I understand women taking more measures to ensure their safety. And I cooperate if their ad seems very legit and especially if they have a bunch of good ratings on ECCIE, TOB, or some of the other comparable review sites.
I’ll pay what I think are reasonable deposits up front. If they want a little token amount, just as a placeholder, to screen out flakes and non-serious inquiries, I understand. If I’m asking for an outcall and they’ll have to take a $35 Uber each way whether I show up or not, I understand wanting enough to cover that beforehand. If I book a BDSM domme who’ll need to rent a dungeon space, I understand that too.
However, if they want more for a deposit than a threshold that I think seems like a reasonable amount then, I assume they’re just going to rip me off and no-show with my deposit. It’s happened to me before (with a female provider).
When I book, I usually do roughly describe myself: Late fifties, medium height, medium build, I work a white collar job. I mention the fact that I’m multi-racial to give anyone that’d be an issue for a chance to back out before we meet (because I’d rather not meet them either).
With guys, I’ll happily answer if I’m a top, vers, side, or bottom. And happily answer if they ask if there’s anything in particular that I want out of a session, but it’ll just be a short sentence or two. E.g., "I’m looking for a BFE experience with a lot of kissing and making out."