FrankR

There is no requirement that you be explicit in leaving a comment on the provider’s thread. You can simply say: “Based on my experience with him, I would not recommend. We ended up not meeting after initial communication”. Some members may try to get you to expand on that - but you dont have to add any additional details.

Then you are truly going to hate my “dogs of the Dow” strategy. 😆 To keep the peace between us…perhaps we can talk about the “scoundrels of the S&P” Instead? 😋

First of all…breathe and relax. The guy is probably trying to get you so freaked out that you will send him money. And once you do that, he will ask for more money and keep asking. Your to-do list: 1. Dont respond to him. If you had a fixed appointment (day/time/location) and you did not show up, in my book you owe him a cancellation fee, otherwise you owe him nothing. 2. If he keeps bugging you, simply respond: “You are harassing me and I am keeping evidence of your threats - if you dont stop immediately my attorney will contact the police and file a complaint”. 3. Never use your actual phone number when setting up appointments with guys. Get the “Burner” app which gives you a disposable number you can use. You can even link Whatsapp to that number if you wish. I dont know how he could hack you with your phone number. You can reach out to Rentmen to have your account reopened and the password reset. 4. Remember, scammers rely on fear to get to you. Brush it off, dont engage and move on.

But does it come in a “soap on a rope” design?? 😆

He’s been around for a while. Discussed in other threads but keeps changing his rentmen name. Only thing I recall from discussion was that he appeared older than pics indicate (have been using the same pics since before 2020).

I do. So does the market - it is up 17% today after announcing a dividend for the first time. Hard to make the case that a recession is imminent when tech companies are prospering. Nasdaq 100 index is up something like 80% for the year. Is a recession coming. Yes. Is it imminent? Does not appear so. Should you be ready, just in case? Always.

I have had two experiences with guys that I believe are recent immigrants. Both were for massages and both looked like their pics. Only one appeared to be trained but both stuck around for the full 90 minutes. There was no erotic element to either appointment though from his social media the one guy is clearly gay - the other did not have social media and I got the sense he was straight. Neither spoke English and we did not get into their living arrangements - both indicated they traveling into the city from an outer burrough. Both charged less than the standard rate for my city for a massage but I paid the standard rate and tip. The SayHi app is great for those that do not speak Spanish. They both preferred Whatsapp for communication post introductions on Adam4Adam.

Financially speaking I am definitely better off. Funny enough, my current average monthly expenses are only up 2% from 2019. I’ve never been a big spender - the bulk of my increased net income since 2019 has gone into investments.

We all agree - seeking needs a different approach. Rentmen may be a better fit for most that do not have the time or desire to cultivate a friend with benefits arrangement. Others prefer the seeking route. You do you.

Have had the same experience. Glutes are one of the largest muscles in the body. If not given due attention, I am not getting value for my money and wont repeat. There is also the opposite problem…they get to the glutes and the massage stops there as things escalate to erotic. Also not what I am looking for to be honest.

From experience, the best advice I can give you is to communicate and set boundaries. Make sure they know the money will run out on X date if they keep going at this pace. Make sure they know you will not be supporting them further when that happens. Give them the contact details of a financial councilor who can help them budget. You may be tempted to “help”, but enabling isnt helping. Set boundaries and stick to it. You may need to start growing a thick skin. I had to. 🙈

I have only been in the game, so to speak, for about 10 years. My total expenditure is far lower than your estimate - not gonna give you the exact number but lets just say if I had it piled up today, I could be driving a new Porsche tomorrow. Interesting enough, I slowed down significantly during Covid and have not returned to my pre-Covid pace as of yet. Should I add that to my goals for 2024?? 😋

Is it somebody you can recommend? If so, please provide a link to a thread or profile… Of course there are no guarantees, but a recommendation may be a good start.

The article doesnt dive very deep. It appears the increase is driven by rent and housing costs based on analysis I reviewed. That being said, most of the people I talk to are feeling better about the economy and the progress made in keeping inflation in check…but they do expect another increase in Fed rates. 🤷‍♂️

Guys strutting around in leather, trying to get laid. It’s not complicated.

You do get it. As you said: most gay men. The world isnt a black and white place - its shades of gray and all colors of the rainbow. He provides a great therapeutic massage. And maybe a bit more if the chemistry is right. If that’s not your thing, that is fine then avoid him - but for others who arent looking for the type of home run you are after, it is exactly what they are looking for. You do you.

The whole thing is (still) just weird. Call me nuts, but from the numbers mentioned in the article it is hard to understand how she got herself into this position. https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/columnist/brennan/2024/01/06/mary-lou-retton-nearly-half-million-dollars-donations-how-spent/72132567007/

No debt. I use my cards for the benefits, but pay them off monthly.

I enjoy your annual tradition…however I think it is time to add more to it. Specifically, an annual audit of all your…assets…may be appropriate! 😉

He sounds like a nice guy and treats you like a valued client. I am a business professional and as I get to know my clients better, we often exchange details at a personal level. But I never confuse our friendly interaction as “friendship” - we are friendly, but it is a professional relationship where they pay me for my services. I would recommend that you be super sure that it is friendship and not just a friendly situation. Dont get carried away and emotionally involved - it is easy to make the wrong determination and that can end up being hurtful to both of you. Good luck!

Be very clear about your expectations. He tends to over promise. I wont repeat - we miscommunicated and it was blamed on lack of language skills.

I use the Pi app and its ability to anticipate my follow up “why” question is rather good. It is also quite sassy which I find delightful.

Ha!

I am a big fan of Daniel Radcliffe. He was lucky in the sense that his parents were financially savvy and took great care of his growing Harry Potter income stream despite his going through a rough time with substance abuse. I remember reading a few features (one from Cosmopolitan comes to mind) about how frugal he actually is. He donates a lot of dough - including to the Trevor Project, one if my personal favorite charities.

Think twice. You are setting yourself up for a lot of financial pain and drama. Identity theft seems to be the most common outcome - I speak from experience in helping friends recover from such exploits. If you choose to procees - visit rentmen and seeking and look for guys that are into that.