Calming a newbie's nerves?

[axl21v]

Hi guys,

 

First of all I'm grateful that this site exists and thank you for all your advice! I'll be reading the forums closely, but I am brand new to hiring so I had a few questions I'm hoping you can help me with:

 

What types of things do escorts do to calm nervous newbies? Should I even mention that I'm new to this during initial contact?

 

I'm jittery about this for several reasons, I guess the most important of these being that I'm not sure if my age will matter (just turned 30) or the fact that I'm also worried about my guy not being attracted to me/can't get and stay hard. I'm completely submissive and having him cum is a very important part of the experience for me. I know that nothing is assured... I suppose I could just ask any potential guys if them cumming would be okay, but I don't want to seem demanding at all when we discuss things.

 

I'm just one of those guys who actually prefers not to cum myself and who is gratified from "taking care of my man to completion" if you will. How can I best approach this?

[+ azdr0710]

only pick one or a few of the very well-reviewed (and experienced) guys here at Daddy's who you're attracted to.....

 

.....and tell him everything you just told us

[RadioRob]

I'm not an escort, but I'll give some advice based on my own experiences...

 

1.) COMMUNICATE! Be up front with your escort that you are new to hiring and a bit on edge. Share what you like and dislike. Talk about your ideal situation. If they know what you like, they can help make sure you have a great time.

2.) RESEARCH until you find the right person who fits your personality and turns you on.

3.) RELAX and HAVE FUN!

[sincitymix]

Hi guys,

 

First of all I'm grateful that this site exists and thank you for all your advice! I'll be reading the forums closely, but I am brand new to hiring so I had a few questions I'm hoping you can help me with:

 

What types of things do escorts do to calm nervous newbies? Should I even mention that I'm new to this during initial contact?

 

I'm jittery about this for several reasons, I guess the most important of these being that I'm not sure if my age will matter (just turned 30) or the fact that I'm also worried about my guy not being attracted to me/can't get and stay hard. I'm completely submissive and having him cum is a very important part of the experience for me. I know that nothing is assured... I suppose I could just ask any potential guys if them cumming would be okay, but I don't want to seem demanding at all when we discuss things.

 

I'm just one of those guys who actually prefers not to cum myself and who is gratified from "taking care of my man to completion" if you will. How can I best approach this?

 

Hmm are you sure you are not me?

Im pretty much into the same thing. Communication is def. the key. Tell the escort what you want, they will either say yes or no. I make sure the escort knows I need them to be the dominant alpha male, make the first move etc type of guy.

[+ azdr0710]

yes, communication is the most important thing.....

 

but I want to make the common reminder to keep any "sex talk" well away from money talk.....in one email or text, you may want to say what interests you and ask the escort if that sounds ok....then, in a later email, ask only what his rate is for time only.....also, you may want to remind the escort that you'll pay at the end of the meet and that you do not want to talk money at all during the meet

[+ purplekow]

Welcome to the board. To reiterate, communication is key. Being young is not a disadvantage as long as your money is old. You definitely need to tell the escort that it will be an unsuccessful visit unless he comes and that you will take your satisfaction into your own hands.

 

I would also suggest, Relax. This is supposed to be enjoyable. Relaxing. Invigorating. I would say rejuvenating but at 30, you are already "juvenated"

 

I find sucking on something sweet helps calm my nerves, so perhaps some Werther's or a butterscotch or perhaps you might have an idea of something sweet to suck.

 

My final suggestion is this, everyone on this board had a first time. First time hire, first time hired. Some of us have had both. If the experience is great, treasure it and build from thesr. If the experience is less than great, then move on with cherry popped and head held high and get yourself another fellow to do you right.

[axl21v]

You guys are amazing, I can't thank you enough! Just reading your responses made me feel much more at ease with thinking about doing this. I've been doing a lot of research about different guys in the area (I'm in L.A.), and I've definitely seen many hot men! I'll be sure to communicate my needs and go with the flow... and discuss the rate for his time appropriately since his time is what I'd be paying for. Also, great idea for sucking on something sweet--a bit of candy probably would help to distract my brain! I got out of a LTR not too long ago and just need some companionship.... being a shy guy like me makes it hard to go into the scene and meet people. But I will look at this a fun and not scary experience, and my hope is that I will remember it with a smile on my face!

