Is this cancellation believable?

[rvwnsd]

...Seriously, you guys think his little cold hit this smart, very well reviewed escort with a significant enough force to cancel between the confirmation at 90 minutes prior to meet up and when he cancelled at 20 minutes prior? So in that 70 minutes this great guy went from "excited to meet" to "I'm really getting sick"? ...

 

It is worth mentioning that the OP, not the escort, sent the confirmation text 90 minutes prior to the appointment. The escort texted back 20 minutes later and cancelled due to his sore throat and fever. Here's a quote:

 

Ninety minutes before he's supposed to arrive, I [the OP] text to say I'm looking forward to meeting him and will see him soon. Twenty minutes later I get a cancellation [from the escort] -- explanation of a sore throat and fever coming on -- with apology.

 

I would rather an escort (or anyone, for that matter) who thinks he is coming down with a cold or flu cancel an appointment rather than see me and either get me sick or deliver a lackluster appointment. As Bryan pointed out in the quote below

 

Without sounding "preachy" perhaps this is a golden rule opportunity: treat others as you would like to be treated....

 

Here's a question: If you felt a cold coming on during the afternoon of a playdate would you go through with the appointment or cancel?

[+ WilliamM]

In a situation like this, I would expect the escort to call me, if possible, and explain the situation rather than text or e-mail me.

 

I remember making an appointment with an escort and giving him my NYC hotel and room number. He called me about two hours before the appointment to tell me he had just flown in from the west coast and was more tired that expected. We had a long conversation. He let me make the decision. I called it off, but hired him the next time I was in the city and several other times as well. Nice, honest guy!

[Amoco]

Also stopped hiring guys on travel days as the combination of weather, flight schedules and their recent work schedules combine to create potential problems more often than not.

[BgMstr4u]

in general I find that people of all sorts fall into two camps when it comes to cancellations. Not just escorts, but people in general.

 

The first, by far the most numerous, cancel for legitimate reasons and that cancellation creates an obligation which ultimately benefits me. Honest people who have to cancel an appointment realize they have created an incovenience and will want to compensate in some way.

 

The second don't.

 

So IMHO the best strategy is to receive the news graciously and accept the compensating response when it comes. That can in fact create or deepen a relationship. If it doesn't come, well, there's your answer. The world is full if them and it's your turn. Just quietly take them off whatever list you hoped they would be on and move along.

 

It's also helpful to have an alternative, a Plan B, in mind. Just In Case!

[Phlmuscle]

I don't believe him, because the timing was bad. I think the question is would he even had cancelled if you had not called him first. Seems to me he wouldn't have showed up, and you prompted his call.

[Guest RexB]

I once booked an escort several days in advance here in NYC. A couple of hours before we were to meet I was shaving and cut my face very badly near my mouth and it wouldn't stop bleeding. What I was going to do with him involved my mouth/face so any friction on it would have been out of the question. I texted him and told him what had happened and he seemed cool with it. I immediately rescheduled for a couple of days later. A few hours before we were supposed to meet in Manhattan I texted him to confirm and didn't hear back from him for a long time. Finally, about half an hour before meeting time he wrote saying, "I'm on Fire Island".

I asked him, "Were you even going to let me know?", and the last communication we ever had was when he replied, "Of course!"

When before? 15 minutes before? 10 minutes? 5 minutes? I might be wrong but it sure seemed like some kind of passive aggressive payback for me canceling.

[Guest]

So, I've been emailing back and forth for a week with a very well reviewed guy, and everything is set and ready to go. Ninety minutes before he's supposed to arrive, I text to say I'm looking forward to meeting him and will see him soon. Twenty minutes later I get a cancellation -- explanation of a sore throat and fever coming on -- with apology. Is this to be believed? Just over an hour in advance? Or...?

The part that makes this story particularly problematic is the fact that he didn't respond with any promptness to the text. Yes, he could have recently become ill, but he should have notified you promptly, having been aware of the appointment, presumably. Waiting until an hour before is rude at best.

[+ purplekow]

I was working one day and felt great. When I opened the door to the office i felt great. By the time I reached the chair, I had to sit down. I cancelled the rest of the day. Just a simple strep throat with a fever spike to 102.5. Enough to ground me. I have not missed a day of work due to illness in 27 years. If I was home, I would not have gone in. Did this escort get that sick that fast? The escort is the only one who knows for sure and likely he will be taking that secret with him, but it is possible, Believe him or not, believe this, you are not getting laid by him.

[Kenny]

Finally I've gotten a pretty good sense that the excuse for cancellation was made up.

 

The day after, I texted to say I hoped he was feeling better. A while later, he replied: I'm fine. Apparently a bug going around, he said; he thought it was probably something he ate and got a case of food poisoning. I'm no doctor, of course, but rarely if ever is food poisoning a cause of sore throat [!], unless a long stretch of violent vomiting and deep infection over several days is involved [!!]. Sore throat and fever was his professed cancellation reason -- or, I should say, made-up excuse [!!!].

