Does it sound like the client ripped me off?

[Mocha]

Its very rare that I'll have this happen. In fact, I cant remember a time it ever happened. But it did...I walked away from a client because he was so ugly.

 

I met with a client who I was very unsure about from the get go. He sounded like a woman over the phone and I even asked if he was a man. He then asked, "is there pay involved?" I said..."uh...ya". He then offered to either leave it on the front desk for me to pick up or at the room when we met. I said I'll just get it in the room (sounded suspicious).

 

So I go and meet him, he's there in the lobby with a 20s something y/o straight white couple. I thought they were just going to go to separate rooms. Instead they came inside with myself and the client and for about 15-20 minutes they were chatting up a storm and my client's acquientence was rolling up a joint.

 

Prior to this, the moment I seen the client I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything. Even the thought of getting hard made me want to cringe. He had the worst teeth I've ever seen in my life. He was like half man/half woman, overweight...I was frightened. I couldn't quite muster how to just say, "you're a monster". I spent 10 minutes in the bathroom trying to figure how I would slip out the door.

 

As I walked out the bathroom, the client came in to talk to me, and I told him that I didnt feel comfortable with 2 other people in the room who I had no idea would be there. We spent another 10 minutes talking, but I told him I had to go.

 

I told him I would be happy to just accept $20 cancel fee. He then lied and said he never carries cash on him. I really just wanted to run for the hills, but I was upset that I drove way out there, spent 20 minutes of my time, and didn't get paid shit. I understand it was me who backed out...but there were 3 opposing things going on that shouldn't: bad hygiene and 2 people, smoking pot.

 

Do you think the client ripped me off? He offered to give a check which I declined. I'm not trying to get busted for bouncing a check that he'd probably cancel before the next morning...

[cynicalflannelwearer]

The client did not rip you off.

 

Hi Mocha,

 

You have every right to back out of the deal for whatever reason you choose. However, you may have wanted to get all the details of the encounter straight before you met up with him.

That being said, you said he was a girly looking guy and you knew you could not get hard for him.What type of clients do you expect man, hot muscle studs with large penises? Not gonna happen.

As far as the pot smoking friends of his, were they going to watch you two get it on?

I know this sounds mean, but you know how the saying goes, you lie down with dogs, you are going to get fleas. You chose this profession, you must know what it might entail. Sorry man.

I am ready for the sycophants to react! LOL

[+ purplekow]

While I would expect the escort to be able to perform no matter how grotesque he finds me, lets face it you get more beautiful music from an Amati than from a plastic violin. But in this case, it is just so bizarre that it seems that the point was to get you there and for nothing to happen. Since money was discussed, I wonder how it was that the client did not have the money agree to. So I think you got ripped off by this strange situation. I guess stepping away rather than proceeding with what you know will be a terrible experience is probably correct, but I agree with cynicalflannelwearer, if you are to be a professional escort, you need to suck it up under bad situations.

[cynicalflannelwearer]

Prior to this, the moment I seen the client I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything. Even the thought of getting hard made me want to cringe. He had the worst teeth I've ever seen in my life. He was like half man/half woman, overweight...I was frightened. I couldn't quite muster how to just say, "you're a monster". I spent 10 minutes in the bathroom trying to figure how I would slip out the door.

 

OK, I must say some more on this subject even though I am tired and need to work tomorrow. So, this "monster", while being weird, wanted you to spend an hour with him, maybe for that hour he would not feel like a monster,that is why he hired you. Maybe he had the money and maybe he didn't, but the fact that you thought he was disgusting is quite telling of the kind of escort you may be.Yes, he sounds unattractive, but I can think of few things more humiliating than being rejected by a person that gets paid good money to spend time with me.Sorry for the rant,but that is how I feel about it.

 

Question is, you would not have spent time with this man/woman even if he didn't have the straight pot smoking couple tagging along, right? Even if he had the money in plain view up front on the dresser you would still have not gone through with it, right? Enough said.

 

If you can't play the game "pretend" for an hour it may be time to reconsider your profession. Am i judging you? Absolutley...but you judged him on his appearance first and foremost.

[rvwnsd]

Although I think you were wise for backing out, I do not believe the client "ripped you off." Rather, I think he created a situation that posed a threat to your safety and you made a choice that eliminated that threat. Good for you for recognizing a bad situation and living to tell the tale.

