SF etc, and lower in the American heartland. I can’t speak for everyone or give you an average rate, but mine is probably not very far off from a lot of other guys around SD.
You get a LOT of outlier guys around SD and LA charging 5 or even $600+ for a single hour of service, but they can’t possibly be that busy working full time as an in person service escort. Most of them are doing fans sites work and/or have other jobs, and take the odd client once in a while who is willing to pay an outrageous fee for a specific look, body type, or niche service. The serious escorts who do this every day full time for their main living charge closer to the going rates. Even the part time guys often fall within the going rates: $250/hr at the low end, up to $350+/hr at the high end, excluding the unserious outliers I mentioned above.
Some of that pricing becomes irrelevant when you’re entertaining clients for longer hires, like half a day, overnight, or multiple days. Those total in the thousands. Clients hire me most frequently for five hours, all-inclusive for $1000. That’s only $200/hr, but makes a hell of a lot more business sense for me. The per-hr rate is not everything. It’s just a benchmark. It’s the closest thing we have to something objective to compare. Like @SouthOfTheBorder mentioned, there are a lot of variables at play. You do what makes business sense for YOU, not what you perceive everyone else does.
@socurious No kissing is quite limiting. Your pool of potential clients will be much smaller if you either can’t or won’t do all the vanilla basics like kissing, touching, jerking off, cuddling, oral, and anal (either or both positions), and preferably flexible on protected vs unprotected. The majority of clients want one or more of those activities, usually multiple. Most clients willing to pay close to the going rate want some kind of penetration, but not all.
To be successful, you need to appeal to a wide variety of people. If you’re not all of the following: in your 20s (true age), conventionally extremely attractive, and fit, you have to appeal to the majority of clients in other ways. Some of those are: providing all the basic (and maybe some niche) services, demonstrating superior skills, and being easy to work with, and to a much lesser degree, how you price your services. I agree with many of the points @SouthOfTheBorder mentioned too. Price is probably the least important factor of all, assuming you’re not pricing way below or way above the going rates.
 

this is super smart for many reasons.
getting ready & doing an outcall requires the same exact effort to prepare/travel whether one hour or 3 hours - so why not discount the rate to get an overall bigger spend ?  1 hour at $300 vs 3hours at $600 ? Or similar …..yet, vast majority of escorts do not offer this and some will balk at any discounts whatsoever on some sort of principal when it makes perfect business sense. Most do not get the concept.
And the clients that hire longer multi-hour appointments have more money & want a more relaxed time with breaks for drinks, etc. it’s not like 3 hours of nonstop sex. Plus, the longer appointments allow escort to develop a relationship with client to increase probability of additional hires and longer times.  This is very simple, yet very few do it.  Some offer overnight rates - I don’t get that personally, I have zero interest hiring someone to sleep.

^This guy gets it!

an escorts listed rate means nothing.  
a rate that a,client will pay has so many variables that it’s impossible to quantify without complete information & seeing the escorts profile.  even then, what somone will pay is not some standard formula.  how many positive reviews does the escort have, how long has the person been advertising as an escort, what do the pics look like & what will the escort do ? Is the escort a porn star, or does the escort have a big social media following like OnlyFans or Instagram ?
Based on a previous threade, you said no kissing.  That’s a huge turn-off for majority of potential clients & completely removes most potential clients from ever hiring you.  You also said only one review - that’s another problem where people won’t hire you.  Unless you have some special type of service, appeal to a niche group, or are social media famous ……it doesn’t look good. 
Becoming a successful escort takes work and some self-awareness re: what you’re willing to do vs what people are willing to pay.  I can’t imagine anyone paying $300 for an escort with one review & wont do the basics.  The chances are worse once you get outside of the major cities.  it’s not an easy job and many did that out the hard way.
Any city that has nice weather & decent quality of life is going to be saturated with escorts. That’s a fact 

 
 
 

Agree 100% with @SouthOfTheBorder. You have to be good, no matter where you’re working. Some markets will be better for certain providers, but overall, the best providers do well most anywhere that has a sizable population to support them. Traveling is another strategy. Moving to San Diego won’t magically change your businesses overnight.
I’m from San Diego originally and currently work in the San Diego market as a masseur and escort. I was successful in Dallas for a couple years too. 
Yes, SD is a smaller city, and a smaller market, and more difficult in some ways. We have more than plenty of provider choices, and a great many traveling providers constantly passing through. Fewer permanent guys, but plenty relative to the population.
The gay porn industry is anchored here, and by extension, LA and the rest of SoCal. Many years ago I used to work my desk job on the floor above “Suite 703”. It actually was located on the seventh floor of my building. Sean Cody is here, among many others. A lot of those models are active here, or retire and remain in San Diego long term. I know some of them. A lot of them escort or do massage, or personal training. For example, you might recognize Anthony from his films: https://rentmasseur.com/AnthonySD
All that to say, there is a lot of fierce competition here among providers. We may be a smaller city relative to NYC, LA and others, but we have no lack of attractive working men. Arguably the *quality* massage talent is lacking. We have lots of rub and tug guys who get by seeing one and done clients. There are a just a handful of good masseurs. For escorts, we are spoiled for choice. Lots of those.
There’s what we like to call the “sunshine tax”, which means the cost of loving is very high, but wages across the board remain relatively very low in comparison to the high cost of living. This year SD is ranked the most expensive city to live in the US, topping even SF, Miami and NYC. Most years prior it was ranked below those. People move here because they love being here and are willing to sacrifice some aspect of their standard of living for the trade off of enjoying the less tangible benefits of living in SD. Having access to beautiful beaches, nice weather, the laid back attitude, lots of metropolitan institutions, and a thriving economy, among many perks of living here.
NYC metro is also very expensive, so it may not matter if you’re comparing the two, but keep in mind business is challenging anywhere you go. You have to master your craft and how you do business. After that, you can go almost anywhere that makes sense and do well.

