JayCeeKy

Interesting question, one that's actually crossed my mind in the past. I asked my friendly neighborhood ChatGPT the question:   What do gay men consider "losing their virginity?" There isn't a single definition. Among gay men, just as among heterosexual people, "losing your virginity" is often a personal, cultural, or social concept rather than a medical one.
Some common ways people define it are:
First experience of anal sex (either as the insertive/"top" or receptive/"bottom" partner). This is probably the most common traditional definition among gay men. First mutually consensual sexual experience with another man, regardless of the specific act. Some people consider oral sex, mutual masturbation, or other intimate sexual activities to be the point at which they are no longer virgins. First emotionally meaningful sexual encounter. Some people don't count a casual hookup but do count their first sexual experience within a relationship. Not a useful concept at all. Many LGBTQ+ people reject the idea of virginity because it was historically defined around heterosexual vaginal intercourse. Instead, they simply talk about their "first sexual experience" or "first time having anal sex," "first time giving oral sex," and so on. Why there's no universal definition
The traditional concept of virginity was built around penile-vaginal intercourse. That framework doesn't translate neatly to same-sex relationships, so many gay men define it in ways that reflect their own experiences rather than a cultural rule.

I met with SmoothAdonis last night in ATL and WOW! One of the sexiest bods I've ever encountered. Plus, super cool personality - friendly, intelligent, and NOT a clock watcher.  And when it comes time for action, he' a tiger. An absolute "10." He wants a token deposit because he said he wasn't going to drive into Midtown from the suburbs and then be ghosted - but he did show, and on time. And yes, it's a true 9 incher. Atlanta has more than its share of super hot Black studs, but this one's at the top of my list. (Photo taken by yours truly.)
https://rentmen.eu/SmoothAdonis
 

I met with SmoothAdonis last night in ATL and WOW! One of the sexiest bods I've ever encountered. Plus, super cool personality - friendly, intelligent, and NOT a clock watcher.  And when it comes time for action, he' a tiger. An absolute "10." He wants a token deposit because he said he wasn't going to drive into Midtown from the suburbs and then be ghosted - but he did show, and on time. And yes, it's a true 9 incher. Atlanta has more than its share of super hot Black studs, but this one's at the top of my list. (Photo taken by yours truly.)
https://rentmen.eu/SmoothAdonis
 

I met with SmoothAdonis last night in ATL and WOW! One of the sexiest bods I've ever encountered. Plus, super cool personality - friendly, intelligent, and NOT a clock watcher.  And when it comes time for action, he' a tiger. An absolute "10." He wants a token deposit because he said he wasn't going to drive into Midtown from the suburbs and then be ghosted - but he did show, and on time. And yes, it's a true 9 incher. Atlanta has more than its share of super hot Black studs, but this one's at the top of my list. (Photo taken by yours truly.)
https://rentmen.eu/SmoothAdonis
 

I met with SmoothAdonis last night in ATL and WOW! One of the sexiest bods I've ever encountered. Plus, super cool personality - friendly, intelligent, and NOT a clock watcher.  And when it comes time for action, he' a tiger. An absolute "10." He wants a token deposit because he said he wasn't going to drive into Midtown from the suburbs and then be ghosted - but he did show, and on time. And yes, it's a true 9 incher. Atlanta has more than its share of super hot Black studs, but this one's at the top of my list. (Photo taken by yours truly.)
https://rentmen.eu/SmoothAdonis
 

I met with SmoothAdonis last night in ATL and WOW! One of the sexiest bods I've ever encountered. Plus, super cool personality - friendly, intelligent, and NOT a clock watcher.  And when it comes time for action, he' a tiger. An absolute "10." He wants a token deposit because he said he wasn't going to drive into Midtown from the suburbs and then be ghosted - but he did show, and on time. And yes, it's a true 9 incher. Atlanta has more than its share of super hot Black studs, but this one's at the top of my list. (Photo taken by yours truly.)
https://rentmen.eu/SmoothAdonis
 

I would agree with those who say there is no specific physical action comparable to heterosexual "loss of virginity," which usually is defined as vaginal penetration. Most gay men would think of their first consensual physical interaction with another male that involved the penis--whether it be sucking, getting sucked, fucking or getting fucked--as loss of virginity, but others would think that even passionate kissing would count. Loss of virginity for gay men has more to do with the reason for the physical interaction than the physical specifics. Some would even include mutual masturbation if it is motivated by sexual attraction to the other male.

