BillyMan

I think that the rules should be defined by the people involved. It's not that there's some ordinances or actual regulatory agency to enforce them.
My husband and I do not just isolate our rules and boundaries to relationships with others or sex outside our marriage. Our approach is more holistic. Only one rule: be responsible and act responsibly in every aspect of your life. That means, we both have to trust that we are going to make responsible decisions about everything, ourselves as individuals, our lives, our relationship, our finances, our personal safety, eveything. I approach all my decisions from having a sense of responsibility towards me as an individual, me as a member of my family, as a professional, as a friend, as a citizen, and as a lover, so I'm not going to do anything that will place myself or my loved ones in harms way, or will hurt them.
We've been together for 21 years and so far, I've never needed to discussed any of his flings or who he gets involved with. Neither of us are interested in bringing another person to our relationship in a romantic way, and he hates threesomes (don't know why), so we have our things outside of our marriage. Sometimes we share about it, sometimes we don't. I just trust he's an adult who will know how to handle situations and people as they appear.
Polyamory is supposed to involve formal relationships, that is, involving decisions about living situation, fiances and emotional support. That's how I understand polyamory. However, I just live and let live, so if people consider themselves polyamory outside of those parameters, I'm nobody to judge (unless they want me or my husband involved).

It’s such a complex topic. I believe polyamory implies that feeling love for more than one person is a person’s relationship preference. There may or may not be a primary partner (multiple partners might have equal emotional standing). Open relationships are much simpler to define: non-monogamous (usually sexually). And there’s always a primary partner and a secondary.
I have a lot of experience in this area and can say that the key for my success is a feeling of security and trust with my husband. 
Unfortunately, that feeling comes naturally (for us) and is quite hard to develop, in my opinion. 
Know your boundaries. Express them in a non-confrontational way BEFORE big issues occur. And by all means, let everyone give love, as much as they want, to whomever they want, as long as it doesn’t violate your boundaries. 
Personally I’ve dated and fallen in love outside of my marriage. My husband never felt threatened because he knew I never stopped thinking of him as #1. It CAN be done, and done well. 

A very good question. One which I can answer in this way:
The typical "open" relationship means that SEX with other people is ok.
"Polyamorous" relationships means RELATIONSHIPS with other people is ok.
In my own marriage, we are "open" sexually. But have agreed that "dating" other people over steps a boundary.
That said....I can tell you from experience that the boundary can be a tipping point in a marriage. As a man who is attracted to men, I have fucked my brains out with other men but rarely have had romantic connections with one. However my wife, who lived as a lesbian for several years before we married, is more inclined to meet up with emotional support partners rather than go on sexual hook ups like I do.  Her outside companionship (to me) does feel like she over steps my comfort zone.  So THAT needs a LOT of emotional reassurances at home to make me feel "secure".  You might think it's the wife who is going to be getting jealous first. But all I'm doing is getting my dick wet. And she knows that. She has regular friends who she sees and has a deeper intimate relationship with them. I can only TRUST her when she says that she enjoys the company and the intimacy but that these women would never provide her with the security and comfort of her own marriage, so she doesn't view this as "dating" and these trysts come and go for a few weeks or a month but never long term.  There is a lot of TRUST issues in polyamory.
I am the one who's more inclined to get jealous, because SHE is the one who's riding closer to that line.
She was a lot easier to understand when we both just went to swingers clubs and fucked everything that moved 🥳

An open relationship, which I think is not uncommon among older gay males who have been together for a long time, can occasionally morph into a polyamorous relationship, in which one or both partners become emotionally involved with another man (this is not the same as having a favorite escort or fuck buddy). It is a very tricky situation, because few people are adept at managing two romantic attachments, or at accepting that one is sharing a romantic partner with another person. To begin with, all three--or four--of you need to be honest with one another, and come to an agreement that everyone understands and accepts the situation, or it can't last. That is no different than the original agreement that the partnership was open to other sexual relationships, but the justifications for it have to be different.  I mentioned in the old thread that my relationship with my partner came close to foundering on emotional attachments that each of us made to someone else, but they always occurred when we were not living together--in fact, in each situation we were living temporarily in separate countries. Neither of us was able to accept the multiple relationships continuing permanently, so they ended when we returned to living together. I was acquainted with only one couple who were able to successfully deal with one of them being in an emotional partnership with two men, and I really don't know how they managed it; the original couple actually worked together, and I think they were forced to come to an agreement in order to continue working together effectively.

I thought "Good Grief" was sweet but unsatisfying.  The writer could have used more feedback on the script.
Although it was somewhat clear what Dan Levy's character's issues were, that was not the case of his two friends.   
And while we saw a bit of how Levy's character, Marc, resolved his issues, we did not see how his two friends struggled with theirs and grew.  They just showed up at the end as better off.
(Also not happy that Marc's man in Paris, Theo, seemed to have been discarded.)
 
