I want to be an escort, any sugestions?

[Bilbo]

What city are you in? What part of the market do you think you will appeal to - twink, leather, bear, etc.? Not only would information on these subjects flesh you out to the point where we could give you better information, but it would also reassure us that you're not a trolling vice cop.

[Guest Merlin]

There are several "how to" books available. "Hustlers, Escorts and Pornstars" by Matt Adams is one. "Hustling" by John Preston is another. Both are in paperback and should be available on Amazon.com.

[Guest to_be_an_escort]

I'm not there yet, but I will be in Toronto, Canada in a little while or in a surrounding area, which won't be a problem for me to go to T.O.

I'm willing to go at any market men or women. And willing to do basicly anything.

[Boston Guy]

If you're willing to do basically anything, you won't survive.

 

I would suggest that you step back and ask yourself why you want to do this. What are you trying to accomplish? Are you trying to make some cash fast? To have some fun? To start a career? To make new friends? To travel?

 

There are a million reasons to do or not do most things and if you're serious about wanting to escort, be just as serious about knowing what you want to gain from it. Set some goals for yourself and also set some standards.

 

If you want people to respect you, then you will have to respect yourself. And that certainly will include knowing what your own boundaries are and being able to communicate those boundaries, politely but firmly, to any prospective clients.

 

Once you decide to start, you will have to determine how you want to market yourself. It's the same marketing challenge presented to any business with a new product to introduce. In general, some of the keys to success will include:

 

* Determine your target market. If your target market is the whole world, that's a bit difficult. If, on the other hand, your target market is comprised of upscale men in the greater Toronto area, including visitors, that's more reasonable and you have a heck of a lot better chance of being able to understand your market.

 

* Know your target market. Do your research. Read everything you can, ask questions of knowledgeable insiders, learn as much as you can before you even start. Asking questions here is a good start, but it's only one such forum. I would encourage you to seek answers in a variety of places. The more you know before you start, the better you'll be able to be handle the unexpected things that most definitely will pop up.

 

* Know your product. If your product is yourself, determine exactly what you will offer -- and what you won't. Most escorts, at least the successful ones, seem to be able to draw a clear line between their personal lives and their professional life. Such a line is important, in my mind, for sanity and personal protection. There are a lot of loony clients and would-be-clients and just plain crazies out there. You will get an amazing number of communications from people who are not serious or who are either severely neurotic or near psychopathic. Anyone who has hung around escorts long enough will have more than a few horror stories to tell. Be sure that you don't give out personal information about yourself unless you are very, very, very sure of the person you are giving it to.

 

* Trust your instincts. Once you start, if you think you are getting into a situation that is unsafe or dangerous, you probably are. Walk away immediately. It's much better to give up a commission and alienate a client than end up in the hospital or worse.

 

* Have a backup. Choose someone in your life who you trust and let that person know where you will be and when you will check in with them. If you do not call within the specified time frame, have them call your cell phone and then take other steps to verify and then possibly ensure your safety. If you think I'm overemphasizing personal safety, you'll be happy you took care of these things when you're in a hotel room someplace (or someone's home) with a crazy or dangerous client.

 

* Respect your clients. People choose to hire escorts for many reasons. Clients range from late teens to guys in their ninety's. (One escort told me once that the best blow job he ever got was from a guy in his ninety's who took out his false teeth!) Some are successful, some are not. Some are lonely, some are just busy, some are married, all come from a complex past. All are seeking things beyond what they think they are seeking. A good escort shares a lot of things in common with a good bartender. The ability to listen well is top on the list, as is the ability to ask pertinent questions -- the right kind of questions that let people open up and talk about themselves. Another thing good escorts have in common with good bartenders is the ability to hear many things and keep them all to themselves. Chatty escorts and chatty bartenders don't last long. A lot of times, the least valuable service a bartender is providing to a client is serving a drink. Think about that when you think about what an escort should be doing or providing to his or her clients.