 

Regarding the lack of attraction you felt toward this person, that is something you need to think about as an escort. You will be faced with unattractive people who hire because that is the only way they can get laid. If you choose not to engage them as clients, that is your choice. Expecting a cancellation fee because you decided not to go through with an encounter is absurd. That's a cost of doing business.

 

In closing, I want to say that I think you should not have met the client in the first place. You mentioned that something sounded fishy when you talked on the phone. If something sounds wrong, it probably is. Take a pass. I don't think you are "at fault," I'm just saying that you should trust your gut instinct.

[wayout]

Mocha, sounds like a difficult and bizarre situation. In the strictest interpretation I do feel that you got ripped off. With the specifics of bad hygiene, pot and 2 others present, each by themselves can be considered a deal breaker. Getting some compensation for your time and effort is reasonable ($20 seems appropriate request) and having him clearly lie about having no cash is the clencher that he, in my opinion, ripped you off.

 

A couple points I would raise for the future is to listen to your instincts as rvwnsd indicated and don't let things go too far before acting (right from the meeting in the lobby you knew it wasn't going to work so you should have left at that point). Considering you were turned off by this client from the outset, I suspect you let the prospect of money overtake your better judement of walking away from the start. Don't let money cause you to risk your health, safety or well being. At the risk of lecturing, a good escort is one who is honest with themselve and their clients at all times.

 

Regarding his unattractiveness, I am assuming you did not in fact call him ugly or other derogatory names to his face but rather you were just turned off. Although I do see the point of view raised by others that judging his appearance may not be appropriate for your role as an escort, let's acknowledge the obvious and that is that you are human and not a robot. As such, if it impacts your ability to perform significantly or frequently then that is something you need to address as part of how you do your job but it is understandable that everyone has a point at which they can't perform the way they would like because of a lack of connection (be it physical, chemistry, etc).

[jgoo]

Its very rare that I'll have this happen. In fact, I cant remember a time it ever happened. But it did...I walked away from a client because he was so ugly.

 

I understand it was me who backed out...but there were 3 opposing things going on that shouldn't: bad hygiene and 2 people, smoking pot.

 

 

You start out by saying you walked away because the client was so ugly. But at the end you say there are other mitigating circumstances for you backing out (bad hygiene, 2 people and smoking pot).

 

Look at each set of reasons individually. In the first case (where you say he was ugly), that was your decision and as such you don't deserve anything from him (unless somehow he totally misrepresented himself in some descriptions or pictures sent prior to meeting). In the second case, at face value with the facts as presented, it was reasonable for you to walk away and the client has some responsibility to compensate you for your time and expenses.

 

Looking at the whole situation I believe the sequence of events is important. Ultimately you readily admit you were turned off and could not perform because of his appearance so I would say that takes precident as you knew it was not going to work as soon as you met him in the lobby before anything else happened. Therefore, on balance you don't deserve anything (and as such you were not ripped off).

[whipped guy]

...the sequence of events is important. Ultimately you readily admit you were turned off and could not perform because of his appearance so I would say that takes precident...

If you can't play the game "pretend" for an hour it may be time to reconsider your profession. Am i judging you? Absolutley...but you judged him on his appearance first and foremost.

As such, if it impacts your ability to perform significantly or frequently then that is something you need to address as part of how you do your job but it is understandable that everyone has a point at which they can't perform the way they would like because of a lack of connection (be it physical, chemistry, etc).

It takes a special talent to be an escort… and that includes having to deal with various degrees of humanity… the good, the bad, and yes the ugly… Somehow an escort needs to see past the ugly and other irritating personality traits and simply do his job. After all, that is probably why the person is hiring an escort in the first place. I guess if I were an escort I would assume that every client had yellow teeth, a cleft lip, a club foot, was hunch backed, and had a boil the size of Texas on his neck… until proven otherwise that is. That way nothing would surprise me. However, bad hygiene, drugs, being intoxicated, unwillingness to engage safely, and other excess baggage (such as in this case) are indeed valid reasons to end the proceedings.

 

The client expects and should be entitled to a certain level of performance… not necessarily perfection because there is no such thing at least not on a totally consistent basis… However, you owe it to the client to be as close to your peak as possible, if you are unable to cope with the situation then you need to end the liaison right then and there as after all the encounter would not have worked anyway and if drugs, etc. are involved the consequences could be quite risky.

