The 'dreaded' email

[down_to_business]

Got the following email from an escort I once considered hiring. It was sent to everyone in his 'database' and even though I never hired him, it sure freaked me out a little bit. Any name reference has been removed to his escort name and he does not escort any more. I try to be safe with every escort I am with (always condoms for anal etc but I have enjoyed performing oral sex in the past without a condom). It sure makes one rethink everything. Email posted below is unedited except as noted above.

 

 

**************

Hi all,

 

 

 

 

 

Escort X Here,

 

 

 

I am sending this to my entire client base. I am officially retired, i found out I am HIV positive, and I was positive during my entire time working. If we had unsafe times together, please get tested. Do not reply to this email, as I will be deleting my account soon anyway. I am out of the business, and I am sorry if you were put at risk because of my actions. I have been hiv positive since 2008 at least, according to the doctors, so like I said, if you ever booked with me get tested.

 

 

 

Peace,

 

 

 

Escort X

 

***************************

 

Have you ever gotten an email like this before? Thoughts??

[tyro]

No, I've never received an email like this, but a very well-known and well-loved escort barebacked me doggy-style without my permission. I have been tested twice since then (and come up negative for everything, thank all deities) but it has produced a lot of unnecessary anxiety. Please, everybody, be as smart and as safe as humanly possible. Please.

T

[+ azdr0710]

Hey DTB....

 

I'm pretty certain that is the very same email I got from somebody I met with a few times....but I got it well over a year or two ago and I'll bet others here in the forum got this, too.....we never did anything remotely risky and I've been tested a few times since and am negative....I wouldn't worry that you're in his database as I'm sure he just had you down as having made a contact via his escort address.....

 

he is a fine guy and I was sorry to hear his news....he certainly did the noble thing to notify all and I hope he is coping and doing well.....yes, of course he should've known/checked his status before going into the escort business.....

[Irtwo]

How can the doctors tell how long he has been positive?

[doitb4ugo]

Having had to send this type of email to all the people who I had sex with after being diagnosed I fully understand the trepedation of receiving something like this....bit being the client made it a bit easier....in all cases I had only safer sex and having at that time only played with professionals they are tested regularly and no harm was caused (to my knowledge).

As safe as we all want to be, there are no guarantees.

[Walker1]

Well, it is nice that he sent the email. He could have just slunk off, without notifying anybody. I just treat anyone as if they are infected, for penetrative sex. oral alone I don't take precaution-some say that is a risk too-but not from what I read so far.

[+ purplekow]

While he probably has done as much as he could do letting people know, he can not be sure his e mail was opened by all to whom it was sent.

is there any reason why you would not mention this escort by name? He is retired and he is informing all the clients he is able to reach. Why keep his name a secret? There may be some members here who have had contact with this person and who are unaware of his status.

I know of one escort with whom I had two encounters who subsequently nay have tested positive. i do not know if he informed his client base and as he did not inform me of his status directly, so I do not feel that I can truthfully pass on this information.

 

Of course, one should not wait for a warning to be tested. Getting tested regularly should be done by all sexually active people.

[calrichmond]

Years ago, before the internet really took off, I got crabs (pubic lice) from an escort. That's not particularly difficult to take care of, though. The same shampoo you use for lice kills pubic lice. I did contact him to let him know, and he was pretty obnoxious about it.

[JT Brooklyn]

Partying without the Hat

 

IF you are Sexually Active and choose not to use Condoms Good Luck to You!

[dcman]

Please check your PM.

Thanks.

[jimboivyo]

While he probably has done as much as he could do letting people know, he can not be sure his e mail was opened by all to whom it was sent.

is there any reason why you would not mention this escort by name? He is retired and he is informing all the clients he is able to reach. Why keep his name a secret? There may be some members here who have had contact with this person and who are unaware of his status.

I know of one escort with whom I had two encounters who subsequently nay have tested positive. i do not know if he informed his client base and as he did not inform me of his status directly, so I do not feel that I can truthfully pass on this information.

 

Of course, one should not wait for a warning to be tested. Getting tested regularly should be done by all sexually active people.

 

agree and the silence that folks here give those who are positive and still working is wrong.

 

I know one escort who tested positive, didn't tell a soul he saw. Weather you use a condom or not for sex is not my issue--it's being honest with folks about your health when you're in a business where health means life or death.

[Xander]

Well, the fact that I sign my emails with "X" and all of my current clients being canceled on for a family emergency (I'm flying back to Atlanta for a week) sure makes me look suspicious.

 

Damn, I hate reverse paranoia.

 

Play safe, be good or be good at it.