 

* Stay in shape and keep your body healthy and whole and clean. This goes without saying. You and your body are your product. Treat them with the utmost respect. If you intend to escort for any serious amount of time, things like heavy drinking or any kind of serious drug use should be out of the question.

 

* Set aside some personal time for yourself. Dependable time each day or each week when you are not available to your clients will be important to you as you go along. In the long run, you are your own most valuable client.

 

* Bring humor to the whole thing. There will be times that it will be a sense of humor and a sense of irony that will save you from pulling out your hair. Try to remember that most things are small things.

 

* Choose a message for your marketing. For a classic example of good marketing, go back and read what Rick Munroe has posted here over the years. His messages are (a) funny; (b) personable; © revealing of the person he wants us to see; (d) extremely consistent. Consistency is the thing to shoot for. You want people to know what you represent and what they'll get.

 

* Make sure you deliver what you promise. It's an old saying, but underpromise and overdeliver.

 

 

Those are all of the things that occur to me right now.

 

Good luck.

 

BG

[FrancoDiSantisxxx]

A Montgomery Burns Wannabe

 

"Excellent!"

 

 

http://www.gaydar.co.uk/francodisantis

[+ deej]

Brava!

[Chuck50]

BG you have said it all. He doesn't need to buy the book. YOu have given him the "Cliff Notes" HUgs Chuck

[TightBodyTouch]

I am sure that we all agree Boston Guy has nailed this concern with an all-encompassing crash course on how to begin as an escort. I can only reiterate his ideas that knowing what you can do, will do, and hope to gain from the industry is the key to your successes in any field.

 

We all come to escorting for our own reasons and whether we hope to linger in the business for years to come or use it as a means to another career we should all want to leave the landscape better looking than when we arrived or, at least, be careful not to disturb the scene as we go along.

 

If you truly want to embrace escorting and potentially the porn industry at large you should be as voracious as you can be in developing the type of escort you want to be know as. The more honest you are about your tastes and what you are willing and capable of providing as a hired companion and lover the more credible you will be and the more likely you'll achieve a regular clientele. Decide first what you enjoy doing in your private life and if you can bring that same enjoyment to new people while doing it. Surely, fulfillment can be your's both. We all have animal instincts and can easily sense when our partners are nervous, turned-off, or worse, disgusted. If you don't enjoy it, don't try to do it for a price because you probably won't be good at the act resulting in your own loss of respect, time and money. Just be honest about your body type, personal habits, and what you want out of the business and have fun with it.

 

When you're comfortable stating your personal tastes and limits you'll need to be equally cunning in how you represent yourself and how you market yourself. Do your homework. Many larger cities support newspaper publications where people are likely to find escorts, masseurs, and dancers. Likewise, there are numerous web directories and private sites advertizing companions, models, and escorts. You may not be able to afford any of them at first but many are also free to access and list your available services. Many of us post our pictures, though I know some escorts don't and they still keep regular business. If you prefer to work independent of an agency then the difference of a great picture can prove helpful to your business. You'll be able to tell which publications or ads bring you the most distribution and business and then you can filter more attention and advertising budget toward those. I find it helpful to have my ad in as many places as possible becuase I don't work for an agency and I so I feel my exposure is my responsibility.

 

I remember wondering what to charge for my services when I first started taking appointments and I pulled my answer from the research I had done. Considering the other escorts in my city, escorts in other cities who resembled me, and what I knew I might earn while working in another field. All our goals are different and any boy should conduct that same kind of research to decide on fees that will sustain their living. It's much harder to take your price up than it is to drop it and it's never a good idea to haggle or negotiate. It will probably make you feel more comfortable to have a flat rate and stick to it, especially if you prefer to say that you are charging for your time only.

