Stayin Below The Gaydar Adults Only

[Godiva]

As we continue to see images of the Taliban targets being discovered and bombed by Radar and Bombs..there is another battle raging in America that to some is just as frightening.........Avoiding The Gaydar..:-) and being discovered..

 

I have a steady girlfriend who has no clue about my other safe activities..I work in a retail business where I deal with customers all day long. I also deal with some hotttt looking men. 99% of the time they have no clue that am Bi or whatever, but there is that 1% that will say to me during the conversation the standard I will have to bring my girlfriend back or she makes all the decisions. The Girlfriend word is slipped in for no reason so in some cases I know something may have tipped them off. Now I am very masculine, conservative in dress, I don't stare to long etc.. Those of you who are able to pull this off and avoid...... The Gaydar.....give me some advice...To me it seems that my really masculine customers and women have no clue but some of my customers, who may have a few things to hide themselves..are the ones who throw in the Girlfriend bit...

 

 

What do you do to stay undetected and to those of you who use this talent..What tipps you off..I am not talkin about humming Barbra Streisand, Judy Garland or being Slim and Neat..I am not any of those. All of your respectful opinions are appreciated.

 

P.S. Do you guys remember Winter Melody by Donna Summer from the Four Seasons of Love. Album..I am listening to that song now and I just love it.. Oops wait Spring Affair is next...ah how I used to dance to that song..

 

Help Me Out Guys...

 

 

Godiva

[Guest biga]

I know this may sound like a stupid question but why do you want to stay hidden ,you say you are bi by in my book thats just been cowardly and not making a decision to say which sex you prefer,saying you are bisexual is the easy way out and cowardly also beccause you are deceiving another person namely the poor sap who is unlucky enough to be your "girlfriend"and does not know what you get up to in your "other safe practices".

This is the 21st century in NYC why if you are gay cant you say that without being in the closet so deep it would need a full scale expedition to drag you kicking and screaming out, what are you afraid of,as someone who has been out and PROUD of being out since i was a teenager most people dont give a damn about you being gay straight whatever unless america has become a more fucked up place since i was last there in the spring of 2001 you are in NYC for gods sake not some rural backwater shithole in the Deep South.

I'm not saying go around with a t shirt that says in big letters 100% QUEER but by living a lie which you are deluding yourself and if you were more truthful to yourself you wouldn't have to worry about being "caught out".Andy(gay and proud of it )

[CT Dick]

>you say you are bi by in my book thats

>just been cowardly and not making a decision to say which

>sex you prefer,saying you are bisexual is the easy way out

>and cowardly

 

Biga, I think you are expressing one of the most common prejudices in the gay world. There really are people who are lucky enough to be attracted to both men and women.

 

Much to my surprise, a few years ago I watched a bi movie and got really turned on. I then tried a M/F escort threesome and truly enjoyed it.

 

I thought I was a ten on the gay scale but found myself about an eight. I still don't think of myself as bi though I do have a much better appreciation for that middle group.

 

Dick

[Guest Gentle Dude]

I really don't pay much attention to what others perceive of me and at this point in my life, I really don't care. I've always acted "straight" and pretty much the same way all throughout my life. Like you 99% of the time, people perceive me as "straight" but there's that 1% especially gay men I know (only a very few though), who'll come up to me and ask if I'm gay or bi. Before, I would probably get offended if asked, but now I just look them in the eye, smile, wink and walk away...I let them play their guessing game.

 

GD ;-)

[+ deej]

Like you GD, I'm beyond worrying what others think.

 

I'm as gay as they come, but apparently I don't project it. I've had friends who have been genuinely surprised when they find out.

 

I worked with one guy who is so swish he could out-do Jack from "Will & Grace". He used to make almost a ceremony out of coming out to new employees and the reaction was usually along the lines of "duh". :-) When he found out about me (by bumping into me and a date in a gay bar) he freaked.

 

He kept asking "why didn't you tell me?"

 

I just kept telling him who I sleep with is no more his business than the straight boys & girls in the office. }>

[Guest JT]

On a more serious note...

 

>I'm as gay as they come, but apparently I don't project it.

 

So deej, on a more serious note...how straight do you come? And how well do you "project" it? :9 I always think you are a "straight shooter"! :+

 

JT }>

[+ deej]

RE: On a more serious note...

 

>>I'm as gay as they come, but apparently I don't project it.

>

>So deej, on a more serious note...how straight do you come?

> And how well do you "project" it? :9 I always think you

>are a "straight shooter"! :+

 

ROFL

 

Well, let's put it this way....