Interesting question, one that's actually crossed my mind in the past. I asked my friendly neighborhood ChatGPT the question:   What do gay men consider "losing their virginity?" There isn't a single definition. Among gay men, just as among heterosexual people, "losing your virginity" is often a personal, cultural, or social concept rather than a medical one.
Some common ways people define it are:
First experience of anal sex (either as the insertive/"top" or receptive/"bottom" partner). This is probably the most common traditional definition among gay men. First mutually consensual sexual experience with another man, regardless of the specific act. Some people consider oral sex, mutual masturbation, or other intimate sexual activities to be the point at which they are no longer virgins. First emotionally meaningful sexual encounter. Some people don't count a casual hookup but do count their first sexual experience within a relationship. Not a useful concept at all. Many LGBTQ+ people reject the idea of virginity because it was historically defined around heterosexual vaginal intercourse. Instead, they simply talk about their "first sexual experience" or "first time having anal sex," "first time giving oral sex," and so on. Why there's no universal definition
The traditional concept of virginity was built around penile-vaginal intercourse. That framework doesn't translate neatly to same-sex relationships, so many gay men define it in ways that reflect their own experiences rather than a cultural rule.

Interesting question, one that's actually crossed my mind in the past. I asked my friendly neighborhood ChatGPT the question:   What do gay men consider "losing their virginity?" There isn't a single definition. Among gay men, just as among heterosexual people, "losing your virginity" is often a personal, cultural, or social concept rather than a medical one.
Some common ways people define it are:
First experience of anal sex (either as the insertive/"top" or receptive/"bottom" partner). This is probably the most common traditional definition among gay men. First mutually consensual sexual experience with another man, regardless of the specific act. Some people consider oral sex, mutual masturbation, or other intimate sexual activities to be the point at which they are no longer virgins. First emotionally meaningful sexual encounter. Some people don't count a casual hookup but do count their first sexual experience within a relationship. Not a useful concept at all. Many LGBTQ+ people reject the idea of virginity because it was historically defined around heterosexual vaginal intercourse. Instead, they simply talk about their "first sexual experience" or "first time having anal sex," "first time giving oral sex," and so on. Why there's no universal definition
The traditional concept of virginity was built around penile-vaginal intercourse. That framework doesn't translate neatly to same-sex relationships, so many gay men define it in ways that reflect their own experiences rather than a cultural rule.

Anybody wearing a mask in his Profile. I've learned the hard way that anonymity is not the only reason some wear masks. Masks don't preclude a hire, but it makes me very cautious. 

Interesting question, one that's actually crossed my mind in the past. I asked my friendly neighborhood ChatGPT the question:   What do gay men consider "losing their virginity?" There isn't a single definition. Among gay men, just as among heterosexual people, "losing your virginity" is often a personal, cultural, or social concept rather than a medical one.
Some common ways people define it are:
First experience of anal sex (either as the insertive/"top" or receptive/"bottom" partner). This is probably the most common traditional definition among gay men. First mutually consensual sexual experience with another man, regardless of the specific act. Some people consider oral sex, mutual masturbation, or other intimate sexual activities to be the point at which they are no longer virgins. First emotionally meaningful sexual encounter. Some people don't count a casual hookup but do count their first sexual experience within a relationship. Not a useful concept at all. Many LGBTQ+ people reject the idea of virginity because it was historically defined around heterosexual vaginal intercourse. Instead, they simply talk about their "first sexual experience" or "first time having anal sex," "first time giving oral sex," and so on. Why there's no universal definition
The traditional concept of virginity was built around penile-vaginal intercourse. That framework doesn't translate neatly to same-sex relationships, so many gay men define it in ways that reflect their own experiences rather than a cultural rule.

Interesting question, one that's actually crossed my mind in the past. I asked my friendly neighborhood ChatGPT the question:   What do gay men consider "losing their virginity?" There isn't a single definition. Among gay men, just as among heterosexual people, "losing your virginity" is often a personal, cultural, or social concept rather than a medical one.
Some common ways people define it are:
First experience of anal sex (either as the insertive/"top" or receptive/"bottom" partner). This is probably the most common traditional definition among gay men. First mutually consensual sexual experience with another man, regardless of the specific act. Some people consider oral sex, mutual masturbation, or other intimate sexual activities to be the point at which they are no longer virgins. First emotionally meaningful sexual encounter. Some people don't count a casual hookup but do count their first sexual experience within a relationship. Not a useful concept at all. Many LGBTQ+ people reject the idea of virginity because it was historically defined around heterosexual vaginal intercourse. Instead, they simply talk about their "first sexual experience" or "first time having anal sex," "first time giving oral sex," and so on. Why there's no universal definition
The traditional concept of virginity was built around penile-vaginal intercourse. That framework doesn't translate neatly to same-sex relationships, so many gay men define it in ways that reflect their own experiences rather than a cultural rule.

