RyanDean

I anticipation of a recent hiring weekend in NYC I reached out -- via text -- to a total of six gents over a couple days. My ask was "Do you expect to be in town and available on these dates?" (about two weeks from the days I was texting). In reply...
two offered no reply at all one confirmed he would be away that weekend, in an exchange was pleasant and direct and confirmed my continued interest in this provider one said he might be available but wouldn't know until a few days before, in a manner that was fine but didn't stir my further interest two (one of whom I had booked some while back) said they would definitely be available; both were friendly and flirty in their exchanges, with the new-to-me gent being unusually gregarious, funny, and responsive... In my followup exchanges with the four who did reply (including the gent who was not available), I asked "how far in advance do you prefer to book"? All four gave their answer in a way that gave me a clear vibe/impression on whether/how I wanted to proceed. With the two (including the gent I had booked previously) who confirmed that they would be available and inclined to meet, I followed up as per their preferred timeline and "penciled in" separate appointments on two different days. At which point I confirmed my interests, my general location, and their hourly. 

On the morning of the respective appointments, I followed up to confirm everything. With the gent I had booked previously, everything proceeded gratifyingly. With the new-to-me gent who was so fun and sexy via text, things didn't proceed as simply and, unfortunately (for me), he ultimately proved to be a no-show.

All of which is to say: when communicating with providers, you never know what you're gonna get. And I've learned not to put all my horny eggs (or expectations) into one basket. 

 

Another angle to consider is that some providers aren’t looking for this to be something they’re committed to or tied down to. Some guys see it as a fun way to get paid to do something sexual that they could likely do for free just as easily. It’s not about the money for them.
Escorting and massage aren’t the primary sources of income for all these guys. Some are in porn. OF. Some have “regular” jobs. Some are too immature to be reliable communicators. There is a host of possible reasons why a guy doesn’t reply.
I’m still not understanding how a provider would know if I’ve reached out to only him or to multiple guys from my opening text(s). That seems like an unfair and possibly false assumption for a provider to make, and if he does care about the work, a sure way to lose real clients.

I anticipation of a recent hiring weekend in NYC I reached out -- via text -- to a total of six gents over a couple days. My ask was "Do you expect to be in town and available on these dates?" (about two weeks from the days I was texting). In reply...
two offered no reply at all one confirmed he would be away that weekend, in an exchange was pleasant and direct and confirmed my continued interest in this provider one said he might be available but wouldn't know until a few days before, in a manner that was fine but didn't stir my further interest two (one of whom I had booked some while back) said they would definitely be available; both were friendly and flirty in their exchanges, with the new-to-me gent being unusually gregarious, funny, and responsive... In my followup exchanges with the four who did reply (including the gent who was not available), I asked "how far in advance do you prefer to book"? All four gave their answer in a way that gave me a clear vibe/impression on whether/how I wanted to proceed. With the two (including the gent I had booked previously) who confirmed that they would be available and inclined to meet, I followed up as per their preferred timeline and "penciled in" separate appointments on two different days. At which point I confirmed my interests, my general location, and their hourly. 

On the morning of the respective appointments, I followed up to confirm everything. With the gent I had booked previously, everything proceeded gratifyingly. With the new-to-me gent who was so fun and sexy via text, things didn't proceed as simply and, unfortunately (for me), he ultimately proved to be a no-show.

All of which is to say: when communicating with providers, you never know what you're gonna get. And I've learned not to put all my horny eggs (or expectations) into one basket. 

 

He's also a featured performer in this brilliant sketch...
 

How do they know how many providers you’re reaching out to? That’s an assumption unless it’s said upfront. And then you’re just stupid. No one knows how many people I’m in communication in general let alone about services.

Probably the happiest surprise of the season for me. Simple, funny, goodtime with a very appealing cast -- and Corey Cott's gorgeous and impressive arms.
Did you enjoy it @BenjaminNicholas?

I think that "what are your massage services?" is too vague from a provider prospective. The professional massage therapist is not likely to go into explaining neuromuscular, deep tissue, and swedish techniques. The client would likely receive a response if they say what exactly they are looking for. The therapist can say yes I provide that or no I do not do that. And if the client is actually looking for more of a sensual or nude experience with mutual touch than they should ask for that. A professional therapist is not likely to just offer that from the get-go (even if they are fine with this type of service). They can imply a "yes" I offer that more discreetly if it is brought up by the client.