 

With cum dribbling all over his broad chest, Max Grand exclaimed "Geez! That thing shoots all over the place!" }>

 

Some guys don't like condoms, but I appreciate the way they simplify cleanup. :+

[Guest]

>I have a steady girlfriend who has no clue about my other

>safe activities..I work in a retail business where I deal

>with customers all day long. I also deal with some hotttt

>looking men. 99% of the time they have no clue that am Bi or

>whatever, but there is that 1% that will say to me during

>the conversation the standard I will have to bring my

>girlfriend back or she makes all the decisions. The

>Girlfriend word is slipped in for no reason so in some cases

>I know something may have tipped them off. Now I am very

>masculine, conservative in dress, I don't stare to long

>etc..

 

Why do you think that just because only 1% of guys you deal with in retail come on to you, that 99% have "no clue" that you are Bi or "whatever"? (I guess that "whatever" probably means "gay" although you seem to be afraid of that word) Do you really think you're that physically irresistable? Have you considered that maybe 90% of your customers might be straight (unless you work in a gay neighborhood)? Have you considered that among your gay customers, some may know the meaning of monogamy? And that others may not find you attractive, their type, or that they may not be into picking up someone at that time?

I don't know about most gay guys, but I'm more concerned about trying to let out signals to let people know I'm gay than the other way around. I'll stare (in a subtle but unambiguous manner) at guys at the gym (and yes, I do get lucky every once in a while). When I'm particularly moved, I've been known to go up to a guy I haven't even met to ask him if he'd like to have a cup of coffee or something.

Not long ago, I remarked in another string that every guy I've met who described himself as "Bi" was a flake, at least during the time he described himself as "Bi." Of course, I've never met you, so I would not say you're a flake. Nevertheless, your message leaves some clues. Unless your original message is "bait," you're obviously ashamed of your "gay side," or you wouldn't be so worried about what complete strangers think your sexual orientation might be. Some of the people who mention needing their girfriends' opinions may actually care about their girlfriends' feelings. I, for one, have been known to want to bring someone else in for his/her opinion.

You seem to take some pride, or at least find it somewhat amusing, that you can deceive your "steady girlfriend." I'm curious as to how you would feel if she were seeing (or having sex with) other guys (or gals) without your knowledge.

[Godiva]

Hey Unicorn..you're right..you have never met me and maybe one day we will meet.. but this is a choice I have made for my present situation as you have made yours. It is completely irrelevant whether you or anyone agrees with my choice but that is not up for discussion..at least not by me..Anyway..I will not debate your version of my version because there are already some missunderstandings. Plus it will take away from my original idea which was for those guys who like me are successful at Stayin Below The Gaydar in different aspects of your life. What have you done to avoid being found out..What could I be doing wrong based on my original post.

 

Unicorn I am glad you posted..your point was well taken...on this subject... we will agree to disagree

 

Godiva

[+ Lucky]

Well, I didn't reply to this because being closeted would be a world I escaped long ago....and the message did seem directed at other guys in the forum who are also closeted.

But, on the other hand, may I suggest you read biga's final post to you?

[Guy Fawkes]

Honey,

 

IMHO we're all just SEXUAL, some of have our preferences and we lean one way or the other. So as they say "Go, Girl" to which I'll add "Be what you want to be".

 

As for dropping under the GADAR...You can't do it...I'll spot you everytime you time you drop below the horizon.

 

But, you can IGNORE the pings...When they drop the hint...Don't hear it...The smart ones will understand that it's not apprioriate in the current situation. The dumb ones will think your straight.

 

At least that's my two cents

[Godiva]

Thanxs Daddy;-)

 

 

Godiva

[Guest]

I don't know what you're doing "wrong" since I haven't met you. I doubt anyone who hasn't met you could guess at what you're doing "wrong." I don't hide my sexuality, but no one's given me a "Hey! I've got a girlfriend!" excuse unless I've actually come on to him.

[Rick Munroe]

>I thought I was a ten on the gay scale but found myself

>about an eight. I still don't think of myself as bi though

>I do have a much better appreciation for that middle group.

 

CT Dick, I thought I liked you before, but now it's in a whole new way. Just the fact that you tried it out says a lot to me.

As for me, I don't think I'd ever do a woman but I'd like to watch a straight couple fuck. Or a bitch get gang-banged. }> I don't watch much porn but when I do, I love the straight stuff, because those gals are such fucking whores and the guys get really aggressive & nasty with them. I can relate to both roles.

[Rick Munroe]

RE: On a more serious note...

 

>Some guys don't like condoms, but I appreciate the way they

>simplify cleanup.

 

And they're fun to dump out onto the bottom's chest as he jerks himself off. :9

[HooBoy]

Gay Escorts Watching Straight Porn

 

>>Rick said: I don't watch much porn but when I do, I love the straight stuff<<

 

Hmmm. I dated an escort for a short while and he preferred watching straight porn. Is this endemic to the industry or just a coincidence?

