It's Just Sad!

[+ Lucky]

The loss of a young life is a tragedy, especially when they are full of promise for the future..The young guy that jumped off the Empire State Building this week was quite determined, as his note reveals. But you just wonder what could have been done to save him. Had he lived another day would he have changed his mind? He was a student at Yale, so he must have had a good education. It's just sad.

http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gen/153546/thumbs/s-CAMERON-DABAGHI-EMPIRE-STATE-YALE-large.jpg Cameron Dabaghi

 

 

 

 

NEW YORK — A Yale University junior left a suicide note in his dorm room before heading to New York, where he apparently plunged to his death by jumping from the Empire State Building, police said Wednesday.

Cameron Dabaghi, 21, from Austin, Texas, jumped from the 86th floor observation deck Tuesday during evening rush hour. His note said he was sorry and he would be jumping from either the George Washington Bridge over the Hudson River in upper Manhattan, or the Empire State building, police said. There were seven other people on the observation deck at the same time, and one person tried to talk to the jumper as he climbed over the barrier, but was unsuccessful.

[Guest OCBeachbody]

That is sad...... so far from what I check on the news, they don't list why he jumped. Lot of touching remembrances for him, seems he was a very bright and playful guy at Yale.

 

I am surprised that you could still climb out from the observation deck? I thought they made it so you couldn't do that anymore. Have done the typical tourist sites in NYC for years... only did that the first time I went.

 

Poor guy.

[+ Archer]

It's certainly sad that he believed there was no other choice but to kill himself. Considering how busy the streets and sidewalks are in New York, it is fortunate that he didn't land on anyone and kill one or more people who want to live.

[JackTwist]

R.i.p.

 

My thoughts and prayers to his family and friends. Their grief and remorse must be enormous today. Perhaps there was nothing they could do, since people who end their lives often do not share the pain they suffer. Having lost a couple of friends/colleagues to suicide, it is hardest on those of us left behind trying to ask why, why did they not tell us they were hurting or ask us for help. Rest in peace young man.

[+ Charlie]

I have lost two acquaintances to suicide in the past couple of months, both much younger than I. Both were talented, successful men with many good friends. Neither had any objective, rational reason for the act, only the demons within their own minds, which were usually well hidden.

[Guest OCBeachbody]

Sorry to here for your losses guys.

[CowboyUp]

Interesting Article: Veterinarians & Suicide

 

A recent study from the U.K. reports Veterinarians are four times as likely to commit suicide than the average person. Why?

Full story here: http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/pets/2010-04-02-dolittler02_ST_N.htm

[+ g56whiz]

The death of Cameron Dabaghi is a true tragedy. But it will be even more so if we limit ourselves to expressions of condolence and fail to use it as motivation to learn something more about depression and suicide in order to be able to deal with it knowingly when we encounter it in ourselves or in those we know or love.

 

I have a vested interest in this issue. I have battled a low grade form of chronic depression for much of the last five decades and have had two suicidal episodes.

 

The first thing to remember is that depression is a mental illness, and no matter what the immediate cause, it has a physical expression as real as that of any other illness from the common cold to cancer. In the case of depression it is a hormonal imbalance in the brain.

 

Consider grief. Extreme stress over a period of time endangers many systems within the body. When we experience the extreme stress that accompanies the loss of a loved one, the loss of employment, or a close relationship run amok, the body steps in to relieve that stress by adjusting hormone levels in the brain to force the body to slow down and dissipate that dangerous stress. There are, however, those of us who endure an imbalance of those same hormones without a triggering occurrence or by fate of a genetic predisposition. Or the brain can fail to rebalance once the occurrence has passed. When this occurs, the mind can perniciously create the delusions of paranoia, anxiety, persecution or a host of other evil thoughts to create the stress to which it seeks to respond. To suggest “if only he or she had” fails to comprehend that the victim often has no ability at all to think or act rationally. In one of my episodes I convinced myself that by committing suicide I was relieving my loved ones of the burden of having to deal with my increasing dementia. It would be my gift to those I knew loved me. Depression can do that.

 

Today there are amazing antidepressants but getting the right therapeutic to meet the need is a very inexact science, and their effectiveness for a particular patient can be short-lived. Moreover, these pharmaceuticals are not without side effects. Can you picture life freed from constant sadness but also without out the ability to experience great joy as well. Would relief from your unending sorrow be worth giving up your sex life? Some patients develop tics and other neurological irregularities that persist even when the medication is withdrawn. Most of these medications are metabolized in the liver. Overtime, I encountered a liver breakdown that gave me non-viral hepatitis that put me out of work for three months.

 

Talk therapy in conjunction with medication seems to work best but health care insurers are loath to pay for one modality much less two. The new Mental Health Care Parity Law may hopefully change this.

 

By far the most important factor in dealing with mental illness is awareness. As a patient, who has acknowledged his illness, I am aware when a bout begins. Because I am aware, I consciously manage stress. It is difficult for me to be deluded by anxiety and paranoia when I understand them for what they are. I’m left with an untreated mood disorder. I can’t watch Oprah, Extreme Makeover, anything on the Lifetime Channel and most dramatic shows or movies without a short bout of unavoidable weepies from which I quickly recover. I’m no longer embarrassed by it. I have made those that know me aware of my depression and this resultant mood disorder. Most accept it as another of my traits, like hair color, handedness of the fact that I greatly favor muscular men. The rest have distanced themselves to our mutual benefit.

