Would you rather overweight clients inform you about their expectations before meeting?

[marylander1940]

Would you rather overweight clients inform you about their expectations before meeting?

Edited May 9, 2017 by marylander1940

[seaboy4hire]

Weight doesn't bother me. But if there is a limit on what can be done say because of back issues then please give me a heads up.

 

Hugs,

Greg

[+ stevenkesslar]

Yes.

 

Here's one anecdote I can kind of remember from years ago. I showed up at a door of a client who was pretty seriously overweight. He explained to me that he realized at some point it made sense to tell escorts about his weight before they showed up at his door, because several times he had been rejected by escorts who showed up, took a look at him, and said the appointment was not going to work. In some ways I give credit to the escorts, who could have chosen to simply try to stay and rip him off without really providing what the client wanted.

 

To broaden the answer, here's another anecdote. I had a client who was in really good shape for his age - 70's - and liked to pride himself on looking like he was "young 60ish." Having said that, it seemed like he felt compelled to act like a 20-something sexually. He also told me that his expectations for long sessions of flip/flop anal sex so intimidated some well known escorts that they couldn't get erections around him and wouldn't let them hire him, usually after they had tried and failed to meet his expectations (at least by this client's account).

 

During this same period, I recall being hired by a client one night at his hotel who was overweight and could not get an erection due to surgery, but liked to be fucked. He said something like this to me at the start of the session: "Steven, I want you to know that I am not going to get an erection, and you are not going to see me have an orgasm, but I will really enjoy getting fucked by you." He was warm and fun and relaxing to be with, and it was a very fun appointment for me and I think him.

 

I recall thinking at the time that as I age, I hope I age as gracefully and with as much self-acceptance as the second client. And I felt sorry for the first client that he put enough expectations on himself that he often felt let down. And I do mean put expectations on himself, not the escort, because it seemed like at some deep level he really wanted to feel like he was much younger than he actually was.

[calrichmond]

Yes.

 

Here's one anecdote I can kind of remember from years ago. I showed up at a door of a client who was pretty seriously overweight. He explained to me that he realized at some point it made sense to tell escorts about his weight before they showed up at his door, because several times he had been rejected by escorts who showed up, took a look at him, and said the appointment was not going to work. In some ways I give credit to the escorts, who could have chosen to simply try to stay and rip him off without really providing what the client wanted.

 

To broaden the answer, here's another anecdote. I had a client who was in really good shape for his age - 70's - and liked to pride himself on looking like he was "young 60ish." Having said that, it seemed like he felt compelled to act like a 20-something sexually. He also told me that his expectations for long sessions of flip/flop anal sex so intimidated some well known escorts that they couldn't get erections around him and wouldn't let them hire him, usually after they had tried and failed to meet his expectations (at least by this client's account).

 

During this same period, I recall being hired by a client one night at his hotel who was overweight and could not get an erection due to surgery, but liked to be fucked. He said something like this to me at the start of the session: "Steven, I want you to know that I am not going to get an erection, and you are not going to see me have an orgasm, but I will really enjoy getting fucked by you." He was warm and fun and relaxing to be with, and it was a very fun appointment for me and I think him.

 

I recall thinking at the time that as I age, I hope I age as gracefully and with as much self-acceptance as the second client. And I felt sorry for the first client that he put enough expectations on himself that he often felt let down. And I do mean put expectations on himself, not the escort, because it seemed like at some deep level he really wanted to feel like he was much younger than he actually was.

You are definitely a professional.

[BaronArtz]

Would you rather overweight clients warn you about their size and expectations before meeting?

 

'warn' implies that it is a negative ... I would rather 'inform' than 'warn'.

[+ stevenkesslar]

You are definitely a professional.

 

Thanks. But here's a warning to all of you. I actually consider myself a whore.

[marylander1940]

'warn' implies that it is a negative ... I would rather 'inform' than 'warn'.

 

You're right, I'm sure some chubby chasers work as escorts too.

[JDXXX]

If your of an escort who enjoys what he does, and enjoys his time with his clients - it shouldn't matter if the client is overweight or not.