Several of our fellow members in our "Company" have privately followed up with me about Cam, expressing curiosity not only about his physical presence but also about what he brings to an experience. It is easy to understand the interest. Cam possesses a striking, hairless physique - smooth from head to toe - with proportions that evoke the idealized forms of Michelangelo's sculptures. At our first and, so far only, meeting, I gave him a skimpy gold thong to pose in, and the image of that moment has remained vividly with me ever since.
I've only shared one session with him, so I can't claim to know the full extent of his repertoire. However, afterward he mentioned that our next meeting would involve a wrestling session, which certainly piqued my curiosity.
Although Cam is on the shorter side, he defies expectations in more ways than one. His lips are, without exaggeration, among the most striking and attractive I have ever seen on a man.
A final reflection: in writing this, I recognize that I may have reduced Cam too much to his physical appeal, and for that I apologize. While his appearance is undeniably extraordinary, it is only one aspect of who he is. Cam is an intelligent, thoughtful, and multifaceted young man whose beauty extends well beyond the merely physical.

Thanks to @ErikEriksson, @nomad et al. for their cogent remarks that clarify the issues and correct fabricated quotes. 
I made my original post to call attention to what I viewed as an openly hateful remark by a new provider who apparently believes that using the anti-gay slur beginning with "f" is acceptable. What never occurred to me was that some people here would ignore or minimize the provider's offensive language almost entirely and instead focus on my passing comment that his rates were beyond my budget and what I typically spend.
I was even called a "jerk" simply because I had the audacity to suggest that I might be interested if there were room for negotiation at a lower price point. Apparently, even raising the possibility of negotiating a price is, to some, an unforgivable sin.
Now I read a member's comment with the equally absurd claim that there is some sort of unwritten - but supposedly universally accepted - rule prohibiting discussion or negotiation of rates. If that's true, used car salesmen everywhere must be envious of an industry where asking whether a price is negotiable is treated as a moral failing.
Gratefully, after being portrayed as a time-wasting, lowballing jerk, I received a private (and consoling) message from another member encouraging me to ignore the bullying and assuring me that I had done nothing wrong. I appreciate that sort of kindness and support, but it's difficult to ignore the fact that the conversation has been diverted away from what should have been the real issue: an openly derogatory slur directed at our still-targeted community.  Instead of condemning that behavior, some have chosen to criticize an entirely innocuous comment about my budget. To me, that shift in priorities is far more troubling than anything I wrote.

Thanks to @ErikEriksson, @nomad et al. for their cogent remarks that clarify the issues and correct fabricated quotes. 
I made my original post to call attention to what I viewed as an openly hateful remark by a new provider who apparently believes that using the anti-gay slur beginning with "f" is acceptable. What never occurred to me was that some people here would ignore or minimize the provider's offensive language almost entirely and instead focus on my passing comment that his rates were beyond my budget and what I typically spend.
I was even called a "jerk" simply because I had the audacity to suggest that I might be interested if there were room for negotiation at a lower price point. Apparently, even raising the possibility of negotiating a price is, to some, an unforgivable sin.
Now I read a member's comment with the equally absurd claim that there is some sort of unwritten - but supposedly universally accepted - rule prohibiting discussion or negotiation of rates. If that's true, used car salesmen everywhere must be envious of an industry where asking whether a price is negotiable is treated as a moral failing.
Gratefully, after being portrayed as a time-wasting, lowballing jerk, I received a private (and consoling) message from another member encouraging me to ignore the bullying and assuring me that I had done nothing wrong. I appreciate that sort of kindness and support, but it's difficult to ignore the fact that the conversation has been diverted away from what should have been the real issue: an openly derogatory slur directed at our still-targeted community.  Instead of condemning that behavior, some have chosen to criticize an entirely innocuous comment about my budget. To me, that shift in priorities is far more troubling than anything I wrote.

