Hotter than they think?

[+ purplekow]

Two questions:

 

Escorts: Do you think that most clients view themselves as more hot, less hot or appropriately hot than you view them.

Clients: Do you think that most escorts think they are more hot, less hot or appropriately hot compared to your viewpoint.

 

For me, most the escorts I hire seem to believe they are less hot than they are. They see the flaws, i see the ceiling.

[TruHart1]

Two questions:

 

Escorts: Do you think that most patient's view themselves as more hot, less hot or appropriately hot than you view them.

Clients: Do you think that most escorts think they are more hot, less hot or appropriately hot compared to your viewpoint.

 

For me, most the escorts I hire seem to believe they are less hot than they are. They see the flaws, i see the ceiling.

 

Patients? PK?

 

TruHart1

[+ purplekow]

Thanks corrected that. I was a bit impatient there.

[sincitymix]

Patients? PK?

 

TruHart1

 

I think pateints was a good word I am in critical need of some medicine that only an escort can provide

[TruHart1]

I think pateints was a good word I am in critical need of some medicine that only an escort can provide

 

Well when you put it that way, I think many clients feel like they'd enjoy being probed no matter what their escorts perceptions of them are!

 

TruHart1

[rvwnsd]

I find most escorts are hotter than they think they are.

[+ purplekow]

I raised this question as Davewr posted that he felt sorry for escorts having to have sex with him. Another poster later commented that he thought Davewr quite attractive when they met in Palm Springs. I think most clients have rather low self esteem regarding their appearance and that most clients are actually more attractive than they will admit to themselves. I think the same is true of escorts, most of who are clearly quite handsome, yet seem not to recognize how handsome they are, I was wondering whether others shared this opinion.

[+ Gar1eth]

I have external proof of not being hot. I mean I'm not a Medusa, and thankfully the scar from the removal of that third eye in the middle of my forehead is almost completely healed now. Additionally it's been at least a few weeks since a small animal backed himself into a corner quivering in fear at my appearance. But that is as much as I can claim.

 

Gman

[corndog]

One of most valuable lessons I've learned from really hot guys is that almost everyone has self-esteem issues. When I talk to drop-dead gorgeous men who still see themselves as imperfect, it makes me realize that, I too, am probably too hard on myself. And, that no amount of time in the gym will solve self-esteem issues which are essentially internal.

 

On the other hand, I sometimes see escorts or dancers and ask myself "Where did they get the idea that someone would pay for that?"

[sincitymix]

I have external proof of not being hot. I mean I'm not a Medusa, and thankfully the scar from the removal of that third eye in the middle of my forehead is almost completely healed now. Additionally it's been at least a few weeks since a small animal backed himself into a corner quivering in fear at my appearance. But that is as much as I can claim.

 

Gman

 

LOl

[Juan Vancouver]

I think most clients have rather low self esteem regarding their appearance and that most clients are actually more attractive than they will admit to themselves. I think the same is true of escorts, most of who are clearly quite handsome, yet seem not to recognize how handsome they are, I was wondering whether others shared this opinion.

 

I think it does boil down to most people having low self esteem or to be more accurate we all have great difficulty objectively quantifying our gifts and faults. This however shows in two entirely different ways but I believe it all comes from a sense of insecurity.

 

The most evident one is the self deprecating way. People will always think they are infinitely uglier, fatter, dumber, ______er than they actually are and will have a lot of trouble accepting a compliment even when it is an honest one. This is specially true in certain cultures where the only way to answer to a compliment is a backhanded insult. I have been called a liar by a former client when I told him that I actually thought he had a nice dick and it felt really good inside me. He got quite violent and called me all sorts of names. (It was and it did. He will never know it. What a waste of a perfectly good dick!)

 

There's no winning.

 

The other way in which this manifests is the people who are entirely unable to see their faults. They describe themselves as ripped bodybuilder fashion magazine model when in reality they are might not entirely embody this physical ideal. This happens both with escorts and clients alike.

 

I have known very few people aware of their own gifts and shortcomings and peacefully accepting of them. In my experience, this kind of acceptance and self knowledge translates into an intoxicating self assurance that is kind, relaxed and has nothing to prove. I have found this self assurance in men that were considered classically beautiful and also in men that would not.

 

In my opinion, there is nothing hotter than this self knowledge and self acceptance.

[big-n-tall]

Am I some Adonis... No. But I'm far from ugly. I think I'm rather handsome (when I'm a bit scruffy) and cute (when I'm clean shaven). Most people I've met think I'm at least cute and I've only had one girl in high school call me ugly. Honestly she wasn't cute either. Lol! I've always been rather shy, but not because of my looks.

