The only disability in life is a bad attitude

[ArmyHands]

Is it just me... or am I going CRAZY .. that guys are still RACIST is the Gay Community...

 

I post Massage ADS on Google / Twitter and Massages(s) Site since 2001

 

My Pics / Stats etc are posted etc... for Less Back n Fourth Emails and 100 Texts

 

Then Guys Show up I still hear:

- Oh Did not not you was BLACK

- Sorry Not into BLACKS

- Wished I had know you was BLACK I would not have shown up

- Geez Wiz Thought you was WHITE

-You Sounded WHITE on the phone...

 

This Crap is getting on my last NERVES !!!!

 

Any other(s) CMT out there with this same problem........

[CMail01]

They clearly see you are black before booking and show up and say this? STUNNING. And yes there are plenty of racists who are gay. It really hits me in the heart when I hear it come from someone. “You f’ing moron. You understand we are minorities too, right?”

[MrMattBig]

Sad but truely a problem across all aspects of sexual interactions. I know at least from the female sex worker side they will sometimes just describe themselves as mixed with something 'exotic" to get ahead of clients being prejudiced to them for being black. And sadly it works a lot of time even it though it shouldn't even have to come to that.

[cany10011]

Why should skin color determine the “quality” of the massage you are providing?? It may be a different matter with escort services as everyone has different sexual preferences... but for a massage... i don’t see why it would be an issue.

[Dmitri]

Is it just me... or am I going CRAZY .. that guys are still RACIST is the Gay Community...

 

I post Massage ADS on Google / Twitter and Massages(s) Site since 2001

 

My Pics / Stats etc are posted etc... for Less Back n Fourth Emails and 100 Texts

 

Then Guys Show up I still hear:

- Oh Did not not you was BLACK

- Sorry Not into BLACKS

- Wished I had know you was BLACK I would not have shown up

- Geez Wiz Thought you was WHITE

-You Sounded WHITE on the phone...

 

This Crap is getting on my last NERVES !!!!

 

Any other(s) CMT out there with this same problem........

 

I am confused. If you post your photos, and you are black, then why is a client surprised you are black when they show up? It does not sound like a race issue, since if I see a photo of a white masseur, an Asian masseur, or an African American masseur, then I know who I am going to receive a massage from. So if you post your photos as a black man, why would a client be surprised that a black man answers the door? As I mentioned, it sounds like some other issue is at play here.

Edited September 19, 2019 by Dmitri

[Monarchy79]

Is it just me... or am I going CRAZY .. that guys are still RACIST is the Gay Community...

 

I post Massage ADS on Google / Twitter and Massages(s) Site since 2001

 

My Pics / Stats etc are posted etc... for Less Back n Fourth Emails and 100 Texts

 

Then Guys Show up I still hear:

- Oh Did not not you was BLACK

- Sorry Not into BLACKS

- Wished I had know you was BLACK I would not have shown up

- Geez Wiz Thought you was WHITE

-You Sounded WHITE on the phone...

 

This Crap is getting on my last NERVES !!!!

 

Any other(s) CMT out there with this same problem........

 

No surprise here... plenty of gays are racist, and are usually the most vile and viscous with it. I see it everyday. Don’t let rainbow flags and the glitter fool you ???

[JayCeeKy]

According to broadcaster, editor of The Daily Voice, CNBC contributor, and former White House aide to Bill Clinton (the highest ranking gay person in Clinton's WH), Keith Boykin: "The dirty little secret about the homosexual population is that white gay people are just as racist as white straight people".

[MrMattBig]

I am confused. If you post your photos, and you are black, then why is a client surprised you are black when they show up? It does not sound like a race issue, since if I see a photo of a white masseur, an Asian masseur, or an African American masseur, then I know who I am going to receive a massage from. So if you post your photos as a black man, why would a client be surprised that a black man answers the door? As I mentioned, it sounds like some other issue is at play here.

Depending on the lighting in the pictures and editing, one of color can easily appear lighter in pictures than what they are to no fault of their own.

And most do not understand how and why a person of color can "sound white". And most people do not read details in ads, so much so that I feel I could have a career in marketing because of the skills I acquired posting ads on Craigslist in such a way that people would end up reading without really reading. All this coupled together is why this actually happens in some way shape or form to a lot of black providers and within intimate encounters as a whole.

[jjkrkwood]

No surprise here... plenty of gays are racist, and are usually the most vile and viscous with it. I see it everyday. Don’t let rainbow flags and the glitter fool you ???

 

I certainly AGREE with you, but I would hope it was more of a PREFERENCE thing, which people often DO equate with racism. I DO NOT. I have always seen hiring as a Fantasy thing. You want to have sex with your DREAM man. However this dream man may not be black. That alone does not make you racist IMO. Racism is a much more pervasive quality.

[Monarchy79]

Is it just me... or am I going CRAZY .. that guys are still RACIST is the Gay Community...