 

When you are recieving your first calls and booking appointments for the first time you may feel as though you want to do anything and everything to please your clients and sustain their approval. But most clients agree that they most enjoy an escort when he is also enjoying himself. This is a fantastic opportunity to do what you enjoy, be your own boss, and bring some hot fun to those seeking your company. And the more you like what you do then longer you are likely to do it. I personally beleive that the driving force behind escorting is my own desire to please my lovers and opening myself to the spectrum of emotions and feelings that they bring to me. From time to time I ask myself if I am in sync with my goals and if I am bringing the best parts of me to each encounter. When I feel the need, I take a break to preserve my body, my mind, and my intentions and behavior. You will have to love yourself and take good care if you hope for anyone else to care about you or crave your company. If you know yourself to be great looking, good company, and a hot time in bed then love yourself for it and others will be drawn to your enthusiasm and will want to see you again and again.

 

Reading published work as suggested in the other posts is a great idea and I can add Aaron Lawrence's work, The Male Escort's Handbook: Your Guide to Getting Rich the Hard Way. But reading is going to get you so far. Your own sense of self-worth, your head for business, and your want and desire will kick in when you start working. If you've found yourself at this site asking questions chances are you're pretty sharp and your curiousity will lead you on may adventures. Good luck with your desicions and remember that as long as you are doing what makes you happy people will probably be made happy by it and by you.

 

~Merde

[Bilbo]

What wonderful, complete answers TJ and BG have given you! I hope you realize that you're going to need to read each of them several times. Then I suggest you save them and reread them in a few months. Your answer so far worries me a little bit. It seems that you feel you can appeal to everyone and that being open and available will be enough to bring them to you. First, no one appeals to everyone. Let me emphasize two points that both of these guys made - Know your product! Really look in the mirror and try to figure out what you look like to other people. Then romanticize it. A twink lover is not going to want a daddy, a daddy lover is not going to want a twink, a muscle worshipper is not going to want a twink, nor would a twink lover love most BBs. Once you have a handle on the basic package, then romanticize it. Not the other way around. And budget your advertising. You should be spending at least 15% of your income from escorting on advertising. Probably more. I'm told that for any business 10% advertising is a minimum and that for a business that wants to grow 15% is the minimum. Keep weekly books without names attached to them, or acts, just amounts. Any time that you find yourself spending more on advertising than you're bringing in for more than a month in a row, seriously consider closing the business.

 

The other guys also mentioned setting goals. You probably want to try to make at least the same amount as your monthly rent every week. And it was just published that the median weekly salary for American women is $531. (for all workers its 610 and for just men its 685) Those are all possible goals. It is soo verry imporrtant to give yourself a day off each week. It is such a temptation not to. Do it! - advice from someone who didn't always. And there will often be days when you're available but the clients aren't biting, so to speak. And there's been many a discussion here that an average of one client per day is a very good thing. So, when you're setting your fees, make sure that you can meet your weekly goal from 5 clients a week.

 

Send private emails to those escorts who are in Canada. Locals talking privately are in a position to give you more particular advice about local conditions, laws, advertising, etc.

 

Please answer this thread at least once a day. No one likes talking into a vacuum, especially when they're answering a question. You have so far. Keep up! the good work.

[Prime Muscle]

"There are several "how to" books available. "Hustlers, Escorts and Pornstars" by Matt Adams is one. "Hustling" by John Preston is another. Both are in paperback and should be available on Amazon.com."

 

I'm guessing there is not a "Escorting for Dummies" book or "The Complete Idiot Guide to Escorting" -- they have these books for every other conceivable topic

[Guest to_be_an_escort]

Thanks for the help guys!

Right now I'm just doing my research on it and working out on how I will start it out when I begin it. I'm only 18 and I'm giving myself at least until my 19 b-day to start it out or until my 20th. That does seem like a long time just to be researching or planning but I'll still only be 20, so I'll still have a long until I'm old and wrinkley and no one will want to have sex with me anymore, lol! But maybe I'll start earlier, who knows!