It was the very best of what a jukebox musical does.  
And the '80s pastiche of it all was great.
I liked that they didn't 'broadway' up the music too much.  They kept Huey's songs pretty straight forward and the vocal arrangements didn't come across as jazzhands and cheese. 

He's also a featured performer in this brilliant sketch...
 

MaxBorderro - Male Escort, Gay massage - Los Angeles | Rent.Men
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I am not a fan of jukebox musicals, but I am a big fan of Corey Cott's. If I was in NYC while he was in it,  I would see if. 

Probably the happiest surprise of the season for me. Simple, funny, goodtime with a very appealing cast -- and Corey Cott's gorgeous and impressive arms.
Did you enjoy it @BenjaminNicholas?

The panorama seems to be changing. As the market keeps getting saturated with providers wanting to make money, their quality keeps lowering. It's a sad reality. I have experienced some providers who have't been responsive, but I've also experienced some who have responded, but way later, I mean weeks later.
As others state, there are many reasons why a provider might not get back to you, and they range from poor attitude towards their own work or their clients, to legitimate reasons around their availability.
I think it's good advice to keep those who have been responive, let the rest go, and not to get hung up on an unresponsive provider.

I anticipation of a recent hiring weekend in NYC I reached out -- via text -- to a total of six gents over a couple days. My ask was "Do you expect to be in town and available on these dates?" (about two weeks from the days I was texting). In reply...
two offered no reply at all one confirmed he would be away that weekend, in an exchange was pleasant and direct and confirmed my continued interest in this provider one said he might be available but wouldn't know until a few days before, in a manner that was fine but didn't stir my further interest two (one of whom I had booked some while back) said they would definitely be available; both were friendly and flirty in their exchanges, with the new-to-me gent being unusually gregarious, funny, and responsive... In my followup exchanges with the four who did reply (including the gent who was not available), I asked "how far in advance do you prefer to book"? All four gave their answer in a way that gave me a clear vibe/impression on whether/how I wanted to proceed. With the two (including the gent I had booked previously) who confirmed that they would be available and inclined to meet, I followed up as per their preferred timeline and "penciled in" separate appointments on two different days. At which point I confirmed my interests, my general location, and their hourly. 

On the morning of the respective appointments, I followed up to confirm everything. With the gent I had booked previously, everything proceeded gratifyingly. With the new-to-me gent who was so fun and sexy via text, things didn't proceed as simply and, unfortunately (for me), he ultimately proved to be a no-show.

All of which is to say: when communicating with providers, you never know what you're gonna get. And I've learned not to put all my horny eggs (or expectations) into one basket. 

 

Thanks, all. The consensus does seems to be that the combo of "no communication and no show" is the dealbreaker and that 15-30 minutes is a fair "grace period" in such situations. 
I did find that communicating the boundary of my patience ("if I don't hear back by ___") proved a sanity-saver for me yesterday, so I'll likely carry that forward.
And for those who might be interested:
The gent did ultimately contact me, about two hours after we were set to meet. His story -- if true -- would suggest that he simply had a very bad day, complicated by some truly bad luck. So I'm willing to accept that he may actually be legit, given the enthusiasm of other posters. As for me, I go back and forth on whether I believe the gent's story as I also take come comfort from the not-insubstantial pile of dollars that remain in my pocket.

Going silent is not OK. At the very least the provider should communicate if they are running late and an expected ETA. This communication should be sent before the scheduled meeting time. This is common courtesy and good business etiquette.
If there is no communication and no show, then I would wait no more than 15 minutes. Reach out to another provider or Grindr - as a bottom this type of behaviour is extremely frustrating given that I probably would not have eaten the entire day + spent a lot of time prepping for our meeting.

This! Communication is key, and 15 minutes without communication is my upper limit, as well.
Fortunately, all of my hires so far have been on time or communicative, even if just a few minutes late. I think the longest I've had to wait is 15 minutes. And, I've even had a few guys arrive "Japanese on-time" time: 5 - 10 minutes early.
One case that was somewhat different was a same day hire, who said that he would shower and head my way, but couldn't confirm an ETA. He seemed more worried about me flaking, as he spent his entire metro ride chatting with me over text.

Normally I don't have a set "grace period". In my opinion, you did good, communicating and letting the provider know that you are waiting, and providing ample time for him to respond. Seems appropriate to you, with enough time to hire another one if available at the moment. No respose from the provider could have been for a legitimate, fair reason, but if you haven't heard anything after, I think your grace period was appropriate.
Just to be fair, I have communicated the day after to see if there's a legitimate reason for the last minute ghosting. Things happen, so I give the benefit of the doubt. However, after that, if I don't hear from the provider, then either I was completely ghosted, or something major happened that makes the provider unable to communicate. I move on afterwards.
Sorry to hear. It sucks after so much discussion. Seems odd too, in light of there being testimonials about his quality, and because there was good communication before.

