Up Front...Scam?

[VersOral]

Sorry if this is in another topic, the searches I did only showed comments from 2016 as the most recent responses. I'd like a little more 'post pandemic' perspective.

Recently chatting with a 'provider' and I'm interested. Finally get around to his fees, after a little more back and forth than I prefer, and we agreed to rate I thought reasonable. He asked me to cashapp him half up front. I've had issues with the app before, thought I had been hacked etc. and told him I wouldn't use cash app. His response is to tell me to go buy a specific gift card, and tell him when I've gotten it. 

To be clear, I don't have any reason to hire this guy at this point now. The final straw for me was the gift card request, my question is if other providers are really doing this now? I get the options of leaving the money out, maybe paying part when they get there etc. 

Thankfully our correspondence has only been via message, I don't feel like I've been on the phone with a scammer for an hour that has asked this, but it's not far off...

[Shawn Monroe]

Most anything with a gift card is going to be a scam. I work for a major corp and they made a whole page warning of that stuff. He could be honest but prob not. Love you 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 4/23/2022 at 6:40 PM, VersOral said:

Sorry if this is in another topic, the searches I did only showed comments from 2016 as the most recent responses. I'd like a little more 'post pandemic' perspective.

Recently chatting with a 'provider' and I'm interested. Finally get around to his fees, after a little more back and forth than I prefer, and we agreed to rate I thought reasonable. He asked me to cashapp him half up front. I've had issues with the app before, thought I had been hacked etc. and told him I wouldn't use cash app. His response is to tell me to go buy a specific gift card, and tell him when I've gotten it. 

To be clear, I don't have any reason to hire this guy at this point now. The final straw for me was the gift card request, my question is if other providers are really doing this now? I get the options of leaving the money out, maybe paying part when they get there etc. 

Thankfully our correspondence has only been via message, I don't feel like I've been on the phone with a scammer for an hour that has asked this, but it's not far off...

 

Me personally: I am asking for partial donations upfront from new clients. I’ve not gone the route of half, because it is more for the initial consultation.

That said, the 🚩 flag isn’t so much that the person asked for half upfront, the flag is that there wasn’t an exchange of numbers and the discussion is taking place on messenger without (as I assume?) no number provided or exchanged. Then, doing gift card stuff is the other give away. Similar to how I don’t book clients from the RM messenger or A4A without a phone number, you would at least want to have a number. And make sure it’s not some phony text mail or other knock off service either. Some client yesterday arranged a booking on text mail with me, which I didn’t realize until I called upon arrival. I blocked him 2 years ago for weird behavior, but he slipped thru and was even more off than the last time 🤦🏽‍♂️ 

That said: there’s people out there who think everyone who’s asks for payment ahead is a scam. I’m staying committed to my new way of doing things. Many are accustomed to pay upfront in full for Uber, Priceline, and pretty much everything else online. Hiring an escort online really shouldn’t be much different. The business just hasn’t evolve enough to be able to do that, but I’m doing what I need to do for now. 
 

There’s a separate escort forum overseas where someone discussed how they used to be in the biz in the early 2000s, and was busy busy. Person retired and then returned and noticed so many calls nowadays aren’t serious. I feel the same. I don’t know what it is, but for me it’s just better to have something to work with upfront, versus just taking randomly inquiries round the clock.

Edited April 26, 2022 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Quincy_7]

It's typical for an escort to ask for cash upfront at the start of a session but not before they've even met you. If they're asking for an upfront payment before they or you make the trip over then that's likely a scam.

[John]

2 hours ago, Quincy_7 said:

It's typical for an escort to ask for cash upfront at the start of a session but not before they've even met you. If they're asking for an upfront payment before they or you make the trip over then that's likely a scam.

I disagree. I rarely encounter a money-up-front provider, and when I do, I decline the session.

[Quincy_7]

2 hours ago, John said:

I disagree. I rarely encounter a money-up-front provider, and when I do, I decline the session.

I was recently in London and all three escorts I met asked for money up front. One even let me know in our whatsapp chat before we even met that he would need money up front. 

