SouthOfTheBorder

I appreciate you being vulnerable in disclosing this information - super helpful because I think this is frequent thought. and I think you’re in a really good place to expand your experiences. Lots of new clients have issues w guilt & shame around the idea of paid sex & all that entails. You don’t express any of that. So, that’s a huge win already & you’re ahead of the game. With more experience you will gain confidence. And for me, it’s been liberating & empowering to own my desires and make it happen, without shame, guilt, apologies or explanations. Hiring providers also forces me to confront my own hangups - because to get what I want, I must communicate that clearly to a provider and come to agreement. I can’t just think someone might know what I’m thinking or expecting. I’m not talking about a scripted encounter - but the basics and anything that might be a necessity. I’m also in a relationship, so that forces clear communication with my partner about things I used to consider uncomfortable. This is a huge opportunity for personal growth - depending on how you look at it & proceed. And lots & lots of pleasure. Enjoy !

there are very few escorts who attempt to screen clients based on looks and/or how sexually attractive a potential client may be. if you get that vibe in any way - go the other way & cross that provider off your list. It’s not a sustainable business model for the provider and just shows they aren’t professional and probably haven’t been around very long. The sex would probably be bad too. In some circumstances, I could see the provider asking for a pic after a meeting is setup, just as a security measure & not as a way to screen clients. I frequently choose to send a face pic as an introduction if I don’t know the provider - only to show that I’m serious, a real person and not wasting his time. My sense is providers are inundated with anonymous requests & questions from guys that have no intention of an actual hire. A voluntary face pic seems to cut through the clutter on the providers end. It works for me. No provider is out of your league. Go for it.

true - yet I haven’t seen the same type comments re; physical attractiveness about other regions of Mexico compared to Sinaloa. It seems to be something that is commonly discussed and the people are very proud of it. References seems to include virility of the men w machismo mixed in.

I’ve read & heard the Sinaloans are thought to be among the most attractive people in Mexico. For real.

👆the most accurate statement in entire thread. gracias 🙏🏻

Since the OP brought up Mexico, in addition to San Diego - let’s give that some thought It’s possible there could be a city in Mexico that is completely off-the-radar and underserved by providers. A hidden little jewel so to speak. Ever heard of Culiacan, MX ? 1million people and no provider listings. Nicely situated near Gulf of California with mountains & hot springs nearby. Not far from Mazatlan and Cabo San Lucas. I suppose the one downside could be it’s the HQ of the Sinaloa Drug Cartel. But, those guys need some love too. Sounds a bit “Ozark” if you know the show - but what an adventure and evidently, no competition ! I love Mexico - it’s South of the Border !!!

you’ll have a great time. I’ve been going there for 16 years + with many visits each year. I’ve known about 6 the regulars there for at least 6 years and socialize with some of them outside the sauna. It’s consistently been the same over the years because the core clientele likes a certain type. There are some variations of course, but most are the guy-next- door body types that you’d find in Lagoa. The only real change since the pandemic is I don’t see the muscle guys so much anymore. I never understand the negative reviews here sometimes because I’ve just never experienced that in my dozens & dozens of visits. It leads me to believe the issue is not with Thermas or the working guys, but rather unrealistic expectations, bad attitudes or entitled behavior that is so common among tourists. The guys at Thermas (or any other similar sauna) have literally seen it all & have excellent BS detectors and avoid the people they perceive to be problematic. That too may explain some of the negative reviews here.

no - this is your standard response when members tell you the truth and this is also your standard response to anyone who questions the nonsense. Same exact reply in several threads

this is known as a posting history, which is contained in this thread

it has nothing to do with stating boundaries I’m a relatively new member here - less than a year, so I had no idea about your history on this site which goes back several years under a few different names. I didn’t go looking for your old posts - another member posted a link to some of your old posts that contained the same sort of nonsensical statements/questions/posts on a variety of topics. After briefly reviewing those posts & several long-time members reactions to those posts - the appearance is you are not interested in any real help or advice, just engaging members here with the nonsense. That’s the problem - people were sincerely trying to help you & you’re playing some sort of game and wasting everyone’s time. My sense now is that you go through episodes just like this, where you are found out, then a bunch of members place you on ignore and then you start again with unsuspecting people that don’t know your game. Then you run to the mods and complain, trying to get them to delete posts that look bad for you. Just my opinion - but I think every bit of this is bullshit and that seems to be a recurring theme because that’s what many members have posted in direct responses to you over the years. It’s easy to verify because it’s all here. In this case, screenshots are not your friend. You’ve been wasting peoples time for years here who were all trying to sincerely help you. Pathetic btw - your constant nonsense questions/posts about being an escort are insulting to the real escorts here, who are trying to really improve the way they do business and take this all seriously. The providers here make their living this way. It’s a job that requires a lot of skill, hard work & dedication - and you treat it like a joke. They aren’t here to pose hypothetical nonsense to generate controversy, get attention or kill time. Clearly, you do not make a living doing escort work. I can’t imagine any real client who would ever hire you based on how you present yourself here.