 

A "true and humble" escort doesn't and shouldn't discriminate over size, race, or creed of any kind.

Edited November 13, 2015 by JDXXX

[AdamSmith]

You are definitely a professional.

 

Thanks. But here's a warning to all of you. I actually consider myself a whore.

I, Claudius

 

Quintus Justus: Do you know what's going on at the new palace at this moment? The Emperor's wife is competing with a prostitute to see who can wear out the most men. Oh, they've been at it since noon!

http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTQ5Nzc1NzUwMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwNzY2MDU1MjE@._V1_SY317_CR104,0,214,317_AL_.jpg http://www.wearysloth.com/Gallery/ActorsH/tve8260-12-167.gif

 

Crowd: Galla's Hair!

 

Mnester: "The golden hair that Galla wears

Is hers. Who would have thought it?

She swears it's hers, and true she swears

For I know where she bought it!"

 

Messalina: Oh, come, Mnester.

 

Mnester: "You ask me how my farm can pay,

Since little it will bear.

It pays me thus - 'tis far away

And you are never there!"

 

Slave: The woman Scylla! The President of the Guild of Prostitutes!

 

Mnester: Sh! ... Permit me to introduce myself. My name is Mnester. I am an actor. Most people have heard of me.

 

Scylla: My name is Scylla and I'm a whore. Everybody's heard of me.

 

Mnester: Allow me to introduce you to the Lady Messalina. Your challenger, and the Emperor's wife. This is Scylla the Sicilian - and anybody's wife!

 

Scylla: I am honored.

 

Messalina: You are most welcome.

 

Scylla: They said you were beautiful, but their praise did you small justice.

 

Messalina: You are most generous. And it was sporting of you to accept the challenge.

 

Scylla: Sporting? I see. There's no money in it?

 

Mnester: You're here for the honor and to defend your reputation.

 

Scylla: Would you defend yours for nothing, Greek? Lady, I'm a professional; I work for money. The honor I gladly leave to you.

 

Mnester: What impudence! She expects to be paid, and in this company!

 

Scylla: The difference between you and me, actor, is you're a snob and I'm not. And the difference between this great lady and myself is that my work is her hobby. My hobby happens to be gardening, for which I don't expect to be paid.

 

Messalina: You shall have your money. Shall we say...?

 

Scylla: Five?

 

Messalina: Three gold pieces a head?

 

Scylla: "A head" seems an odd way to describe it. Win or lose, of course? That seems satisfactory.

 

Mnester: Satisfactory? You've never earned so much in a whole year.

 

Scylla: This Greek will drive me to distraction. Nothing I say pleases him.

 

Messalina: Let us begin. Which side of the bed do you prefer? Left or right?

 

Scylla: Lady, give me a support for my back and "Let the Games begin," as they say!

Edited November 13, 2015 by AdamSmith

[geminibear]

I, Claudius

 

Quintus Justus: Do you know what's going on at the new palace at this moment? The Emperor's wife is competing with a prostitute to see who can wear out the most men. Oh, they've been at it since noon!

http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTQ5Nzc1NzUwMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwNzY2MDU1MjE@._V1_SY317_CR104,0,214,317_AL_.jpg http://www.wearysloth.com/Gallery/ActorsH/tve8260-12-167.gif

 

Crowd: Galla's Hair!

 

Mnester: "The golden hair that Galla wears

Is hers. Who would have thought it?

She swears it's hers, and true she swears

For I know where she bought it!"

 

Messalina: Oh, come, Mnester.

 

Mnester: "You ask me how my farm can pay,

Since little it will bear.

It pays me thus - 'tis far away

And you are never there!"

 

Slave: The woman Scylla! The President of the Guild of Prostitutes!

 

Mnester: Sh! ... Permit me to introduce myself. My name is Mnester. I am an actor. Most people have heard of me.

 

Scylla: My name is Scylla and I'm a whore. Everybody's heard of me.

 

Mnester: Allow me to introduce you to the Lady Messalina. Your challenger, and the Emperor's wife. This is Scylla the Sicilian - and anybody's wife.

 

Scylla: I am honored.