 

I post Massage ADS on Google / Twitter and Massages(s) Site since 2001

 

My Pics / Stats etc are posted etc... for Less Back n Fourth Emails and 100 Texts

 

Then Guys Show up I still hear:

- Oh Did not not you was BLACK

- Sorry Not into BLACKS

- Wished I had know you was BLACK I would not have shown up

- Geez Wiz Thought you was WHITE

-You Sounded WHITE on the phone...

 

This Crap is getting on my last NERVES !!!!

 

Any other(s) CMT out there with this same problem........

 

1. Make it clear on your ads that you are black

I certainly AGREE with you, but I would hope it was more of a PREFERENCE thing, which people often DO equate with racism. I DO NOT. I have always seen hiring as a Fantasy thing. You want to have sex with your DREAM man. However this dream man may not be black. That alone does not make you racist IMO. Racism is a much more pervasive quality.

 

I think you just like debating with me... don’t you ??

[Monarchy79]

I certainly AGREE with you, but I would hope it was more of a PREFERENCE thing, which people often DO equate with racism. I DO NOT. I have always seen hiring as a Fantasy thing. You want to have sex with your DREAM man. However this dream man may not be black. That alone does not make you racist IMO. Racism is a much more pervasive quality.

 

I’ll say this:

 

Preference is the “decision and choice”

 

Racism is the “foundation for that choice”....

 

Let’s dig deeper....

A shop owner may not want to bake wedding cakes for gay clients.... that’s their preference.

 

Declining service to gays is the choice.

 

Homophobia and bigotry towards gays is the foundation and source of that choice.

 

 

My point is this. People have the right to make decisions however they choose. Those decisions may come from an unfair and unreasonable place and a construct of beliefs and principles that aren’t “politically correct”.

 

But calling it “just a preference” doesn’t lighten the impact.

 

So in this black masseur’s case..

These customers are expressing their preference not to be massaged by a black man....

 

That preference is based on their beliefs about black men.

[Monarchy79]

According to broadcaster, editor of The Daily Voice, CNBC contributor, and former White House aide to Bill Clinton (the highest ranking gay person in Clinton's WH), Keith Boykin: "The dirty little secret about the homosexual population is that white gay people are just as racist as white straight people".

If not more racist. And any gay person of color will l tell you... we get our first “wake up” call when we “come out”, and attempt to join gay world with open arms.... and the first mistake you make is going to a predominantly white gay bar...

 

That’s where you get that first taste of racism... lol

[jjkrkwood]

 

So in this black masseur’s case..

These customers are expressing their preference not to be massaged by a black man....

 

That preference is based on their beliefs about black men.

 

Again, all TRUE, and agreed, BUT that preference may NOT be derived from HATE... just what they feel is more attractive to them.

 

Its not always as simple as black and white, but sometimes IT IS.

[jjkrkwood]

If not more racist. And any gay person of color will l tell you... we get our first “wake up” call when we “come out”, and attempt to join gay world with open arms.... and the first mistake you make is going to a predominantly white gay bar...

 

That’s where you get that first taste of racism... lol

 

I think in gay culture, its the white man that covets the black man. And yes it may be "Mandingo syndrome" but nevertheless I for one am more into "men of color".... But racism has always existed, and will continue to exist, and while some may brush it off as Preference, you really need to dig deeper, (as you have continued to say) before you start calling people racist or defining groups.

[MrMattBig]

Call it what you may, I think people sometimes are too quick to act on their "preferences".

I mean why would someone like the pictures (let's assume recent and real) presented in an ad enough to make contact to set an appointment, have even further information available to them as far as stats, just to cancel

and /or have contempt and resentment once they see a person in the flesh???

[Monarchy79]

I certainly AGREE with you, but I would hope it was more of a PREFERENCE thing, which people often DO equate with racism. I DO NOT. I have always seen hiring as a Fantasy thing. You want to have sex with your DREAM man. However this dream man may not be black. That alone does not make you racist IMO. Racism is a much more pervasive quality.

Again, all TRUE, and agreed, BUT that preference may NOT be derived from HATE... just what they feel is more attractive to them.

 

Its not always as simple as black and white, but sometimes IT IS.

 

Ahhh,

 

I see the disconnect here my friend.. ☺️

 

Racism isn’t always and solely based on hate....... just because you may not hate a group of people, doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not racist.... I’ll explain...

 

In the masseur’s case, in some cases, the potential clients may absolutely hate black people.. we would obviously agree that’s definitely racist.. but going into the other negative stereotypes, beliefs and assumptions that marginalize him... such as

“Black people smell “wierd”

“Black people arent “clean”

“He is a down low thug, and may rob and kill me”

“He might have AIDS”,

Are bundled into the “preference” category... but literally have the same impacts as the originally noted “hatred”, I just mentioned...

 

This black masseur has limitations on earning money because of beliefs that are watered down into preferences, but when looking deeper, are still built from a foundation of racist beliefs and ideologies.