 

I have met escorts who know they're hot, but don't act like it around me, at least. Thankfully the vast majority of the escorts I've encountered are down to earth.

 

And I'll echo what has been posted... Some of these good looking guys have esteem issues just like everyone else and don't see themselves as attractive as others may find them.

[Guest Starbuck]

This is an interesting thread, especially if you pay attention to PK's original wording ... it's HOT, not HANDSOME, that we are being asked about. To my mind, HOT is inherently more interesting than plain old HANDSOME; it's multi-faceted as opposed to superficial.

 

If HOTNESS is the standard, I have not often encountered a working guy who doesn't qualify. (Maybe just once when I was startled by the appearance of a well-reviewed escort ... I hadn't seen a face pic in advance and ... yikes; and his cock was a little ... weird; and his manner was ... overwrought.) I don't have a specific "type," and don't always want the same sort of experience. I have chosen carefully, attuned to my mood of the moment, and have enjoyed many varieties of HOTNESS ... bodybuilder HOTNESS, innate self-confidence HOTNESS, oodles of charisma HOTNESS, excellent lover HOTNESS, leather master HOTNESS, even vulnerability HOTNESS -- because it can be very sweet and sexy when someone who is a professional sex worker doubts his own HOTNESS. If not all of these guys appreciate their own hotness, that's vulnerability HOTNESS, which is its own special magic.

 

As to clients ... as to ME ... well, despite having dropped 100 pounds, become a sensible eater and a regular gym-goer since I started hiring (I AM FOREVER GRATEFUL TO THE FIRST GUY I HIRED when I was a big fatso and he, emphasizing the positive, told me I was a great kisser ... thank you, Rick ... you know who you are), the best I'll say for myself is that there was a time, back in my 20s, when I thought I might be hot ... hot-ish ... a little hot. But we live in an ageist society and even if you flatter yourself with the notion that you look better than a lot of other 60-year-olds (and present yourself in a friendly, clean, respectful manner), it's hard to work up too much faith in your own sexual attractiveness.

 

On the other hand, last Spring I met (and hopped in to bed with) another client (a friend from this Forum) who is 10 years older than me and I can testify to the fact that HE is way hotter than he thinks he is. We should all have faces as good-looking, bodies as fit and cocks as hard at age 70.

[+ Gar1eth]

While I made light of my appearance in my 1st post, I am telling the truth. I'm neither hot nor handsome. As I said- I have some external verification- when I've been to gay clubs- no one has ever-ever tried to pick me up. And two weeks ago, I deleted all my gay social apps. They were getting all dusty and cobwebby from lack of use as no one ever texted me.

 

As the Good Book says- 'Verily, it is easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than it is for a hot/attractive gay man to know what being gay is like for those of us who aren't.'

 

Gman

[+ purplekow]

On the other hand, last Spring I met (and hopped in to bed with) another client (a friend from this Forum) who is 10 years older than me and I can testify to the fact that HE is way hotter than he thinks he is. We should all have faces as good-looking, bodies as fit and cocks as hard at age 70.

PM me whoever you are. I want your secrets and then I want you.

[Epigonos]

These questions are next to impossible to answer. The problem is that there are so many variables.

 

Question 1

 

Self-esteem isn’t a problem for me, though I frankly I hate the term, however, I have tons of it. More important in my mind is self-respect. Now I’m 74 and I dropped the word “hot” from my vocabulary, when describing myself, a number of years ago. The one thing my mirrors don’t do is lie.

 

Question 2

 

What constitutes being “hot” with regards to an escort either in his mind or in mine? His body, his face, his cock, his personality etc., etc. – who the hell knows? I’ve been hiring escorts for years and don’t really think in terms of him being “hot”. In the first place I wouldn’t hire him if I didn’t find him physically appealing and secondly I wouldn’t rehire him if I didn’t find his personality appealing. Is “hot” the same as appealing; I sure as hell don’t know.

[Rudynate]

I raised this question as Davewr posted that he felt sorry for escorts having to have sex with him. Another poster later commented that he thought Davewr quite attractive when they met in Palm Springs. I think most clients have rather low self esteem regarding their appearance and that most clients are actually more attractive than they will admit to themselves. I think the same is true of escorts, most of who are clearly quite handsome, yet seem not to recognize how handsome they are, I was wondering whether others shared this opinion.

 

They are making their living on their looks, so of course they have an awareness of their looks. Being aware of one's own looks doesn't, however, automatically translate to a high level of self esteem. So we can conclude that thinking well of one's self is more complicated than just being beautiful.