 

 

HooBoy

[Rick Munroe]

RE: Gay Escorts Watching Straight Porn

 

>Hmmm. I dated an escort for a short while and he preferred

>watching straight porn. Is this endemic to the industry or

>just a coincidence?

 

It's endemic to guys who want to see bitches taking loads in their mouths, cunts & asses!! It's something you rarely see in gay porn & something a lot of us don't get to do in real life (although that seems to be a growing trend...). If you can get past the vaginas, it's hot to watch.

 

 

By the way, I like how my ass shows up everytime I post.

[HooBoy]

RE: Gay Escorts Watching Straight Porn

 

>>Rick Said: By the way, I like how my ass shows up everytime I post.<<

 

I'd like to place MY post up that ass!!!

 

This is denerating into trash talk and I apologize. I've got to go to the grocery store and get some meat. And fruit. And butt cake....oops bundt cake.

[Guest exFratBoy]

People have all sorts of reasons for staying in the closet. So I don't get too hung up on that.

 

As one of the younger 'client" members here (I think) and a veteran of AOL chat rooms, I am always surprised how many guys who describe themselves as "closeted" "discreet" and "str8-acting" closely resemble Jack from "Will & Grace." You just kind of want to shake them and say "dude, the second you open your mouth, people know you're gay." (kind of like deej's co-worker.)

 

That said, there are plenty of women who seem willing to look past that, especially if the guy in question treats her well. Truth is many marriages are not unions of two best friends who have an incredible sex life. So a woman might figure she'd rather have a soulmate who rarely fucks her than a guy who make her see fireworks, but whom she can't stand once they're out of the sack. And then there are those who marry for money. And they usually don't get either one. Just lots of Prada.

 

As for who is coming on to you dude- wake up! I have a very hot looking straight friend who I've known since high school. And while he is often blissfully unaware of it, guys are always checking him out and coming on to him. Why? Because he's hot. He's every guy's jock fantasy come to life. (Sort of.) It sure as hell ain't because he gives off any kind of "vibe." Most very good looking str8 guys will tell you the same thing happens to them all the time. Especially if they are outgoing-- seems to encourage conversation.

(It's only recently that my buddy has started to distinguish between guys who "are just being friendly" and guys who want to jump his bones. If you're not gay, you tend to think that the reason some guy is staring at you in the gym is because your shirt is on inside-out, or you've got a booger hanging from your nose-- not that he's trying to cruise you.)

 

So don't worry. If your girl hasn't figured out anything by now, she's not going to. Straight women are always checking each other out. And you'd be surprised at how many straight guys check each other out, too. It's a competitivess thing, not a sexual thing. If you're turned on by her and attentive sexually, she ain't gonna suspect a thing.

[Guest Kevin 2]

RE: Gay Escorts Watching Straight Porn

 

<By the way, I like how my ass shows up everytime I post.>

So do the rest of us!

;-)

[Godiva]

Well put exfratboy...Unicorn..you may have hit it on the head...They may think I am hitting on them and I don't even realize it. I may have to observe my own behavior I thought it was under control..

 

 

Thanxs Again

Godiva

[Guest allansmith63]

Interesting post, Godiva.

 

I've had a rather unusual experience as I've come out to friends and family over the last couple months. I always thought that when I was closeted, I was not obvious at all. (Married, with kids, and no activity with men until just before the end of my marriage.) It's really surprised me the number of people that my being gay was not a surprise - most of my heterosexual friends had me pegged. And I'm not the least bit feminine looking or acting (support here, Tampa & Matt), so I don't have any idea how they would have reached the conclusion that I was gay. Gaydar for heteros?? Because I knitted as a child? Because I'm a fabulous (self-proclaimed) cook?

 

Anyhow, now that I'm out, I'm more than willing to exchange looks with guys - gaydar's very effective - even if it earns me an elbow in the ribs from my partner.

 

Anyhow, my 1.28 cents worth (Canadian equivalent of 2US)

 

Good day to y'all

 

Allan

[Godiva]

Oh my God allansmith...I too knitted as a child..but some male figure in my life told me to lose it ..It is only for girls...I should be playin football.;-)

 

Anyway I am interested to hear what made your friends peg you ??

 

Take care

 

Godiva

[Guest]

>I've had a rather unusual experience as I've come out to

>friends and family over the last couple months. I always

>thought that when I was closeted, I was not obvious at all.

>(Married, with kids, and no activity with men until just

>before the end of my marriage.) It's really surprised me

>the number of people that my being gay was not a surprise -

>most of my heterosexual friends had me pegged. And I'm not

>the least bit feminine looking or acting (support here,

>Tampa & Matt), so I don't have any idea how they would have

>reached the conclusion that I was gay. Gaydar for heteros??

 

I'm curious--was there ever a time you called yourself bisexual?

[Godiva]

Hey Unicorn..I never looked at it that way, in regards to allansmiths post....good observation..maybe....

 

Godiva