Vanilla Extract

[doitb4ugo]

While trying to write my first review, I was about to use the term "Vanilla". I thought for a moment or two and realized that despite my knowing its definition, I did not understand what it meant.

 

Can I extract from the guys here in the Forum what inference or connotation they derive from the term "VANILLA".....What will the reader think I mean by the word....Thanks.

[MsGuy]

Good question. To me vanilla means the basics, sucking and fucking. Not sure if it includes kissing. No role play, toys, kink, rimming, unusual positions or specialty stuff. Used to describe boundaries not quality of experience. Thinking it over, I would include an implication of safe play. It would be interesting to see how others use the word.

[josephga]

vanilla to me means, kissing making out, frottage , basic oral and anal always safe.

[Epigonos]

As far as I'm concerned josephaga's definition is RIGHT ON TARGET!!!!! My kind of fun.

[+ deej]

I don't think it will ever have a precise definition.

 

To me, vanilla means "no kink" but then you have to define kink. Let's face it, to a large portion of the population any form of gay sex is kinky. To some gay men, rimming is kinky. To some portion of the population *cough*billclinton*cough*, oral sex isn't sex at all.

 

But I think you're safe using vanilla to mean nothing out of the ordinary.

[+ Charlie]

To joseph's definition I would add masturbation, mutual or otherwise. Some people use vanilla to refer to an image or attitude even more than to activities; e.g., they might find tattoos, piercings, or "dirty" verbal inappropriate for a vanilla scene.

[whipped guy]

Fat-free vanilla

 

Again I think that josephga's definition is right on target. When anal and possibly oral are eliminated so as to leave one with basically kissing, cuddling, other body contact, masturbation, etc. I like to refer to it as "fat-free vanilla"...

 

I got the idea for that term one evening a number of years ago after leaving a BDSM session in NYC. As I entered the food court area in Penn Station I suddenly got the urge for a fat free vanilla frozen yogurt... and it proved to be the perfect antidote to balance what I had just experienced. I then got to thinking that very often BDSM sessions are often like "fat-free vanilla"... except that the vanilla is replaced by something more like rocky road.

[NYTomcat]

Again I think that josephga's definition is right on target. When anal and possibly oral are eliminated so as to leave one with basically kissing, cuddling, other body contact, masturbation, etc. I like to refer to it as "fat-free vanilla"...

 

I got the idea for that term one evening a number of years ago after leaving a BDSM session in NYC. As I entered the food court area in Penn Station I suddenly got the urge for a fat free vanilla frozen yogurt... and it proved to be the perfect antidote to balance what I had just experienced. I then got to thinking that very often BDSM sessions are often like "fat-free vanilla"... except that the vanilla is replaced by something more like rocky road.

 

 

OK so under those terms... I've always considered rimming vanilla. Maybe just me. How about we just call that French vanilla;)

[+ purplekow]

I think perhaps Vanilla with a chocolate swirl

[NYTomcat]

There you go fudge ripple. God's have my morals taken a vacation. Thank God

[Okliehomo]

Absolutely not!!

 

No fudge, no chocolate, no swirl, no ripple...

 

Not even a whiff.

 

The Malt Shop has to be squeaky clean, boys, before I take (taste?) a seat...

 

Okie

[Guest Spanky]

No fudge, no chocolate, no swirl, no ripple...

 

Not even a whiff.

 

The Malt Shop has to be squeaky clean, boys, before I take (taste?) a seat...

 

Okie

 

I like to do a lot, but I'm with Okie on this one. I've got no issues with consenting adults doing whatever they please when it comes to sex, but no way no how would I ever consent to this. It just baffles me that guys are into this.

[+ Lucky]

Ah, Spanky, I used to think so too. And even now I wonder what is it that makes me want to do that. Only a very select few men appeal to me in such a way. But some guys just have butts that beg to be eaten. Danny Cruz comes to mind.

For the most part, I see this as a place of no interest. But when a guy really hits my attraction buttons, and otherwise fits the agreeable criteria (clean, etc.), then allowing me access to what is essentially his most private place is quite a turn on. So, it becomes a form of reaching the sexual essence of the man, and, if I may say so without getting slammed, his sacred spot of sexuality.

[josephga]

while on that topic if the person has cleaned correctly there is no taste.. thats a activity that has too be planned out

[NYTomcat]

Gentlemen. Please. Its a play on words. Not a statement on cleanliness. Lets just go back to French. Then. If it pleases everyone's sense of decorum.

[justaguy]

By all means, Tomcat. If it's my face exploring that "sacred spot of sexuality," it's all about decorum and probity :-).

