Is it okay to ask an escort....

[Sammmmm]

whether you have STDs or bareback with his clients. Even if I use condom every time I hire escort, I still want to know if he has STDs or even bareback with clients. I assume I will also have higher chances of getting STD if he bareback since using condom only reduces risks.

 

Some escorts said "They are clean". What do they mean clean in terms of escorting? or did anyone get STD from clients? How did you protect yourself other than using condom and prep?

[OccassionalHire]

With regard to bareback, if they list "ask me" or "anything goes" on their profile, I assume they do bareback with clients (which is not automatically a disqualification for me). With regard to STDs, of course you can ask. The question is how much confidence you should have in the answer.

 

And if you always use condoms with escorts, why does it matter if they bareback with others. If you are not confident that condoms will protect you from HIV, you shouldn't be doing this.

[MichBoyBlake]

One thing I know some clients do, and I actually think is kind of a smart approach to figuring this out, is to ask the escort if they're willing to bareback for you. If they say yes or even try to negotiate it, then you can probably assume they've done that with clients before. If they say no, then you have the answer you were hoping for.

I've definitely been tested with that question by clients a few times. It doesn't bother me though because I also never bareback so it's not like that sort of question is something that puts me on my toes haha.

[Guest gapguy]

[]

[MichBoyBlake]

I'm curious what other escorts think of this question, particularly when the ad says "safe only".

 

I know I'm not other escorts and the same person you quoted lol, but I'm not trying to stop other escorts from putting in their 2 cents either.

In a slightly more perfect world, clients would look through my whole profile and read everything before contacting me. In reality that actually happens pretty infrequently... although the ones that do actually read everything and don't ask questions that are already answered on the ad, do tend to be the best clients.

That being said I'm just so used to answering questions that the client should already know the answer to if they actually looked through my whole ad that I honestly didn't even think of the fact that my ad says "safe only" yet I do get asked if I'm willing to bareback or not, until you just brought it up haha.

[Ryan Roman]

With regard to bareback, if they list "ask me" or "anything goes" on their profile, I assume they do bareback with clients (which is not automatically a disqualification for me). With regard to STDs, of course you can ask. The question is how much confidence you should have in the answer.

 

And if you always use condoms with escorts, why does it matter if they bareback with others. If you are not confident that condoms will protect you from HIV, you shouldn't be doing this.

 

I agree. If they advertise "anything goes" it's reasonable to assume they are barebacking with clients or in their personal lives (or both). I never get offend if someone asks my STI status... A client does have the right to inquire.

[+ GregM]

You can ask any question till the cows come home. As for STI's at the time of question the escort might be free of them as far as he knows. But if you book days in advance he might pick something up along the way and not realize it till a week or few days later. And if he got syphilis he might never know till he gets tested for STI's. As for having a higher chance of getting an STI cause a hooker goes bare is dumb imo. How many of you hookers and clients wear a rubber for sucking dick? How many use a dental dam when you eat ass? The op really needs to pull his head out of his ass and go talk to a Dr. Hell, maybe one of our medical guys on here can chime in?

 

Hugs,

Greg

[muscmtl]

I agree. If they advertise "anything goes" it's reasonable to assume they are barebacking with clients or in their personal lives (or both). I never get offend if someone asks my STI status... A client does have the right to inquire.

 

they have to bb, that s what anything goes mean... if they dont report them

[+ OliverSaks]

That is very true! Unless someone is completely "safe" including with oral stuff then he does not know at all times he is clean. Just from last checkup. Alot of people forget about other forms of STIs that one can get from the things you mentioned. I know I'm in the extreme minority, but I do always use a condom when I suck a dick (It turns off some causing me to lose out on some clients...but it keeps my mouth clean from the things you mentioned which is more important to me). Again I'm in the minority I know. So your statement is correct for most out there. Cause they probably don't. I do feel there is a market for guys like me that are ultra safe though. I might lose out on many clients that aren't into it, but I will attract a few that want me for that reason. Maybe there should be a tab on the ads for "kinda safe" and "safe only" LOL

When do you bring up condom-for-oral with potential clients?

[+ Keith30309]

When do you bring up condom-for-oral with potential clients?