It would be foregivable if his phone went dead but my guess is that’s not what happened. One cancellation without an excuse is a hard pass for me. Two back to back cancellations for any reason is also a hard pass

Like others said, I try to arrange my sessions so there's wiggle room. I tried hiring a guy right before an appointment, and told him that, and he still showed up 20 minutes late.
I'm also a looooot more tolerant if my regulars are running late. My regulars are all very punctual, so I know it's beyond their control, and they do text me.
Radio silence for 20 minutes or so, after the appointment time, will result in me texting them and cancelling the session. One time a guy went radio silent, then claimed it was because he couldn't find my place, and left 30 minutes early since he considered that "part of the session." I rubbed in the review I gave him on RM.

Thanks, all. The consensus does seems to be that the combo of "no communication and no show" is the dealbreaker and that 15-30 minutes is a fair "grace period" in such situations. 
I did find that communicating the boundary of my patience ("if I don't hear back by ___") proved a sanity-saver for me yesterday, so I'll likely carry that forward.
And for those who might be interested:
The gent did ultimately contact me, about two hours after we were set to meet. His story -- if true -- would suggest that he simply had a very bad day, complicated by some truly bad luck. So I'm willing to accept that he may actually be legit, given the enthusiasm of other posters. As for me, I go back and forth on whether I believe the gent's story as I also take come comfort from the not-insubstantial pile of dollars that remain in my pocket.

Thanks, all. The consensus does seems to be that the combo of "no communication and no show" is the dealbreaker and that 15-30 minutes is a fair "grace period" in such situations. 
I did find that communicating the boundary of my patience ("if I don't hear back by ___") proved a sanity-saver for me yesterday, so I'll likely carry that forward.
And for those who might be interested:
The gent did ultimately contact me, about two hours after we were set to meet. His story -- if true -- would suggest that he simply had a very bad day, complicated by some truly bad luck. So I'm willing to accept that he may actually be legit, given the enthusiasm of other posters. As for me, I go back and forth on whether I believe the gent's story as I also take come comfort from the not-insubstantial pile of dollars that remain in my pocket.

Thanks, all. The consensus does seems to be that the combo of "no communication and no show" is the dealbreaker and that 15-30 minutes is a fair "grace period" in such situations. 
I did find that communicating the boundary of my patience ("if I don't hear back by ___") proved a sanity-saver for me yesterday, so I'll likely carry that forward.
And for those who might be interested:
The gent did ultimately contact me, about two hours after we were set to meet. His story -- if true -- would suggest that he simply had a very bad day, complicated by some truly bad luck. So I'm willing to accept that he may actually be legit, given the enthusiasm of other posters. As for me, I go back and forth on whether I believe the gent's story as I also take come comfort from the not-insubstantial pile of dollars that remain in my pocket.

I typically allow 15 to 30 minutes, depending on the location and time of day. The duration also depends on the quality of their communication regarding the situation. I had a regular who always sent a screenshot of Google Maps showing the estimated time of arrival when he was en route. I valued this approach greatly, prompting me to adopt the same practice for in-call appointments.

I typically apply the same rule as to non provider meets - I’ll say (unless it’s an immediate booking) “I’ll confirm before heading out  an hour before our appointment and won’t leave till I hear back”. I also request if they’re busy an hour before our time that they confirm from their end sometime before then. 
works quite well as it covers for most of the typical scenarios:
- something better came up but I can’t be bothered to tell you
- I’m partied out and have lost sense of time and commitments 
- I wasn’t realistic on when I’d be free and expected you would hang around but didn’t want to lose the booking 
- I’m so good the prior client wanted to extend so I couldn’t take your call 
If there’s no response I leave a voicemail and text so there’s a record saying given the time it will take me to get there if I don’t hear back within 10-15 mins we can consider the appointment canceled.
I’ve had a mix of apologetic call backs immediately / requests for a later time / abusive “you’re a flake” accusations and - “you’re so uptight … what’s half … one … one and a half hours to wait for the mighty moi”. As well as absolutely no response at all. 
My favorite recent excuse was “I was fine but my partner wanted reshoots for our only fans content so I got held up at the studio”