Mocha

Off topic but I don't often have a lot of Indian clients, but had one recently and then another a few years back who was a regular regular. I'm quite surprised at their "endowments", and many I've met didn't mind being bottoms. I'm convinced India has the largest bananas in Asia. I just don't think they get proper "press" here in America, despite their large presence...though usually Indians are usually the hotel owners/doctors/convenience store owners versus other taboos.

If I were advertising on masseur finder, I'd be charging $300 too. Their advertising prices are...more than phone bill and insurance payment. I don't care if 1 or 2 clients pays for the ad. That's like an employer taking $200 out of someone's paycheck, but saying, "working 5 days a week will pay for itself though". That assumes nobody cancels, and if you charge $300, one cancellation is like a a whole day off work. That's why when the whole federal shutdown was going on, I was just like damn. They don't know how to handle it. I go thru this shit every fucking week. People cancel, flake, don't show, disappear and book two, three weeks later. Meantime I have bills AND advertisement fees.

I actually have a friend who’s moving up near ND area. I have scouted that area in the past, even though it’s that way up there...they just have a small population in their cities. Rentmen and a4a have little to no advertisements, and a previous trip there a few years back shown it to me “potential”, but because it’s so small and spread out, I have to make sure I’m set up before I go. Not a place to just go and expect a steady stream of clients, especially now that backpage and Craigslist are out. Those were the 2 main sites to get any biz from in that area I want to still wish Grindr/Scruff and such would freely allow postings of ads, to get better exposure in many of these small towns, but I just don’t think it would make fuck of a difference. I keep hearing these stories of “foe hoes” on Grindr. Random people who don’t advertise anywhere else, but will gladly try to sell something on Grindr to anyone, without discernment. Even if they did allow pro ads on Grindr, it’d probably be another Craigslist yard sell of an app, with rates of $50 to $100, with bareback included, for two hours. That type of stuff I don’t miss. Also with Scruff, I think that site is a bit of a complex. Craigslist was more interracial, Scruff seems to be a bit “exclusive”. Not to mention, you really have to sit on the app for awhile to really see results from it.

Once again, I think about mechanics...and how it seems people will happily fork over hundreds and thousands for metal and rubber, but will argue over a measly $100, $50, $25 difference for someone who’s selling their body, their temple, their souls. Don’t mechanics charge more to rotate bigger tires? Won’t it cost more to service a newer Mercedes than an older Buick? Don’t you pay more to fill up with 93 versus 87? Yes I understand: it’s not exactly the same concept, and all those have perfectly good reasons to be charged extra for (except the gas prices, premium never seems to be consistent), but still...so do we.

Interesting! Well I do need to make my rounds back to SF...perhaps in April will be good timing. Otherwise good points made. Is it important to “live” in a an area that has many studios? I know Orlando and Miami supposedly had some studios, but it seems to me the ones down there seemed to play up on the whole stereotypes that @LivingnLA mentioned. That said, @LivingnLA, the whole dom Blk/wht sub genre is actually still a “thing” right now, and I don’t think it’s as limited. If I were to guess, I would imagine it’s one of the top main fetishes out there (though, I don’t like to “call it” a fetish). In some markets, it sells better than others. For example, in Atlanta, it doesn’t work well there because anyone interested in the fantasy have more Options at their disposable, to where it’s overwhelming. But a place like Minneapolis...the fantasy is going to fly off the shelves. For example, just the other day there was a bi-married client who enjoyed watching straight porn while with a guy, because he wants to imagine being a woman.

I personally wouldn’t offer that voluntarily. The blue pill can have some side effects or interact with other things. Wouldn’t want to be responsible. Even the head cleaners I’ve gotten away from readily having on hand...Some people go beyond the limits.

That’s not a rant, sir. I’m just saying I have a different opinion/results regarding a4a. To me, especially considering men4rent and backpage are gone, a4a is still worthwhile having around.

I don’t know bruther, guess it varies. I still say clients on a4a are no lesser in quality than Rentmen. Rentmen doesn’t just have flakes, they have lots of scammers, spammers, and all sorts. That’s not Rentmen’s fault, but remember: atleast with adam4adam I can see the clients photo and age and stats. I usually never meet an adam4adam client who doesn’t show a pic. But Rentmen: I’ve had to start asking clients to introduce themselves. Just because I’m an escort, it’s not 1995 where I want to meet someone off the internet blindly with no clue of them. Yes, the replies on a4a can be stomach churning, and yes there’s some bad apples on a4a, and yes some are even to be avoided. But there’s no compromising quality when meeting someone from a4a. My client yesterday: was from a4a. I pulled up right behind his Bimmer. The city I’m staying in is ultra-conservative. Rentmen is barely known, and I don’t get much biz from it in these type of areas. That’s when a4a helps. To me, the rapid decline of a4a has made it slightly better: most of the weirdos and nuisances have moved on to the apps, so now it’s a more refined site, with less fluff/spam/bored wankers that you get with Grindr and company.

