MassageM4M

[+ SimplyAdam]

Gentlemen -

 

This past May, along with hundreds of others, I was arbitrarily banned from MasseurFinder (which, when it allowed links to personal websites, attracted a more mindful - and soulful - clientele, and an average of about 100 individual views to my website every day - not to mention accounted for almost 80% of new clients, half of whom came for companionship or coaching). This was a massive loss, and one I couldn't begin to recover even if they allowed me back on, as the overwhelming majority of men who frequent gay massage sites are seeking a man-to-man connection beyond mere bodywork - and my website presents a person, not a one-off service.

 

MassageM4M recently sent some of us a "you have one chance to abide by our user policy or be banned" email regarding the exact text they approved four months ago (by an employee they just let go of, it turns out) and, given that the non-erotic work I do is especially nuanced and multi-faceted (as any thoughtful work is), I suspect that in even trying to abide by the policies my chance will be lost by a myopic interpretation and I'll lose out on the three or four clients a month I pay $200 for (in other words, I can afford to be barred - hence, this post).

 

Below are the new policies. If anyone is interested, I'd be thankful if you'd look over the text I'll submit and give me feedback. I've omitted words like "affirming," "loving" - and suspect using "connection" or "intuitive" might land me in hot water. What a pitiful state our government has put us in.

 

What are your thoughts?

 

Adam

 

***

• • • Content Policy – The following guidelines shall be applied to any and all textual material included, or submitted with the intention of inclusion, in a Masseur Advertisement, unless noted otherwise. Text utilizing, describing, or otherwise publishing any of the following references, either express or implied, are strictly prohibited from publication via the Site or Services:
      
      • Sexual services, or engaging in activities requiring the payment of money for sex or other illegal activities.
        
      • Sexually explicit, sexually suggestive, or language with sexual connotation. Connotation means the associated or secondary meaning for a word or expression apart from its explicit meaning; the suggesting of an additional meaning for a word or expression, apart from its explicit meaning.
        
      • Nude massage therapy services.
        
      • Massage therapy services involving direct contact and/or stimulation to the groin or genital area.
        
      • Clients massaging the masseur
        
      • Fabricated or made-up words or terminology, not commonly found in the English language, or that may imply or suggest a relationship to another word that is prohibited by this Content Policy.
        
      • Language that may entice someone about the possibility of sexual activity.
        
      • Defamatory toward any person, group, other Masseurs, the Site, or the provided Services (this includes Our staff and clients).
        
      • Interpretation and/or opinion regarding any of the Site’s user documents, guidelines, or policies (e.g.: "This website's strict policies will not allow me to list all the services I offer.").
        
      • Any services, other than massage therapy services.
        
      • Any illegal activities or services.
        
      • A commercial spa, salon, or health club, and/or the services provided by the same.
        
      • Sales transactions. This includes, but is not limited to selling products or goods, solicitation for charitable donations, or employment offerings and arrangements.
        
      • SPAM messages, including keyword spamming.
        
      • [APPLICABLE TO AD DESCRIPTION SECTION ONLY] Personal contact information such as email address, phone number, third party website links, and social media usernames.
        
      • Language which, taken as a whole, while otherwise compliant of Our requirements, gives the overall impression that the Advertiser intends to engage in activities that are illegal or otherwise inconsistent with Our policies, practices, and/or business philosophy.
        

[+ honcho]

Thank you for sharing this with us. You be better believe I'm not going to click on any button that might imply that I like the content, but I'm certainly not going to shoot the messenger; merely offer my empathy . . .

[TruHart1]

It would seem to me, unless a masseur wants only to advertise legitimate (non-sexual) massage therapy, he would be wasting the fee of $200 per month for the ad if he cannot indicate any other therapies he wishes to offer. If you cannot even link a website such as your Simply Adam http://simplyadam.com/ to your MassageM4M ad and direct interested parties to all your other services/therapies, it appears you're likely better off posting your links and advertising on the escort sites such as Rentmen, M4RN (not the most referenced in major metropolitan areas like NYC) and/or Adam for Adam.

 

Obviously, only you know which ads on which sites drive your business the most, so you are the only one who can decide the best sites for your business. I am afraid that ad posting strictures like these on MassageM4M are going to get worse before they get better, especially if government entities (like Homeland Security shutting down Rentboy) continue to pursue these businesses.

 

TruHart1

[+ bigjoey]

Recently, in reading the posted reviews on MassageM4M site, one reviewer mentioned how beautiful the masseur looked nude. That was a tip off that nude massage was offered even though not in the ad part. Unless the guidelines apply to the review section, you could have a friendly client post a review that hints strongly at your style of massage and what is offered if not directly allowed.

 

Unfortunately, big government is forcing itself into more and more areas of our private lives (all done with "good" intensions).

[+ sync]

To adhere to the verbiage parameters designated within the above content policy, the advertiser would have to somehow mime the advertisement.