 

Still if you can’t pretend for an hour or so then you might need to reconsider… Hiring is usually about making a dream come true… and at times that dream might be a nightmare for you… but that is something that goes with the territory… within reason that is… and as such that is one of the pitfalls of being in business… any business.

[josephga]

I agree. Every now and then I use to get massage clients that would ask if I offered escorting for a higher fee? I always said no regardless of what they looked like or how much money they offered. Because, You can be good looking, have a great body, fantastic dick or a hot fuckable ass. But the most important quality is fantastic acting skills which I lack. IMO the best escorts can find at least one beautiful quality in everyone and focus in on that.. I'm sure most get more clients that look like bruce valance than bruce willis you just have to suck it up like others said.

[Mocha]

That being said, you said he was a girly looking guy and you knew you could not get hard for him.What type of clients do you expect man, hot muscle studs with large penises? Not gonna happen.

 

You are clueless. In fact, the morning after the appointment a very muscled guy showed up. And I can remember quite a few big dicked muscle guys showing up. I usually attract those types anyhow. So that throws your theory out the window.

 

I also didnt say I couldn't get hard, I said that even if I did get hard...I would be disgusted. Had you seen the rot and grime on his/her teeth, you'd say the same damn thing. It looked as if he had spent years on Heroin and crack. I wasn't going to have that going around my fuck stick.

 

Now...I see some people feel that I did get ripped, others didn't. But I wanted to delve into a couple of things that some (obviously clients) had mentioned.

 

1st of all, I have to disagreee entirely on the matter of me being a 'horrible escort' in this case. Had you read it carefully, you'd see it was the 1st time I ever did such a thing. So I get sent to hell over that? Sounds insane. I have met with dozens upon dozens of clients who I didn't find particularly attractive, but I was always able to find something cute about them. This is not a thread about me walking away from ugly clients because it never happened prior to this.

 

Now...it is true that although I felt a certain way on the initial meet, having 2 other people there worsened an already uncomfty situation. When he said to the young lady that I was "his date", it just threw my discretness out the window. In their heads, they were probably like, "wow...they are going to have sex, I feel sorry for him".

 

As much as clients like to be discreet, I would too. What if the tables were turned, huh? You (client) showed up at my hotel with my 2 buddies chatting up a storm rolling up a joint. You'd been gone. Period. And write me a horrid review.

 

Its amazing how some feel it was justified to leave empty handed and all I asked was $20, yet there are so many industries who charge you 90, 100, 200 just to 'look' at a problem.

 

I have no issue pretending and making a client feel as he is the hottest guy in the room. But, there are some limitations to that. This guy...claiming he was a quote "muli-billionaire" neglected to care for his oral hygiene which would have been pocket lint to a multi-billionaire. I believe I was in a very shady situation...nothing seemed right.

[josephga]

in your defense I do find it wrong and tacky that he had others around. iv had massage clients call and ask if they could bring someone or if i took couples and it was always a flat out NO, I wouldn't have felt safe with others around.

[Mocha]

in your defense I do find it wrong and tacky that he had others around. iv had massage clients call and ask if they could bring someone or if i took couples and it was always a flat out NO, I wouldn't have felt safe with others around.

 

He was making it seem like he totally didn't know they were showing up. Now...the other guy that was there was cute, and around my age. So if we were going to have a big 4-person orgie then I may have been able to handle that, but it seemed highly unlikely.

 

But he was telling me that they'd be leaving soon, had no idea they were coming. It seemed suspicious because he was waiting in the lobby with them. Prior to this, he said his realtor came over to see him (on a weekend night) and it pushed the booking back for another 2 hours and he didnt call when he said so.

[josephga]

where do you advertise? I think that will determine on some level the types of clients you get. Don't ever put ads up on hook up sites stating looking for generous. that pisses those looking for freebies off and looks unprofessional. stick with sites like rentboy, men4rentnow. even then you will get unattractive guys its just part of that business.

[Mocha]

where do you advertise? I think that will determine on some level the types of clients you get. Don't ever put ads up on hook up sites stating looking for generous. that pisses those looking for freebies off and looks unprofessional. stick with sites like rentboy, men4rentnow. even then you will get unattractive guys its just part of that business.

 

Unfortunently, it was from men4rent. Which surprised me even more.

[Guest ChgoBoy]

Unfortunently, it was from men4rent. Which surprised me even more.

 

HMMM... What's your Men4RentNow ID#?

