DMonDude

Kinda just sounds like the kinda thing where during the time you were out of contact with him maybe he just picked up new "skills"/routine/methods for doing this to remain competitive, and now it's just part of the normal experience he offers. I think if you want to add new stuff/try new things, you probably should be able to just ask and he'll either say "totally yeah" or "oh that's not something i'm comfortable with" and it'll be all good.

Do everything you've already done again but add a second provider for all of it 👀

Rent.Men does as well. RentMasseur doesn't though from what i can tell.

Maybe you could do a thing where you take the provider to the trip, agree on a certain amount of time he's hired to spend with you and your husband but then he has to go back home. I feel like he'd probably understand that you'd want some just you and your husband time on the trip. Or maybe it'd be a thing where he goes with you but then you only agree to hire him for 2 out of 4 nights or whatever and those other nights he gets his own hotel room that he can work out of since he wouldn't be on the clock with you those nights. Then he flies back to your home city with you guys? I'm solely a client, but I'm fairly close with some of the providers i hire and they tell me about what things are like from their perspective and in doing this i try to operate in a way that takes their perspective into my own. I also work in a field that has a few broad similarities to providing, so i can relate to some of the struggles from the business side of it. Can relate to both of these in a way. I hire most often in L.A. and we have a TON of guys here, but MANY of them all have a certain typical "L.A. Look" in my opinion (which is ok, just can be repetitive sometimes). So i sometimes find myself very interested in guys from other places who travel here. And i'm super lucky i'm in a town that has both a ton of guys but also still attracts a lot of traveling providers. So it's really best of both worlds. So i really can't complain, but every once in a while i see some of the guys in certain U.S. states that don't travel who are super hot and a few I've thought about flying them to L.A. Doing so is a bit out of my price range if doing it on short notice though, but i could maybe do it if i planned it in advance and thoughtfully put the funds for it aside over time.

I see a lot of RentMen providers in particular who's ads say passport ready and ready to travel to you (particularly referring to being flown out to a clients state or other country). Is this something a lot y'all are actually doing frequently? Flying a favorite provider out to you from cross country or taking them on international travel with you? Am i just too much of a peasant to comprehend this? What are the logistics of flying someone out and putting them up in a hotel? Do you give them the flight/hotel money so they can book it? Or do they have to give you all their personal info so you can book it for them? How does that work?

To any provider who's in demand, us clients are a dime a dozen to them too. And rejecting the your request to unlock doesn't hurt them literally at all. You'd have to pay them for them to care less.

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Poor guy... Yeah you definitely gotta help break him out of that. I definitely understand the rest. I've found myself intimidated by providers before just from the physicality difference and not want to cause conflict in their presence, but I'm ABSOLUTELY writing that negative review when i get home lol. Even if Karma on it's face of how it is supposed to work was real (sorry, not trying to start that debate without anyone lol). Leaving a negative review for someone that provided bad service to you is not something that would get you bad karma. The negative review is the bad karma that provider gets for giving poor service.

I didn't have this problem at Citizen M. I actually really love that hotel for local stay-cations. Though i know each one in each city is probably very different. But the one time i hired at my local Citizen M. The guy (the provider) walked in on his own, went past the front desk staff, and sat somewhere in the "living room"/lobby/work area right next to the elevators. I came down and got him and took him up to the room. Then about 2 hours later he left on his own. For him walking in and leaving, he probably just looked like someone coming to go to their room or visit a friend. No issues at all. I know Citizen M locks the lobby door after a certain time of night though and my meeting was before that time. So maybe it would have been different if i went down to the lobby at 11pm to go let the guy in, i don't know.

I almost met up with this guy months and months ago and it not working out was entirely on me. It was back in like the tail end of 2024 or very early 2025. I flaked and cancelled on him last second cause i was nervous and chickened out. This was back when i was so new to hiring that i thought "surely 50% of the guys on RentMen are undercover cops or an axe murderer... this can't be real...". He also didn't show face pics at the time and some of his pics seemed to be from a variety of time periods of his life (some very current and others maybe a couple years old, looked consistent body wise but since there were no face pics i was in the dark there). I was very apologetic and gave him the rest of his rate anyway since i wasted his time. People like me (me at the time, never flaked out like that since) are why some providers ask for deposits in the first place. Sorry 🫣🤣. He was very chill and understanding about it though (helps that i still paid his rate i'm sure lol). Up until then everything was going fine, we had good communication and seemed to be very on the same page and aligned about what i wanted to do and what he was looking to provide. It probably would have been fine, but yeah...

Since we're belaboring the topic. I think that's a bit silly personally. It's just not equivalent. That's not you being "cautious", that's you being entitled. You're choosing to insert "unfriendliness" to the action of them not unlocking their album where as them assuming people might be time wasters and acting accordingly till proven other wise is a defensive business decision for them because their time is their money and just by the nature of them doing this business via the internet means they deal with arguably more time wasters than people who will convert to an actual booking. That is not the case from the client perspective. You aren't owed the photo album unlock, and not getting the unlock costs you nothing. Anyone expecting or needing friendliness in the setup communication process of booking doesn't understand that we're doing business here, not making new besties. Plus, the assumption that declining your photo unlock request equates to being unfriendly is like saying someone who rejects your dating advance is unfriendly solely on the face of it being a rejection, and that is very incel-ish logic. It's not unfriendly, it simply is disinterest. You aren't owed interest, so them not giving it to you does not equate to unfriendliness.

