Unrelaxing massage

[MassageDrew]

Have you guys ever had a massage where you couldn't relax at all? I went to Sir Spa in Chicago for a 90-minute massage. The masseur's technique was good. Unfortunately, either he was hungry or ate something bad. I can hear his tummy growling along with the background music. I thought he was going to sh*t his pants and all over me LOL. I felt bad cuz I've had one of those days after eating certain foods although at the same time I didn't really get to relax.

[LADoug1]

Had a massage with a guy who sweated profusely and it dripped on me all through the massage. It wasn't even warm in the room. Not a good experience!

[+ Just Sayin]

yes; maybe it was the guy; maybe the surroundings; sometimes I might not feel comfortable for some reason; probably worth heeding those feelings

[body2body]

I hired a guy who advertised "deep tissue". I spent an agonizing hour on the table while he seemed intent on rearranging my internal organs. He kept asking about the pressure, and then completely ignored my requests to reduce the pressure. When he finally finished he had the nerve to ask if I wanted to schedule another appointment. I fixed a gaze on him that should have resulted in his bursting into flames, and told him he would be lucky if I didn't file a lawsuit against him and encouraged him to leave imediately.

[liubit]

Every massage I have had has been unrelaxing and unpleasant, each and everyone of them. I intensely dislike massages.

[+ beethoven]

Sorry to bring a ray of sunshine to your parade of gloom, but a new spa, Utopia Spa, has opened in New York, at Lexington Ave and 70th St. It's VERY relaxing, clean, friendly, and professional. If Massage Drew visits the Big Apple, he should include this one.

[+ poolboy48220]

I met a local guy for massage who kept focusing on my achilles tendon, even when I told him to stop because it hurt. I didn't repeat. Shame, we'd had a few fun times off the table (although it'd been a while since he'd gone that far).

[MassageDrew]

Had a massage with a guy who sweated profusely and it dripped on me all through the massage. It wasn't even warm in the room. Not a good experience!

 

That would force me to end the massage and sent him home. Gross

[MassageDrew]

Wow so many bad experiences. I thought maybe I'm just the only one choosing the wrong masseurs. Thanks guys

[UpDownUnder]

During allergy season I laid face-down and within five minutes both sinuses COMPLETELY closed up, so that I had no choice but to breathe through my mouth, and then within another few minutes, my nose started to run - significantly - with no way to reach under the table with my hands to wipe my nose. So basically I had nasal water torture going on, which is not optimal for relaxing the rest of my body.

[+ quoththeraven]

I hired a guy who advertised "deep tissue". I spent an agonizing hour on the table while he seemed intent on rearranging my internal organs. He kept asking about the pressure, and then completely ignored my requests to reduce the pressure. When he finally finished he had the nerve to ask if I wanted to schedule another appointment. I fixed a gaze on him that should have resulted in his bursting into flames, and told him he would be lucky if I didn't file a lawsuit against him and encouraged him to leave imediately.

I can't hack deep tissue massage either. I chalk it up to my fibromyalgia, chronic pain and fatigue.

[Meo]

During allergy season I laid face-down and within five minutes both sinuses COMPLETELY closed up, so that I had no choice but to breathe through my mouth, and then within another few minutes, my nose started to run - significantly - with no way to reach under the table with my hands to wipe my nose. So basically I had nasal water torture going on, which is not optimal for relaxing the rest of my body.

This is actually pretty common, and a lot of massage therapists will not be offended or surprised if you need to tuck some tissues under your chin and blow as needed while your back is worked on. I have the allergies and also am easily distracted by stomachs growling, but I try to use these to mindfully talk myself down into relaxation where I see the distraction but let it wash over me. I would rather have the growling stomach to the massage therapist reeking of hastily consumed fast food, which I find much harder to ignore and much more a problem!

[+ bashful]

my nose started to run - significantly

 

Usually happens to me too.

[JayCeeKy]

I will relate an opposite experience with my Physical Therapist who is a bodybuilder with a gorgeous face. When I am on his table he puts my arm up between the cleavage of his pecs (he wears Ban-Lon Polo shirts) in order to "stretch" my shoulder/arm muscles. I can assure you that he is stretching more muscles on me than he is intending.

[Mo Mason]

I've only had one pro massage in my life. I got a boner. It was awkward.

 

She was a much older woman.