 

I ask because there is no listing under your moniker here and MOST escorts that chat up these type boards like to make it easy for clients to find them. You're sort of an enigma in that regard.

[Mocha]

HMMM... What's your Men4RentNow ID#?

 

I ask because there is no listing under your moniker here and MOST escorts that chat up these type boards like to make it easy for clients to find them. You're sort of an enigma in that regard.

 

Well I'm not MOST escorts. Sometimes people want to talk about things without having themselves known publicly. Is it not ok to do that?

[cynicalflannelwearer]

Well I'm not MOST escorts. Sometimes people want to talk about things without having themselves known publicly. Is it not ok to do that?

 

No, it's fine to do that, but why? Don't you want more business from us fat, ugly losers? Get real.The reason you don't link to your escort ads is because this way you can say what you want and not have to deal with any negative, real world consequences, namely possible lost business.

 

I don't call myself cynical for nothing.

[Mocha]

No, it's fine to do that, but why? Don't you want more business from us fat, ugly losers? Get real.The reason you don't link to your escort ads is because this way you can say what you want and not have to deal with any negative, real world consequences, namely possible lost business.

 

I don't call myself cynical for nothing.

 

Funny...besides, what makes you so concerned about my business anyhow. You asked a question, I gave an answer. Don't take it personal.

 

Its not cynical that you are behaving like an idiot in a thread that is admittedly controversial yet realistic. It has nothing to do about fat, ugly losers as much as the specific situation that went on.

[Guest ChgoBoy]

More likely

 

The reason you don't link to your escort ads is because this way you can say what you want and not have to deal with any negative, real world consequences, namely possible lost business.

 

My take on all this is that Mocha isn't an escort at all. Just somebody pulling some strings. If you review all of his posts here, they are filled with drama and unlikely scenarios found by most legit escorts.

 

Mocha, more likely than not, IS that disgusting client he regales us with in his latest dramatic post.

 

You don't have to be cynical to see that.

[cynicalflannelwearer]

Funny...besides, what makes you so concerned about my business anyhow. You asked a question, I gave an answer. Don't take it personal.

 

Its not cynical that you are behaving like an idiot in a thread that is admittedly controversial yet realistic. It has nothing to do about fat, ugly losers as much as the specific situation that went on.

 

I'd much rather be at pride in the pines right now, but since it is raining,I am here matching wits with the famous mocha, whoever that is.

 

I really don't know why I am bothering..... you didn't want advice, or constructive criticism, you wanted validation for your behavior with that girly guy, even though you feel you did nothing wrong......ugh, kids these days! Best wishes with your chosen career.

[Mocha]

My take on all this is that Mocha isn't an escort at all. Just somebody pulling some strings. If you review all of his posts here, they are filled with drama and unlikely scenarios found by most legit escorts.

 

Mocha, more likely than not, IS that disgusting client he regales us with in his latest dramatic post.

 

You don't have to be cynical to see that.

 

Well what are you? Since I did ask this in the ask an escort section, if you are a client shouldn't be offended. Or are you even a client, or a retiree?

[Guest ChgoBoy]

After Further Review........

 

Perhaps Mocha's drama IS justified after all. It seems as though most of his publicized experiences as an escort, on this board at least, have been less then well, let's just say, Positive for him.

 

I feel badly for Mocha now. Not because he is probably inept at his escorting skills - but because, after reading about his latest client failure, it led me to think about what Mocha's client list might just look like, if it were to reflect those very posts AND how he views clients in general. Fat, grotesque and out of control.

 

http://sirmitchell.tumblr.com/post/687822487/challenge-when-you-see-the-red-laser-dots-try

[Toulouse]

Mocha,

You indicated that you had stayed in the restroom ten minutes trying to determine how to sneak out of the hotel room. If you were willing to sneak out and wanted out of the appointment as quickly as possible, why bother making a big deal over $20?...especially considering you were the one canceling the session, not the client. If the client had cancelled once you arrived, the client would be obligated to pay you at least half of your fee, imho. Since you were backing out, I really don't think he ripped you off.

[NYTomcat]

Mocha,

 

First off You intimate you didn't want him cause too ugly and would disgust yourself. Well since a lot of clients feel that way about themselves and hire to get away from that you just shot yourself in the foot.

 

Then you claim cynical is a retiree. Now showing you dont want clients who are older. OK another huge block here.