Back when I used to go down there, I’ve stayed north loop in the general vicinity of GB international, there’s also locals out in those area. The 2 neighborhoods you mentioned are going to be the most popular. I haven’t been down that way in years so some neighborhoods may have changed. But that’s general assessment.

Less of a rant, more of just processing and examining the possibilities

And just after I posted this, I was invited to meet a client at a “swingers house”. It was like a bathhouse, for “all”. Just when I thought I’ve seen it all...nope. But it’s true, I suppose you can (and many do) choose both. Start at 1 or the other, and then go on to the next. The most popular is the guys who leave the gay bar at 2 am and then go to the other “club”. I’ve concluded that’s about the least productive time to go. I finally tried something toward the end of last year. Originally I was planning to go to the bath to “advertise”, because a couple of clients of mine told me they went. However, it seemed they were doing it for reasons not related to hiring. So I went during prime time, early in the evening to try it and “see what happens”, worst thing that could happen, I lose 11 bucks since I already had the 6 month membership. I found 1 prospective client, but I won’t mention how many guys I ended up bringing to my room/going to theirs. I was supposed to be networking, instead I fell into the temptation of getting laid. And though it may seem risky, there was no infectious diseases spread (even got tested last month). So, baths can be safe, I personally have never contracted anything from them...then again there’s no guarantee but have to play safe and don’t get down with anybody I can’t see in the light lol. However: after that I had no desire to return to the baths. I generally only go to 1 about once every 1 to 2 YEARS, maybe a couple times in a year. Reason being, I just feel some of those guys don’t know what they want. It’s like a buffet. And the whole anonymous sex/let’s get to biz ASAP thing kind of takes something out of it. I suppose I like the bars because I like the challenge. Bath houses are too easy, but the sex seems watered down. The guys seem preoccupied with trying the whole buffet, the encounters at bathhouses seem to last like 5 to 10 minutes. I usually end up leaving feeling icky. I prefer to go to places where sex is the possibility rather than priority.

Thankyou for the assessment and the extra perception. It certainly adds to the overall consideration. I just want to be clear, and maybe I did make it come across this way in the title, but I’m not “bored” with escorting in itself. S work is a sexy, interesting, fulfilling career and sometimes I forget how grateful and blessed I am to have come this far and have steady demand. I appreciate everyone I’ve met. Over the weekend I had a client invite me out to a swingers club and me and another guy put on quite the “show”, and over the weekend a client I’ve known for 5 years happened to be visiting the same city. To be honest, I don’t know what I’m actually bored of. I guess what I’m referring to is beyond the reviews I get, I don’t feel “celebrated”. All those awards like hookies and the various porn awards honor porn stars, or escorts who do porn, but where’s the public acknowledgement for guys who just escort? Also, it’s the social aspect of things that are missing. These past couple months I’ve been traveling a lot. So I’ve been doing less social situations. Sure, escorting can provide lots of social and communication, but it’s all 1 on 1, concentrated to the time that they booked. Like I said, I may be more bored with my “situation” versus escorting in itself. I know when I went to Chicago the weekend before NYE, I stayed near boystown and I just felt so revived and alive. Same way when I go to DC and SF. I just feel zesty and alive. Problem is I end up not being able to stay in those cities too long as I’m not in a position to make a living situation out of those visits.

...perhaps I will write about it ? There was another recent one after the previous in fact.

Assuming we’re talking for social and not business: Also assuming “I don’t drink” is not a determining factor. Assuming one can go to a gay bar, and have fun/pick up without drinking. My go to has usually been gay bars/clubs for drinks, socializing and hookups. However, I know there’s a bit of a “chase” that can come about when going to bars. Not to mention, the risk of going “overboard” on drinks or the chance a DUI can be a nagging reason to just say fuck it, and stay in (just the other night I was pulled over by some b***h who asked if I was drinking, when I hadn’t even had a sip and just left the gym). In this little small town, I don’t even bother anyway. Too easy of a target. Bathhouses seem to cut thru that chase. I’ve also run into other providers who frequent or prefer bath houses over going to a gay bar. I also realize bathhouses aren’t offered in every city (those areas usually run parties from home). But when it comes down to it, I think the gay bars have a better quality of connection, whereas the bathhouse is a quicker guarantee of a connection...though one that usually doesn’t include exchanging numbers.