 

X

[rossthebosssf]

Over the years I've received three emails from escorts disclosing recent positive test results. Two for syphilis and one for chlamydia. I gave the escorts props for disclosing and thankfully, my tests came out negative (50 some years and counting). I always play safe - no exception and I usually see escorts who I'm fairly confident do the same. What concerns me is all the escorts who say "safe only" in their ads, but then have personal ads where they openly bareback or will bareback with clients for an extra fee. While HIV is not that much of a concern to me due to my safe sex habits, the other stuff is.

[Steven_Draker]

Got the following email from an escort I once considered hiring. It was sent to everyone in his 'database' and even though I never hired him, it sure freaked me out a little bit. Any name reference has been removed to his escort name and he does not escort any more. I try to be safe with every escort I am with (always condoms for anal etc but I have enjoyed performing oral sex in the past without a condom). It sure makes one rethink everything. Email posted below is unedited except as noted above.

 

**************

Hi all,

 

Escort X Here,

 

I am sending this to my entire client base. I am officially retired, i found out I am HIV positive, and I was positive during my entire time working. If we had unsafe times together, please get tested. Do not reply to this email, as I will be deleting my account soon anyway. I am out of the business, and I am sorry if you were put at risk because of my actions. I have been hiv positive since 2008 at least, according to the doctors, so like I said, if you ever booked with me get tested.

 

Peace,

Escort X

 

***************************

 

Have you ever gotten an email like this before? Thoughts??

 

 

I thought the escort was straightforward for sending out this email to his ex-clients and contacts.

 

He earns my respect.

 

I wouldn't consider the email 'dreaded', as it was the right and honorable thing to do.

[loverboy95]

I always respect those who are openly honest with their status. This is what every escort should do.

[calrichmond]

Here's an escort who admitted to bareback sex. It must have been agreed to by both parties. I'm sure this situation is much more common. HIV is NOT a death sentence anymore given the advances in anti-viral medications. HIV is an easily controlled chronic illness. Also, Truveda is becoming easily available as an HIV prevention technique. These are things to discuss with your physician. I think every sexually active person should have an annual STD test.

 

Soon we will see the end of condoms as the only HIV prevention technique.

[+ Travis69]

I just lost a friend to HIV in August. Not so easily controlled and for some it is a death sentence.

[+ Travis69]

Another person I know had to have both of his legs amputated due to complications with his HIV meds.

[+ Funguy]

just out of curiosity - how/why did this 2 year old thread get resurrected?

[Amoco]

I don't get this whole "honorable" thing..,the guy was a sex worker who knowingly didn't get tested and repeatedly exposed clients to extreme risk - and by the way, exposed the entire industry to risk. To then call him "honorable" for telling people six years later and subsequently disappearing, seems absurd to me. And that's the single most compelling reason for legalization and regulation. Any escort that's not getting tested regularly is a potential criminal and to my mind, needs to be dealt with. I understand the law and Daddy's rules for confidentiality, but doesn't exposing clients to unnecessary risk trump some of that? Now that the damage is done, being sorry isn't honorable...

[Steven_Draker]

Dear Amoco, I understand your concern.

 

I didn't say HE was honorable, I meant that the action of disclosing and alerting was respectable.

 

Of course, that everyone who is at risk should test annually quarterly and take all measures possible to minimize risk and exposure.

[Phil_musc]

just out of curiosity - how/why did this 2 year old thread get resurrected?

 

I was wondering that too.

[AdamSmith]

just out of curiosity - how/why did this 2 year old thread get resurrected?

 

I was wondering that too.

 

http://thebrooklyninstitute.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Sigmund_Freud_1926.jpg

[Juan Vancouver]

the guy was a sex worker who knowingly didn't get tested and repeatedly exposed clients to extreme risk - and by the way, exposed the entire industry to risk.

 

I respectfully disagree.

 

Nobody puts me at risk of anything. Nobody puts baby in the corner! I am an adult, I am an avid reader of all opinions and recommendations about my sex health and I make adult decisions about it. All the time. Consistently. Regardless of how hot or fun the moment or any given partner may feel.

 

If I am at risk it is because I took that risk.

 

If I am safe, it is because I decided to stick to safer practices.

 

I have escorted for ten years now. I have had sex with many men and women. A percentage of those sexual partners were without a doubt positive whether they knew it or not and I am still negative. This is not luck, it's discipline.

 

Accidents do happen but the percentage of people seroconverting because of an accident is really small. Also, there is rape, like a trusted sexual partner barebacking someone without their consent. But in every other instance you are in control. If you decided to engage in unsafe practices with an escort, it's not an escort exposing you to disease, you are the only one responsible for taking that risk.

 

This is not to mean that I think people deliberately exposing others are free of responsibility, my opinion is just to bring responsibility where it should be: in my own hands.

 

 

I too find it strange that this thread was resuscitated, but I guess discussing this is always helpful.

[adriano46]

just out of curiosity - how/why did this 2 year old thread get resurrected?

 

+ 3 or 4