don’t waste your time guys - this is a pattern

I’m no longer so curious

the picky comment was because he indicated he wanted to select clients based on how they look & how sexually appealing they are to him - not because the potential clients were pleasant or unpleasant. broadly accepted - that’s not how it works. for lack of a better term, it’s delusional & called Grindr (for free) the nycboi / socurious shtick has been playing for quite some time - is it even real ?

appears there was a name change: nycboi > socurious yes ? several people have asked you to post your RM profile link - why not ? I’m so curious

that can be tricky - there are so many closures that you wouldn’t know about like parades routinely on the east side w major closures, construction, street fairs, security perimeters, accidents, etc. vast majority of taxi drivers are honest & know what they’re doing. I watch closely the first few moves and make suggestions if appears off-course. They almost always have a valid reason for doing what they’re doing if you ask. Rule of thumb - never get in a taxi when public trans will do. It’s faster & cheaper 90% of the time. I’ve never experienced the “tourist treatment” - they can tell very quickly if you live there or not. just by now you give the address.

I didn’t realize he’s 40 - a little late to be entering this game statistically, but not impossible. just improbable. Given he won’t kiss, won’t travel, doesn’t like to do his own marketing research & seems to be picky about the people he engages with - this career choice does not look promising.

x

Isn’t that the point ? Escorts, whether they know it or not, are creating a brand identify from the moment they enter the scene, usually by a listing on RM or similar site. From that moment going forward, the public brand or image is shaped by site reviews, Twitter, OnlyFans, personal appearances, forums word-of-mouth & self-participation in forums like this. All of that goes to image and reputation. I’m not sure that an escort complaining about all the typical escort issues in an online forum (that is populated by people who hire escorts) where the escorts identity is known and affects his brand or image is helpful. Some people might think the escort is too negative and others might think too uptight/rigid. Others might just be turned off by the complaining. I don’t think it has any upside for the escort, other than if it makes them feel better by venting. When I hire, I’m looking for a bit of an escape, adventure, fantasy & sex all rolled into one hour. And I want it to be easy. If there was an escort that I wanted to hire & was very public about all his complaints, troubles, frustrations, etc - i wouldn’t hire that person because maybe that negativity could show up in my appointment ? I’d choose to hire the person who presents publicly as happy, successful, fun & sexy. I want to maximize my chances of having a good experience and not get caught up in any provider negativity, however than manifests. Of course everyone has struggles & challenges - it’s how a person deals with them that makes the difference. A positive mindset is everything and if that can be created, then eventually positive things start to happen. And the reverse is also true.

exactly correct. However, it’s usually people with very little experience with lawyers that are quick to recommend getting a lawyer. The first thing they always offer is a letter & that can mean nothing in a legal context, except if it’s a Cease & Desist. Beyond that, it’s filing an actual lawsuit and that is completely unrealistic in the circumstances described. In my professional life, I worked with dozens of lawyers on every subject imaginable. It’s never quick, easy or inexpensive- even for obvious egregious basic things. Lawyers are in the business to make money - not get justice served. Even if you happen to find an honest attorney interested in offering real help, it’s still insanely expensive.

there are many things posted in this forum that “don’t pass the smell test” - and it’s usually obvious. For the clients here that have long history of hiring, or providers with years of experience - it’s easy to spot stories that don’t make sense, are a one-sided version of events, or just absurd statements/questions not based in reality. As for contacting lawyers - bad advice & costly. A simple letter from a lawyer can cost $3500 and it’s just that - a letter. Going beyond a letter will get expensive quick at $350 - $700 per hour. Restraining orders are not simple things to get and that’s even more money. Maybe filing a police report would help, but the police will want to know the exact circumstances of meeting the blackmailer & number of times meeting the person. Lying to the police is terrible advice - when they figure out the truth (and they will), then the complaint will be completely discredited. While vast majority of providers would never blackmail - it’s always a good idea to limit the personal information disclosed. Providers usually do the same unless they have public social media in their real names. One of the main reasons to hire is to keep things private & discreet.