[TruHart1]

Hi guys,

 

First of all...etc.

 

I'm jittery about this for several reasons, I guess the most important of these being that I'm not sure if my age will matter (just turned 30) or the fact that I'm also worried about my guy not being attracted to me/can't get and stay hard...etc.

 

... How can I best approach this?

 

First of all. welcome to this forum community! Even though no escorts have posted yet, trust all the great advice given on this thread by these excellent forum members who were once first time clients (like PK said) just as you will be, axl! Most of all, once you have made a thorough enough investigation into an escort to satisfy yourself that he is the one you want to hire, set aside any fears that you will not be attractive to the escort or that he will be unable to get/stay hard! The best escorts in the business are great because they don't fail to satisfy their clients. These fine escorts will not have any problems getting and staying hard with you.

 

Also, feel free to ask about specific guys you are interested in here and many of us who have met a particular escort will be happy to tell you how their experience with him was, either publically or privately via PM.

 

Oh, ...and let us know how your first hire goes.

 

TruHart1

[+ newatthis]

...I've been doing a lot of research about different guys in the area (I'm in L.A.)...

Welcome to the board!

 

In LA you have a lot of guys to choose from. Danny Cruz might be what you're looking for: http://itsdannycruz.com/

[axl21v]

Thanks guys!! I'll look up Danny. I've been reading some of the reviews, they've been so helpful! I saw yesterday that Tommy Defendi is in town and I love him haha. I was also looking at Matthew James and but I think he might have moved to Vegas... I guess that's a conversation for the Deli forum. I appreciate all and any more suggestions for a newbie like me! Feel free to PM me

[+ purplekow]

Thanks guys!! I'll look up Danny. I've been reading some of the reviews, they've been so helpful! I saw yesterday that Tommy Defendi is in town and I love him haha. I was also looking at Matthew James and but I think he might have moved to Vegas... I guess that's a conversation for the Deli forum. I appreciate all and any more suggestions for a newbie like me! Feel free to PM me

If we are making LA suggestions, Alec Andrews is a veritable fountain of ... He is a beautiful man inside and out and of course by inside and out I mean inside you or outside you.

[AresEscortNYC]

I may be the 1st escort to reply to your post, but there's not much to add to all the excellent advice youve allready been given. The only thing I'm thinking hasn't been mentioned is since you'll be more than disappointed if he doesn't cum, make the appt. a day or 2 in advance. That way the escort will think twice before, say, jacking off twice some morning if he knows he's seeing you that afternoon

[Zman]

I can remember well my nerves when I first started to hire. I was quite inexperienced and nervous. Communicating my situation worked out well. I found a sympathetic escort who helped me get comfortable. He also helped me developed some skills and talents I've been putting to good use ever since .

[axl21v]

If we are making LA suggestions, Alec Andrews is a veritable fountain of ... He is a beautiful man inside and out and of course by inside and out I mean inside you or outside you.

 

I was actually looking into him... he is definitely delicious looking. I was also reading up about his old partner in crime, Ryan I think? He's so sexy too.

[axl21v]

I may be the 1st escort to reply to your post, but there's not much to add to all the excellent advice youve allready been given. The only thing I'm thinking hasn't been mentioned is since you'll be more than disappointed if he doesn't cum, make the appt. a day or 2 in advance. That way the escort will think twice before, say, jacking off twice some morning if he knows he's seeing you that afternoon

Great advice! I'll be sure to give him plenty of time Thank you

[axl21v]

I can remember well my nerves when I first started to hire. I was quite inexperienced and nervous. Communicating my situation worked out well. I found a sympathetic escort who helped me get comfortable. He also helped me developed some skills and talents I've been putting to good use ever since .

Awesome Zman! That's what I'm hoping for... to help bring me out of my shell a bit. I feel like I've always had a bunch of hangups about sex... I need to learn to take the good and not so good, learn what I like to do, and go with the flow within my comfort zone.

[Zman]

Good luck Axl! Be patient. Be selective. It sounds like you are giving this some thought so I hope you end up with a good first experience.

