Some days, I just can’t understand why:

[Jarrod_Uncut]

…Why do many gays treat their prospective hookups, like the s*x isn’t worth a dollar?

Now, I’m not judging the fact people hookup for free. Or saying everybody should pay for any type of connection. 
 

But one thing that gets me, is how: one can say to another gay that they’re for pay, and they get an attitude or turn it down, or always have to make some sly remark. Case in point:

 

I thought I had another but, I blocked him so: message is gone. But it was something like: “I don’t pay for what I can get for free”. I responded, umm..get who for free? Not me…maybe someone else though.

I am so over the aire of entitlement that many gays have. As if they SHOULD get free access from anybody they approach. 
 

The other day, I went with a friend of mine to the Tiffany store, and he dropped $1,500 on accessories. No shade to that, it’s his money free to do how he pleases. But I know for a fact this guy also doesn’t pay most of his hookups, which are always met off hookup apps. Sure he may do drinks and dinners, which is cool.
 

But I know there’s guys out there that operate the same way: they’ll spend hundreds and thousands on material things, and drive a Mercedes/BMW. Yet won’t even offer $20 for gas, to someone who’s coming from 100 miles away to visit them. (true story).

As much as I enjoy the good clients in the biz, it’s a lot of “emotional labor” (gotta love that term) dealing with weekly instances of gaslighting behavior from potential and even return clients. Gaslighting to make me feel I don’t know how much to charge, and am delusional.
 

Meanwhile, during the Taylor Swift concert in Kansas City, people (some gay) were paying $1,000+ just for a seat. The hotels  were higher than my rate. Yet, I have to be expected to bend over backwards and forwards, just to be gaslit that $400 is too much. $300 is too much. $200 is too much. Hell, for some of these guys, they act as if $25 for gas is going to send them to the poorhouse. Meanwhile they’re bragging on this and that, and how good their job is 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

Then there’s these guys out here who have plenty of money, and a partner/husband (aka dual income), yet still expect to get free cake and eat it too. I have friends like that, and I think to myself, these people are counterproductive to everything I stand for. Why even be in their presence, if they believe sex is only worth a drink and a burger…but will spend $1,000s on high end accessories and meaningless home upgrades. But I’m crazy for asking $300?? 🤷🏾‍♂️ 

I think if I were to leave the biz, I wouldn’t even be compelled to replace hookups with the action I get from biz. Being I see and have experienced so much devaluing of gay sex, I would only do it sparingly and with someone I know is serious about having a genuine, consistent connection. 

Edited July 25, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[CuriousByNature]

I think the reality is (probably) that the vast majority of people have never, and would never, pay someone to spend time with them.  Whether they are making millions or just squeezing by.  Even $25 for gas in an age when people connect over vast distances for free through the internet.  Many people have never likely considered a paid arrangement to be an option, either out of fear, stigma, or based on the fact that they hookup with others easily without any financial incentives required or expected.  Is it possible this individual assumed you were not in the business of taking donations?  If he contacted you knowing your line of work and then still acted as if you should meet up with him on other terms, then it's probably better that you found that out sooner than later, and before agreeing to meet.  BTW I wouldn't be too concerned about what people spend on other things, whether that happens to be Tiffany products, fancy trips, expensive watches... it all comes down to priorities.  Unfortunately it can be difficult to connect with others whose priorities align with our own.  If we pin our sense of satisfaction on expecting people to behave differently than what their priorities dictate, it is hard to avoid disappointment.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

2 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

I think the reality is (probably) that the vast majority of people have never, and would never, pay someone to spend time with them.  Whether they are making millions or just squeezing by.  Even $25 for gas in an age when people connect over vast distances for free through the internet.  Many people have never likely considered a paid arrangement to be an option, either out of fear, stigma, or based on the fact that they hookup with others easily without any financial incentives required or expected.  Is it possible this individual assumed you were not in the business of taking donations?  If he contacted you knowing your line of work and then still acted as if you should meet up with him on other terms, then it's probably better that you found that out sooner than later, and before agreeing to meet.  BTW I wouldn't be too concerned about what people spend on other things, whether that happens to be Tiffany products, fancy trips, expensive watches... it all comes down to priorities.  Unfortunately it can be difficult to connect with others whose priorities align with our own.  If we pin our sense of satisfaction on expecting people to behave differently than what their priorities dictate, it is hard to avoid disappointment.

Yeah, I feel part of the change has to start with “us” (gays). As long as people give it and throw it away for nothing, that’s going to be the norm. And especially for non-White gays. I won’t go down a race card route but, that’s the other reality: Wealthy gays will let a White guy use and abuse them for thousands of dollars, yet the moment a non-White (e.g. Black) guy gets $250 and doesn’t put out, we’re every name under the sun, plus a scammer. It’s not right. 
 

When it comes to gas money, people like to make it sound trivial like…it’s something one should be able to afford. If not, they look at you like you’re a broke bitch.

But, many gays seem to be oblivious to the fact that $3+ gas for this amount of time does have an effect. I’m basically paying what California prices were for gas, back in 2018. For example, there’s one card that I use for gas purchases. And it’s likely more than that because I don’t even use it every time. It’s likely in the $500 range. 

 

 

And one guy I was briefly dating had the nerve to question my earnings, when I told him I didn’t have the gas money to go 90 miles out of my way, to see him. Because generally, I need to reserve that for clients.