 

Messalina: You are most welcome.

 

Scylla: They said you were beautiful, but their praise did you small justice.

 

Messalina: You are most generous. And it was sporting of you to accept the challenge.

 

Scylla: Sporting? I see. There's no money in it?

 

Mnester: You're here for the honor and to defend your reputation.

 

Scylla: Would you defend yours for nothing, Greek? Lady, I'm a professional I work for money. The honor I gladly leave to you.

 

Mnester: What impudence! She expects to be paid, and in this company!

 

Scylla: The difference between you and me, actor, is you're a snob and I'm not. And the difference between this great lady and myself is that my work is her hobby. My hobby happens to be gardening, for which I don't expect to be paid.

 

Messalina: You shall have your money. Shall we say...?

 

Scylla: Five?

 

Messalina: Three gold pieces a head?

 

Scylla: "A head" seems an odd way to describe it. Win or lose, of course? That seems satisfactory.

 

Mnester: Satisfactory? You've never earned so much in a whole year.

 

Scylla: This Greek will drive me to distraction. Nothing I say pleases him.

 

Messalina: Let us begin. Which side of the bed do you prefer? Left or right?

 

Scylla: Lady, give me a support for my back, and "Let the Games begin," as they say!

I not only get so much useful information from this forum but I also get culture. Shakespeare! I am cancelling my membership to Public Television.

[AdamSmith]

I not only get so much useful information from this forum but I also get culture. Shakespeare! I am cancelling my membership to Public Television.

 

If I ever give in to the dark side and create a sock puppet here...!

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.aoltv.com/media/2005/12/cooke_alistair_mpt_200x242.jpg

Edited November 13, 2015 by AdamSmith

[corndog]

I'm of the school that believes that the escort needn't be warned/informed. Two reasons:

 

1. As JD has pointed out, a quality, professional escort shouldn't care.

 

2. It is very difficult to tell an escort that you're overweight without coming across as having self confidence issues. I believe that while extra weight may be unattractive, low self confidence is 10 times more unattractive. If you walk into an escort appointment carrying yourself like you are the sexiest man alive, a good escort will pick up on that energy and roll with it. I'm not suggesting that you be cocky or arrogant, but just confident. On some level, I think we all expect an escort to do a little acting to make us feel sexier than perhaps we are; as clients, we can play the supporting role.

[JDXXX]

Thanks. But here's a warning to all of you. I actually consider myself a whore.

 

Being a whore is only what you make it out to be, baby as you are a noble professional at it. .

 

Of course, you know how to make being a wise whore fun and exciting, sexy. .

[OneFinger]

Would you rather overweight clients warn you about their size and expectations before meeting?

This is not an escort response but one from a client. I was obese for a long time and then lost 130 lbs in 2010. Before I lost the weight I would always tell the escort of my size so that wouldn't be surprised. Since the weight loss I always warn the escort that I've got serious sagging since I haven't had skin reduction surgery. I believe it best to be totally honest with the escort before booking an appointment.

[Juan Vancouver]

Would you rather overweight clients warn you about their size and expectations before meeting?

 

Yes.

 

Every time.

 

It's not whether I am a saint or not or whether a good escort should like everyone. It's not that I need to be "warned", I just need all necessary information.

 

When I say yes attraction has nothing to do with my answer. Yes, you should always share your expectations before meeting and yes, you should always share information about you that might hinder the fulfillment of those expectations.

 

There's tons of wonderfully fun things one can do with a lover who is even morbidly obese and clean, but because of simple physics there are things that are just not possible.

 

I was once hired by a guy who weighed possibly two and a half times my weight. He was really handsome and I thought the session was going well. At some point, after adjusting heights and angles, finally I was able to fuck him. As soon as I was inside him, he jerked at my arms frantically demanding that I lifted him with my dick and fucked him against the wall the way he had seen in a porn movie.

 

This is not an exaggeration. And as much as this case was extreme, it is quite common for people not in touch with their bodies to demand things are -because of the size and condition of their bodies- simply impossible.