[sincitymix]

Finally I've gotten a pretty good sense that the excuse for cancellation was made up.

 

The day after, I texted to say I hoped he was feeling better. A while later, he replied: I'm fine. Apparently a bug going around, he said; he thought it was probably something he ate and got a case of food poisoning. I'm no doctor, of course, but rarely if ever is food poisoning a cause of sore throat [!], unless a long stretch of violent vomiting and deep infection over several days is involved [!!]. Sore throat and fever was his professed cancellation reason -- or, I should say, made-up excuse [!!!].

 

Or he could not remember which excuse/lie he had given you.

[+ purplekow]

Well you what they say: Bad liar; Bad lay.

[rguer]

I'm no doctor, of course, but rarely if ever is food poisoning a cause of sore throat [!], unless a long stretch of violent vomiting and deep infection over several days is involved [!!]. Sore throat and fever was his professed cancellation reason -- or, I should say, made-up excuse [!!!].

 

I once had a severe case of gastroenteritis whose prodrome was chest pain. I wouldn't rule out the possibility of the sore throat being an early and unusual symptom.

 

But I also wouldn't think it's likely.

[+ Funguy]

I had a very well-respected and reviewed escort cancel 10 minutes prior to the meet just as I was parking my car. Reason: kidney stone.

Did i believe him? Given who he was and the stellar things written about him, including personality, I chose to believe him. He said it has happened before and comes on suddenly. Having had kidney stones myself I know you can be fine one minute and in agony the next.

Unfortunately, my schedule did not permit a reschedule until the next week but he was leaving town by then.

[Guest]

Finally I've gotten a pretty good sense that the excuse for cancellation was made up.

 

The day after, I texted to say I hoped he was feeling better. A while later, he replied: I'm fine. Apparently a bug going around, he said; he thought it was probably something he ate and got a case of food poisoning. I'm no doctor, of course, but rarely if ever is food poisoning a cause of sore throat [!], unless a long stretch of violent vomiting and deep infection over several days is involved [!!]. Sore throat and fever was his professed cancellation reason -- or, I should say, made-up excuse [!!!].

Yes, you're right. Food poisoning causes neither a sore throat nor a fever. It's caused by the ingestion of a toxin; it's not an infection itself. Compounding a lie with another lie....

[Guest RexB]

For me this conversation brings up communication in general. For me the communication with an escort that potentially leads up to meeting him is very important and I usually use my intuition based largely on how communicative he is, no matter how much I'm hot for him. In a sexual setting I'm very verbal but sometimes I want to be talked dirty to. (Too bad for me that nobody does it as good as I do. Ha Ha!). Sometimes I put up with and hire the strictly-one-word-reply-guys but the times that I have not followed my own evaluation of communication as such a premium commodity have been the only times I've had less-than-satisfactory experiences with escorts.

Another thing I want to add is that very often the times that I really wanted a meet-up to occur and it didn't I used to feel like something had gone wrong. But I've noticed that the times that weren't completely enjoyable were the ones where the pre-meet-up communication didn't flow freely, i.e., one-word-replies. And as for the ones that I thought were to be but didn't happen I very often find out that nothing happening was "wrong", but was actually very "right". I've never been so aware of how many scammers and frauds there actually were until I came on here a month or so ago. Out of the forty or so guys that I've met in the past 3 years there was only one that I met who was a scammer. It was also the only time I felt so close to physical violence and I didn't like it.

 

All I can say is "Give what you want to get".

[+ Gar1eth]

Actually

Yes, you're right. Food poisoning causes neither a sore throat nor a fever. It's caused by the ingestion of a toxin; it's not an infection itself. Compounding a lie with another lie....

Actually depending on the toxin, it might be able to cause a fever- as the body's reaction to the inflammation caused by the toxin. But I'll admit that sore throat would most likely be a long shot.

 

Gman

[big-n-tall]

Yes, you're right. Food poisoning causes neither a sore throat nor a fever. It's caused by the ingestion of a toxin; it's not an infection itself. Compounding a lie with another lie....

 

I'm not sure about the sore throat, but Gman is correct about the fever part. I got food poisoning (don't remember the bacteria name offhand) that just started out of nowhere. I was at work at the time when suddenly I got an extreme chill. My finger tips began to turn blue and I got very nauseated in the span of 10 minutes. When I got home I had extreme temperature shifts and flu like symptoms. I had a high tempature but I felt like I was freezing. The total time I went from blue fingers to shivering on my coach was less than 40 minutes. I won't even get to what was going on in the bathroom. Lol!

 

I eventually had to go the hospital a number times (1st time they couldn't figure exactly what was wrong with me). I went back for severe dehydration and After many varied tests, it was determined I had food poisoning.

 

But back to the topic at hand... If you feel the guy was lying to you and it's something that you can't get pass, move on.

If you were to meet the guy, you'd probably be thinking about this situation while you're with him. That would not be fun, I'm sure.