Come now . . .

[Lookin]

I almost always come when I’m with an escort, but it’s even more important to me that the escort come. This has rarely been an issue and often I don’t mention it when I’m making the appointment. But sometimes I do let the guy know it’s important to me and ask if he sees any problems. I ask the question most frequently of traveling escorts, who may be seeing a number of guys in my city. I ask them to let me know if there’s a day where they aren’t fully scheduled, so they’ll feel more like coming. I usually get some funny or hot response, and it’s out of the way. Of course, I understand that, once we get together, the escort may not be able to come, or I may find that’s it’s not that important to me at the time. My hit rate is about 90%, and that’s fine with me.

 

Sorry for all the background, but I’m trying to figure out the best way to handle this issue in the future.

 

My first question to both clients and escorts is: Do escorts sometimes, usually or always come? If escorts come 95% of the time, I’ll take it off my list of things to ask about, leaving me with only “When and where, baby?”

 

My second question to escorts is: How do you feel about that question? Do you feel at all pressured? Do you often get this question? What’s the best way for me to ask it?

 

Thanks guys!

[Guest DickHo]

My experience is 50% of the time the escort cums. About 10% of the time they ask for more money to cum.

 

My experience also tells me that the better I know the escort, the more likely they will cum.

 

Dick

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

I think i ranted on this subject a year or so ago on this very board. I'll paraphrase here:

 

If you're paying hard-earned money to your escort and he either a) doesn't cum or b) holds you for cum-ransom, then i'd consider that some of the most crap-laden, unprofessional bullshit you can encounter. He's not an escort. He's a hustler.

 

Sex as an enveloped experience involves a pop shot. If i only wanted a singular sensation, i'd just jack-off to SeanCody and save myself a whole lot of money, time and trouble. Unless you've pre-agreed to him not busting a nut, then there's no excuse for him not to at least TRY to have a juicy-goo moment.

 

 

BN

[+ purplekow]

One of the most pleasurable aspects of sex, for me, is for me to see that my partner has as good a time as I do. In fact, it would be hard for me to have a great evening without my partner having one too. Toward that end, it is great when an escort pops a load, but if he doesn't, but still has clearly enjoyed himself, then it is not a big deal if he does not come. A sly sated smile, a sweaty chest and face, a muscular twitching of the legs all can do it for me as much as the cum shot.

[Rick Munroe]

>Sex as an enveloped experience involves a pop shot.

 

I disagree. Sex encompasses different things to different people (all Clenis jokes aside). Some just want cuddling and passionate kissing, some want bondage and water sports, some want to fuck, some want a hot fantasy role play. Some want tickling, some want gut-punching, some want a pie in the face (I'm not kidding), some just want to spend all their time rimming a hot ass. Some guys want their partner to cum but they themselves don't need to, and for some the opposite is true. I'll never forget what my Sex Ed teacher taught me: "Foreplay is not just a means to an end; it can be the end in itself." If your main concern is pushing out a load but not really enjoying the experience and being in the moment, then I think you're actually missing something. Sure, I love to cum; sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. If I know my partner definitely wants me to, I love to oblige. For others, it is all about their release and they couldn't care less if I do. I just don't see how good (or "enveloped") sex must be equated with cumming.

[Guest PWIT]

OK Ben & Rick, you got Lookin's question #1 covered. Stroke a little harder and answer question #2 please. Inquiring minds want to know.

[Rick Munroe]

>OK Ben & Rick, you got Lookin's question #1 covered. Stroke

>a little harder and answer question #2 please. Inquiring

>minds want to know.

 

I got so caught up in my memories of Sex Ed that I forgot about question #2. No, I do not feel pressured when I know someone wants me to cum. Cum pigs turn me on. }(

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Wow. Y'know, you took what i said, flipped it and totally made it sound like i think sex is only about the orgasm.

 

You couldn't be more wrong.

 

I know you're not too fond of me Rick, but next time you reply to something i've written, i'd appreciate if you take the time to digest it and possibly even do a little reading in-between the lines.

 

Let me reiterate: PAID SEX BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE should involve an orgasm for both parties unless agreed otherwise upon beforehand. You can wax poetic all you'd like about how foreplay is yadda, yadda, yadda, but let's face it...

 

When push comes to shove, we're men. Visceral creatures who crave hot, hardcore pleasure any way, shape or form we can enjoy it. Sure, getting there is half the fun, but why the hell step up to the plate if you don't at least intend on hitting it out of the park?