[Guest sebastian]

My advise to you is to do an internship of sorts, find an agency somewhere and ask if you can be a special guest. I know that a few special guests at the agency I work with are escorting for the first time. If the agency is good they can help you out a great deal, and they pre-screen the clients for you, which would make it more comfortable for you as well.

 

Good luck when you do start, and remember that the guys that answered you have been escorting for a few years. (three here)

 

 

Sebastian (Premier Philly)

[Guest DevonSFescort]

>That does seem like a long time just to be

>researching or planning but I'll still only be 20, so I'll

>still have a long until I'm old and wrinkley and no one will

>want to have sex with me anymore, lol!

 

You'll also, fortunately, have some time to think about how a statement like that would sound coming from an escort. :* One of the nicer qualities escorting can develop in a person is the ability to enjoy what's sexy about a wide variety of types, including old and wrinkley gentlemen. A lot of those guys have learned a few tricks over the years that make them a lot of fun in the sack, too.

[Boston Guy]

>Good luck when you do start, and remember that the guys that

>answered you have been escorting for a few years. (three

>here)

 

Well, not all of us.

 

My perspective is just that of a client, but one who thinks it's important to try to respect all of the people who come into and out of our lives.

 

BG

[Boston Guy]

>I'm only 18 and I'm

>giving myself at least until my 19 b-day to start it out or

>until my 20th. That does seem like a long time just to be

>researching or planning but I'll still only be 20, so I'll

>still have a long until I'm old and wrinkley and no one will

>want to have sex with me anymore, lol! But maybe I'll start

>earlier, who knows!

 

Thanks for letting us know a little more about you. It helps us frame our advice.

 

I'm may be in a minority here, but I think 18 or even 19 is simply too young to be escorting. That seems to me to be more a time to be thinking about and doing other things (school?) and concentrating on enjoying life.

 

The escorts I've met who seemed most comfortable with their choice were usually 22 or 23 or older. Also, I think that it's far easier for an 18-year old to be taken advantage of by guys than someone even just a few years older. If you were my younger brother and just starting to escort at 18, I'd be really concerned about your personal safety.

 

In any event, let me assure you from long personal experience that long planning for career changes or new business endeavors really pays off. People who jump into new ventures with just a few weeks of consideration usually don't do as well as those who have planned more carefully.

 

You've gotten some excellent advice here from the escorts who have responded. I hope you consider it carefully.

 

Good luck to you.

BG

[Guest JT]

Hey BG,

 

As usual, your post is comprehensive and thoughtful.

 

Here are my two cents:

 

>* Stay in shape and keep your body healthy and whole and

>clean. This goes without saying. You and your body are your

>product. Treat them with the utmost respect. If you intend

>to escort for any serious amount of time, things like heavy

>drinking or any kind of serious drug use should be out of the

>question.

 

- Get your basic immunization (e.g. for Hep A and Hep B).

- Get informed about STDs, determine your own risk tolerance level and know how to protect yourself and your clients.

- Good mental health goes hand in hand with good physical health!

 

 

>* Choose a message for your marketing. For a classic example

>of good marketing, go back and read what Rick Munroe has

>posted here over the years. His messages are (a) funny; (b)

>personable; © revealing of the person he wants us to see;

>(d) extremely consistent. Consistency is the thing to shoot

>for. You want people to know what you represent and what

>they'll get.

 

I thought Rick is consistent in revealing of the ASS he wants us to see!

 

 

JT

[TightBodyTouch]

Sebastian, BG, and Devon all bring about some points that are just a partial example of what kind of gems your research is likely to bring to light.

 

It certainly does help put our advice into perspective when you reveal that you are still 18 years old and unsure whether to break into this line of work sooner than later. While developing yourself personally into the kind of escort you want to be you also need to be aware of your social atmosphere. Ask other escorts in the city you'll be working about their experiences with clients, with the law that governs that area, and stay abreast of the news in the world around you to help you follow the way things work where you live.

