Freaky-ass porn dialogue

[+ friendofsheila]

I watched a porno scene yesterday. The father-of-the-bride was putting the moves on the groom, and was not meeting any resistance at all. I'm doing my best to forget these facts and just try to enjoy the scene when, at the the *climactic* moment, The Groom says:

 

"Oh, Mr. Clayton, I'm think I'm going to cum!" Mr. Clayton immediately says:

 

"Call me 'Dad'."

 

Oh, lordy I just wanted to shoot myself, and not in a good way.

 

*********

That reminded me of one other instance of porn dialogue that was weird. Well, it's ALL weird really, but weird in a way that stands out.

 

Closeup of a butthole and a couple of fingers are diddling it but not penetrating.

 

The camera pulls back and the butthole's owner is lying on his back on a couch, his legs in the air and has his pants and undies up 'round his knees. The owner of the fingers is a friend of the butthole and asks:

 

"When am I going to get to f*** you?"

 

Butthole Boy indignantly pulls his trousers back on and replies angrily:

 

"I can't let you f*** me! It would complicate our friendship!!"

 

***********

 

Can you think of more examples?

[+ friendofsheila]

11 years, and no one has remembered any?

 

What are you guys doing while watching porn, jacking off or something?

[+ poolboy48220]

Hahaha. I don't remember this thread, but have at least one example, not so much dialog. "Pizza Boy He Delivers", from the 80's sometimes; one guy grabs the pizza to deliver & puts it sideways under his arm to carry it.

[thickornotatall]

" I don't think I can take it..it's too big" a multitude of scenes.

[+ pdxleo]

Hahaha. I don't remember this thread, but have at least one example, not so much dialog. "Pizza Boy He Delivers", from the 80's sometimes; one guy grabs the pizza to deliver & puts it sideways under his arm to carry it.

OMG I wore out two VHS copies of "Pizza Boy, He Delivers" back in the day, good times!!!

[samhexum]

I just laugh at all the 'virgins' in videos that moan in ecstasy (and beg for the top to go harder) as giant cocks slide in easily 'the first time' they are getting fucked.

[+ friendofsheila]

One bit of dialogue that was weird because it got my attention and never let go was when Joey from Sean Cody announced about his workouts

"I think my butt's getting bigger!"

[jeezifonly]

Dune Buddies (1978)

One of the earliest “storyline” features - and the very first gay porn I saw, in its first release at the Nob Hill. Dialogue and acting was no weaker than Charlie’s Angels at the time…