 

 

I'm pro-pop shot. Just this one person's opinion.

 

 

 

BN

 

 

 

PS: Pressured? Never. I expect it, so i look forward to it

[Guest novabear22031]

Sometimes I think cumming is over rated.

 

Though if I were paying for an hour or so, cumming would be an important part for me. For I will admit that that I have a cum fetish. So thanks for the heads up - I will make it clear as to my expectations on shorter "visits".

 

Though on my recent cruise with a companion for 5 days, it was less of an issue. In the longer setting, the give and take made it more fun in some ways.

[Rick Munroe]

>Wow. Y'know, you took what i said, flipped it and totally

>made it sound like i think sex is only about the orgasm.

 

Well, I was merely responding to your statement that "sex as an enveloped experience involves a pop shot." I don't see where I twisted anything. If I'd flipped your statement, it would have read "shot pop a involves experience enveloped an as sex" and that would have just been too confusing. :+

 

>I know you're not too fond of me Rick,

 

I'm sorry you feel that way. I was just responding to a statement in a post; it didn't really matter to me who had written the post and I didn't make it personal. I do dislike your practice of gossiping about and disparaging other escorts, but I don't know you and we haven't met so I really have no opinion about you personally. I try to post about issues and topics, not personal attacks.

 

>but next time you reply

>to something i've written, i'd appreciate if you take the time

>to digest it and possibly even do a little reading in-between

>the lines.

 

And would you like me to submit my replies to you in advance for editorial approval, too?

 

>Let me reiterate: PAID SEX BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE should involve

>an orgasm for both parties unless agreed otherwise upon

>beforehand.

 

That's fine for your own personal policy regarding your business, but do you really need to set the rules for others, or call them "hustlers" for not conforming to your ideal vision of how things should be? Why not just state your own personal policy and leave it at that?

 

>When push comes to shove, we're men. Visceral creatures who

>crave hot, hardcore pleasure any way, shape or form we can

>enjoy it.

 

OK, I'm sure you'll accuse me again of flipping things or not properly reading between the lines, but most guys are definitely not into "hardcore" action in "any way, shape or form." Most of us practice safe sex and lots of guys are only into the most vanilla activities with clearly drawn lines about what they will and won't do. And for some men, that "way, shape or form" doesn't involve cumming (and some can't cum, due to surgery, medical conditions, etc). Sex is a very individual, personal thing and I don't think one can accurately or fairly make blanket statements about what all men want.

[+ purplekow]

Sex is a very

>individual, personal thing and I don't think one can

>accurately or fairly make blanket statements about what all

>men want.

 

One can never make absolute statements. There are always exceptions.

 

 

As far as escorts coming is concerned, I can't afford to have escorts coming and going, so for me, while I love for an escort to come, if that puts him in any sort of prolonged down time, I would prefer his coming just before he got going. If the escort is part energizer bunny and can keeping going and going at coming then by all means come and come again.

 

A quite separate issue and a question I have for the escorts is do you assume the session is over if the client has come? I can almost always crank up a second and sometimes a third ejaculation in a session of one to two hours, though mostly I just edge and have the "Big One Elizabeth" .

[Lookin]

Thanks guys for the open and honest answers. And for making it downright steamy. I just added three names to my to do list. :* :9

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Rick, you have your own opinions. I'll leave it at that.

 

As for even insinuating that by 'hardcore' i meant anything near bareback or unsafe sex: Totally misunderstood.

 

Hardcore, or 'extremely explicit,' would mean to me straight-up, downhome anal fucking. I never put an asterick on whether it was safe or unsafe, although for the smarter ones out there, it goes without saying that wrapping it up leads to a possible longer life, both in escorting and otherwise.

 

I see no sense in continuing to lenghten this thread any more. I'm too-quickly becoming one of those posters i cringe over: The ones who feel strangely compelled to respond to each and every post about them, word-for-word, post-for-post.

 

 

BN

[Guest DickHo]

An old joke:

 

Why do you pay an escort $150 (I said it was an old joke)? $50 for the sex, and $100 for him to leave as soon as you cum.

 

How do you define eternity? The time between when you cum and when he cums.