 

At 18yrs old some people haven't had another job to speak of and so organization and accountability are going to require much discipline. Keeping a private log of your encounters can not only help you to track your earning potential but also provides a way to remember your client's preferences and tastes. But keep your little black book tucked away, lest your competitors should sneak a peek and make away with your lovers!

 

Take care of yourself and go to some measures to ensure your safety when leaving home to meet a stranger. If you have someone to confide in, let them know your habits and devise ways that can help you leave strange circumstances. At 5'4" and 110 lbs I have always been much smaller than most men and though I haven't had trouble I am always reminded to be as careful physically as I can be. Be wise about your own strengths and weaknesses and try not to let yourself get snagged in uncomfortable situations and you will be fine.

 

Considering your age once again, I suppose it's all relative and you may very well be ready to dive in and be a gorgeous porn star of the ages. At 18 yrs old I looked 14 and could barely get into a good movie, much less join this industry and put my talents to work. Of course, that didn't stop me from taking lovers of any age and race but it did keep me from making a living at it. Well... Kind of! The point is that I would have attracted too many men who may have tried to take advantage of me and I certainly would have attracted the auhorities. Just like any other profession and probably moreso in this one, you are your own calling card and the man you become will determine the men you are likely to attract.

 

I'm sure that we'll all anxiously look on as you make your decisions. And if you happen to look like me at all... don't come to Denver. Just Kidding!!!

 

xoxox ~TJ

[Guest to_be_an_escort]

Hey,

I really wan to become an escort and I want to know how I would start out escorting but without a agency?

How did any of the escorts on here start out? I would really like to know because I want to be an escort really bad.

Also how did any of the escorts get into the poorn industry? I know a lot of escorts go into the porn industry also. I want to do everything if I can. So any sugestions would be great. Thanks so much!!!

[Bilbo]

I agree with BG that you will really be too young for the profession until you are at least 21. Nor do I accept clients under 21. Right now you should be playing for freebies and learning how to do it rather than simply relying on instinct to make you "great" in bed. It won't, usually, make you any better than "very good."

 

Thank you, Devon, for pointing out one side of the triteness of the wrinkled and unattractive remark. May I point out another one? As I said, twink lovers (usually in the majority around here) don't often love the idea of hiring daddies, but daddy lovers wouldn't hire a twink either. (Twink is what you are right now, dear,unless you're a competitive level body builder, IMHO.) Well, in 1973, when I had my first client, I was a cute twink top. Now I am available mostly as a sexual healer or as a leather Master. But the clients keep coming, both newbies and repeats. May you, too, age gracefully like a fine wine.

 

Old joke - "My mother calls me Prince Ranier, because she wants me to grow old with Grace." I know you probably won't get that one, but many (not all) of my clients would. }(

[Rick Munroe]

>go back and read what Rick Munroe has

>posted here over the years. His messages are (a) funny; (b)

>personable; © revealing of the person he wants us to see;

> (d) extremely consistent. Consistency is the thing to shoot

>for.

 

And all this time, I thought the thing to shoot for was the condom (oh wait, that's "shoot in"; sorry). OK, so I went back and read this Rick Munroe's posts. I guess what he wants us to see is that he's a horny smartass. Thanks for the pat on the back, BG.

[Guest DevonSFescort]

>My advise to you is to do an internship of sorts, find an

>agency somewhere and ask if you can be a special guest.

 

Another, more informal, variation on the internship option is to find an escort who can "mentor" you, ideally someone you have a nice sexual chemistry with so you could join him on threeways with clients. I've occasionally done this with friends of mine. They found it less scary than going to meet a client on their own and it helped them to make their decision as to whether escorting was something they wanted to do (in some cases the answer was yes, in others no).

[Guest Ant415]

To be an escort...

 

<<I'll still only be 20, so I'll still have a long until I'm old and wrinkley and no one will want to have sex with me anymore>>

 

I still remember a passage from a book of John Rechy's, but I forget the title. The line goes: "Old hustlers never die, they just start buying it back". Replace huslter with escortto update the line. Not meant to be hostile (as someone here claimed I was), but more remark about karma.