I don’t think escorting is that much different from other professions.  There are people that excel & become the best, regardless of where they are located - of course, competition is a factor to consider because in a super competitive market it requires a lot of work & dedication to make it.  
The very best providers are in NYC because it’s the #1 market in the world for potential income - that’s based on the number of providers working there & the rates they charge. There are very few other places that have an affluent population, lots of gay men with disposable income and a steady influx of tourists & executives with money to burn.  London maybe comes close, yet the rates are less.  LA would be right up there too.  The top tier guys I know & hire are based in NY/Miami (between the two cities) and then have a loose travel schedule around then world based on where their target clients go at specific times.  And they keep in mind that can’t charge NY prices in Greece, for example. 
Versus a relatively small city like San Diego that can’t compare to NYC in any way.  It’s not close enough to LA to make both cities work together. And because of the small size it would be an everyone knows everyone situation very quickly.  Providers based in small cities have their own set of complaints - small base of potential clients and people unwilling to pay. 
It really comes down to a lifestyle choice & being satisfied with those circumstances.  I’ve found that people seeking geographic solutions to their issues in specific places very seldom cure the problem with a move.  The issues seem to follow that person wherever they go.  But, way easier & cheaper places to live than NY where almost everything is complicated & expensive. 
The things that make an escort successful are reliability, professionalism, positive attitude & the ability to quickly determine which potential clients are right for them vs the time-wasters/flakes.  Most people think it’s being the youngest, best body or best looking- yet none of that matters if the person is unreliable or a flake. The top-tier guys I know never ever complain about their clients, hotel costs, cancellations, the cities where they work or anything else: they just make it happen. The true mark of any kind of professional is when it just appears effortless to those on the outside. And, the successful guys have figured out that reviews & reputation are everything in an increasingly online & competitive marketplace. 

Is he totally masculine? I mean like straight-acting. I say straight-acting because many gay men I've met would say they are masculine but when you meet them in person you can tell the strong gay vibe going on even if they don't seem too effeminate. I know you all understand exactly what I mean. 

I'm thinking in moving to San Diego and need to know. Here in NYC the market is oversaturated (way too compititive for newbies like me). 

I'm thinking in moving to San Diego and need to know. Here in NYC the market is oversaturated (way too compititive for newbies like me). 

Maybe he changed his name because he hopes people will give him Thebenefit of the doubt?  🤣

You even responded in that thread.

Is he totally masculine? I mean like straight-acting. I say straight-acting because many gay men I've met would say they are masculine but when you meet them in person you can tell the strong gay vibe going on even if they don't seem too effeminate. I know you all understand exactly what I mean. 

Here is a source. Their poppers are milder than the more well known labels. The payment process was a little roundabout, but you can obtain poppers pretty easily online.
I tried the linked brand below hoping to actually enjoy poppers. They were milder than most but for me it was a bust. I hate poppers of any strength or brand, period. Taking a hit makes me go limp, lightheaded (in a bad way) and feel all kinds of sick. More power to the large segment of the community that enjoys using them.
In person, in sex shops, you have to ask for “popcorn”, at least here in California. I’m assuming there’s a legal reason they can’t explicitly use the common street name. Technically, poppers are still illegal, but still widely available everywhere. The laws regarding poppers are not strictly enforced, and in some pockets of the US not enforced at all.
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Informational thread here
 

Do you guys think we providers should tell the client directly that we don't kiss or the "not listed" thing on RM is just enough for them to know? I always try to encourage my clients to ask anything before we meet.

Oklahoma City seems to have a few nice museums. Salt Lake City seems like a watered down Denver. 

OKC is an underserved market. They can always use traveling providers and masseurs. I did well there and plan to return. 

You can work while traveling if you decide to visit somewhere in the USA. I just think the whole "working thing" will ruin the vacation experience. But that's just me.

True. Good to always ask and confirm, because many advertisers on RM just check all the boxes to up the odds and some frankly don't even know what many of them are especially if they're from other countries. Some think that putting "Native American" means they are from the USA or live here now! 😄