Hahaha...you know, I won’t lie and say I imagined it for 5 seconds, but then I couldn’t tell if it was his adopted son or biological son. Either way, that woulda just been weird to ask, but I did have to confirm he was over 18...I can’t be doing hokie pokie with underaged kids in the vicinity. Considering his partner (who I also happened to meet after the session) was not a “mom”, I couldn’t tell. I guess these are the things that one graduates to once they reach daddy status. Guess I’m old enough to “pass” in such situations.

That’s probably the MAIN reason. BUT, when I started out in Miami in 2007, I was offered a place to stay for my first month of college, $300, and “unlimited sex”. Hard to pass on. Later, I was liking the dinner dates, going to neighborhoods I could never afford, etc. Then it just became...a thing I enjoyed. True...but your current avatar would probably scare those ones off. Just like my last client lived 100 miles from town, on a dirt road, with chickens and cats everywhere. And the sign on the door said, “we’re all nuts here”. I was like, this is how they died on Texas Chainsaw massacre and Get Out. It was even more crazy when his 20 something year old son answered the door. All in all, it was fun...but initially scary.

Well see, that’s when it comes down to what the agreement is. Again with the cancellation fees and deposits. I would like to say in a perfect world people cancel for perfectly valid reasons, but that’s not always the case MOST of the time. And there’s a difference between cancelling for an emergency, and then cancelling last minute. For example, the market I’m currently in, these guys cancel 99% of the time. It’s always something comes up, or they can’t get away. So I basically stopped hosting unless they pay $50 upfront because the main no shows come from those who want me to host. Hosting in this particular area involves me going 40/50 miles into town, getting a hotel, and then staying overnight. I was thinking the other night, I have been pretty harsh on people flaking out and I should be more understanding. Especially in Denver, I had to drop 2 former regulars, cancel fees for 2 no show clients, and blacklisted maybe 4 or 5 if not more. Like...majority of the time it isn’t emergencies, it’s just people operating in their own selfish agenda. They think, “I don’t have to show up, someone else will.” One thing I’ve found people falling short, is them saying, “we never made an appointment”. So I find I have to continually use the word “appointment” and “schedule” and “confirming”.

Good Lord...I’d say let me deal with him, but I deal with enough of em. What address did he initially send you to? Was it his house? That’s just crazy. I’d certainly be gathering information and going to the next level.

That’s true, maybe the car breakdown was the proverbial Balaam’s donkey (though I take it lightly considering I understand cars have a mind of their own). But in this case, if a client gives a “tongue lashing” because of a car breakdown, you’d have to wonder what would have happened if something else didn’t go accordingly.

Interesting. I can see that with only fans. The thing that that got me about justfor.fans (are we talking the same site here?) is they mentioned something about a $50 minimum in order to cash anything out to you. I’m ??‍♂️ on this whole low pay for porn thing. Is this something recent? I always thought the Colt and Falcon type models and even the ones Chi Chi La Rue did had some figures attached to them. The “income” I’ve “heard” over time have ranged anywhere from guys getting $2,000 per shoot, to $50,000 for a “contract”, to on average $500 per shoot, etc. If in fact it’s not worth the pay, it goes back to what I was saying about advertising on Adam. There’s many providers who say they won’t advetise on a4a. Well to me, that’s just a supplement to my other work. Some guys supplement with onlyfans, others with porn, I use a4a and do massages. Thing with massages (namely a4a) is some of these rates they ask for. Some guys think just because it says “masseur”, they expect corporate spa prices. They don’t comprehend that I’m not seeing clients round the clock, and $90 when only 1 to 2 clients actually show up per week is not going to cut it. I been working on the social media thing, but it’s addicting lol. I’ve always been the type that I’ll strive to do 2-4 photo shoots a year, and that’s it. With social media it’s like having to consistently roll out new material. And with me, I’ve so many different things going on to where I’m not always inclined. I’m also trying to limit my “at home” time to no more than one to two weeks at a time, and travel the rest of the month. Lot of the boredom is arising out of those one to two weeks I’m not traveling, because the area I’m temporarily based in is s.a.d. weather and few clients.

Ironically, before I even came back to read the replies, I had begun signing up for an only fans account. I often see the tweets on Twitter referencing justfor.fans. I'll give it a shot. Like I said, for the most part I've stayed "relevant" because I'm regularly traveling and doing photo shoots and I also post my own selfie clips on Twitter, and Rentmen of course. My thing is, I don't readily have the equipment or 3rd party person to shoot higher quality porn videos, so there's only so much I can do myself. Some days, I question whether I'm doing enough. But what's enough? For the first 5 years of escorting, I had no doubt I was content. These last 4 or 5 years, I'm still content, but the doubts are there. Everything from unsupportive friends, to former clients admitting they're "jealous" of my prices (and subsequently asking if ill accept a lower rate), to client trying to get me to find a different job, quit, and be his. Add to that the occasional RIP or renegade of a few good clients...My entrepreneurial spirit has been thoroughly tested. Each time, I brush off, and get back into the spirit better than the last. That's not to sound like a "victim" (people love to throw that around). Rather more of desire to separate from unproductive situations, and accentuate what's already in progress. Perhaps porn could provide that. But, I've also run into unsupportive (even sabatoging) members of the sex industry as well, so even I do go into porn, I'm not expecting all peaches and cream either. Like I've said, people in this biz can be trippy, I don't know why. I've had a masseur in Dallas send me a message saying I'm not a masseur, but a prosititute, another massur in Kansas City recently tried to set me up (and I caught the BS on his 2nd message), other scenarios where I've reached out to providers and the interaction was seemingly unwelcome. All kinds. Where are the real people at? If I have to do porn to connect with some real people in the industry, I'm willing and able.