 

Dick

[+ Charlie]

I have never counted, but my guess is that the escorts I have hired have cum approximately 75% of the time. I never mention this to the escort, because the most important thing to me is whether I cum, not whether the escort does. Unfortunately, as purplekow suggests, too many escorts seem to think the session is over the minute I cum, even if it is very early in the appointment. With proper encouragement, I am happy to cum more than once, and I'm sure I'm not alone in this feeling. However, I could probably count on my fingers the number of escorts who have cum more than once in an hour or two.

[augustman]

Just a thought, virtualy all escorts have a statement in their ads, to paraphrase,"you are not purchasing sex but companion time and whatever occurs in that time is between two consenting adults, blah, blah blah" That said, why so often do guys upon both parties cumming if lucky, start packing up with time to go?

Or my favorite question, upon my cumming at no where near the end of the appt, "Do you want me to keep going?" Duh!!

I have recently been asked 1 hour 10 minutes into a 3 hour appointment and the anal activity going about 15 min, "I am very close, do you want me to shoot?" I responded "what is your turn around time?" He stopped and said "Oh I usually only cum once"

So I said "What are we going to do for another 1 hr and 40 min?"

He did not have an answer so we backed off, but in reality every time we stopped then got going he could only last 5-10 min before he was ready to shoot again, did that twice and he was really itching to go after cumming especially since I had cum once.

[Juan Vancouver]

>Let me reiterate: PAID SEX BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE should involve

>an orgasm for both parties unless agreed otherwise upon

>beforehand. You can wax poetic all you'd like about how

>foreplay is yadda, yadda, yadda, but let's face it...

>

>When push comes to shove, we're men. Visceral creatures who

>crave hot, hardcore pleasure any way, shape or form we can

>enjoy it. Sure, getting there is half the fun, but why the

>hell step up to the plate if you don't at least intend on

 

 

Dear Ben,

 

Let me start by saying (or repeating) that as many people in this board know one of my biggest fetishes is a hot beautiful redhead. Also, when I started escorting I decided I would hire a few really successful escorts to get a glimpse of what they were about, to learn and educate myself. You were one of the three escorts that I chose, not only for your beauty, but because of your evident success in the profession. Unfortunately for me, you were much harder to meet than I ever thought, so I had to leave hiring you as just one hot fantasy.

 

I say all this because I want you to know that I think you are really hot, and I am often in awe at the way in which you have chosen to lead your career, even if it is very different to the way in which I lead mine. Bottomline, I do not have anything against you.

 

Now, I have to say that I couldn't disagree more with you in this.

 

Maybe I am very influenced by the country I live in and its laws concerning my profession. I am a professional of companionship. But also I "escort" my customers into their sexuality, their intimacy, their inner soft spots. I do not sell sex, nor bodily fluids, and I am prevented by law to do so, otherwise my license could be revoked.

 

That said, it is clear that I do have sex quite often, if not every single time that I meet a client, and in some of those sessions I cum, in some they come, in some we both do. In some sessions there is anal sex, in some there is deep kissing, in some there is none.

 

The only real important thing for me to focus on every single time, is my client; understanding his needs, his fantasies, what he asks for, what he wants to ask for but feels shy of asking... if I am succesful in making that connection with him, then I rest with the fulfillment of a job well done, and the certainty that I got close to him, that I enstablished a bond.

 

When someone asks me if I will cum, I -as always in my personal practice- am totally honest. I answer that I don't know. I love ejaculating, I strive to do so all the time since I enjoy it so much, but I will never promise, negotiate or sell that in advance just in order to attract a client or close a deal. Most of the times that has not been an issue, and I would like to think that a high percentage of my clients leave knowing that I "saw" them, that I made close, intimate contact with them.

 

Someone wise once said that there are as many valid ways to deal with human relationships as there are human beings. The same thing may be said about escorting.

 

Receive a tight hug and my best wishes for your continued success.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

A level-headed, reasonable and humanistic response Juan... I appreciate your opinion. I also see where you're coming (ahem) from.

 

I suppose the longer i escort (4 years in July), the more i come across guys who have had just terrible experiences with escorts they've seen. It makes me insanely angry that these men could be treated so badly by people they're PAYING, much less by escorts who should know better. I don't think we escorts always realize just how much good, and evil, we can do to the people we see.

 

With great sex comes great responsibility

 

I still contend that cumming is a fun and important part of sex as a whole (for me), but can understand that it's not always possible, warranted or wanted. Being a great escort also means being flexible in your expectations and sometimes just 'running with it.'

 

 

Thanks again for chiming in Juan. Your demeanor changed my outlook on this subject.