I appreciate the feedback regarding my brief exchange with this provider, but I would point out that simply replying with “Thanks… but I’ll pass for now” offers him no meaningful feedback as to why I chose not to hire him. I mentioned the $300 figure because that is, in fact, generally what I offer for this type of service.
Constructive feedback is especially important for someone like this gentleman, who I suspect may be relatively new to the business (both of his reviews are less than two months old) and may have unrealistic expectations about what most clients  -- at least in my experience — are actually willing to pay for the requested service, which typically is not in the $600–700+ range he appears to expect.
That said, the pricing issue is secondary. The primary reason I chose to share information about this particular provider was to alert our “company of men” to what appears to be his clear disdain for gay men, as evidenced by his repeated use (twice) of a term I consider highly demeaning -- made all the more concerning given the context in which he chose to use it in responding to me.

Thanks to @ErikEriksson, @nomad et al. for their cogent remarks that clarify the issues and correct fabricated quotes. 
I made my original post to call attention to what I viewed as an openly hateful remark by a new provider who apparently believes that using the anti-gay slur beginning with "f" is acceptable. What never occurred to me was that some people here would ignore or minimize the provider's offensive language almost entirely and instead focus on my passing comment that his rates were beyond my budget and what I typically spend.
I was even called a "jerk" simply because I had the audacity to suggest that I might be interested if there were room for negotiation at a lower price point. Apparently, even raising the possibility of negotiating a price is, to some, an unforgivable sin.
Now I read a member's comment with the equally absurd claim that there is some sort of unwritten - but supposedly universally accepted - rule prohibiting discussion or negotiation of rates. If that's true, used car salesmen everywhere must be envious of an industry where asking whether a price is negotiable is treated as a moral failing.
Gratefully, after being portrayed as a time-wasting, lowballing jerk, I received a private (and consoling) message from another member encouraging me to ignore the bullying and assuring me that I had done nothing wrong. I appreciate that sort of kindness and support, but it's difficult to ignore the fact that the conversation has been diverted away from what should have been the real issue: an openly derogatory slur directed at our still-targeted community.  Instead of condemning that behavior, some have chosen to criticize an entirely innocuous comment about my budget. To me, that shift in priorities is far more troubling than anything I wrote.

It's partially because he wouldn't have lashed out that way had you not "suggested" a lower rate in a business transaction where bartering/negotiating is not the norm and is actively frowned upon by most people on both ends of the transaction in this hobby (particularly for new first time clients). That's the part you aren't understanding, you didn't just say hello and he bit your head off for nothing. You don't realize you effectively insulted him first. Obviously, his reaction was way over the top and tells a lot about him, but "merely suggesting" a lower rate is what caused him to initially escalate. What you're used to paying isn't an enforced standard, every provider can charge what they want and if it's a price they stick to, it's generally because they have people who are paying it and they generally aren't going to lower it (especially as drastically as you suggested) for a new first time client.
If you'd replied the same way to any other provider, most of them of course wouldn't have called you what he called you, but they'd have likely still been fairly annoyed or even mad at you, verbalized that in some less extreme way, and possibly still blocked you. If someone is charging a rate you can't afford or aren't willing to pay, you don't say "well other providers are charging less" or "well i don't think you're worth that much so you should only charge me X instead". That's effectively what you're saying to a provider when you bring up some lower price some other provider unrelated to them charges. It's an insulting suggestion to the provider and simply isn't how this works. All that's needed (if anything) at most is a "oh ok that doesn't work for me/my budget unfortunately" and move on to the next profile.
So with that knowledge/context, the issue is that you unknowingly poked a bear here by not knowing an unspoken courtesy of this hobby. That's why people are telling you about what you said more than they are criticizing the provider. The provider saying what he said sucks, literally no one here is denying or defending that. People suck and are going to say hateful shit. He's not on this thread to hear the criticism and he likely wouldn't change even if he was. Consoling you over that doesn't prevent you from unknowingly walking into this situation again with another provider, but telling you why this happened does.

I guess I'm not sure that is true or that a norm has been established.  It is true that many people simply say that is more than I can pay and terminate the discussion.  But there are people who actually actively negotiate and also people like OP who say that is beyond my budget, I usually pay x amount.  In many instances, the provider continues the conversation because they want the work, even if they are unhappy.  I don't think it is "insulting" to suggest a lower amount; discussion of pricing is a subject for negotiation for most services including this one.  But what I think is most troubling to OP, and I agree, is that the focus of this discussion seems to be blaming OP at least in part and attempting to "educate" him about the proper way to have the pricing discussion, instead of on the behavior of the provider.  [This is coming from someone who has not negotiated price except for one time when I said that is more than I expected, after which the provider tried to negotiate, which I did a bit until I realized the discussion made it too icky to move forward.]