[+ Lance_Navarro]

Given the content of my masseurfinder ad I am actually surprised that my account hasn't been shut down as well. I don't tend to get much business off if it, except when I'm traveling, so it wouldn't be a terrible loss. I managed to get away with creating a "short Google" URL (similar to tinyurl) that links to my website. I tried to go in yesterday to change some minor things in my profile and it said that I can't have any links to other sites, so I cancelled the changes so that the URL will remain.

 

I'm really sorry Adam, it's a damn shame that such fear and absurd legalities are getting in the way of the beautiful and spiritual work that you're doing. Changes will be neccesary but you'll persevere because this IS what you are meant to do. Sending love & light!

[+ SimplyAdam]

Thanks, guys. I appreciate the moral support. I re-submitted the text and it seems the issue is that they only want us to mention massage. There's no room for individuality or nuance -

 

An increasing issue in the world at large, I'd say.

 

I've discontinued advertising with them, and it feels good. Liberating.

[+ Funguy]

Adam, just keep us all here on the Forum up to date on yourself, travels, news, etc.

 

I realize there are a great many people who have not even heard of Daddy but at least, for those of us who know who you are and what you do, we appreciate yor.

 

BTW - come on out to LA sometime!

[bobchitown]

It seems to me that there is a place for a site willing to take ads like those massagem4m and masseurfinder used to.

[chirob]

I've noticed over the last few says, certain masseurs main photos have been taken out. A square with a generic gray silhouette appears instead.

[corymonroe]

The rentboy effect is affecting everything that even remotely sniffs of sex for money. Now that the election is over, it's safe to expect that this affect is only going to get more serious, especially if Giuliani is going to play a role in the U.S. Government.

[+ beethoven]

Not only have gray silhouettes replaced photos, but more than half the photos show guys posing in shirts and slacks. They look more like fashion models than masseurs. Something's up! And, after last night's horrendous results, it's likely to get worse.

[+ Travis69]

No shirtless photos can be your main photo per their new rules.

[tennisjock]

Looks like more and more will use massuerfinder, men4rentnow and or adam4adam vs massagem4m. One thing I always disliked about this site was how they tend to have a few ..handful to a dozen of guys in cities like LA that you have to pay to see their private pics, they all have land lines and won't take texts and they have never returned one phone call inquiring about setting up a appointment at the massagem4m guy's choosing. I can see one or two flakes but 10 or more? Then management tries to confuse us by showing these ads we're recently updated or worse traveling. And still no return calls etc

[+ beethoven]

I just looked on the M4M site, and EVERY ad in New York -- and I assume other cities as well -- have NO shirtless photos! I cannot believe this prudery -- or perhaps I should say this fear. I wonder if Masseurfinder will follow with the same foolish regulations.

[+ saminseattle]

I cannot believe this prudery -- or perhaps I should say this fear.

 

Hmmm…perhaps the people who warned about the dangerous implications of the RB prosecution knew what they were talking about? Perhaps the community should have shown greater solidarity in RB's defense, recognizing that an attack on one was an attack on all? Well, it’s too late now, so people will need to creatively manage the new situation as best they can. Perhaps pictures could be provided via email or a personal webpage, after an initial contact from a prospective massage client?

[Mocha]

Backpage, Adam, M4RN all better alternatives. $200 is way too much to pay to be censored. When craigslist and Twitter allow users to be real-time gynecology experts for free.

 

Cheap and fairly lenient plus you can post website links. Low end responses can be avoided with a little screening and a highly professional site/ad.

[+ SimplyAdam]

At random, World Kindness Day is tomorrow, and - foremost - I thank you all for your kind counsel. The actual "customer service" response from both MasseurFinder and MassageM4M was cold, unfeeling, and dismissive - and the shock of it is now a thing of the past.

 

I look forward to a not-so-distant day when people don't encounter one another through ad spaces owned by misguided opportunists.

 

To us all waking up, and working out new ways to go about this uncertain era...

[corymonroe]

I look forward to a not-so-distant day when people don't encounter one another through ad spaces owned by misguided opportunists.

I don't think "misguided opportunist" tells the whole story. Web hosting, from what I know, is a regulated business. There are rules. Ask anyone who dabbles in the art of nude photography about the challenges of finding a safe and reliable hosting service. With a conservative government forming, you can count on a crackdown of anything remotely sounding like sex for money or someone's interpretation of indecency. It's just the way things are when the conservative party is in charge. They won't admit it but they are obsessed with sex.

[Hornplatz]

I just looked on the M4M site, and EVERY ad in New York -- and I assume other cities as well -- have NO shirtless photos! I cannot believe this prudery -- or perhaps I should say this fear. I wonder if Masseurfinder will follow with the same foolish regulations.

Recently I learned something about Masseur ads. If the picture is not shirtless, the Masseur does not give happy endings. This information came

from a Masseur when I asked him during our phone conversation if he will be naked. He said "no" and added the information about shirtless

vs. shirt.

[MikeBiDude]

Recently I learned something about Masseur ads. If the picture is not shirtless, the Masseur does not give happy endings. This information came

from a Masseur when I asked him during our phone conversation if he will be naked. He said "no" and added the information about shirtless

vs. shirt.

I would call that an *extreme* generalization...and not my experience