JEC

Not sure there are any, unless you go to a private cubicle 🐷

Hello, sorry for your profound loss. That is a lot to deal with in such a short time. I lost my mom when I was 9 which was very difficult, then my dad just 3 years ago...he was 85. My step mother is still alive and I am thankful for her presence in my life....but she has health issues and I know our remaining time together is precious. I have a husband (and his family), no kids, but I'm never lonely. The fact that you never came out to them is, well, history. You cannot change that now, so why focus on it? And coming out can be such an excruciating experience (esp with parents) consider it a blessing you did not have to experience it. Age is often a factor in beliefs, hopefully your siblings would be supportive when you do come out. Regarding being lonely, it is common now for gays to marry, and adopt children. My husband and I missed that window (due to our age) but if we were 28 today we would probably be parents if not working on it. While painful, maybe your parents unfortunate passing can ultimately be freeing for you to live an otherwise full life that might have have been limited by cultural religious and other beliefs. Even if you don't marry, having a relationship is possible! I'm going to echo things others have said. Seeing a counselor familiar with gay issues would likely be very helpful to you. There is no shame in this, it takes incredible strength to seek help, then to get it. You are strong enough, you already asked us! Also, if you don't live in an area with a sizable gay population, consider relocating....there are social groups, sporting groups, country dancing, all sorts of ways to be with others and not be lonely. Boston MA here, there are plenty of queer folk here! Our life situation is the result of a series of decisions. Different decisions can create a different situation. Take good care, and take things one day at a time. Jack

Client here, on one of my early hires I used the term prostitute and immediately realized my error and apologized profusely. The escort was unfazed and said they weren't bothered by it. Like asking a woman if she's pregnant....you never do that more than once!

I met with Jay Dymel about 3 months before he sadly died in 2019

Yawn.

I have enjoyed his porn. He has a husband and they do a lot of porn together too (can't remember his name). Greg has a nice body and delicious ass....

@BuffaloKyle is right, MRNA technology has been in development for decades, and found the perfect application at the perfect time (meaning, the technology was tested and proven) with the COVID pandemic. There are dozens of other clinical trials in progress using MRNA to attack other diseases...including HIV and some forms of cancer. MRNA is a major game changer, 10 years from now we will have vanquished many diseases and slowed and impact of many more. The early evidence behind the MRNA/HIV vaccine is very promising for both prevention AND as an (almost) cure for HIV. Early trials did not remove the virus entirely from the body, but eliminated the ability of the virus to attack the immune system. HIV basically becomes impotent. We may be on the cusp of the end of the HIV pandemic! Fingers crossed!

Antonio, thanks for sharing your challenges with us. As I read your post I thought "this was me 20 years ago" (I'm 58 now). At the time I was newly in a Director position, caring for my aging grandparents, going to school at night and renovating our first house. I felt overwhelmed with all of the stresses, the elderly grandparents being the most stressful of all. A few suggestions, hopefully they will help. A common thing emerging leaders need to learn is how to empower their staff, and delegate. This means having conversations with them about their aspirations and interests, and giving them work even if they are "stretch goals". If you are working that many hours...you are not delegating enough. Staff are willing to take on additional work if it interests them, the work is meaningful, and you reward them. Oh, and how does your calendar look? If it's full of meetings all day....you are not delegating enough. To lead effectively, you need free time to plan, organize, think about how to lead, and manage your relationships with your peers and other leaders. How are you managing your time? Use the Covey time management matrix. Many emerging managers/leaders equate being busy (even too busy) with success. If you are too busy doing tasks to lead your team, something needs to change. Get help where you need it. There are agencies who help with elder care, even advising families like yours. These are heart-wrenching decisions and especially difficult for the inexperienced. Sounds like you are getting some help from other relatives too, that's good, but they all have their lives to live too. Make the hard decisions. It is difficult to manage relationships with aging parents, in many ways the roles have reversed....you are the adult and they are the child, but they are not willing to let go. It's a balancing act for sure, but don't be afraid to make hard decisions if they are in the best interest of your parents (and your sanity). See a counselor or a coach. Managing aging parents includes real life, grown up, and complicated decisions. Because many gay men are grownups without children we have been spared some of these "adult" responsibilities which makes them weigh even more heavily on us; and we lack the experience to work through them. Most ppl in your shoes have already raised a family. Take care of yourself first. Make sure you are getting your sleep, eating well and working out (if you like to). You can't take care of others if you aren't taking care of yourself, and it sounds like you are reaching that breaking point. I hope this is helpful and I haven't crossed any boundaries. Good luck on your journey, this is all fixable.....not overnight. One day at a time my friend, and be kind to yourself along the way. Jack

He has a phone number listed now?

We went to The Eagle back in October, it was fun. Was double vax'd and newly boosted at the time, and this was before Omicron hit so we went without masks. NYC requires everyone to show vaccine status to get into a bar/restaurant.

I find food experiences to be one of the most enjoyable parts of travel. It's not unusual for me to spend a few hours researching restaurant/food places before any trip so I have already identified many choices. If the cost of food is an issue, there are plenty of cheap eats, especially ethnic food places in most cities...including foot carts and food stalls. We often rent apartments when we travel, when we do we will often buy some staples and have breakfast in the apartment; and might make dinner at home once or twice during our trip.