 

You are three hundred pounds and you want me to lift you like you were a tiny young man? I am sorry, it sounds as if I am not the man for you. I don't think I can fulfill your expectation.

 

I will not go see someone who I think I might disappoint. If someone wants something that I am not confident I can provide, I will be clear about it and will suggest I am not the right man for the job. I will explain my point and I will offer options, but I will be very happy not to have brought into a situation where the only outcome is failure.

 

Now... let's not talk about me. Let's not talk about those other escorts who will be thrilled about seeing anyone. Let's talk about the other ones...

 

If I am insecure about the way I look, whether it is justified or not, if I feel ashamed that I am fat, for example and I show up at an escort's door just to have that escort close the door on my face because I am fat, or worse, have the escort take my money while he does absolutely nothing for me... that would make me so much unhappier and more insecure.

 

Why not give the escort every chance to reject me beforehand to avoid the much harsher possibility of being rejected in person or being taken for a ride?

 

ALWAYS GIVE THE NECESSARY INFORMATION. Not for your escort. For yourself.

 

You deserve to be treated well. You deserve to be treated with respect, and you deserve to have someone who understands your expectations clearly.

[+ stevenkesslar]

 

2. It is very difficult to tell an escort that you're overweight without coming across as having self confidence issues.

 

My actual experience for 15 years suggests the opposite.

 

The anecdote I already posted above says it all. It's just my perceptions, but what you are talking about here is basically whether you can disclose you are imperfect AND come off as self-confident. And you're right, self confidence is sexy.

 

In one case as I described above I felt like a client with a perfectly hard cock that functioned very well was desperate to cover up his lack of confidence in himself due to his age. In another case I felt like a client with a cock he himself described as nonfunctional (regarding erections) was full of self-confidence and fun and relaxing to be with. These were just my perceptions, but what we're talking about here are perceptions of sexiness. Clarity and confidence are not mutually exclusive things.

 

There's at least one poster on this site I have been hired repeatedly by who manages to combine what would clearly be considered an overweight body with a self-confident "that just means there's more of me for you to love, if I let you" attitude. I find that sexy, too.

[AdamSmith]

P.S. Of course in 'I, Claudius' the joke was that the strumpet empress Messalina outlasted the professional Scylla.

 

Mnester: Ah, then victory hath conceded thee! The Queen is dead ... Long live the Queen!

 

Messalina: Come back, you whore! We've not finished.

 

Scylla: She's inhuman! Her insides must be made out of old army boots! The money - where's my money?

 

Mnester: Here, Lady, here. Three gold pieces per head. Will you take 'em or shall I have 'em sent?

 

Scylla: I'll take it. Amateurs!

 

[down_to_business]

Would you rather overweight clients warn you about their size and expectations before meeting?

 

Of course they would, as they would "rather" know about anything to allow them to interject any prejudices they have without having to suffer any fallout or consequences for truth or bluntness in advertising that might turn potential clients off. It is my 100% belief that any escort that has a performance issue with a client for whatever reason, that burden of disclosure should 100% fall on the escort and not the client. That's right, put it in your ad. No gingers. No fatties. No baldies. No bears. No minorities. No whatever the hell you have a problem with. That's right, own it, wear your "preferences" as you like to call them as a badge of honor, and stop blaming the clients for your performance issues or forcing them to take ultra critical looks at themselves and develop as Mr. Corndog put so eloquently self-confidence issues just to make you feel better about your own prejudices aka "preferences". And you clients, do as Mr. Corndog says, walk in there and meet your escort, with your head held high, and full of self-confidence and hope you picked a winner like JD Daniels that is going to treat you like a king no matter what you look like! You owe THAT to yourself!

[rvwnsd]

I have recently started sharing my stats with escorts because I am very tall. Although I don't consider 6'4" to be freakishly unusual, many guys have had a surprised look and comment on my height when they open the door. I usually tell them that I will be shorter when I am on my back and we both laugh, but for some guys the height difference is a real issue. In terms of communicating expectations, it seems only fair to explain what you want when hiring. How else is the escort supposed to know what you are looking for?