preaching about not using stereotypes - then using a stereotype in making that point kind of negates the entire thing. It’s always helpful when posters have just a bit of self-awareness

this is super smart for many reasons. getting ready & doing an outcall requires the same exact effort to prepare/travel whether one hour or 3 hours - so why not discount the rate to get an overall bigger spend ? 1 hour at $300 vs 3hours at $600 ? Or similar …..yet, vast majority of escorts do not offer this and some will balk at any discounts whatsoever on some sort of principal when it makes perfect business sense. Most do not get the concept. And the clients that hire longer multi-hour appointments have more money & want a more relaxed time with breaks for drinks, etc. it’s not like 3 hours of nonstop sex. Plus, the longer appointments allow escort to develop a relationship with client to increase probability of additional hires and longer times. This is very simple, yet very few do it. Some offer overnight rates - I don’t get that personally, I have zero interest hiring someone to sleep.

an escorts listed rate means nothing. a rate that a,client will pay has so many variables that it’s impossible to quantify without complete information & seeing the escorts profile. even then, what somone will pay is not some standard formula. how many positive reviews does the escort have, how long has the person been advertising as an escort, what do the pics look like & what will the escort do ? Is the escort a porn star, or does the escort have a big social media following like OnlyFans or Instagram ? Based on a previous threade, you said no kissing. That’s a huge turn-off for majority of potential clients & completely removes most potential clients from ever hiring you. You also said only one review - that’s another problem where people won’t hire you. Unless you have some special type of service, appeal to a niche group, or are social media famous ……it doesn’t look good. Becoming a successful escort takes work and some self-awareness re: what you’re willing to do vs what people are willing to pay. I can’t imagine anyone paying $300 for an escort with one review & wont do the basics. The chances are worse once you get outside of the major cities. it’s not an easy job and many did that out the hard way. Any city that has nice weather & decent quality of life is going to be saturated with escorts. That’s a fact

I don’t think escorting is that much different from other professions. There are people that excel & become the best, regardless of where they are located - of course, competition is a factor to consider because in a super competitive market it requires a lot of work & dedication to make it. The very best providers are in NYC because it’s the #1 market in the world for potential income - that’s based on the number of providers working there & the rates they charge. There are very few other places that have an affluent population, lots of gay men with disposable income and a steady influx of tourists & executives with money to burn. London maybe comes close, yet the rates are less. LA would be right up there too. The top tier guys I know & hire are based in NY/Miami (between the two cities) and then have a loose travel schedule around then world based on where their target clients go at specific times. And they keep in mind that can’t charge NY prices in Greece, for example. Versus a relatively small city like San Diego that can’t compare to NYC in any way. It’s not close enough to LA to make both cities work together. And because of the small size it would be an everyone knows everyone situation very quickly. Providers based in small cities have their own set of complaints - small base of potential clients and people unwilling to pay. It really comes down to a lifestyle choice & being satisfied with those circumstances. I’ve found that people seeking geographic solutions to their issues in specific places very seldom cure the problem with a move. The issues seem to follow that person wherever they go. But, way easier & cheaper places to live than NY where almost everything is complicated & expensive. The things that make an escort successful are reliability, professionalism, positive attitude & the ability to quickly determine which potential clients are right for them vs the time-wasters/flakes. Most people think it’s being the youngest, best body or best looking- yet none of that matters if the person is unreliable or a flake. The top-tier guys I know never ever complain about their clients, hotel costs, cancellations, the cities where they work or anything else: they just make it happen. The true mark of any kind of professional is when it just appears effortless to those on the outside. And, the successful guys have figured out that reviews & reputation are everything in an increasingly online & competitive marketplace.

Not all Jukebox musicals are created equal - but most are money-grabs & not creative. The worst ones seem to be when the performer is long gone & the estate is just tying to make more money. I’d see Hells Kitchen at the Public tho - a different thing entirely. Re: sing-a-longs on Bway: I saw Hamilton twice - once before Covid where it was fantastic. Then I saw it again after Covid and after Hamilton had been streaming on Disney Plus for months. It turned into a sing-a-long show. Completely ruined the theatre experience, where I’m paying to hear the cast sing - not the person in the next seat. Totally selfish. Why go to theatre if you don’t want to hear the cast perform ??