I don't see how the OP was in any sort of error, and I'm surprised that there is so much discussion on if he was right or wrong in any way.  He simply stated that it was over budget, gave context of what he finds the usual market rate, and ended the interaction by thanking the escort for responding.  
These are business interactions.  It should be expected to establish a price for service.  One possible outcome of listing a price is that it will be too high for the person wanting the service.  Most business people would appreciate knowing why there service was declined.  Even if they are justified in their price or truly believe they are justified in their price, they should appreciate knowing that they were not hired because of the price.
The escort in this case is a racist and narcissist who has no business acumen.  
I have also told escorts that their rates were too high for me.  My responses in those situations have usually been similar to the OP in that I merely state that the price is higher than I am willing to pay, thank them for the response and wish them well.  I have never tried to negotiate a lower rate, but most of the time the escort has come back offering a lower rate.  I generally still would not hire them even if the lower rate was within the range of what I was willing to pay because I think there is a chance that the experience will not be good because the escort is not getting what he thinks he is worth even if it is ridiculous.  
I contacted one escort who was new to the profession about meeting for a 2-3 hour session.  Of course, the question of rate came up.  He quoted is rate as $750-1000/hour.  This young man obviously had no idea what he was doing, and in the subsequent communication, it became evident that I would have been his first client.  I gave him some friendly advice which included that a typical rate in that market was $200-300/hour.  I also told him what the expectations of his potential clients would be.  He came back and said he would do $200/h. I stuck to my typical approach at that point, and wished him luck but didn't ask to set an appointment.  
Three months later, I saw he was still on rentmen when I was looking through the profiles for his town which I was going to again for a business trip, so I messaged him just to ask him how things were going and how was business, as I was curious if my advise had any sort of effect.  He said business wasn't good, and inquired again if I would want to hire him and what all I would want to do.  I told him what my typical expectation was.  He said it all sounded good to him and that $200/h would be his rate for 2-3 h.  So, we had an agreement to meet at my hotel when I got into town.   On the night of the appointment, I messaged him when my plane took off, when it landed, and when I had the rental car and an ETA for arrival at the hotel.  He, in essence started from scratch again wanting to know my stats, what I wanted to do, etc.  He then wanted to know how long I would be in town, and if we could mee the next day.  He already knew I was just in town that night, working the next day, and flying out the next evening.  His approach of 'how long are you in town; let's meet tomorrow' when I already told him my schedule is unfortunately a common tactic with escorts.  So, in the end, it was all a waste of time.  At least he wasn't racist or insulting or didn't try to give me an 'education'.

The ONLY time I've ever paid upfront was last year in Atlanta. I got his number from his ad on "MegaPersonals" - my first mistake. I was actually surprised that the person in the photo showed up as he has also been in a few pretty hot porn vids (mostly him having his impressive schlong being milked in the cramped backseat of a Jeep). Anyway, he showed up at my hotel room, asked for the money, counted his loot, called me a "vintage" sobriquet for a gay person, and then left. As others have stated: NEVER PAY UPFRONT, NEVER SEND A DEPOSIT. I would also add: don't get your escort referrals from sleazy online sites like MegaPersonals. 

https://rentmen.eu/YngMotionXTrey
I probably should have said his $600-$700 fee was way over MY budget, but still, I  wasn't expecting this kind of response. He also Blocked me.

FWIW any one who advertises their services to the gay male community and calls us that particular slur - in ANY CIRCUMSTANCE - should be known for their own words.
I’m surprised and disappointed with anyone defending this behavior.

He called me a "goofy f@g" when I needed to reschedule. What a charming guy.

I checked into a NYC hotel last week and at the same check-in  counter was a drop-dead-gorgeous man, tall, blond hair, great build. We got into the same elevator and discussed the rudeness of some New Yorkers. He said he was Swedish but now lives in Boston and that Bostoners can sometimes be rude, also. When I got to the room who is the first photo to come up on both Grindr AND Rentmen, our friend Mitch (I wonder if the "Den" means Denmark even though he said Sweden)? Yes, my friend from the elevator. I sent him several messages of a willingness to meet - but he never replied. He must be totally booked up or has enough demand to pick & choose whom he wishes to meet. Or, perhaps he didn't like doing business in the same hotel where he sleeps - who knows. Regardless, he seemed like a really nice guy, easy to talk to, and is absolutely beautiful. Luckily, I found several other super hot guys here in the Big Apple (with super fees, also, at least to someone from the boonies) so I'm not complaining. I admit that I had to stroll by some of the hallowed places in NYC of my younger years e.g. Stella's, Gaiety, etc. which brought back great memories but also a great sense of how quickly time flies.