JamesB

In my opinion, Scott Adams was not assigning moral guilt to every black individual. He was reacting to a reported polling result. Group level data is routinely used to inform behavior. People adjust where they live, travel, or work based on crime statistics, political hostility, or social trust, even though those statistics never describe every individual. Saying that is always illegitimate when race is involved creates a special exemption that does not exist anywhere else. It is inconsistent to say patterns can be discussed until the moment they become uncomfortable. “Judge individuals” is a good moral principle but it is not how humans navigate the world at scale. We constantly rely on generalizations to manage uncertainty. Calling that racism in every case collapses an important distinction between prejudice and pragmatic caution, even when the caution is poorly worded. The claim is not that all racial generalizations are equally bad, but that responding to open expressions of hostility by advising distance is not the same thing as advocating dominance or exclusion. You can say the advice was crude or counterproductive without pretending it is equivalent to historical racism. If it is 2026, we should be able to talk honestly about data, incentives, and social breakdowns without declaring that any uncomfortable inference is automatically bigotry.

Given how much information about this person is readily available online, I’d think it wouldn’t be very difficult to persuade him to do the right thing and return the money. Just saying.

I have a strong preference for clean shaved providers, though I’m also fine with a well groomed, trimmed beard. Long, bushy beards are a no go for me. That said, I would never ask a provider to shave his beard for me.

I have a very strict rule: No Deposits, No pre-pay. It has worked for me.

In my experience, it can go either way. With some providers, each session improves as you learn each other’s likes and dislikes and become more comfortable together. With others, familiarity can lead to complacency, and they stop putting in the effort to make each encounter better.

Listen to your brain!!

The only time I’ve ever had to cancel on the same day of the appointment was due to a bike accident. I offered to pay whatever he felt was fair, and even though it was only the second time I’d booked him, he told me not to worry about it. The next time we met, I paid him 1.5 times his rate. It sounds like you missed the chance to make things right at the time of the cancellation, and he’s clearly no longer interested in working with you. Take it as a learning experience, move on, and find someone else.

I have a regular who always starts the session fully draped, which I actually appreciate. At his place, the A/C vent is directly above the massage table, so being covered during the massage portion is much more comfortable. As the session transitions into the more intimate part, he gradually removes the draping, which I find quite sensual.

If you were paying him what he asked for, why would he be disappointed? If you were to pay a lower fee to another provider, will he then lower his fee? Tell him to grow up or find another client.

I’m sorry you went through that. It’s happened to most of us, so welcome to a club none of us really wanted to join. Try to treat it as a learning experience and move on. I’d also recommend searching this forum for threads on “red flags,” as they can be very helpful. And until you develop a solid vetting process of your own, you might want to stick with providers who are recommended here. Having a no deposit, no upfront payment rule is also a good guideline to follow.

This topic comes up every so often, so here’s my take. I don’t really share the gloomy view of the economy. In 2025, the U.S. economy showed solid resilience and growth, and for 2026 I’m expecting more moderate but still steady expansion. I’m sure this varies by market, and I understand that those living on only fixed incomes may see things differently. As for provider rates, I don’t see them declining overall, nor do I expect them to. Historically, that simply hasn’t been the case. What I have noticed is a wider range of rates than usual, and I don’t have a clear explanation for that. I’ve also started seeing more discounts, which at least in my local market is fairly typical at the start of the year and again during the summer. I’ve also observed an increase in the number of providers over the past six months, though in my area most of those are traveling providers. As things stand, this “drop in rates” feels more like wishful thinking than an actual trend. As always, this is just my opinion, and it’s worth exactly what you paid for it.

Agree 100%. The Currency Transaction Report (CTR) threshold is still $10,000 nationwide for banks and other financial institutions. What does exist are limited Geographic Targeting Orders (GTOs) issued by FinCEN, but those apply only to specific counties and ZIP codes in Arizona, California, and Texas, and only affect Money Services Businesses. The current order is temporary and remains in effect through March 6, 2026. Interestingly, there is now a debate in Congress about raising the threshold, not lowering it. The $10,000 limit was set in 1972 and has never been updated for inflation. A bipartisan bill proposed in late 2025, known as the STREAMLINE Act, would increase the CTR threshold from $10,000 to $30,000, index it to inflation every five years, and adjust certain SAR thresholds.

A quick spray before the session. Simple and effective.

I admire your patience.

Lately I’ve noticed rates are all over the place, especially with newer providers. Massages can range anywhere from $160 to $350, and escort services from about $250 to $500. @Braziliancutee In my experience, appearance only gets someone so far. It’s real skill and professionalism that justify higher prices.

For a massage session I prefer 90 minutes. If it’s my first time with a masseur, I’ll usually start with a 60 minute session to see if we’re a good match. I’ve had a couple that were so underwhelming that I was wishing they would sort me on time. If we are talking massage and play, I prefer 90 min maybe 2 hours, depending on the provider. I think that 60 minutes massage and 30 min play time works rather well for me.

I may be wrong but from your post I think you have a provider trying to pressure you for money. Don’t let the threat scare you. As others have mentioned, police generally do not get involved in situations like this unless it involves serious crimes such as exploitation of minors or trafficking. Law enforcement focuses on larger threats, and proving an agreement or intent long after the fact is very difficult due to lack of evidence and legal time limits.

Honestly, once I’m gone, why would I care? That said, I do keep my devices fairly “clean,” especially my phone and laptop. I travel internationally quite often, so there’s always the possibility that my devices could be searched.

I don’t think the pics in those two profiles belong to the same person.

On a more serious note, it really doesn’t matter much to me. I have a son, and since we’re both fluent in English and Spanish, he calls me either Dad or “Papá”. I’m actually the one who sometimes calls him “Papi”. I also have a regular provider from Asia who calls me “dear”. The first time, I’ll admit it caught me a bit off guard, but I eventually realized it’s a language and cultural thing, so it doesn’t bother me at all. Honestly, as long as there’s no intention of disrespect and they do the job I’m paying them to do well, they can call me whatever they like.

I’ll admit I didn’t even realize there was a new “New” search option on RMen. You’re absolutely right, it doesn’t work properly and doesn’t actually show the newest providers. I wish I could say I’m surprised it doesn’t work as intended, but at this point I’ve learned to expect exactly that.

I’m guessing you’re not hiring Latins, since most of them will definitely call you “Papi.” 😂😂

Am I the only one who finds it interesting that most long-standing accounts/members tend to say they’ll pay after, while most newer ones usually insist on paying upfront?