 

In the same vain, you may find it worthwhile to hire an escort now. You can see how he does his job, how he handles clients, and see what cues for starting sex, stopping sex, paying and so on. Also, at the same time you can see what it feels like to pay for sex, thus can relate to future clients.

 

Learn how to make conversation with men that are typically older and more educated that you. Might mean reading the Wall Steet Journal to know the news in business, check out some musuems and art galleries. Many clients don't just want a fresh young guy, but one that is personable and can have a conversation. Many guys in their 20's cannot have decent dialogue with a man in his 50's, as there usually is not a lot of common ground. However, I have met some younger men that were amazingly comfortable with men decades older, able to talk about art/wine/travel/cognac/politics.

 

Be good in sex. People will hire you for sex, so they expect you to be a pro. Set your ego aside for a second and think if you are really a good fuck. Most guys will never admit they are anything less than the hottest stud in town. I don't think the average 18 year old has enough experience to be a great top, bottom, or cocksucker. Technique comes with practice. I am not saying you are bad in bed, but generalization.

 

Realize some men will not be your type. Might be issue of race, size, or age. The good money you are to receive for the sex should make you set aside all your negative feelings aside. The client expects you to an enthusiastic partner. He paid money to avoid rejection and silly games in bars. Try to find something enjoyable with or about the client and focus (one guy told me he zoned in on the guy's ears). You will not last long in the business if you appear to be unattracted to some clients. There may be some clients you find genuinely hot, and some genuinely troll-like, but most will be average/decent men. But you have the right to expect a client to be clean, friendly, and sober.

 

Learn to manage money. It may come in fast, but don't let it go to fast. Save some for the week you are sick and cannot even think about sex. Don't be in a position to be forced to take a trick because you are desparate for money.

 

Learn to good with follow-up and responses. A simple thank-you email after a date will take you a minute or two, but will do lots for your image. Weed out the crazed guys, and then respond to serious email in FULL. One thing I hate is when ask an escort couple questions in an email like rates/best times/in or out, and so on, and he replies to one point.

 

Realize the 10-20% of email/phone/web inquires will net a booking. The rest are thrill-seekers or others wasting time.

[+ Lucky]

"I have met some younger men that were amazingly comfortable with men decades older, able to talk about... "

 

... themselves!

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Yes, there are some great books on the business out there..

 

The one book that many have read & recommended around these parts is one that i don't particulary care for: Aaron Lawrence's 'How-To' Escorting Book. While that's not the exact name, i have read it completely and have always found it to be horribly clinical & just plain insincere.

 

If i was a client and i read this book, it would definately make me think twice before hiring Aaron, much less the men who have based their careers off his book. The book concentrates too much on 'faking it' and trying to get as much (monetarily) out of your client as possible using some pretty shady tactics. I remember reading through this book and thinking 'i cannot believe escorts would use some of this bullshit and more so, that a client would fall for it.' Specifically, Aaron writes about 'being more affectionate at the end of an encounter to garner a bigger tip.'

 

 

That isn't an escorting tactic... That's just being a hustler, plain & simple.

 

 

 

My advice for someone starting out would be to identify your target audience and go from there. Be honest. Be safe. Be yourself. If you're dealing with clients who have a drop of sense, they'll see through your put-on personality in a second. Most of all, remember to have a good time out there. If you're not enjoying yourself, then it's likely that your client isn't either. Best of luck & if you ever need any help or advice, you're more than welcome to email me

 

 

 

 

Warmest Always,

 

 

 

 

Benjamin Nicholas

[Rick Munroe]

>Specifically,

>Aaron writes about 'being more affectionate at the end of an

>encounter to garner a bigger tip.'

 

Yuck. Sounds like it's a good thing I've never read any of his books.