 

..... On the other hand if a guy wants me to go down there I just quietly pull out one of my cherry pop condoms and slide it on down there. The only reason to have an issue with it is if one doesn't like the taste. It's my mouth though not theirs. LOL

 

I was sort of wondering the same thing. For those who practice this, is it something I would learn while making an appointment? Or after our time together has begun ?

 

The reason I ask is that it’s not something I prefer and, while I’ve only encountered it with one gentleman, I’d have liked to have known about it in advance.

[Bearofdistinction]

I was sort of wondering the same thing. For those who practice this, is it something I would learn while making an appointment? Or after our time together has begun ?

 

The reason I ask is that it’s not something I prefer and, while I’ve only encountered it with one gentleman, I’d have liked to have known about it in advance.

 

Dude glad you practice safer sex -- does that mean you require condoms when I swallow your cock down to the pubes>????

[+ JEC]

I think asking the question is fair game, I would not bank my own safety on their answer. Some may not be truthful, some may not know (in other words, time between contracting something & being diagnosed/treated). Each of us has to become educated and decide our own risk tolerance, and what we consider safe.....then take whatever precautions you need to feel safe. Adjusting your behavior based on what people tell you is a losing game.

 

BTW the term "clean" is derogatory and not really PC anymore. Sex is a normal human function, and it only takes sex with one person to contract something. There are a million scenarios where people have contracted HIV or other STDs...to imply they are "dirty" is truly denigrating and disrespectful.

[+ OliverSaks]

I think asking the question is fair game, I would not bank my own safety on their answer. Some may not be truthful, some may not know (in other words, time between contracting something & being diagnosed/treated). Each of us has to become educated and decide our own risk tolerance, and what we consider safe.....then take whatever precautions you need to feel safe. Adjusting your behavior based on what people tell you is a losing game.

 

BTW the term "clean" is derogatory and not really PC anymore. Sex is a normal human function, and it only takes sex with one person to contract something. There are a million scenarios where people have contracted HIV or other STDs...to imply they are "dirty" is truly denigrating and disrespectful.

Absolutely dehumanizing shorthand to use “clean” the way so many people still do (on the apps, on ads, while communicating to book appts)

https://marksking.com/my-fabulous-disease/the-stupid-question-are-you-clean/

[Cruiser7]

@AJ Doyle I think that should be brought up before the appointment. I do not like a condom for oral and that would be a major influence in me hiring you. To not bring it up ahead of time is disingenuous to me.

 

Note: I’m not saying you shouldn’t perform oral without a condom if that’s your thing, but at least let the client know ahead of time.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

whether you have STDs or bareback with his clients. Even if I use condom every time I hire escort, I still want to know if he has STDs or even bareback with clients. I assume I will also have higher chances of getting STD if he bareback since using condom only reduces risks.

 

Some escorts said "They are clean". What do they mean clean in terms of escorting? or did anyone get STD from clients? How did you protect yourself other than using condom and prep?

 

 

Sure, it's okay to ask.

 

Better question: Do you believe everything people tell you?

 

I know plenty of people who say they're on PrEP, but they're not.

 

I know people who say they're HIV- and don't say anything to their sex partners about actually being HIV+

 

People are people: Imperfect. Protect yourself the best you can.

[Mydavid]

I usually ask escorts how often they do STD test and when was the last time they did the test.

Nobody can really know if they have STD.

Edited May 29, 2018 by Mydavid

[Cruiser7]

@AJ Doyle Thank you for your response. Please don’t inhibit your postings because someone disagrees with you. After all, this is a discussion forum and requires posts to survive.

 

Besides, you’ll always find someone to disagree with a stance you take and it’s no reflection on you (or them). I can post “I like blue cars” and someone will invariably come back with a litany of posts spelling out why I’m an idiot for liking blue instead of yellow cars. It’s life on message boards, so please don’t let that dissuade you from posting.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

@AJ Doyle Thank you for your response. Please don’t inhibit your postings because someone disagrees with you. After all, this is a discussion forum and requires posts to survive

 

I agree, but also consider that some escorts business can thrive or die based on how they come across here.

 

It would be swell if everybody could be totally 100% honest, but that's just not the reality of how this works.

[Cruiser7]

I agree, but also consider that some escorts business can thrive or die based on how they come across here.

 

It would be swell if everybody could be totally 100% honest, but that's just not the reality of how this works.