[Monarchy79]

I think in gay culture, its the white man that covets the black man. And yes it may be "Mandingo syndrome" but nevertheless I for one am more into "men of color".... But racism has always existed, and will continue to exist, and while some may brush it off as Preference, you really need to dig deeper, (as you have continued to say) before you start calling people racist or defining groups.

 

As you are a white guy who has a preference for black men.... think about those times over the years where you’ve been in an all white gay male setting and had the courage to express your preference......now remember the commentary you got back....

 

?

 

We all know it wasn’t roses and complimentary either... lol

Edited September 19, 2019 by Monarchy79

[Monarchy79]

Again, all TRUE, and agreed, BUT that preference may NOT be derived from HATE... just what they feel is more attractive to them.

 

Its not always as simple as black and white, but sometimes IT IS.

 

I agree with that. I also think that we should start asking ourselves why we have these “preferences”... the source of the preferences are deep rooted in beliefs and things we were taught in our environmental upbringing.

[jjkrkwood]

 

 

I think you just like debating with me... don’t you ??

 

I dont believe I am, just stating MY opinion, which is in agreement with many points you have raised. As I am NOT black, I would never be so presumptuous as to debate a black issue with a black man, who certainly comes at the issue from a different, more educated and realized viewpoint. I think all I am trying to get across is that today, we are very quick to pull a race card, especially when it comes to issues of sex, where I think if you are white and choosing a white over black partner, you need to know more about motivation before calling that person a racist, simply for his sexual choices. . I have absolutely NO beef with you Sir Monarchy.

[Monarchy79]

I dont believe I am, just stating MY opinion, which is in agreement with many points you have raised. As I am NOT black, I would never be so presumptuous as to debate a black issue with a black man, who certainly comes at the issue from a different, more educated and realized viewpoint. I think all I am trying to get across is that today, we are very quick to pull a race card, especially when it comes to issues of sex, where I think if you are white and choosing a white over black partner, you need to know more about motivation before calling that person a racist, simply for his sexual choices. . I have absolutely NO beef with you Sir Monarchy.

 

I was speaking in jest...☺️??

[jjkrkwood]

As you are a white guy who has a preference for black men.... think about those times over the years where you’ve been in an all white gay male setting and had the courage to express your preference......now remember the commentary you got back....

 

?

 

We all know it wasn’t roses and complimentary either... lol

 

Here I disagree, because it has always been afirmative, as well with my family, who once they KNEW my preference, were always supportive. It may be an aberation, but it was my experience.

[Monarchy79]

I dont believe I am, just stating MY opinion, which is in agreement with many points you have raised. As I am NOT black, I would never be so presumptuous as to debate a black issue with a black man, who certainly comes at the issue from a different, more educated and realized viewpoint. I think all I am trying to get across is that today, we are very quick to pull a race card, especially when it comes to issues of sex, where I think if you are white and choosing a white over black partner, you need to know more about motivation before calling that person a racist, simply for his sexual choices. . I have absolutely NO beef with you Sir Monarchy.

 

I think the other disconnect is that I don’t think our choices are that compartmentalized...

most white guys I have seen from

personal experience, prefer a world where there are no people of color.

1.) their dating is exclusively white

2.) their friendships and platonic relationships are exclusively white

3.) their interactions in business are exclusively white

4.) they also ensure that their entertainments venues and travel destination minimize color as well...

 

So it’s typically rare that a person who has this “preference”, only limits their preference to sex.... they typically expand that preference in other aspects of life, business and entertainment that has tremendous impacts...

 

Why this concerns me is “Mr. Preference”, may also be at the table of many job interviews... who’s to say that a well qualified black man didn’t get hired because “it’s just a preference” ?

Edited September 19, 2019 by Monarchy79

[Monarchy79]

Here I disagree, because it has always been afirmative, as well with my family, who once they KNEW my preference, were always supportive. It may be an aberation, but it was my experience.

I wasn’t referring to your family.. I was referring to peers... other gay white men.

[MrMattBig]

I agree with that. I also think that we should start asking ourselves why we have these “preferences”... the source of the preferences are deep rooted in beliefs and things we were taught in our environmental upbringing.

Especially when unpacking said preferences reveal negative affirmation aspects that are not ones preference. In terms of race for example, one can prefer whites simply because lighter skin tones are more aesthetically attractive, and not really have anything to say about darker skin tones, simply because those who fall into that category never catch their eye. Once we focus and verbalize negative affirmations (I don't do...) is the moment that we have moved away from simply preference, and are manufacturing exclusionary and prejudice ideals.

[Monarchy79]

Especially when unpacking said preferences reveal negative affirmation aspects that are not ones preference. In terms of race for example, one can prefer whites simply because lighter skin tones are more aesthetically attractive, and not really have anything to say about darker skin tones, simply because those who fall into that category never catch their eye. Once we focus and verbalize negative affirmations (I don't do...) is the moment that we have moved away from simply preference, and are manufacturing exclusionary and prejudice ideals.

 

You just hit the nail on the head!!!

Eloquently stated!!!