[JDXXX]

Of course they would, as they would "rather" know about anything to allow them to interject any prejudices they have without having to suffer any fallout or consequences for truth or bluntness in advertising that might turn potential clients off. It is my 100% belief that any escort that has a performance issue with a client for whatever reason, that burden of disclosure should 100% fall on the escort and not the client. That's right, put it in your ad. No gingers. No fatties. No baldies. No bears. No minorities. No whatever the hell you have a problem with. That's right, own it, wear your "preferences" as you like to call them as a badge of honor, and stop blaming the clients for your performance issues or forcing them to take ultra critical looks at themselves and develop as Mr. Corndog put so eloquently self-confidence issues just to make you feel better about your own prejudices aka "preferences". And you clients, do as Mr. Corndog says, walk in there and meet your escort, with your head held high, and full of self-confidence and hope you picked a winner like JD Daniels that is going to treat you like a king no matter what you look like! You owe THAT to yourself!

 

You said it, baby. Right On, DTB.

 

DTB is right as I believe in treating all my guys like Kings, and enjoy my clients no matter what size, race, religion or creed.

 

Treat others as YOU would like to be treated. It's the only fair and "classy" thing to do of in "ANY" business. .

 

Own what you do as an escort, and be proud of yourself and your clients who helped build YOU to where you are as an escort today based on the joy and

pleasure you've brought into they're lives.

 

It's a great accomplishment, and honor for YOU as the escort to know you bring happiness and self-esteem to your client no matter of there size, looks, or even race.

 

We all need a great guy in our lives who makes us feel special in one way or another from time-to-time to help boost us up in life as we do live in a cruel, and sometimes "fake" society that's based on looks or how much money you have which isn't good for one's self-worth at times.

[Wolfer]

And what if the client doesn't have a lot of self-confidence? Mind, I take extra care to never be self-deprecating and I accept (never refuse) every compliment without ever fishing for one.

That doesn't take away, though, that I have almost zero sexual self-confidence and I subconsciously act like that, too. I don't carry myself very sexily nor take charge or know what to do.

[Wolfer]

Although I don't consider 6'4" to be freakishly unusual

I'm less tall than you are (just over 6') and I've noticed that all escorts I've hired have always been shorter than me, sometimes by quite a bit. I always forget that I'm a bit taller than the average person in Belgium.

It's almost become a desire to find a guy as tall or taller than me

[Juan Vancouver]

Of course they would, as they would "rather" know about anything to allow them to interject any prejudices they have without having to suffer any fallout or consequences for truth or bluntness in advertising that might turn potential clients off. It is my 100% belief that any escort that has a performance issue with a client for whatever reason, that burden of disclosure should 100% fall on the escort and not the client. That's right, put it in your ad. No gingers. No fatties. No baldies. No bears. No minorities. No whatever the hell you have a problem with. That's right, own it, wear your "preferences" as you like to call them as a badge of honor, and stop blaming the clients for your performance issues or forcing them to take ultra critical looks at themselves and develop as Mr. Corndog put so eloquently self-confidence issues just to make you feel better about your own prejudices aka "preferences". And you clients, do as Mr. Corndog says, walk in there and meet your escort, with your head held high, and full of self-confidence and hope you picked a winner like JD Daniels that is going to treat you like a king no matter what you look like! You owe THAT to yourself!

 

My man, respectfully, your reading comprehension skills are incredibly lacking. This is not an issue of the escorts' preferences, but of the emotional wellbeing of clients who might already have a tenuous self confidence.

 

Yes, by all means, if you are going to the mall, or a party or the office, hold your head as high as you can, celebrate who you are and give no explanations about your physical state.

 

If you are going to meet an escort, however, if you are going to put yourself in someone else's hands and be vulnerable, if you are planning to be in the incredibly dangerous position in which a prejudiced, dumb or inexperienced guy might actually bruise you instead of handle you with love and tenderness, then it is incredibly important that you weed out the bad ones before meeting as often as you can.

Going to meet an escort "hoping that you picked a winner that treats you like a king" is an abusive suggestion because you know there are not many out there. Leaving it to luck is a very self hating way to go about it. There is a much better way to know in advance if you picked a winner: let him know everything there is to know.