 

I totally agree with that, Benjamin. In fact, based on some escort’s responses on these threads, they have made me want to hire them even more.

[marylander1940]

whether you have STDs or bareback with his clients. Even if I use condom every time I hire escort, I still want to know if he has STDs or even bareback with clients. I assume I will also have higher chances of getting STD if he bareback since using condom only reduces risks.

 

Some escorts said "They are clean". What do they mean clean in terms of escorting? or did anyone get STD from clients? How did you protect yourself other than using condom and prep?

 

If you have sex you're at risk to get an STD.

 

[marylander1940]

whether you have STDs or bareback with his clients. Even if I use condom every time I hire escort, I still want to know if he has STDs or even bareback with clients. I assume I will also have higher chances of getting STD if he bareback since using condom only reduces risks.

 

Some escorts said "They are clean". What do they mean clean in terms of escorting? or did anyone get STD from clients? How did you protect yourself other than using condom and prep?

 

If you have sex you're at risk to get an STD.

 

[+ freecahill1965]

I was sort of wondering the same thing. For those who practice this, is it something I would learn while making an appointment? Or after our time together has begun ?

 

The reason I ask is that it’s not something I prefer and, while I’ve only encountered it with one gentleman, I’d have liked to have known about it in advance.

I would have to agree with Keith. I have only dealt with escorts who state that they play safe but NONE have used condoms for oral. I think that "playing safe" is a term for using a condom for at risk activities such as anal sex. When I do see play safe, I always ask if they require condoms for oral. I have yet to have someone say yes. Of course if they did say yes to do oral, it would be a deal breaker.

[+ freecahill1965]

I was sort of wondering the same thing. For those who practice this, is it something I would learn while making an appointment? Or after our time together has begun ?

 

The reason I ask is that it’s not something I prefer and, while I’ve only encountered it with one gentleman, I’d have liked to have known about it in advance.

I would have to agree with Keith. I have only dealt with escorts who state that they play safe but NONE have used condoms for oral. I think that "playing safe" is a term for using a condom for at risk activities such as anal sex. When I do see play safe, I always ask if they require condoms for oral. I have yet to have someone say yes. Of course if they did say yes to do oral, it would be a deal breaker.

[+ OliverSaks]

Yeah most would be smart to ask. Oral is actually a risk activity though. Syphilis and Ghonorea for instance can be received thru Oral and are ranked the highest in the nation here in CA where I live cause alot of people think it's not a at risky activity here. And it's mostly the one doing the "Sucking" that is at risk. You are smart to ask though. I am pretty sure I'm in the 1% though, so I always tell my clients. Honestly I would lose a few regulars if I ever caught something, so the risk is not worth it to me. If a guy wants to go down on me without a condom I can show my tests and that I am disease free...so I will let a guy do that if he wants as I'm not putting him at risk. I have yet to meet a client with a recent test though, so I'm always going to use a condom if I get on my knees. So I say yes "Ask about oral" when you see "play safe", but honestly you will probably never run into another one like myself that is this safe as most are not. #1% lol

How about, because you are the rarity, you just make sure you are up front?

 

Just wanted to comment on the bold part, and echo what others have said on this forum about risk, but any sex has some level of risk. Even anal sex while wearing a condom - the condom slides down or isn’t totally covering all the skin that is contacting and slamming into the bottom’s bottom - still puts people at risk for skin-borne things (HPV, HSV) - I highly doubt any doc or clinic testing for these each time you get tested, so please please don’t count yourself as zero risk. It’s incredibly foolish to think, even as a self-described 1%’er, that a sex worker is ever zero risk. (I could go into more shit , from my days as a planned parenthood peer sex educator or state gov HIV counselor, but suffice to say, your righteousness, I think, is misplaced)

 

If you’ve had any sex since your last test, you just don’t know!

[LaffingBear]

Sure, it's okay to ask.

 

Better question: Do you believe everything people tell you?

 

I know plenty of people who say they're on PrEP, but they're not.

 

I know people who say they're HIV- and don't say anything to their sex partners about actually being HIV+

 

People are people: Imperfect. Protect yourself the best you can.

Excellent Response... couldnt resist adding my comment.

 

Its ok to politely ask almost anything of most anyone.

 

But for the questions specified, no matter the answers, protecting yourself is your duty, and basing your protection on someone else's assurances is foolhardy.