 

The fact the client had a feminine demeanor I also find... wel a ridiculous requirement for an escort who services the gay community

 

You also post that while looking for a way to escape you instead ask for what amounts to gas money. Even though you had no intention to perform for looks.

 

While the clients behavior and the two additional people were odd. And I agree the client hygiene is a valid concern. That does not make up for you coming across as only wanting hot young guys to pay you for your time You hit a hornets nest on this one. I can only say I'm glad ... if you actually are a working guy.... that you didnt post your name. This thread is not making you look very hirable to alot of people... me included I'm afraid. I think you need to learn what escorts truly do for clients and its not run because the are unattractive or old

 

Now having no money.... thats a different story. But not worth pursuing given your major gaffs in this one.

 

IF you truly want to be an escort you need to learn something. we clients are there spending our money and time to be with you. Truly great escorts are turned on by the excitment they inspire in others. The truth is this isnt about or shouldnt be about cherry picking your hires. If the fact someone is so into you that they will give up their cash to just share time with you isnt enough to turn you on .... perhaps this is the wrong profession for you. Just a thought. IMHO as a client

[Romann]

Hold the train...

 

Mocha-

 

Please accept my comments as nothing more than my thoughts based on your documented question to fellow professionals, one at which I would like to think I am. But then again, what do I know?

 

So I go and meet him, he's there in the lobby with a 20s something y/o straight white couple. I thought they were just going to go to separate rooms. Instead they came inside with myself and the client and for about 15-20 minutes they were chatting up a storm and my client's acquaintance was rolling up a joint.

 

IMHO, you are being paid for your time and if it pleases the client to bring you into that circle regardless of the length of time that he may or may not have known the additional guests that you're referring to. As for the client's acquaintance rolling a joint, I don't think it is proper to blame the client for that or to use it as a vehicle to support your point. Having said that, it's your personal responsibility to analyze the situation at which you're involved in and make the proper course correction if necessary and if that meant removing yourself from the room because of the joint, then so be it. At the end of the day, everyone has to answer for their own actions.

 

Prior to this, the moment I seen the client I knew I wouldn't be able to do anything. Even the thought of getting hard made me want to cringe. He had the worst teeth I've ever seen in my life. He was like half man/half woman, overweight...I was frightened. I couldn't quite muster how to just say, "you're a monster". I spent 10 minutes in the bathroom trying to figure how I would slip out the door.

 

IMHO, you will serve your clients much better by focusing on the experience before you and strive for that connection which will enrich the overall experience for all involved. The clients physical appearance is not up for debate nor should it be a factor in whether the appointment should continue or conclude. Escorting is not always about play time but in many instances does require a social element as well in which you're expected to perform. I would like to think that your comments about the clients supposed appearance were said out of frustration which I can certainly appreciate and have fallen victim to more than once. Though, I can personally say that I have been honored to share some VERY AMAZING and mind blowing experiences with clients that you have described above and did so because of the love for my profession and because it is truly my desire to fire up an hour, multiple hours, evening, overnight or weekend and without judgment. I do this because it's in my nature to please others and in return, it pleases me greatly.

 

In any case, the client was parading you around and that should count for something don't you think?

 

If you have requirements for your clientele specifically regarding their looks or specific hygiene requirements, that's certainly your choice and one you should be confident about having and implementing accordingly because at the end of the day, it's your business and you should run it as you see fit. Though, it may be in your best interests and for the sake of argument to detail these requirements in your profiles to put clients on notice and maybe situations like this can be avoided.

 

Do you think the client ripped me off? He offered to give a check which I declined. I'm not trying to get busted for bouncing a check that he'd probably cancel before the next morning...

 

IMHO, you probably made a good choice in not accepting a personal check and this wouldn't be a practice that I would recommend unless it's a client that you truly know, trust and are comfortable with. After all, it does create a paper trail and does link you to not only another account but a person.

 

Do I think the client ripped you off? Personally, that's a difficult question to answer. Based on my interpretation of what transpired in this appointment, you had already decided for yourself while in the bathroom for 10 minutes that you were going to cancel the appointment and not the client. So, it's hard to say whether you were ripped off because as a professional, it is prudent to also consider the client experience as well mainly from the fact that he was the one hiring for your time and service.

 

Did the client receive the product/service that he requested for the length of time at which he hired for?

 

Again, these are just my thoughts based on the information that you provided in your initial posts requesting the thoughts and opinions of your fellow professionals.