[NYTomcat]

Ah, Spanky, I used to think so too. And even now I wonder what is it that makes me want to do that. Only a very select few men appeal to me in such a way. But some guys just have butts that beg to be eaten. Danny Cruz comes to mind.

For the most part, I see this as a place of no interest. But when a guy really hits my attraction buttons, and otherwise fits the agreeable criteria (clean, etc.), then allowing me access to what is essentially his most private place is quite a turn on. So, it becomes a form of reaching the sexual essence of the man, and, if I may say so without getting slammed, his sacred spot of sexuality.

I think lucky you are exactly right. Its not an activity that I would independently think of as a turn on. But when the moment is right the preparation done and partner correct it is the essence of the moment and an almost impassable opportunity to heighten the experience. As odd as I find it in the abstract. That why I say it needs to be part of even the vanilla experience. OK as I said maybe vanilla+ with your friend+

 

By all means, Tomcat. If it's my face exploring that "sacred spot of sexuality," it's all about decorum and probity :-).

Well as you know justaguy I am all about the proper sense of decorum for the appropriate situation. Its just my sense of appropriate that has been so expanded. ;-)

[AdamSmith]

God's have my morals taken a vacation. Thank God

 

Yes!! "Thank God"

 

Before I first rimmed anybody I could not see the attraction. But, first time I did it -- no turning back! Now every chance I get.

 

...But all the warnings on here about the risks of "bad housekeeping" down there -- people must be keeping company with some nasty peeps indeed! I go down there every time, and so far never met a dirty one.

 

Maybe I just have no standards.

[josephga]

I haven't met a dirty one down there yet either but I'm extremely picky about it and would never do it to someone unless its in a relationship..

[Guest Spanky]

Ah, Spanky, I used to think so too. And even now I wonder what is it that makes me want to do that. Only a very select few men appeal to me in such a way. But some guys just have butts that beg to be eaten. Danny Cruz comes to mind.

For the most part, I see this as a place of no interest. But when a guy really hits my attraction buttons, and otherwise fits the agreeable criteria (clean, etc.), then allowing me access to what is essentially his most private place is quite a turn on. So, it becomes a form of reaching the sexual essence of the man, and, if I may say so without getting slammed, his sacred spot of sexuality.

 

Oh, don't get me wrong - give me a nice hairy butt and it's the perfect midnight snack (or early morning, midday, or evening snack). But there are guys who LIKE rimming a butt that is not spotless. That is what I don't understand and have no interest in doing.

[AdamSmith]

But there are guys who LIKE rimming a butt that is not spotless. That is what I don't understand and have no interest in doing.

 

Agree with that. Scat, or anything redolent of it, is the one 'paraphilia' I've never seen the pleasure of, even vicariously.

 

Back to 'clean' rimming -- worth noting that it is fully as blessed to receive as to give! Nothing else feels quite like it.

[justaguy]

"it is fully as blessed to receive as to give"

So true. And blessed be the tongues that can make you go ohhhhh!

[justaguy]

"...my sense of appropriate that has been so expanded"

 

He's got a luscious ass, and by golly it really does look kinda like a rosebud, and he enjoys it--in those circumstances it seems to me it would be inappropriate not to indulge :-).

[NYTomcat]

Yes!! "Thank God"

 

Before I first rimmed anybody I could not see the attraction. But, first time I did it -- no turning back! Now every chance I get.

 

...But all the warnings on here about the risks of "bad housekeeping" down there -- people must be keeping company with some nasty peeps indeed! I go down there every time, and so far never met a dirty one.

 

Maybe I just have no standards.

 

I haven't met a dirty one down there yet either but I'm extremely picky about it and would never do it to someone unless its in a relationship..

 

I guess us bfe -friends+ hirers are always "in a relationship" im just kiddingi agree not unless clean but it does seem a rather vanilla part of the experience to me as opposed to being defined as a fettish. No?

[Guest skrubber]

Ah, Spanky, I used to think so too. And even now I wonder what is it that makes me want to do that. Only a very select few men appeal to me in such a way. But some guys just have butts that beg to be eaten. Danny Cruz comes to mind.

For the most part, I see this as a place of no interest. But when a guy really hits my attraction buttons, and otherwise fits the agreeable criteria (clean, etc.), then allowing me access to what is essentially his most private place is quite a turn on. So, it becomes a form of reaching the sexual essence of the man, and, if I may say so without getting slammed, his sacred spot of sexuality.

 

My feeling is that you never really know a guy until you have eaten his ass