An escort once told me that he asks for money up front because he's been cheated in the past. Honestly, I get that and don't take offence. It would be an issue if a repeat escort asked me for money up front (I don't recall that happening previously) but on a first time meeting it's not an issue for me at all. There's no reason for an escort to trust me the first time we meet.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

9 hours ago, Quincy_7 said:

It's typical for an escort to ask for cash upfront at the start of a session but not before they've even met you. If they're asking for an upfront payment before they or you make the trip over then that's likely a scam.

Unless it’s someone like me with lots of good reviews 😉 

https://rentmen.eu/Jarrod_Brandon

I wish I could still do things without a deposit like I used to, being able to do things without much screening effort. But I feel because of the disappearance of craigslist, RM has become the “universal” site for all kinds of hookups. There’s people who I know personally, have RM client profiles, and have 0 intention on actually hiring someone. Or if they do, they’ll waste time of many before actually booking anything. Which they’ll likely cancel anyway.

So I’m all about debunking this myth that guys asking for cash upfront is a scam. True, some who are may be. But that doesn’t speak for all. I charge deposits “exclusively”, and you won’t see anybody on my review page talking about I scammed them. 
 

considering this is ask a provider, I think it’s only fair providers speak up. 

 

 

[Quincy_7]

25 minutes ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

Unless it’s someone like me with lots of good reviews 😉 

https://rentmen.eu/Jarrod_Brandon

I wish I could still do things without a deposit like I used to, being able to do things without much screening effort. But I feel because of the disappearance of craigslist, RM has become the “universal” site for all kinds of hookups. There’s people who I know personally, have RM client profiles, and have 0 intention on actually hiring someone. Or if they do, they’ll waste time of many before actually booking anything. Which they’ll likely cancel anyway.

So I’m all about debunking this myth that guys asking for cash upfront is a scam. True, some who are may be. But that doesn’t speak for all. I charge deposits “exclusively”, and you won’t see anybody on my review page talking about I scammed them. 
 

considering this is ask a provider, I think it’s only fair providers speak up. 

 

 

Regardless of your rationale, by asking for a deposit you immediately lose cash-only guys like myself. I can't take on the risk of having escort payments tracked back to me and there are many others who won't either.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

17 hours ago, Quincy_7 said:

Regardless of your rationale, by asking for a deposit you immediately lose cash-only guys like myself. I can't take on the risk of having escort payments tracked back to me and there are many others who won't either.

Reality is: even cash paying clients can still do a deposit as well. There’s ways. Some have even mailed me cash, which I don’t recommend but…something better than nothing.
 

As for losing cash paying guys, the thing is: They’ll probably be lost anyway. Again: it assumes if, IF they actually fully go thru with it. Which, lately it seems they don’t. Maybe they will, maybe they won’t. Who knows? All I know is: Me being a paid provider doesn’t start AFTER the session or AFTER I book a hotel or AFTER I drive to XYZ. It starts the moment I pay $79.99 or $39.99 on RM. 
 

The unfortunate part is there are scammers out there who mess things up for the genuine ones. But there’s also bad apple clients who mess it up for the potential good ones too. Like I say, some clients talk about being “taken” once or   twice. Whereas I may deal with a similar situation multiple times in a month. 
 

It’s also true that some markets require a deposit more than others. I know for a fact, I refuse to work in Denver or Kansas City without a deposit these days. Same as with Atlanta, Chicago or other overly escorted cities.
 

But right now, it’s not so much a market/city thing but more of a personal need. I need to be able to do other things with my time, besides being contacted all hours of the day at random by people who are just making “inquiries” and not following thru. 
 

 

Edited May 1, 2022 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Rudynate]

I got together with a well-known provider in Las Vegas last summer.  He initially said he would need a deposit and I said "Sure, that's not a problem, how do you want to handle payment?" When he saw that I was willing to pay the deposit, he ended up waiving it.  I appreciated his trust, but I was happy to pay it - I knew I was going to show up and I was confident that he would, so why not pay it?

[Jimjaxon3]

21 minutes ago, Rudynate said:

I got together with a well-known provider in Las Vegas last summer.  He initially said he would need a deposit and I said "Sure, that's not a problem, how do you want to handle payment?" When he saw that I was willing to pay the deposit, he ended up waiving it.  I appreciated his trust, but I was happy to pay it - I knew I was going to show up and I was confident that he would, so why not pay it?