 

 

BN

[Lewis H]

And then, completely on the flip side...

 

I had one escort from Paris (pretty positively reviewed, and drop dead gorgeous) enjoy my blowing him so much that he stopped fucking me and wanted me to blow him til he came (maybe he didn't want to work at all the thrusting, who knows?) So he came, and after I asked him to help me get off, he just lay there and said,"I'm sorry, I can't. I already came. You know, I'm a man." Wouldn't do anything. I don't even recall if I came, I think I was so disgusted. What a jerk. Maybe he should have paid ME.

[+ purplekow]

Juan, as far as I can tell from your contributions to this site, you are a terrific example why we should clone human beings. I think every gay man needs to have a Juan and maybe not just one Juan but more, so you can have Juan on Juan sex and maybe a whole Juanderful orgy. But since we know none of us is perfect, what is your flaw? Perhaps a large boil somewhere? Inability to select the right wine with dinner? Inability to commit? Tendency to have non-agreement of subject and verb? Give us mere humans something of you which will make us feel superior.

[Guest PWIT]

>Juan, as far as I can tell from your contributions to this

>site, you are a terrific example why we should clone human

>beings. I think every gay man needs to have a Juan and maybe

>not just one Juan but more, so you can have Juan on Juan sex

>and maybe a whole Juanderful orgy. But since we know none of

>us is perfect, what is your flaw? Perhaps a large boil

>somewhere? Inability to select the right wine with dinner?

>Inability to commit? Tendency to have non-agreement of subject

>and verb? Give us mere humans something of you which will

>make us feel superior.

 

purple, his flaw is not knowing US city slogans. Have you not been paying attention? :+

 

Celebrate the Juander years!

His body is a Juanderland

enjoy the new Willy Juanka bar

[Louis]

PWIT... you know how to make him aware of the various slogans that are out there... invite him to each city that has one....:-)

So Juan.. you better get ready to do some travelling....:-)

[Guest TBinCHI]

As a client, it all depends on the experience I'm having and with whom I'm having it. The first escort I hired didn't cum, and, frankly I'm glad because the whole experience was so horrible that him shooting his bodily fluids anywhere near me would have probably prevented me from ever hiring again! The second escort I was with shot so powerfully all over me that I came in buckets myself. Since then, I've experienced variations on those experiences, with most escorts coming. I have also intensely enjoyed an experience where the escort did not come.

 

The bottom line is that if the escort is in tune with what I want, cumming, though very much fun, is secondary.

[Steven_Draker]

Lookin,

In my experience less than 10% ask me to cum during the session and as it has been pointed out everyone has different needs. If someone mentions to me beforehand that cumming is important to him I'll make everything to make him happy and if you're hot I'll cum even twice :+ (joke)

 

SD ~

http://www.hotsexystud.com

[raulgmanzo]

Early in my escorting I worried that after cumming I might lose interest in my client or might not be horny for the next. But after cumming I'm still turned on by my clients. It's the idea that they find me hot that makes me horny. So I'm happy to cum if and when they like though I prefer to hold off at least a little and tease myself and perhaps them.

 

However I feel no need to necessarily ejaculate or orgasm. And they are separate things sometimes. I am much more interested in my client getting off. And the more times the better. In fact I wouldn't care if the time is nearly or already up. It's cool if a client cums again.

 

Sometimes after cumming the client is anxious to end the session, but often we lay together just catching our breath and savouring the post climactic buzz. And if they are willing I like to try and get them off again. When the cum more than once they really appreciate it. And tend to become repeat customers and what a fun thing for the ego when the customer says "wow that never [or rarely] happened before".

 

Some clients have not been interested in cumming at all. One regular non-cumming client tells me he jacks off for a couple hours after our one hour session, horny from our play. Saves him money I guess! But I think it's hot and I've gone home and jacked off thinking about how he is jacking off while thinking about me! Maybe that makes me a narcissist?

 

That an escort would assume the session over after the client cums is just crazy. If my client came part way into the session and didn't want to cum again or have more sex, I'll leave IF he wants but I would never assume that. In fact I'm happy to stick around and massage his feet or even wash his dishes! We might be hired because we're sexy and horny but I really am selling my time and companionship. And that I'm extremely relaxed about going over time doesn't change things.

 

If my cumming is really important to a client than yes I would like him to mention that along with anything else that might make or break the encounter. Communication is good.

 

Raul