 

And the other part of the question... expectations. If you are one of those people who think escorts are sexbots who can and will do any sex trick for you every time, then I know you are also one of those men who are always disappointed. If someone tells me that I must cum once in his mouth, another time in his ass and another time on his chest, I will have to turn down the appointment. If someone tells me that he must absolutely enjoy anal sex, which has to this point been elusive, I will clearly manage his expectations and tell him that I cannot promise that. If a 400 pound person expects me to fuck carry him around the room like he saw in the movies, I will have to explain why this is not possible.

 

It's not a matter of preferences or performance, as you call it. It's simple physics.

 

Having good, loving intentions is completely different to selling "One syrup heals all" snake oil.

[down_to_business]

My man, respectfully, your reading comprehension skills are incredibly lacking. This is not an issue of the escorts' preferences, but of the emotional wellbeing of clients who might already have a tenuous self confidence.

 

Yes, by all means, if you are going to the mall, or a party or the office, hold your head as high as you can, celebrate who you are and give no explanations about your physical state.

 

If you are going to meet an escort, however, if you are going to put yourself in someone else's hands and be vulnerable, if you are planning to be in the incredibly dangerous position in which a prejudiced, dumb or inexperienced guy might actually bruise you instead of handle you with love and tenderness, then it is incredibly important that you weed out the bad ones before meeting as often as you can.

Going to meet an escort "hoping that you picked a winner that treats you like a king" is an abusive suggestion because you know there are not many out there. Leaving it to luck is a very self hating way to go about it. There is a much better way to know in advance if you picked a winner: let him know everything there is to know.

 

 

And the other part of the question... expectations. If you are one of those people who think escorts are sexbots who can and will do any sex trick for you every time, then I know you are also one of those men who are always disappointed. If someone tells me that I must cum once in his mouth, another time in his ass and another time on his chest, I will have to turn down the appointment. If someone tells me that he must absolutely enjoy anal sex, which has to this point been elusive, I will clearly manage his expectations and tell him that I cannot promise that. If a 400 pound person expects me to fuck carry him around the room like he saw in the movies, I will have to explain why this is not possible.

 

It's not a matter of preferences or performance, as you call it. It's simple physics.

 

Having good, loving intentions is completely different to selling "One syrup heals all" snake oil.

 

I so strongly disagree with you it hurts, but I am going to let it go after this final comment because we will never agree. To even hint I suggested what you did is such is pure fabrication.

 

I would never expect an escort to be able to perform wild acrobatics with a 500 pound man and if that was a requirement for a successful session with you, then by all means, it would be smart for anyone to disclose.

 

But if you think a 350 pound man should have to disclose his weight to you, or a bald man should have to disclose he has no hair to you, or that a red head needs to tell you he is a ginger, or etc. etc. needs to disclose this to you in hopes of getting a simple hug or kiss from you, you are not half the man or escort I EVER thought you to be and frankly I am just sickened thinking about it.

[Juan Vancouver]

But if you think a 350 pound man should have to disclose his weight to you, or a bald man should have to disclose he has no hair to you, or that a red head needs to tell you he is a ginger, or etc. etc. needs to disclose this to you in hopes of getting a simple hug or kiss from you, you are not half the man or escort I EVER thought you to be and frankly I am just sickened thinking about it.

 

I would learn a lot about myself if you show me where I wrote that I need any of those people to "warn" me in order to see them or not, to kiss them or not.

 

That is pure fabrication.

 

To me it sounds as if you are reacting to some other instance we don't know anything about, protecting it to my half digested post. No need to be sickened. You just need to read what I wrote.

 

Yes, give all information specially when it can possibly affect your expectations. (Like the case I mentioned).

 

Tell me about you and tell me about what you are hoping to experience.

 

Lastly, and this concerning clients, not me, personally, tell your escort -every single time- in case he is a dud and you can avoid him. If you are wanting to avoid a bad experience, disclose. It is in your own interest.

 

If this makes you feel sickened, then you are right, the conversation is over.

 

Wishing you many fulfilling, exciting encounters.