[+ purplekow]

Awesome Zman! That's what I'm hoping for... to help bring me out of my shell a bit. I feel like I've always had a bunch of hangups about sex... I need to learn to take the good and not so good, learn what I like to do, and go with the flow within my comfort zone.

First step: Find comfort zone. Second Step: Push the boundaries of the comfort zone. Third step: Blow up the fucking comfort zone and have a life altering experience. Fourth step: Repeat

[rvwnsd]

Hi guys,

 

First of all I'm grateful that this site exists and thank you for all your advice! I'll be reading the forums closely, but I am brand new to hiring so I had a few questions I'm hoping you can help me with:

 

What types of things do escorts do to calm nervous newbies? Should I even mention that I'm new to this during initial contact?

 

YES!!!!!!! Definitely mention you have not hired before and that you might be nervous and need the escort to help calm you. As so many others have stated, communication is very, very important.

 

I'm jittery about this for several reasons, I guess the most important of these being that I'm not sure if my age will matter (just turned 30) or the fact that I'm also worried about my guy not being attracted to me/can't get and stay hard. I'm completely submissive and having him cum is a very important part of the experience for me. I know that nothing is assured... I suppose I could just ask any potential guys if them cumming would be okay, but I don't want to seem demanding at all when we discuss things.

 

There is a world of difference between stating your desires and being demanding. To illustrate:

 

Stating your desires:

 

"Hey, I saw your ad and think we might be a match. I really enjoy being completely submissive, sucking, getting fucked, and I'm absolutely driven wild when a man cums. Can't tell you enough how great that makes me feel. Sound like something you could get into?"

 

Being demanding:

 

"If we get together, I expect to suck your cock, get fucked, and completely submit to you. And everyone I meet up with cums. Hate it when a guy doesn't cum."

 

I'm just one of those guys who actually prefers not to cum myself and who is gratified from "taking care of my man to completion" if you will. How can I best approach this?

 

The best way to approach this is to do exactly as you have done here. Be a gentleman and ask for what you want. If you contact a guy and he doesn't seem like a match, politely decline and contact someone else.

[+ quoththeraven]

I'd also say that timing your appointment may be key. I know from this forum, talking to escorts, and personal experience that many of these guys need to work at coming. That can be the downside of their ability to get and stay hard for long periods of time. So being the last appointment of the day (or night) maybe important. Or you may have to look for someone who comes more easily or more frequently than what I've experienced.

 

On a slightly related topic, I'm fascinated by escorts' ability to fuck without coming, then blithely go out to dinner or whatever, presumably without a raging boner. I will forevermore sideeye claims that a guy absolutely must get off or he will suffer blue balls.

[Becket]

So "axl21v", have you taken the plunge yet? Not fair to tease us with all this foreplay then roll over and go to bed. lol. We need a full report! Who? What? How? When? Where? Where else? And Where Else Again? cheers

[MikeCruiseNYC]

Definitely call up Danny Cruz! He's easy to make an appointment with, very chill yet passionate guy and will likely cum until you beg him to stop! Just kidding! But seriously, he's just an awesome guy and will make you feel very comfortable from the get-go.

You could also try looking at your "nervousness" as just a heightened version of "excited and a little sexually frustrated". That's really all it is. So in that vein I love purplekow's advice of "Blow up the fucking comfort zone and have a life altering experience." then Repeat.

The Dr. prescribes a good dose of Danny Cruz. And tell us how it goes!

[Rudynate]

 

On a slightly related topic, I'm fascinated by escorts' ability to fuck without coming, then blithely go out to dinner or whatever, presumably without a raging boner. I will forevermore sideeye claims that a guy absolutely must get off or he will suffer blue balls.

 

I suspect it would very energizing - an interesting discipline, getting aroused time and again without coming.

[axl21v]

OK guys, appointments have been scheduled... I've taken all of your advice and it has made all the difference. I won't go further yet because I don't want to jinx it (yeah, I'm superstitious lol), but I'm definitely excited. I PROMISE to report back on Saturday Wish me luck!

[+ azdr0710]

Wish me luck!

 

 

no luck needed.....only skill!!