That's so "oblivious 90s sitcom husband" of those guys lol

Opening my eyes to a whole other side of this i didn't know was there 🙏

Every now and then i come across a provider's profile on RentMen. Usually a "Straight" or bisexual labeled provider and some of them will say on their profile "open to straight couples" or "open to women as well". Are there actually any women hiring guys from RentMen? I kinda just assumed RentMen in particular was kinda male clients only and that whatever few women do hire, probably use a different site. Do you know any female friends who hire? Is this more prevalent than i thought it was?

That's a very weird thing for him to just ask you for out of the blue. That's sugar daddy/sugar baby type stuff, and that should be something that's talked about and agreed upon between you and him in advanced. At the very least. Definitely not overreacting, that's very weird of him to have done.

At the end of the day it's a largely illicit trade. It's not like i can ask them to verify the reviewer purchased the good like on Amazon 🤣

Yeah it's better overall than letting any free account say anything and letting people game the system in that way. But on the flip side it makes me wonder what RMs subscriber numbers are. I'd be curious to see the numbers for how many unpaid members are booking providers who can't leave reviews versus how many paid members can leave reviews, and then how many of them actually do leave reviews. The reviews we see on RM post paid member requirement are likely a super tiny fraction of the actual user base and actual amount of people hiring. Though i don't think there's really any way for RM to make that better unfortunately. I guess that's why we come to this forum.

Since you have to have a paid membership to leave a review, i think RM reviews are mostly useless now personally. A provider might see hundreds of clients who would speak highly of them but some of those providers have no reviews on RM because those clients aren't paid RM users. Some providers might have one client who has a bad time but that happens to be a client who is a paid member and thus would be more motivated to leave a bad review, making that provider seem worse than they actually may be. So unless it's a provider with dozens of good reviews, or dozens of bad reviews. Showing an actual track record of performance among multiple paid members. I personally think it's not a good enough data point to make any judgements on and i mostly ignore the ratings/amount of reviews unless it's a large amount of reviews. I get that having the paywall would help stop review botting/spamming, but it also makes for a much smaller user base that can leave legit reviews. There's no real good way to handle it. As far as wanting providers to reply to reviews... Kinda feels a little needy to me personally. You write the review for other people to make use of, not to flatter and get a "thanks" from the provider.

Maybe i'm crazy but i much prefer the .men site from just a design perspective. The .eu site is too much like it's straight out of 2001 internet for me personally.

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Like @ThirdEye said. Posting those pics/videos for free doesn't make sense for everyone. Especially in a world where OnlyFans/selling content exists. Honey that's free for everyone to taste means a lot of those people are going to take their free taste and keep moving and never buy the jar cause they can just get full on everyone's freebies. And yeah sending photos or doing video call verification while/after agreeing on booking details is already what a lot of these guys are doing rather than unlocking their pics for anyone that asks.

I think it's largely about them just being upfront about the fact that the sheer volume of unlock requests they get is one they will no longer be dealing with and that they have to have some sense of feeling like you are actually going to book for them to bother to take the time to unlock. This doesn't automatically mean a 100% success rate at ruling out all potential scammers, pic collectors, and time wasters, but that's still better than them sitting there clicking yes to all 100 a day unlock requests they get when realistically like 10% of those might turn into a conversation and even less than that will turn into a booking. I've also seen some clients get pissy and send mean messages to providers who don't unlock in a timely manner too so i think the message is mainly to those people to get those people in particular to not even bother to engage. A lot of stuff like this made sense to me after i saw the DMs of a provider friend. Lot of clients are entitled assholes, to be perfectly honest.

I promise you none of those providers care. This isn't some hill of nobility you're dying on.

They have the right to charge whatever they want because there are people happily paying those prices (and higher), and you have the right to book someone who charges less because there are plenty of people charging less. Some providers are simply out of our price range and in someone else's and that's ok. Someone else sees the value you don't. So i really wouldn't let yourself get that "ooo i'm too good for this price" feeling and wanting a bunch of us here to co-sign that lol. That's the start and end of what i think about it personally. There is no "reasonable" price for any of this, it's not a legal market (in most places) and we aren't owed this hobby being cheap/affordable (there are plenty of affordable options though, you might just have expensive tastes your wallet can't keep up with, which is relatable).

Sorry to hear that, that's really unfortunate. Yeah i've definitely seen some guys who are terribly flaky/hard to book but if you happen to catch them at the right time and can meet it's great. But man are they making an awful impression on all the guys it doesn't work out with and missing out on a lot of business because most guys (rightfully) are not that patient.