I told him the next day, how dare you. So out of line, to even question me, when I’m the one spending money to go out of my way and meet. And he was too cheap to ever offer gas, but on our (last and final) date, had the nerve to discuss with someone else, how the military is paying him $24,000 to relocate Overseas for a couple years. Why even bring that up, when I just had a discussion previously that I’m hard up for funds as it is? 
 

It’s stuff like that…shows blatant disregard for the ones they want to be intimate with. I’m just breaking that down once and for all, for all the ones who look down on others who ask for gas money. Because it’s really not even about that. The main topic is much bigger than that. 
 

 

Edited July 25, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[marylander1940]

2 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

I think the reality is (probably) that the vast majority of people have never, and would never, pay someone to spend time with them.  Whether they are making millions or just squeezing by.  Even $25 for gas in an age when people connect over vast distances for free through the internet.  Many people have never likely considered a paid arrangement to be an option, either out of fear, stigma, or based on the fact that they hookup with others easily without any financial incentives required or expected.  Is it possible this individual assumed you were not in the business of taking donations?  If he contacted you knowing your line of work and then still acted as if you should meet up with him on other terms, then it's probably better that you found that out sooner than later, and before agreeing to meet.  BTW I wouldn't be too concerned about what people spend on other things, whether that happens to be Tiffany products, fancy trips, expensive watches... it all comes down to priorities.  Unfortunately it can be difficult to connect with others whose priorities align with our own.  If we pin our sense of satisfaction on expecting people to behave differently than what their priorities dictate, it is hard to avoid disappointment.

For instance, I would never share my hobby with some of friends who openly call men who hire "losers" and other names and claim "they never had to pay for sex" like a formerly frequent poster who claimed to be straight used to say in this forum of all possible places....

[Jarrod_Uncut]

17 minutes ago, marylander1940 said:

For instance, I would never share my hobby with some of friends who openly call men who hire "losers" and other names and claim "they never had to pay for sex" like a formerly frequent poster who claimed to be straight used to say in this forum of all possible places....

All the guys who claim to not/never pay for sex, do exactly that but don’t realize it. The drinks, the dinners, the driving across town, the apartment they rent so they can host, the time they spend trying to package themselves for consumption on Instagram: is not free. Going to the club spending $100, not free. 
 

But I realize I am having a moment because, the part of the country I’m in the amount of “I don’t pay for it” mentality is exorbitant. It almost seems to be a fad out in this area. Being cheap and finding it for free as much as possible, is cool. Fuck this place, giving it one more month to work out: if not I’m out of here for good 😤 

Edited July 25, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ nycman]

[Jarrod_Uncut]

And since posting this, gas went up like 30-40 cents in my area overnight 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

Gas prices just saw their biggest one-day increase in a year | CNN Business

AMP.CNN.COM

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Gas prices are going up. The national average price for regular gasoline surged by 4 cents a...

That said, going forward I won’t be expending any extra energy on stingy men, no matter how bored or horny I am.
 

And if they want to get an attitude and play ghosting games just because I ask them to do their part, then fuck ‘em. Actually, won’t fuck ‘em. They want me to go out of my way, while they do the bare minimum. I’m not for it:

Edited July 26, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ sync]

I'm not meaning to be in any way disrespectful or judgmental, but I'm genuinely curious, do you ever have a good day?

[+ Pensant]

Gas in my area is $5.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

3 hours ago, sync said:

I'm not meaning to be in any way disrespectful or judgmental, but I'm genuinely curious, do you ever have a good day?

I wasn’t intending to imply I had a bad day. In fact yesterday I had a great day. Had a new outcall appointment that went well, and later won something in a game.

It’s not about good day/bad day. It’s just bringing light to the fact it’s some shiesty people out there. Specifically, sheisty guys who are always out looking for MSM sex. They put on a facade, showering with compliments and talking how horny they are and how they want multiple loads. But it all changes when there’s a request for some payment or reimbursement. If I don’t get a no-response, I’ll get an insult, or be compared to some dick they can get for free. But wait, just a few minutes ago he made it seem like I was exactly what he wanted 🤔 

 

Edited July 26, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Jarrod_Uncut]

4 hours ago, Pensant said:

Gas in my area is $5.

I feel I’m spending the equivalent of $5 of gallon living in the area I’m in. I’ve gone to Seattle, San Francisco and San Diego where that’s common…but once I arrive to my destination, I don’t have to drive much more than a couple miles to where I need to be. Especially in San Diego earlier this year. The beach was walking distance, and tons of stores within 1/2 gallon of gas away. The only time I had to commute, was for my specific gym, to see a client or go to Hillcrest. 

Meanwhile, I’m commuting an hour or more living in thee Midwest, to visit fwbs and clients.

Some of these fwbs know that I have to drive far to see them, yet they turn their nose up or don’t even offer to cover what I spend on the ride there or back.
 

That’s why I’m just going to focus on clients until I relocate, and leave all the frugal fuck boys in the dust. They don’t value my time or energy, and it’s all about their pleasure and convenience…at my expense. Most won’t even travel too far outside of their neighborhood/town for sex anyway, so why should I bother going out of my way if they aren’t paying…

Edited July 26, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[dbar123]

To respond to Jarrod’s original question….

Over the past 6+ years I’ve probably hired close to 50 Rentmen around the world. Most  of the experiences were no more or less exciting than what I might have experienced with a random hookup.

A good 20% or so were truly exemplary and worth the money. Most Rentmen that I’ve tried are just not that imaginative.