By bored, I don’t mean bored of the passionate encounters I have with clients...but more of just bored of the acknowledgement I feel can be under-received with being an escort. I’ve been working on staying consistent on social media, but I admire some of the guys who have their porn name/company boosting their ratings and getting thousands of likes. Over the past few months, at the suggestion of a few clients that I should try out porn, I wonder if I’ve been doing enough. I have the reviews, I have the demand, but sometimes I feel like “they” don’t know who I am. And for many years, I wanted to maintain that low profile, of not being readily recognized when I went out with friends to bars. But now, I don’t really frequent gay social networks, and anyone I do cross is usually a hookup or friends who already know who I am. Not to mention, though I love traveling cities, unless I know friends there already, I’ve been feeling less zest than before. Considering I’ve been to most every city in the country more than twice, I usually find myself arriving, going to the store, then to the hotel and just crashing out with a take out. I don’t have the motivation to do touristy things/fancy restaurants (unless at the invite of a client) because I’m not there to share with anyone. Occasionally I’ll allow myself 1 or 2 freebie hookups each trip if I’ve reached my financial goals or not expecting anyone else to pop up. On the other hand, I just have many reservations about porn...Part of me sees there’s so many people doing it. How do I know if I’ll get what I’m wanting out of it? For every hot gay porn star to follow, there’s a dozen more doing the same thing. Then there’s the exposure, and the lifelong commitment to being “out there”. I may also sound like a hypocritical conservative by saying this, but part of me does feel excessive watching of porn has contributed to certain problems in the gay community: more requests for barebacking, more men with sexual/porn addictions, and an overall commercializing of sex in general. I feel more and more people are being influenced by what they see on xTube. Then I wonder about the pay. I’ve spoke to a producer who named some names and dropped how much their pay was. Whether that was “per shoot” or part of a lump sum contractual payment, I didn’t clarify. But, some of the figures given, I have made that same amount in the privacy of some generous clients. That thread I made about low rates was more of a general theme, but there’s clients who don’t mind dropping 400, 500, 600 for a couple (easy) hours of my time. BUT...if I’m doing porn for exposure and/or the entertainment value, the level of pay may not be as important. For those reasons, though I’ve been a provider for over 10 years, doing porn was not a priority of mine. But for the reasons expressed, I feel I’m at a point where I’m ready for new endeavors. Is there anyone has thought about doing/or not doing porn, but changed their mind? I know this is similar to a post @VictorPowers made awhile back, however I understand each person’s circumstance may differ.

But why would you be forced to work with those strung out types? Its easy to walk away from those types.

Not quite. I am a mechanic myself (when I’m not answering calls and having sex). I do most of the maintenance on my two cars with the exception of stuff that requires more than 1 person. It’s not so much that they are rat bastards, it’s just the type of business it is. They know most people don’t know about cars, and the prices have no real legal regulation. It’s not food or healthcare (even though healthcare too is a scam, sadly) Finding a good, “cheap” mechanic is not easy, but even those aren’t always the best either because there’s been times I could have done the work better than they have. Simple stuff like oil changes, I have caught errors. I’ve had overfilled oil levels, under tightened oil filters, little stuff they did and missed and I had to go back behind them and re-do it. One mechanic forgot to put my thermostat back in during a water pump change. Fortunately it was just a $10 fix. Overall, I don’t like auto repair shops, but I do like mechanics, for the fact that I’m not always inclined to work on my cars even though I am knowledgeable. Some mechanics can been like your best friend/lawyer. But even those...sometimes they think you’ve gotten too comfortable and think they can throw out any price and you’ll be willing to pay it. Best advice in life: know your car, know your health, study everything you can possibly know about DIY even if you don’t DIY, just so you’re not in the dark when someone else tells you they fixed something. ...and never upgrade to the same brand of tires you had on. That way if you had Hankooks and switched to Continentals, you’ll know you made a switch.

Anyone recall the thread I made couple years ago about why I said I don’t like auto repair shops?