 

It is public awareness and acceptance of mental illness that will create the climate that will allow other victims to begin to address and deal with their plight. And it is those of us who know and accept it that will create this climate.

 

Make no mistake; there are those perhaps like Cameron Dabaghi or the late David Foster Wallace who, given our current medications, will remain beyond our ability to reach. Depression, suicide and other forms of mental illness will ever be part of the human condition. To them and their memory: requiescat in pacem.

 

If you’ve gotten this far, perhaps you’ll forgive me for prattling on: this is a topic in which I continue to have a passionate interest.

[Toulouse]

Thanks

 

Thanks, G56whiz, for courageously and poignantly sharing your first-hand knowledge. I found your post both informative and enlightening.

[Lookin]

Thanks, G56whiz, for courageously and poignantly sharing your first-hand knowledge. I found your post both informative and enlightening.

Very well said, Toulouse. My thanks also, g56whiz. I hope this awareness will help to let us reach others in time.

[KMEM]

g56-

 

First and foremost, one has to recognize what is wrong, then deal with it as best one can. Obviously you have done an outstanding job of that in what is surely an all day, every day endeavor. Like alcoholism and some other diseases, this one has to be fought every day.

 

However, you have no obligation whatsoever to share this with others. I applaud you for doing so. I am sure you have helped another today.

 

Best regards,

KMEM

[BaronArtz]

I appreciate your comments g56 ... it was spoken from the heart. We are always here for you.

[Guest DuchessIvanaKizznhugg]

If you’ve gotten this far, perhaps you’ll forgive me for prattling on: this is a topic in which I continue to have a passionate interest.

 

Hardly prattle, g56whiz.

You have an outstanding ability to stand tall and shed light on a disease which is perplexing to those who don't suffer, and which is horribly debilitating to those who do.

I'm glad you remain in control, and have supportive friends to look over you.

If ever my ears can be of help.....I have two big ones!

[raulgmanzo]

Thanks g56whiz, just reread your post, it is very helpful.

Its difficult to talk about, this year a very close friend killed herself after enduring some crushing emotional, marital and health problems.

In her final weeks we got together every couple of days. One day she invited me over for espresso and cookies. I couldn't make it. She killed herself that night. I know it is not my fault, but I still wish I could have done more.

She was an extremely giving person, recently fighting bureacracy to create a program on her own time and expense to help incarcerated and at risk women. She was involved in so much, and even in her darkest moments she left me gifts for my garden and was willing to help anybody with anything. As much as I thought I knew her I was stunned that at her memorial service people who I had never heard of talked about things she had done for them.

 

I will have to live a very long time to even come close to giving what she gave in her short time on earth.

 

One of the reasons I've not been comfortable talking about it is that I've selfishly seen it as my loss or her being taken away from her family and been angry at those who hurt and ignored her sadness. But more and more I realize how incredibly lucky I was to know her. In spite of her tragic end it was a blessing to know her and be inspired by her good deeds and accomplishments.

[Guest greatness]

May she rests in peace~~~

 

Raul I'm sorry about your loss.. May she rests in peace.. You are such a sweet person and that's why she wanted to spent her last day with you. I hope you can see that too.

 

Thanks g56whiz, just reread your post, it is very helpful.

Its difficult to talk about, this year a very close friend killed herself after enduring some crushing emotional, marital and health problems.

In her final weeks we got together every couple of days. One day she invited me over for espresso and cookies. I couldn't make it. She killed herself that night. I know it is not my fault, but I still wish I could have done more.

She was an extremely giving person, recently fighting bureacracy to create a program on her own time and expense to help incarcerated and at risk women. She was involved in so much, and even in her darkest moments she left me gifts for my garden and was willing to help anybody with anything. As much as I thought I knew her I was stunned that at her memorial service people who I had never heard of talked about things she had done for them.

 

I will have to live a very long time to even come close to giving what she gave in her short time on earth.

 

One of the reasons I've not been comfortable talking about it is that I've selfishly seen it as my loss or her being taken away from her family and been angry at those who hurt and ignored her sadness. But more and more I realize how incredibly lucky I was to know her. In spite of her tragic end it was a blessing to know her and be inspired by her good deeds and accomplishments.

[+ purplekow]

This weekend I was invited to a 40th Birthday Tribute. My brother-in-law's wife spent a great deal of time inviting people to put together a living memorial party for her husband. At the introduction she mentioned that she was inspired to plan this party at the memorial service for an acquaintance who had died suddenly. She sat at the service and consider: Did he have any idea of the love and respect that people had for him? She decided then to hold a tribute for her husband. She asked about 10 people to speak about the impact that my brother in law, a police officer, had in shaping their lives. She arranged for people from all ages and phases of his life to come and speak. It was uplifting and enlightening. My Brotherinlaw is a big city police officer and several of the speakers were also cops and the public display of emotion in their tributes was startling. Several cried while speaking of the kindness or support my brother in law provided.

Something to consider. How many of us could use just that sort of encouragement to make a particularly tough day, bearable?

[Guest DuchessIvanaKizznhugg]

pk, your brother-in-law's wife sounds like a smart, caring, cookie.

Would that there be more like her who are willing to shake things up with an unconventional approach. Bravo.