My company sends me to places that are near a bigger city.. just not in a big city… I understand the rationale of asking for a deposit because I’m askin them to drive hour or two to meet me. I have been taken 2 out of 8 times.. it’s pretty good odds but I’d still like to be able to spot the frauds better. The gift cards are always a red flag. 
 

i have a guy now asking for half.. I said how about one hour, and he has declined back to half. I feel it’s a red flag but he has 17 good reviews on RM. It’s always nerve wracking to figure out what to do

[Jarrod_Uncut]

9 hours ago, Jimjaxon3 said:

My company sends me to places that are near a bigger city.. just not in a big city… I understand the rationale of asking for a deposit because I’m askin them to drive hour or two to meet me. I have been taken 2 out of 8 times.. it’s pretty good odds but I’d still like to be able to spot the frauds better. The gift cards are always a red flag. 
 

i have a guy now asking for half.. I said how about one hour, and he has declined back to half. I feel it’s a red flag but he has 17 good reviews on RM. It’s always nerve wracking to figure out what to do

Here’s an article from another industry, which includes real life responses: that should help squash every “deposit=scam” rumor out there for good (would be nice lol)

https://behindthechair.com/articles/what-would-you-do-charging-your-clients-deposits-for-appointments/amp/

 

“Always charge a deposit for long appointments and new clients. We are too busy for wasted appointments. If they are serious they pay the deposit no questions asked!” – 
@thehairboutique814

 

“I always take deposits. I take 50 percent deposits for color…No deposit, no appointment! Simple as that.” – @lucieluella

 

Edited May 2, 2022 by Jarrod_Uncut

[VersOral]

Lots of interesting takes on this. Thanks guys.

As I said before, it was more the method the deposit was to be paid that raised the red flags, earlier in our discussion he had stated he took a deposit, and I continued the conversation. Perhaps my bad luck with being hacked on cashapp might have played into my assessment, but I think you'd agree that if something doesn't feel right it's not worth the booking.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 5/4/2022 at 8:03 PM, VersOral said:

Lots of interesting takes on this. Thanks guys.

As I said before, it was more the method the deposit was to be paid that raised the red flags, earlier in our discussion he had stated he took a deposit, and I continued the conversation. Perhaps my bad luck with being hacked on cashapp might have played into my assessment, but I think you'd agree that if something doesn't feel right it's not worth the booking.

Wait a sec. I must have been “wining 🍷” when I read the original post and missed something. I didn’t see where you said he originally asked for cash app, and you said you don’t have it…and then he asked for the gift card. I thought the gift card was the only thing he asked for. In Europe, many of the lady providers do this because it preserves client discretion.

At the end of the day: one can’t always “prove” beyond a doubt that someone is a scam. Except if it’s a blatant “engineer from Canada living in Nigeria” type of scam. 
 

I know for me, people likely get scared off when I mention deposits. As much as I understand and hate to lose business, I can no longer operate without them. In fact, even clients who do send deposits, some of them still cancel/change up at the last minute. Without deposits, having an ad up is basically getting scammed on the DAILY in this current market. RentMen and Masseur have become the new Craigslist ads: people talk about meeting but not actually doing it majority of the time. 
 

I think too the problem in America (and especially being an independent and running your own biz) is, too many believe anybody doing any kind of business with money “upfront” is a scam. But what people don’t want to admit is: most of the frauds are not coming from the businesses.

I had a client last week who called me, asking to come over, in a town I was visiting. I told him about my deposit, and he was like: “I don’t do deposits, but THANKYOU”. He must have slipped past my blocked list, because a previous message last year showed he was “catching an Uber” to my hotel, and never showed up or replied. 

That just reinforced why I need to stick to them. If you weigh my credentials (reviews, pics, website, business card) versus theirs (can’t host, no pic, no reviews, just a phone number with a sprinkle of interest), the one who should be worried about a scam is me, not them.  

 

Edited May 20, 2022 by Jarrod_Uncut