@traxton we went to Amaria during thanksgiving week a few weeks ago. On that day there were about 25 guys there. That seemed like more than normal because they made a point of saying that they had hired extra masseurs (there were 3 I think). I got mine assigned to me, but the guys who run the event are chill and I think if I had requested one specifically they would have accommodated my request. I also think I could have had more than 1 if I was willing to pay extra. The massage is free, of course you should tip and extras are extra. My masseur was a cute Mexican guy, not porn star material but very cute and sexy. He gave me oral, I think I could have had more but didn't go for it. I tipped 500 pesos, which is $24 US but a lot of money MX. If you use their transportation (a Humvee), they have 2 pickups in ZR in the morning and 2 drop-offs in the afternoon so you could spend 6-8 hours there. There were lockers, we just brought a knapsack and put our stuff in that. Note they sell cannabis infused cookies and mescal (like tequila) at the resort too (ask at the bar), we bought cookies and they were lovely (1/4 cookie is all you need to start). It's a chill event, mostly older guys all body types but a few younger ones too. There was no visible sex (masseurs were in a private room), but if some broke out I think that would have been allowed. The ride to/from is interesting, it's about a 20 minute ride thru some very rural and impoverished areas. Enjoy, it's really a cool event.

IMHO the whole "free tests" and "free masks" is an attempt to mop up (or, distract from) the testing mess. Sadly, I think it's only contributing to the lack of tests and testing given limited supply. 🙄

IMHO it's simplistic (and judgmental) to simply say that alcoholics and obese people simple can't control themselves. There are many factors that contribute to a persons weight: genetics, medical conditions, medications, and psychological makeup. It's much more complex than simply saying "eat better". Psychological makeup is the most complex of these. Each person grew up and lives with a different life experience, different physical abilities (to exercise for example), different interests, different parents, different training, education, other "social determinants of health" which may include trauma, abuse and resulting in low self-esteem, depression or other. Not everybody wants to work out or go to the gym, or is able to. Food addiction is a form of addiction, as is alcoholism. But not everyone who is obese is a food addict. So, why doesn't someone just put the heroin down, or the meth, or oxy? The fact that we still have these beliefs (and stigma) is why addiction is still so prevalent. It is a disease: part nature and part nurture. And one we still haven't figured out how to conquer. There is a lot of addiction in my family. I "get" that we don't want to be victimized by it, and it's uncomfortable to talk about it. We need to protect ourselves. But I hope we can have some compassion for people with this dreaded disease.

Interesting that Boston is a top search term, yet 11th in terms of members. I wonder if it has to do with the lack of talent here in Boston? 😲

"Alcoholism" means dependence / physical addiction, it's part of a broader spectrum of alcohol abuse called AUD: What is alcohol use disorder (AUD)? For most adults, moderate alcohol use is probably not harmful. However, about 18 million adult Americans have an alcohol use disorder (AUD). This means that their drinking causes distress and harm. AUD can range from mild to severe, depending on the symptoms. Severe AUD is sometimes called alcoholism or alcohol dependence. AUD is a disease that causes: Craving - a strong need to drink Loss of control - not being able to stop drinking once you've started Negative emotional state - feeling anxious and irritable when you are not drinking

@purplekow agree with this entirely. My luck was only this bad when I first started and got better as I got better with screening my hires. Now, I rarely get a "miss".

Will be helpful to know if you have any type(s) you are attracted (tall/short? fem/masc? muscular/slim?), are you looking for top/bottom/verse?

We also enjoyed Amaria. Mostly an older crowd but a few 40s and 30s when we were there. Def a chill friendly vibe, and the massage (w/he) made the day. They also sell THC infused cookies and Mezcal (liquor like tequila) there if you ask, which we enjoyed.

Several of my hires are also on OF, I haven't found a difference with guys with/without OF. If they have a successful OF page and still take clients, they must like to hook....they're making way more money on OF.

@Jarrod_Uncut the point is not to stay longer, it's to post your availability before you arrive in a new city. I'm generally looking to schedule 1-2 weeks out. When I see a provider "pop up" who I would like to see I can rarely meet that same day, or even next 48 hours.

I also find this frustrating. As someone who plays on the DL and having a very busy job & life I always have to schedule my visits in advance. Having a few days notice significantly increases the likelihood I can connect with someone. Jack

Consider Providence RI. It's one hour train ride to Boston and 2.5 to NYC. Much lower cost of living than both. Some guys live in Providence and list "Boston" as their market on RM.

Colby and his husband Micky have their own porn studio with an extensive repertoire. They are one of my favorite studios b/c (1) colby and mickey are both hot AF (2) the boys they film with are also hot AF (3) the shooting is authentic....it's just hot sex and there is real chemistry, no staged/directed crap. Colby is a hot top, who flips occasionally (which revs my engine); and Mickey is bottom with Colby but verse with other boys. Here's a hot scene with Colby Micky and Eli Lincoln: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph5ff647fbc0e47 PS pretty certain the Knox's do not escort, I suspect they are making plenty of money and having too much fun with their filmed content 😉