What’s been your most disappointing masseur experience?

[crisinsky]

Have you ever had a masseur greatly disappoint you or not live up to your expectations? It can be for any reason: iffy texts, mediocre massage, anti-climatic ending, aloof personality, no vibes, etc. 

[maninsoma]

I've had many disappointing experiences, but few that were so disappointing that I still remember them years later.  Surely one of the worst:  I hired a guy whose rate was high for a simple erotic massage, and his ad was so sexually suggestive that I (stupidly) assumed I would be getting more than an erotic massage.  Instead I got a poor therapeutic massage from a guy who kept his tank top and shorts on who talked incessantly during the massage.  There was nothing erotic about it.  I don't know if this was all part of his con artist act, but as I was dressing he spoke to me as if I could have possibly been satisfied and would want to book him again.  This occurred when I was inexperienced/naive enough to not speak up at all about the discrepancy between what his ad stated and what I experienced, so I just paid his fee and left.

[jeezifonly]

I only hire masseurs who host. A guy with training, good looks and nice mentions here neglected to inform me that the apt where he lived and did his work was brand new.  

To him. 

He had just finished moving in. Fresh paint smell! 🥴Almost nothing aside from the kitchen was unpacked. He spent an inordinate amount of my time looking for everything but the table. Oil, sheets, towels, soap for the shower - none of it at hand. The massage was meh and I did not tip. He offered a freebie repeat, but, yeah...no.

[Veryshyone]

About 10 years ago, I scheduled a massage with a traveling masseur. Good looking, well built, advertisement and reviews were positive. Upon greeting me at his hotel I sensed by his look at me and demeanor, he was not pleased. I went through with the massage. While massaging me, I touched his leg (he advertised MT), he snarled! He completed the massage which was mediocre and I left. That situation left  me with a sour note and not pursuing another massage until recently. It could be my mind set has changed and now know I would simply leave if I encountered the same. He did not get a tip!!. 

[BigDMike]

I've had a few....and I all will say is...I have learned that if my instincts are telling me something....now I listen and respond accordingly.  I no longer "give them the benefit of the doubt" when my gut tells me otherwise

Edited Friday at 12:02 AM by BigDMike

[GTC404]

Mine took place in NYC. I had first come across his RM profile when he lived overseas. I put him on my “One Day Wish List.” He moved to NY and I met him when I was there for a weekend. It was incredibly underwhelming. 
 

First, it was in a communal space where guys rent rooms for massages. He was running behind schedule with his previous appointment, so he ran out in bikini briefs and had me sit in a massage room. While sitting there, others guys kept coming in, looking at me waiting and then walking out. Not discreet and very uncomfortable. 
 

When I finally got on the table, the massage was so underwhelming I should have stopped and left. I guess I was waiting for it to get better. He kept using one hand to massage while texting with his other. By the time we got to the end, I just wanted it to be over. 
 

He messaged me after asking if I wanted to book another session. I never responded. He’s someone who gets good reviews on here, but alas mine was the opposite of most others experiences. 

[chitownguy]

I've had a few providers where I had confirmed before hand that they provide a HE.  But when a hired them at the end of the massage they wouldn't  provide it.  They would just say something like  - you can jerk yourself off if you want.

[surfdude]

i've had countless bad experiences, mostly because of my eagerness to get bodywork on a given day and lowering my research or communication "standards". one time, i had to ask the guy to stop about 15 minutes in. first and foremost, he seemed pretty out of it, he over-oiled me and applied a bizarre amount of pressure and was trying to get frisky, despite my unwillingness. looking back, i should have been able to see those signs before i even got undressed. 

i agree with everyone else in this thread - if your gut says no, it's not going to be good bodywork. 

i guess you gotta slay some dragons before you take home a princess?

[Mark_fl]

Worst masseur experience was the second visit after a good experience. Seems the things he did to get me back weren't things he did always or willingly. Disappointing.

[TonyRose]

Too many to share in one post, but I met up with a masseur from RM whose picture did not match in person. It was the same guy, but he was much older. I still decided to go for it and let him know via email and text my preference. During the massage, he was blowing on my back which was odd and then on the flip, climbed up on the table and shoved his bottom into my face. This was NOT was I wanted or expecting at all and I had to basically tap him out to get him off. After that, the massage was cut short by 30min because I was turned off but the entire experience and he still had the nerve to ask me for a tip. 
 

That’s just one story…

[Manhattan]

5 hours ago, TonyRose said:

Too many to share in one post, but I met up with a masseur from RM whose picture did not match in person. It was the same guy, but he was much older. I still decided to go for it and let him know via email and text my preference. During the massage, he was blowing on my back which was odd and then on the flip, climbed up on the table and shoved his bottom into my face. This was NOT was I wanted or expecting at all and I had to basically tap him out to get him off. After that, the massage was cut short by 30min because I was turned off but the entire experience and he still had the nerve to ask me for a tip. 
 

That’s just one story…

He said you shoved your face into his bottom. 

[Scott C]

It is disappointing when a therapist advertises shirtless, or in briefs...  and then during the massage they leave their shirt on and jeans....  Yes massaged me in jeans.   I knew he was therapeutic only, which was fine but damn...  massage like you advertise!   This happens with a well know Orange County masseur.

[Bluefin]

The filthiest apartment Ive ever seen. Stacks of dirty dishes everywhere. Dirty laundry on the floor. Dog hair. Etc. Needless to say turned around and left. 

[TonyDown]

He checked all the boxes.  I had seen him once before.  Perfect.

I was waiting outside his place.  He texted me from somewhere else and explained he needed to cancel. 

Then his profile disappeared.

That was disappointing!

I've had similar experiences to the ones mentioned above.  Fortunately this board helps avoid most, but yeah there have been some stinkers.

 

[BigNoiseDallas]

Quote

 

I've had a few providers cancel or ghost me over the years, but easily the worst session I've ever had was with a traveling masseur several years ago (second session -- the first time was OK). His motel was in a somewhat sketchy part of town. I arrived a few minutes early for my Sunday evening appointment and for some reason backed into a parking spot down a bit from his room but within viewing distance (room doors opened to the parking lot).

As I sat in my SUV and waited for my appointment time, his room door opened and two guys walked out, followed by the provider. They chatted for a few minutes, then the two guys walked off. He didn't see me sitting in my SUV.

I should have texted him and cancelled the session, faking illness, but didn't. A few minutes later I knocked on the door and walked into a very messy room. The provider said the two guys were friends of his who were staying with him. The provider appeared to be drunk or high and proceeded to give me a terrible massage using cold hand lotion. After 45 minutes to an hour, he finished me off and asked if there was anything else (forgetting that I had scheduled 90 minutes). I said "No, all good," paid him, and got the hell outta there. 

Never again. And I don't think he's been back through Dallas since.

 

[TonyRose]

4 hours ago, Manhattan said:

He said you shoved your face into his bottom. 

Definitely not my thing! It’s my bottom I need a face shoved into!