 

Tonight, in a theater, saw and very much didn't like, Good Grief.  I don't like the actors.
I know that the two main actors are beloved, so I'm probably wrong.  Hope you like it.
Trailer:
 
Movie:
Watch Good Grief | Netflix Official Site
WWW.NETFLIX.COM An artist grieving the loss of his famous writer husband takes his two best friends on a trip to Paris, where they unpack messy secrets and hard truths.  

Introverts can be assholes too.
Like this guy
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I would consider myself an introvert, if not shy. I prefer small groups over large groups which makes it difficult in some gay settings. On the other hand, in straight environments, I am completely more comfortable and engaging. If I’m with gay friends in a gay environment, I am much more comfortable.  I think this started at a young age when I felt some gays were either too over the top, or intimidating by their looks/physique. I’m sure I missed a lot of opportunities being an introvert as I look back. But I have also been able to observe people and find some solid quality friends. I don’t think this answered any of your questions…it has allowed me to reflect if I would have done anything differently. 

Ranges from walking away and never looking back to the place, to push my boundaries, to not being a big deal approaching a person and talking to him. Many times when I don't feel safe or comfortable in a place it's been because it's not the right environment for me, not because of something I am or do. Introversion is only one of the many factors that will make me shy away from connecting with others.
Furthermore, the more electronic device oriented a person is, the less social skills they develop. I am in charge of only my 50 percent of any interaction with another person.
Yes, I certainly don't flirt with prospective friends. Besides, I have come to realize that sometimes if I find myself thinking "strategy" to something that's supposed to be exciting and enjoyable, maybe I'm pushing myself to something I am not sure I will enjoy anyway.
My experience in group settings, including sex parties and places for hooking up, is that they have "moods". I've been to the same place for hookups in different occasions, and the experiences have been different because there seems to be a "mood". For example, one day the place feels like people are incurring in activites that I find beneath me (although I don't judge, I know well what does it and doesn't do it for me), and a different day I feel like the place is my home. So in that respect, sometimes even when the intentiions are obvious, there are no guarantees that there will be people that I could connect well. However, when a place has a specific purpose (i.e., a sex party), We definitely don't need to wonder if people go there for sex (altough there might be people who might tell you otherwise), so that will make certain premises easy to understand.
What you should not do is:
Rely on something like alcohol or drugs to "losen you up" Make up stories or excuses The opposite to #2, it's a social setting, not a confessional Take rejection as something that you did or are Assholes and predators are everywhere, so always count on finding at last one and don't take it on you Ignore your insctincs Present yourself as someone you are not Think that the night is ruined because of a rejection Also, I hear a lot of people who use introversion in a discriminatory manner. Keep in mind that we introverts are as humand and deserving of consideration and respect as everybody else.
I hope this helps.

My experience is limited, but I think massage places in the Philippines are not at the same level of class and cleanliness as those in Thailand, Taiwan, etc.
That said, this gentleman makes lots of Youtube videos in which he visits different spas in the Philippines and receives different kinds of treatments, including very sensual massages.  He's enjoying the royal treatment each time.
https://www.youtube.com/@MARKALVEETVMasaheKing

I had a good time last night, I found the tip about using the timer on my phone for lap dances was a great tool. I spent plenty but not more than I had planned. I brought a guy to the champaign room and we got interrupted halfway through because the person running the rooms thought my time was up, fortunately she realized her mistake and let us finish out the rest of the time in the room. I was a little disappointed some of the guys from the email didn't show, but there were other guys who weren't in the email there and they were sexy. I liked chatting with the guys and the other guests. As the night went on, even the popular guys weren't fully busy. There was time to spend with every guy I liked.

The room is in the back, where any number of dancers are entertaining clients.  Not a private room.
$20 per song, although I suggest you use the timer on your smartphone and have the dancer agree to $20 every four minutes.  Otherwise, if you start mid-song, or have a short song, you might not get your money's worth.

In my limited experience, once it got busy, it was hard to get the attention of specific performers.  The guys seemed a little more generous with their time and attention before it got really crowded.

Thank you, Obi-wan!

I attended Adonis at Evolve the first time this past Wednesday.  Dancer Jimmy told me about the nude parties, introduced me to Tim, and now I'm on the email list. 
I don't want to embarrass myself at the event.  Could some of you gentlemen please message and tell me what to expect?  I know about the cover charge.  Should I bring tip money?  Singles or twenties?  
Pardon my naivete, and thank you for the information.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

Enjoyed my 75-minute massage with Shane.  His strokes were not rushed but very intentional and varied.  He is well-trained and skilled.
Pressure was moderately strong as requested.  When he applied oil, it was not excessive; I was not super-greasy afterwards.  Lots of stretching was included.  
Conversation was polite and pleasant ... not too much at all.  All in all, a great experience.  One of my most satisfying.  Will repeat.

You can search this site using the numbers at the end of the URL.
Of those listed, I highly recommend 1881 (Billy).  PM if you want more details.

You can search this site using the numbers at the end of the URL.
Of those listed, I highly recommend 1881 (Billy).  PM if you want more details.

I have to second that nomination.  Stelly is very friendly and skilled.  Great mix of therapeutic and relaxing/sensuous.
https://www.masseurfinder.com/massage-therapists/20502/